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Queer Conceptions October - Page 6

post #101 of 142
Hi everyone! I used to post here earlier in the year but have been on a long break trying to lose weight and figure out financials. We were able to purchase 4 vials of frozen swimmers with my FSA so we will be trying again in December or January. Ultimately I have a feeling that we will be saving up for IVF because this will be my 6th IUI and I think we will stop at 8 or 9 just because of the cost each month. I am working on scheduling my HSG and it looks like it will be done next week on Halloween - ha!

I have been reading along for the last 7 months and it's been great following all the IVF stories. Does anyone have advice as to where to start looking for a clinic? There seems to be so many in my area!
post #102 of 142
Thread Starter 

fille – how are you doing?  Thinking I was behind on moving people around, and remembering you said you were insemming last week, I moved you to the TWW – is that where you want to be, or are you still in waiting to O mode? 


bettertomarry – lots of folks have weighed in on your question about timing for using frozen sperm, but I’m not sure people have mentioned their timing with fresh (and I don’t remember which you’re doing).  For me, with a kd and fresh sperm it has worked pretty well to insem the day before and the day of the positive opk.


redrock – how are you doing? When will you test?

jam – I’m glad you’re getting ready to try again. I think we’ll be on a similar schedule next month, so we can be excited and scared together.


sandie – good luck with your insem today! Hope it goes well!


SanDiego78 – I hope your timing works out for the next ivf batch!


pooka – I hope your symptoms lead to a bfp and aren’t just that tricky progesterone! Speaking of – so glad it is working for you too. I was surprised that it delayed my cycle, since last time I was on it my cycle was still the regular length, but you’re right – a 14 day lp is a good thing. Those last few days of the wait are so hard. Hang in there!


Prettyisa – I’m crossing my fingers for you. I’m sorry the others didn’t make it to freezing, but it sounds like you have a good, practical perspective on everything. When will you know the status of things?


Thanks for all the support this month. I had no idea how emotionally taxing starting the ttc process again was going to be for me, since I’m usually pretty good at handling emotionally difficult things. Even though it is a bummer to not get that bfp, I think I needed to go through this month so that I can be in a better place (hopefully) next month.


I’m excited to see what happens with everyone in the final week of October!

post #103 of 142
hey Isa - sorry to hear that. I also had none for freezing and was a bit disappointed but that soon changed and I hope when you get your BFP it won't matter xxx
post #104 of 142
ps forgot to say you'll never guess what? My brother rang me last night - he & my SIL are due within a week of me!!!! They didn't think she could get pregnant as she has a problem with diabetes & another illness and I'm so chuffed for them! So excited!!!!
post #105 of 142

Darcy - good to hear from you, we are using the San Diego Fertility Center, and will be starting IVF very soon...they are well known. I know a few people who got pregnant/recently delivered through working with them.  I also know a doctor well in Orange County who runs an IVF clinic, she feels the IVF centers are better down here in San Diego, than LA, which was interesting to hear.

post #106 of 142
Darcy--Where in the country are you? I found mine on recommendation from a local blogger friend (turned IRL friend) and have sent about a million lesbians her way. People seem to feel strongly about their REs (both pro and con) so maybe you'll get some good suggestions that way!
post #107 of 142

SanDIego78 - Thanks for the info! I saw that you were able to get a partial loan. Was that through the clinic or someone they partner with? Also, do they have you pay everything up front or do you get billed after each visit? How many months would you say it takes to get the ball rolling? I am trying to plan ahead but not sure how much time it really takes. 


Isa - I am definitely interested in getting recs from other lesbians. I live in San Diego and will be paying out of pocket so I would like a few options to choose from.  

post #108 of 142

Hey, Darcy!  We are also in San Diego, and we have actually now been to the three main REs in San Diego county, so I can tell you all about them.


We started up at HRC in Oceanside because they actually had a page on their website about same sex couples.  Turns out you have to do a lot of things at their Newport office, which is just too far for us to do on a regular basis.  We LOVED Dr Coffler and were less thrilled with his nurse, who made some big errors (like switching our blood samples for our genetic testing)!  We did all of our testing through them, but soon realized it wasn't practical to drive up there multiple times a month.  Too much time off from work.


We found FSMG because they were much closer and also had a page about same sex couples on their website.  We would return to them for IVF because they're less expensive for it than where we are now.  They do charge MUCH more for IUIs including really ridiculous "sperm fees" and when we told them other practices charge less, their financial person told me we were misinformed (we weren't; we just wrote a check for our $700 IUI clomid and ovidrel cycle--at FSMG it's 1180 plus 200 for "receipt and thawing of sperm").  It's a shame, because lady and I would probably have preferred to stay with them, since every time you switch practices, you have to do another 2-hour consultation, where they do an ultrasound, get your history, and then have you meet with someone from financial to talk about your benefits.  


Even though San Diego Fertility said they charged $275 for this consultation session, we still were going to save money on an IUI by switching to them, so we finally did after our second IUI with FSMG.  Turns out we only had to pay a 35 copay for it, so it was a better deal than we thought.  The locations are great for us, Dr Park is a dream to work with--intelligent, friendly, straightforward--and we are saving HUNDREDS.  It's great to hear that Sandiego78 loves them too, because we JUST did our first IUI with them today and are excited.  They charge significantly more for IVF (mostly their surgical facility fee) so we probably won't go with them if we get that far, as FSMG and HRC are both cheaper for it.  Biggest complaint right now is that we've had four appointments so far at two different offices and they've never been on time for a single one.  They even rescheduled lady's IUI to an hour earlier, then made her wait 40 minutes in the waiting room until she asked someone what was going on.  


btw, Lea, can you move us to TWW?  this was the first appointment i've ever not made it to with lady, but I had to give a midterm, so we actually recorded cell phone videos for each other to play during the actual insem.  


oh, ps Darcy, we also went to a 2 hour consult at Suzann Gage in North Park, she does natural IUIs, but doesn't do any monitoring at all, just IUI.  she teaches you a lot about tracking, but we felt like for now we would take advantage of the precision offered by monitoring and Ovidrel, since frozen sperm has such a short life span.  hope that helps!  

Edited by sandiegongp - 10/25/13 at 6:50pm
post #109 of 142
Sandiegongp - thank you so much for all of that information! What is the cost difference between the two for IVF? That is going to be our biggest hurdle. I am so glad you found a doctor that you like and congrats on your recent IUI - lots of luck to you during the tww!
Edited by DarcySD - 10/26/13 at 6:46am
post #110 of 142

And... I'm spotting. So I guess I'm out for this month. I don't know what was going on with all those symptoms. This also only gives me a 10 day luteal phase. It's an improvement over 8, but it's not enough. I'm so disappointed. Do you guys think that things are still balancing out and that I'll see a bigger improvement on the LP next month?


Not sure if we'll continue trying after next month because it gets in to the academic calendar and could mess with life all around. Our backup plan has been to just make ourselves open to another relinquished child and hope that we hit the baby lottery the way we did with S. It's also still at least until March if not July until we know what's going on with A. He's 13 months old now and has been with us for 9 months. I <3 that guys so much, it breaks my hear to think of him leaving.

post #111 of 142

pookafaye - ugh so sorry. I can't remember if you said you are using progesterone to help with your luteal phase? My LP is always 9 days and the last two IUIs we used it and it extended my LP all the way to 13-14 days. 


Trying to decide how to use the 4 vials we have left. Part of me wants to do 1 insem each cycle so I have four chances but the other part really wants to do 2 per cycle because frozen swimmers have such a short lifespan and I always feel like our timing is off. I was thinking of maybe doing a compromise with 2 insems the first try and leaving the 3rd and 4th vials for single insems. 

post #112 of 142

Actually - I'm still -only- spotting. This could be implantation bleeding. Cross your fingers for me! The blood is more than I expected for that - but this is not at all normal for my cycles. I might spot at night and wake up with my cycle, but I never just spot all day long. Today is 11DPO so we're right in the window, but when I POAS that's still negative. Here's hoping for a BFP - I'll keep you all updated.


Darcy - I am indeed using progesterone (OTC cream) for the LP. I'm so glad I used it this morning even though I sensed the oncoming bleeding - a drop in the levels would have doomed me for sure.


Redrock - Do you test tomorrow too?


Liz - How wonderful that your new little one is going to have a playmate so close in age - that's an amazing blessing!


Pretty - How long until you can test? If I remember from my sister's IVF, the started testing about 4 or 5 days after the transfer, but I could be wrong. How wonderful would it be if we had a week full of BFPs!  

post #113 of 142
Potok, we go in on Friday. Last time we tested and got an inconclusive (broken) test, which was worse than not knowing. I had a dream last night that it didn't work, so I'm trying to prepare myself for that possibility. I hope it's implantation bleeding!
post #114 of 142
Also, 'Potok' is a weird autocorrect for 'pook', huh?
post #115 of 142

Hi all, just have a minute but I took a test this morning (well two tests) and got a very faint BFP! It's so crazy. DW didn't believe me but we kept staring and it seems to be true. I'll keep testing until AF is due (thursday) to make sure. It doesn't seem real and we are just hoping it decides to stick around. 


DW's sister and boyfriend are staying with us so I've got to run but I'll be back for personals later. 

post #116 of 142


YAY!!! So happy for you! Here's hoping the bitty one sticks tight.


Woke up to another BFN and my actual cycle. (I think I had to test anyway just to be absolutely sure after I had to second guess things yesterday. Move me back to waiting to O.

post #117 of 142
Thread Starter 

Congrats redrock! Very excited for you!


Pookafaye - sorry to hear about af. It does sound like the progesterone helped a bit with your cycle length, and I wonder if that is also to blame for the symptoms? 

post #118 of 142
redrock yay, how amazing is that. Lots of sticky thoughts to you!
post #119 of 142

Redrock - CONGRATS!!!!! I am sending sticky baby vibes your way! 


Pook - So sorry :( I can only imagine how many different emotions you have been feeling these past 24 hrs. 


Pretty - Hopefully you can keep yourself busy this week and Friday will get here quickly. Hopefully your dream was not a reality but I can understand trying to mentally prepare yourself. 


Darcy - I don't have much experience to speak too but my Dr recommends only doing 1 vial at a time. One of the nurses also told me, her previous employer did a study with two vials verse one and it showed that there wasn't a benefit of doing two. I have only had one IUI and used 1 vial at about 26 hrs after a positive OPK and got my BFP. 


Sandie - Good luck keeping busy during the 2WW!


AFM - Nothing new to report here... CD7 today and AF has now left... Will start doing OPK on Wednesday, CD10, since I'm not 100% what to expect this cycle and that's what my Dr recommended, although I don't anticipate a positive until early November. 

post #120 of 142
redrockband!!!! Congrats!!!!!!
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