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9 year old daughter issues / bullying and not minding

post #1 of 5
Thread Starter 
My 9 yr old DD has always been the good child, and I mean overly good child. Here lately she has been getting bullied. The teacher said it is bc it's prob bc the kids know she won't do or say anything. We've had conferences and everything addressing that issue at school. It seems as though that is getting a little better.
In the mean time, she was slacking at home. I cut her a break bc I knew she was very upset and trying to do good in school. I completely understand. I keep the standards high, but attainable so she doesnt slack off. She already has a tough time in ready comprehension, but I don't let those be normal grades in other subjects. She isn't doing her chores. She is telling little fibs too. For instance, she asked me if aspirin was a word. I told her what it was. She said she made it up. I told her she prob heard skenobe use it before. A couple of hours later, she asked if we had aspirin for her rose. So she looked it up. I just don't understand. Is this common in 9 yr olds. I don't know what to do.
post #2 of 5

Moved this to Childhood Years :)

post #3 of 5

Hello I saw this little video about bullying and thought it could be useful somehow to watch with her. http://www.jw.org/en/bible-teachings/family/teenagers/whiteboard-animations/beat-a-bully-without-using-your-fists/

Hope been of some help. 

Best,

Drika Reis

post #4 of 5

Sounds normal to me. My middle child is almost 12 and a girl. I didn't go through the same stuff with my oldest son that I have with her. Girls are soooo different. My daughter will lie to me about things that I know the truth about already (little things that don't matter usually) and she is very dramatic and the end of the world if she doesn't get her way in most instances. Yes, it's very hard as they get older IMO. I'm learning with each new day how to handle it and have had friends give me advice over the years as well, which has been helpful. I have several friends with daughters in their late teens, 20's and even early 30's.

post #5 of 5

It may be normal developmental stuff, but I would suggest that, if she's been dealing with chronic stress or anxiety due to her social situation at school, that could cause her to act out.  Personally, I think there is a tendency in "good kids" to not express their feelings as much because they are people pleasers and therefore less likely to share negative feelings.  Both the bullying and the conferences may be affecting her to a greater extent than you realize.  Some counseling sessions with a good child psychologist could help a lot.  Something to consider.

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