I am really desprete for any help with our situation. My sleep deprivation has reached a point where my physical and mental health are suffering, and I am not able to be the person and mom I want to be.
I have a four year old and two year old. The two year old sleeps in our room, until recently in our bed. She has always been a frequent waker - every 1-2 hours - since about 3 months of age. It got to the point where she was nursing nearly the entire night. She turned two in August and I got really serious about night weaning. It has been a painful struggle, but we are now consistent in not nursing from about 11pm to 5 am. It has been about two weeks now, and she is still waking up every 1-2 hours. Will this eventually stop, or am I doing something wrong?
I usually nurse her to sleep, or near sleep, and then put her in her crib. When she wakes up she will not stop crying until she is picked up and held. I did try back rubs and singing to her while she was still in her crib, but this has not worked. Generally I put her on my shoulder and walk her around the house. I also sing to her, and shoosh her, pat her back etc. it usually takes no more than 5 minutes to get her back to the crib. Sometimes she is asleep, sometimes awake when I put her back in the crib. As long as she is not crying or getting up I call it good and get back in my bed.
One issue is I am not a person who falls asleep easily. Even when exhausted I seem to lie awake at least 10-15 minutes before falling asleep.So, with getting up every 1-2 hours then struggling back to sleep, I am really getting very little rest. It is taking a serious toll. I find myself angry, emotional, and mentally incapable a lot of the time.
I am really struggling to figure out what if anything I am doing wrong. My older daughter was night weaned at 18 months, and started sleeping pretty much through the night.
I am not willing to do cio. I still listen to crying, but I don't ever leave her to cry, and just cannot even consider doing that. My husband does help when he can, but that dosen't cause her to wake up any less frequently. So, I am still awake as much, but just listening to my husband trying to get her back to sleep. My husband is also sleep deprived, and works long hours outside the home. For this reason I don't want him to completely take over, as it is a real worry to me that he might fall asleep at the wheel on his commute to work.
Thank you if you have bothered to read all this.
Any thoughts or advice are greatly appreciated!