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October Chat - Page 3

post #41 of 96

That's so scary, orchidez!  I'm glad everything is ok with the baby, but that sounds so stressful and it sounds like you still need some recovery.  Get lots of rest between now and Sunday.

 

I'm always so anal when family visits about getting naps and regular sleep in as much as possible.  I feel like a jerk because neither my mom nor my MIL think twice about sleeping (or eating!) and I feel like I'm constantly breaking up their fun.  They would just go, go, go all day.  MIL regularly wants me to wake DS up from naps because she gets tired of waiting for him.  Um... do you guys remember having kids at all??? 

 

I've been feeling a little off too, but I know it's just because I've been pushing myself too much and not drinking enough.  DH is talking about taking DS camping this weekend.  I have to work, but I'm hoping he's being serious.  I would love to have the house to myself for a couple days.  Best present ever.  We're still potty training here and it's actually going super, but the huge downside to doing it so young - at least for us - is that it requires a lot of reminders on my part and just a lot of vigilance.  He's becoming more and more independent every week so I don't want to stop or go back to diapers, but some days I just want a break from thinking about the stupid potty!

post #42 of 96

Glad to hear you and baby are okay, orchidez! How frightening.

 

I turned 26 weeks today. My belly has finally grown larger than my breasts, so maybe I will finally start looking pregnant soon. I had my first braxton hicks contraction while pulling a loaf of bread out of the oven this past weekend. It was exciting!

 

I am finding myself probably too laid back about getting baby stuff. I have almost nothing. I have picked up a few cute outfits here and there if I see something on sale, and a few friends have given/sold me their old diaper stashes, but I can't even bring myself to do any baby related preparation or think about what I need/want beyond the birth experience...I have no idea why. I am thrilled for the pregnancy and I am so excited to meet this little guy, so it is not that. I feel like so many other moms try to strike up conversations/bond about what I have purchased, which brands/models of things I have chosen, etc....and the reaction is weird when I say I don't have stuff/don't know what I want or need. I know that I want to be very minimalist this time around, because I almost never used so much that I had last time around....but it is hard to wrap my head around what will actually feel essential for this babe. A 22 year old baby mama (my age last time around) is probably very different than a 36 year old baby mama....maybe I will want a stroller or baby holder contraptions other than wraps/slings or carriers? I just don't know!

post #43 of 96

Oh man guys, I'm not feeling good at all.  Every time I stand up I have a long contraction and then weaker ones as I move around.  Even sitting seems to be too much exertion.  My pelvis and abdomen and back are all hurting.  It is actually bringing up some flashbacks of labor, the way it hurts - especially my back.  I'm going to drink some water and lay on the couch for a bit to see if that helps.  I still hurt quite a bit when I lay down, but I think I have a little SPD going on too so it's all just really confusing.  LO is still moving, but nothing crazy.  Haha, well, ok, there was a big kick!

 

How was your appointment this morning OrchideZ?  Any progress on you obstruction?  :p

post #44 of 96
Cwill- Oh no! I will keep you in my prayers! Just try to relax as much as you can and hopefully you will be back to normal soon!
post #45 of 96
Thread Starter 

Neaera - Very much the same here. Excited about the baby, yes very much so, but sooo laid back about it all. Maybe it's the infrequency of the midwife appointments, or the amount of beings in the house and the demands on time.

 

I have some cloth diapers from last time (small amount), have clothes from my son and daughter just not sure how much baby clothes and obviously don't know what this little bean is.

 

Yes - lots of braxton hicks and kicking / movement has increased a bunch. One of her / his favorite moves is to jab me on two sides in my pelvis simultaneously. Dancing a jig?

post #46 of 96

I haven't gotten much of anything yet either. I still have all my cloth diapers from DD at least. We will be set if we have another girl because I saved DD clothes and my sister has a son who is almost a year and said I can borrow all his clothes if it is a boy, if I want. So I feel pretty set with that stuff. I need to get a new car seat and stroller or wrap. I have a sling so I might just settle for using that. In all honestly I would probably have all this stuff already if it weren't for money being so tight. Ugh I feel like I still have plenty of time but as fast as the time has been going I feel like he/she will be here before I know it. 

post #47 of 96

OrchideZ and cwill, I'm so sorry and yet it's also nice to know I'm not alone...

 

I started having a lot of cramping/lower abdominal discomfort/is it contractions or not?! about two weeks ago (26 weeks), which I initially thought was just a combination of feeling braxton-hicks earlier and all my muscles/ligaments being more sore this time around, plus a fair bit of lifting I had been doing. But then a week ago I started bleeding ever so lightly but steadily and started to worry. As I am planning a homebirth I immediately wanted to rule out a placenta previa, and also was having trouble reaching my cervix to confirm that I wasn't dilating with the cramps (darn it, can't bend over very well anymore!). Thankfully I work for a wonderful OB and she was happy to do a minimal ultrasound (I really don't want ultrasound unless really needed... the bleeding convinced me I really needed to know where my placenta was, but I still didn't want to look at at the baby - she was very respectful of this, though we got a glimpse of just five little toes pressing against the side of my womb while we were looking at the placenta and that was pretty sweet...) and confirmed my placenta is indeed right where it should be, high up and far away from my cervix... which she said was 20-30% effaced and slightly loose, but not alarmingly so for a second baby.

 

Thankfully the bleeding stopped after a couple days, and also the cramping. I've been trying hard to drink lots of fluids and rest more and that seems to be the trick - yesterday I was rushing around a lot trying to do a million things and started cramping again, but this time I immediately drank a big glass of water and tried to slow down and it stopped. Resting is easier said than done around here - we cook on and heat with a woodfired cookstove and last weekend when I told my husband I needed to rest his response was "okay, I just need you to split some wood for the night and I won't ask anything else of you"! (I'm sure it's so effortless when he does it that he doesn't even consider that it might not be others... and I've even been known to say I enjoy splitting wood...) This weekend I "just" have to help butcher a pig and cook lunch for 20 people... Normally, not a huge deal, just what we do, but these days I just feel like lying in bed!

post #48 of 96
Thread Starter 

I think the biggest thing I am concerned about is car seat and size of cars. We still have our LOs in the britax convertables (with the exception of one 5 point harness booster that is Evenflo or Graco I think. We have no mini van. We have subaru forrester and nissan sedan. Are we going to be able to get 3 carseats in? My LOs are 6 and 4.

 

Also I had two dreams that are bothering me from last night. The first I was in an OBs office (I think one of my co-workers made me go) and I was arguing with him. He did a pelvic exam that made me bleed and then tried to do an ultrasound and another procedure without consulting with me first. I unloaded on him and "set him straight". Then I had a dream - or part of the same dream - that I was walking into the bathroom of my house and looked out the window. I was shocked to see it was vert windy and snowing / almost hail like. I went into the bathroom and the house started spinning and lifting off of the ground.

 

Fear of losing control, having to fight for a natural birth? Not too obvious the dreams huh?

post #49 of 96
Quote:
Originally Posted by lilyofjudah View Post
 

OrchideZ and cwill, I'm so sorry and yet it's also nice to know I'm not alone...

 

I started having a lot of cramping/lower abdominal discomfort/is it contractions or not?! about two weeks ago (26 weeks), which I initially thought was just a combination of feeling braxton-hicks earlier and all my muscles/ligaments being more sore this time around, plus a fair bit of lifting I had been doing. But then a week ago I started bleeding ever so lightly but steadily and started to worry. As I am planning a homebirth I immediately wanted to rule out a placenta previa, and also was having trouble reaching my cervix to confirm that I wasn't dilating with the cramps (darn it, can't bend over very well anymore!). Thankfully I work for a wonderful OB and she was happy to do a minimal ultrasound (I really don't want ultrasound unless really needed... the bleeding convinced me I really needed to know where my placenta was, but I still didn't want to look at at the baby - she was very respectful of this, though we got a glimpse of just five little toes pressing against the side of my womb while we were looking at the placenta and that was pretty sweet...) and confirmed my placenta is indeed right where it should be, high up and far away from my cervix... which she said was 20-30% effaced and slightly loose, but not alarmingly so for a second baby.

 

Thankfully the bleeding stopped after a couple days, and also the cramping. I've been trying hard to drink lots of fluids and rest more and that seems to be the trick - yesterday I was rushing around a lot trying to do a million things and started cramping again, but this time I immediately drank a big glass of water and tried to slow down and it stopped. Resting is easier said than done around here - we cook on and heat with a woodfired cookstove and last weekend when I told my husband I needed to rest his response was "okay, I just need you to split some wood for the night and I won't ask anything else of you"! (I'm sure it's so effortless when he does it that he doesn't even consider that it might not be others... and I've even been known to say I enjoy splitting wood...) This weekend I "just" have to help butcher a pig and cook lunch for 20 people... Normally, not a huge deal, just what we do, but these days I just feel like lying in bed!

My dear- you are doing too much!  Your body is telling you to slow down and you must listen to it.  I know what it is like to feel like you need to just get that next thing done- but it isn't worth it....  It will happen even if someone else has to do it.  We were planning on butchering this fall too- but there can be no "we" this time.  I don't even think I am going to be able to get my chickens cut up myself this year.  I really get it- but you must slow down.

post #50 of 96

I stopped in L&D today because I had to work last night and this morning and it made everything pick up again.  I was fine, baby was fine.  Which is good, right?  But also frustrating because basically living my life is causing pain and contractions and I'm not sure where to cut back.  We're way overextended right now.  DH and I both.  Oh well.  My real appointment is on Tuesday so I'll talk to my OB then about stuff.  I'm on call until there so I guess I'm just crossing my fingers I don't get called out.  Or I get called out in town (and during the day!) and I can just bang it out quickly.

 

I agree with iowaorganic though.  Especially with bleeding, make sure you slow down! 

post #51 of 96

orchidez- Scary! I hope you are feeling a bit better now and have gotten your much needed rest! 

 

cwill- Hugs! I'm happy you and babe are ok.  So sorry you feel all that stress. Perhaps you will get some clarity soon to where you can cut back. 

 

lilyofjudah- Holy moly girl splitting wood?? I'd pass out right now :lol   Dh is just now realizing that I'm slowing down too. I don't think he can deny the belly anymore. Slow down sweetie- to whatever pace keeps you and the baby feeling in good shape. Ask for more help- they will understand :)

 

cat- I vote for fear of loss of control :)  The house spinning around would have freaked me out! Anything in particular worrying you besides car seats?

 

AFM- Oh man. Looks like I will be firing my midwife. We had a very negative appointment yesterday. Basically I continue to walk away from appointments not feeling like I was heard out. She has a very over corrective type of personality that is just not jiving with me or dh. She kinda jumped down dh's throat yesterday over something stupid. Then I just could not get out my opinions on the GD test. I was just trying to convey a few points that I had spinning in my head. She stopped me so early with "facts and benefits" before I could get anything substantial out. I know what the facts and benefits are- not that she would ever ask me what I research I've done- I was tryng to make a point about proactivity. I have continually felt a little shut down around her but have dismissed the little things until now. Its just been increasingly worse. So at almost 28 weeks I'm off to interview more midwives again. Certainly not what I wanted to do this late in the game but it is proving necessary. 

post #52 of 96

JJ, i am really sorry to hear that :( I was thinking about switching from my OB to the midwifery group at the same hospital, but after my last (24 week) appt with the OB I felt really comfortable with her and do not want to change. I also overheard her end of a phone conversation with another patient with a borderline GD test as I was checking out and was really impressed with her perspective, information, etc for that client so I feel good about that.

 

We are signed up for our birthing class/hospital tour in the fall and the nursery is coming together - I'm 26 weeks tomorrow and starting to feel like I need to get things ORGANIZED!

 

Still can't decide between a diaper service and buying diapers; if I am going to buy I kind of want to buy now/as things go on sale. Leaning toward buying diapers as I want fitteds...

post #53 of 96

Ugh, Jenny that stinks.  Had you interviewed many previously?  Or at least have a way to narrow down the amount of time you spend finding someone?  There are a lot of things I don't like about my OB personality-wise; but ultimately I respect the way he handles pregnancy and birth and I have enough friends who have seen him when their births went sideways (premature, breech, homebirth transfer, etc.) to have total trust in his competence and empathy and demeanor during birth.  But I know exactly how you feel about being able to talk to your care provider because I always come away from our conversations feeling not listened to! 

 

polyhymnia - the get-my-act together hit me in the last few days as well.  I'm ready to start making a list of stuff to do before now and then and I've started collecting and testing recipes for freezing for afterwards.  As far as diapers, we had a gift certificate for a service and did have prefolds and covers, but I never ended up using the certificate.  We also had some pocket diapers, fitteds and contours that I used more.  DS hated the prefolds.  Every pee was a major ordeal and newborns pee a lot!  And doing the wash just wasn't a big deal.

 

@OrchideZ - please check in when you get a chance.  I know your weekend was going to be busy, but I'm hoping everything is still ok for you.

post #54 of 96

Well probably if I had followed my own advice to slow down and quit doing so much I wouldn't be on bed rest right now.  If anyone thinks they should just power through it- I am telling you this sucks way way more.  Being allowed to only get up to pee is a miserable way to spend your days while looking at all the things that should be getting done :(  Sorry for the whine but this is awful.  My DH told me it is because I stayed out too late on my MNO on Thursday (which I did) but it probably wasn't from me helping him fix the combine or rearrange and fill the freezer or any of my normal stuff...  Sorry.  I am cranky and hormonal.

post #55 of 96

Iowa- :Hug Hugs. Everyone deserves to whine a little. Looking at the walls and making mental lists that can't get done must be frustrating to say the least! I hope your bed rest is temporary so you can get back to things soon. With modifications of course :wink

 

cwill & poly- We are having a  home birth so I don't have a ton of midwives to interview. I did phone interviews with 2 and liked them both so I will call Monday to set up appointments to chat in person.  One of the (many) reasons that I chose homebirth was to have a more equal partnership in the birth process. If we can't communicate on a basic level its a no go for me. I chose her because she had the most experience of everyone in the area. Mistake for sure! 

 

  I'm in the "I have nothing done" for the baby camp too. 28 weeks tomorrow and am starting to feel the pressure. Since this is our first I am kinda waiting on gifts but I think everyone is gonna wait til closer to xmas. Which is really to late for me to plan accordingly. I really wanted to avoid having to sell/return doubles but I may not be able to. I only have some clothing and receiving blankets that I bought at a yard sale. Nothing else! 

 

   Up until Friday my pregnancy thus far has been drama less. Well now I'm in over drive! Midwife called yesterday to tell me I am rh-. All my life I had been told my blood type was AB+. My labs had come back B-.  I am so shocked that no one has ever confirmed my blood type. The reason I'm freaking out is because of all the miscarrages I've had. My RE only asked us what our blood types were. At that time we thought we were both +'s so he didn't order a antibody test and rh- factor was dismissed. Come to find out we can't even confirm dh's blood type. Just another thing to add to the list of things to freak out about. :eyesroll

post #56 of 96

iowaorganic, I'm so sorry you're on bed rest.  That's got to be so frustrating and boring.  Has it helped?  Is there a light at the end of the tunnel or will it be for a long time still?  When I went in to the hospital, the nurse said the same thing as you.  She said that it was great that everything was ok, but that didn't mean that I could just go back and do what I was doing.  Because the alternative is that everything is not ok and then you're on bed rest, which is way worse than slowing down a little in regular life. 

 

Jenny, I totally understand needing to be able to communicate and feel comfortable with your care provider.  I have definitely switched doctors in the past for problems along those lines.  There's just something about my OB, though.  I'm willing to give up the communication part.  It can be frustrating, but I'm still super comfortable with him.  It's weird.  I hope your interviews go well and you find someone who is experienced and respects you.  It shouldn't be so difficult to get both, should it???  I also can't believe your RE didn't test your blood type.  I don't think it should have much of an effect on TTC, but it's such a basic thing to look at and is relevant for decision-making later in pregnancy.  Will your DH find out his type? 

 

I'm feeling a bit better though work has been nuts and has caused some problems.  I didn't get to sleep until 6 am this morning and I got started at 5 am yesterday.  Boo.  But I've cut way back otherwise.  Sitting as much as possible and taking breaks for snacks when I need them at work.  Just laying down at home and nothing else.  I still have pain, but the contractions have been really minimal, which is my main concern.  I'm still on call through tomorrow night so just hope I don't get called out anymore.  I don't need any more money on this paycheck, I really don't!

post #57 of 96

cwill- your hours are crazy! I don't know how you keep up all day.  Its a good thing you don't have insomnia! I'm glad you love your OB. I think there is a lot to be said for trusting your instincts and going with the person right for you. She seems like a very caring person despite whatever she lack communication wise. I see why you stick with :)  

   With the Rh stuff- actually it does have a bearing on ttc.  I had repeated miscarriages which is one of the symptoms of being sensitized with incompatible blood. That's why it through me for a loop so bad. If I am sensitized because my blood mixed when I had the losses, it could seriously affect this baby that I am carrying. DH is definitely getting his blood type confirmed too. I take all my tests this morning- the GD screen, antibody screen, hematacrit and a confirmation of my blood type and rh group.  Wish me luck!

post #58 of 96
Quote:
Originally Posted by JustJenny View Post
 I had repeated miscarriages which is one of the symptoms of being sensitized with incompatible blood. That's why it through me for a loop so bad. If I am sensitized because my blood mixed when I had the losses, it could seriously affect this baby that I am carrying. DH is definitely getting his blood type confirmed too. I take all my tests this morning- the GD screen, antibody screen, hematacrit and a confirmation of my blood type and rh group.  Wish me luck!

 

Oh, I didn't realize you could be sensitized so early in pregnancy!  That's total negligence on the part of your RE then.  Now I'm super angry for you.

 

Good luck with your tests this morning!  I do mine tomorrow.  I've had repeated, regular low blood sugar issues (all while working - shocking!), but when I do the standard fasting and 2 hours post meals testing, everything is ok so I think I will pass the GD screen.

post #59 of 96

cwill- my ttc history is a long one unfortunately. That's why I could of had time to be sensitized for this pregnancy or some of the losses. Particularly my last loss which was difficult. I'm angry too. I will share part of the responsibility because I told him what our blood types are. Or thought they were as it turns out. I just really wish he had not taken my word for it with my history :(  When do you take the GD test?

post #60 of 96

Thanks for the loving reminders to slow down, everyone... iowaorganic, sounds like you understand this lifestyle for sure... and I sure hope you are soon doing better.

 

There was a point not that long ago in my pregnancy when I was perhaps even a tad proud that I was pregnant and out splitting wood and wrangling cows... there are have been times I was  (inwardly) less than sympathetic to a pregnant woman who complained of aching back or hips, because it never happened to me... I'm learning some lessons this time around. I'd like to think our healthy lifestyle protects us from such problems and complaints, but not always, no.

 

The weekend didn't go exactly as planned but we got through it. I ended up not having much to do with the pig, thankfully. Made lunch for a crowd and found that just the walking back and forth, lifting pots, etc was causing cramping again, on top of feeling exhausted and dizzy. I did the dishes and went to bed without even saying goodbye to our guests and didn't really care...

 

But there is so much that can't be let go. Bed rest almost sounds like it would be a relief, to be ordered to rest (and read books and watch movies and knit baby socks!).... but no, I can hardly bear to take sick time even when I am desperately ill, I have a three year old who needs me, a  husband and farm... I would have a *very* hard time with just lying in bed knowing that my family wasn't eating well, possibly dangerous farm work was being undertaken with inadequate help on deck, the dishes and laundry weren't getting done, my paycheck was gone, etc... let alone preparations for baby (well, baby would have socks at least!). 

 

I'm thinking of trying to get in with an OB or CNM at the hospital here just to have established some kind of relationship if there continue to be signs that this baby shouldn't be born at home. Much as I don't want to and am kind of dragging my feet hoping it will all go away... No bleeding since Friday! But the bleeding is a real mystery, if it's not placenta and there's no known cervical "trauma" (sex, internal exam, etc.) neither I nor the OB I work for can think of what it might be. She says there are tests that indicate how high the risk of preterm labor is (cervical length by ultrasound, fetal fibronectin), but as far as I know, they don't say anything about what is causing the problem or what to do about it. Well, I guess if the risk is determined to be high they just say bed rest... not what I want to hear!

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