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Has anyone ever thought stopping BF cold turkey could be less cruel?

post #1 of 4
Thread Starter 

My daughter is 18 months and still nursing A LOT!

 

Some days I am like AHHH...enough!  But...I always give in and nurse her.  And for the most part, I am still very much okay and love nursing her.  However, I think around two I may not feel so positive about things anymore.


If I try to get rid of one feeding, she screams, is miserable, keeps saying "night night" because she calls my boobs night nights and reaching for them.

 

I, in no way, am weaning but my pediatrician thinks I should wean and just stopping would be easier on her than eliminating a feeding as it's very confusing and seemingly difficult.  If I don't feed her, then at bedtime, nurse her...she acts like a ravenous.  As cruel is just stopping might seem, I almost think it's kinder than removing a feeding here and then another as I feel it sends the signal "Sometimes you get them, sometimes you don't."

 

I have tried the whole don't offer, don't refuse.  It just ends up meaning, if I am not offering, I am CLEARLY refusing.

 

So, I am trying to figure out-- if I were to wean her in a few months...and she is still feeding like she is now...would it be better to just say "Night nights all gone." And I know people are going to say she might self wean but trust me, she is a total boob baby-- would happily nurse well into her mature toddler years I am sure.

 

She has NEVER taken a bottle or a paci...ONLY boobs.  She drinks her ovaltine and milk during the days...but that's from her sippy cup.

 

Nurses to calm down, help her teeth, go to sleep, and still wakes once a night to feed.

 

Thanks for any musings and please don't attack me-- I am just trying to gather some thoughts.  I have read numerous gentle weaning strategies but unfortunately, these don't work for my sweetie pie.

post #2 of 4
Hi SunshineMommy,

I'm sorry to hear you're having a difficult time nursing your toddler. I know how that feels. My 2yo has started nursing frequently again since the birth of DS2. I really struggle with it but I don't think he's ready to wean. It's so great that you are still nursing your Daughter. It sounds like she's not ready to wean either! She's a lucky girl to have a mama still willing to share her body.

Honestly, I think stopping cold turkey would be harder than a gentler approach. You never know, she may start to slow down...

Sorry to cut this short, DS1 just woke up...
post #3 of 4
I found distraction to be really useful to ramp down on feedings. My daughter fed at least 20-30 times a day at that age. She always wanted me and couldn't pass by me without a quick sip. It was just too much with a new born.

I find that how much I enjoy (or don't enjoy) nursing is very dependent on how rested I am.

It is great you have made it to 18 months!! You should be really proud
post #4 of 4

I too had a ravenous boobaholic on my hands. I weaned her from OMG ALL THE TIME (at 18 months) to every 2 hours and then from there decreased a feeding at a time over a period of months until we were down to 1-2 feedings a day at 23 months. Every time I started to feel like I was going bonkers, I would drop another feeding. The transition from "nurse any time you want" to "sometimes Mommy is going to say no" was the hardest part for her. But after a few days she adjusted, and she continued to handle the ensuing frequency reduction pretty well. At 18 months she's old enough to understand that she can't always get what she wants when she wants it, so she should be able to adjust to that applying to nursing as well. Distraction, too, is good, and saying "We'll nurse after we do ___" or "We'll nurse at ___ time" or whatever. 

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