I'm 8 weeks pregnant and struggling with prenatal depression. This pregnancy was planned, but ever since getting a BFP, I've felt really conflicted and scared. My desire to get pregnant with DS (3) was overwhelmingly strong. I always knew (thought?) I wanted at least two kids, but I never felt that *need* this time, tge way I did when we were TTC DS. My love for my son fulfills me so much more than I ever imagined. Anyway- I'm feeling very scared that I won't be able to love this child the way I love DS. It feels like there's not enough room in my heart. I'm afraid I made a terrible mistake getting pregnant because I won't be able to love this baby the way it deserves.
Am I totally insane? Is this the depression talking? I can't really sort out rational thought from hormone-induced craziness at this point. I haven't been able to feel connected to or excited about this pregnancy, and in exploring why, I realized that I'm really scared of not being able to love anyone else the way I love DS- and resentful of anything that would compete for my love for him.
Any kind words are much appreciated. Also feel free to tell me that I've lost my marbles- I can take that. :/