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Mothering › Groups › July 2013 Due Date Club › Discussions › how to DTD?

how to DTD?

post #1 of 15
Thread Starter 

I'm serious. DH and I can't figure out how to have sex. We bedshare and during naps I maaayyybbeee can put her down in her swing for 5 minutes but rarely longer. If she does tolerate it I feel obligated to use that time to clean. So, seriously, how the heck do you have sex when you are a parent? Is this another one of nature's birth control methods?

post #2 of 15

if you figure it out, let me know!  I think it's one of those things that will improve gradually, along with the rest of the return to normalcy.  for now, Oliver's nickname should just be "little cockblock."

post #3 of 15
We found time (once so far) after she went to sleep, but we're not co sleeping so that makes a big difference I think. She is in our room though and it was a bit difficult for me to relax while she was grunting and snorting and making her sleep noises next to us, but she didn't wake up so it was ok.
post #4 of 15
We put the kids to bed (ruby sleeps in our bed) and do it somewhere else. On the floor, couch, in the kitchen... You get the idea. Cleaning can be done while baby is awake! Sex is a priority for me! Gotta keep the flame going! wink1.gif
post #5 of 15

I agree with Kalista, cleaning can be done when the baby is awake.

Kalista, I will never look at your couches or kitchen the same way. 

post #6 of 15

Totally agree with Kalista -- gotta start thinking outside the bed!

 

I've been putting Clover down (we also bedshare) at 8-9 pm and she has been great with this. So my husband and I have been getting a few hours of alone time each night, which we were desperately needing! It's just great to be able to cuddle on the couch (and couches are great for other things, too, of course).

post #7 of 15
We have had great luck in tthe laundry room smile.gif and the car (in the garage)
post #8 of 15

haha - while I respectfully disagree about being able to do anything around the house while the baby is awake (gotta try that woven wrap soon!), my new attitude toward household chores is just "f it, it'll get done when it gets done!"

 

but the two or three times we've been able to get down have required the kind of creativity you're talking about.  :wink  I suggest shared showers for optimum multitasking.

post #9 of 15
Quote:
Originally Posted by rf1170 View Post
 

haha - while I respectfully disagree about being able to do anything around the house while the baby is awake (gotta try that woven wrap soon!), my new attitude toward household chores is just "f it, it'll get done when it gets done!"

 

but the two or three times we've been able to get down have required the kind of creativity you're talking about.  :wink  I suggest shared showers for optimum multitasking.

 

Chris and I quite enjoy shared showers, and have a handle to make things easier. My dad was visiting and this conversation happened:
Dad: hey, where'd you get that handle in your shower?
Me: uhh..you don't want to know, please don't ask

Dad: but I want one, where'd you get it
Me: Dad, seriously.
Dad: just tell me

Me: we got it at the taboo sex show, but you can probably pick up one from Shoppers home health or something.

Dad: uggghh, why'd you tell me that!

post #10 of 15
Thread Starter 

Boo. I think I'm paranoid. I do not feel comfortable leaving Jaya on the bed unless I am in view or just running to the bathroom.

 

I can get some stuff done with her awake but not dishes. My new form of baby belly is too big for my arms to reach the sink lol. That's what makes my house gross too. Please, santa, bring me a dishwasher for xmas!!!

post #11 of 15
Yeah... This is exactly why I am ok with co-sleeping and room sharing now, but don't want to make it permanent if we can help it. We haven't DTD yet, but I am ok with LO in the room asleep in her bassinet... For now. Any older and it would just feel weird. At least now she will be oblivious. But can I be oblivious of her? Hmm...
post #12 of 15
We had our first in our room until she was over a year. You get used to it if you really want to have sex! Lol. And like I said... There are other spots in the house!
post #13 of 15
Quote:
Originally Posted by rainbownurse View Post
 

 

Chris and I quite enjoy shared showers, and have a handle to make things easier. My dad was visiting and this conversation happened:
Dad: hey, where'd you get that handle in your shower?
Me: uhh..you don't want to know, please don't ask

Dad: but I want one, where'd you get it
Me: Dad, seriously.
Dad: just tell me

Me: we got it at the taboo sex show, but you can probably pick up one from Shoppers home health or something.

Dad: uggghh, why'd you tell me that!

 

 

hilarious.

post #14 of 15
Bad parent alert! I accidentally found out Lila is entranced my the movement of light on the TV. Tonight we put her in the bouncy chair and turned on a nature documentary. She sat totally still for 10 minutes while we DTD. Totally scary how it held her attention. It was great for us though!
post #15 of 15
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chipi View Post

Bad parent alert! I accidentally found out Lila is entranced my the movement of light on the TV. Tonight we put her in the bouncy chair and turned on a nature documentary. She sat totally still for 10 minutes while we DTD. Totally scary how it held her attention. It was great for us though!

 

I put Jaya in front of Hey Bear youtube videos when she's super fussy to distract her. I also put on a fireplace video and she watches that with Jack Johnson before bed. It'd the only thing I've found that puts her to sleep without a fight. The no-tv ship has sailed out of this house =/

 
Back on the DTD topic. We tried it yesterday and it hurt sooooo bad... couldn't even finish :( anyone else? Suggestions?
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