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Why do I feel foolish after a random act of kindness?

post #1 of 14
Thread Starter 

So, last night I was able to escape my house without my two kids for the first time in a loooong time.  I felt fabulous and was in a great mood.  It's getting cold out at night where I am and while I was driving out to run errands I passed a police guy on detail who was obviously just getting set up for the evening/night/whatever.  I was on my way to CVS and while I was there the cop came in looking for handwarmers/gloves/earmuffs or something to keep him warm, but they didn't have any out yet.  I didn't think much of it, but as I was walking out, it was getting really cold out, so it popped into my head to run to the shopping plaza (which was just outside of walking distance for a guy "on duty") and picked up some gloves and a scarf for him. 

It was so easy since I didn't have the kids with me, I just felt like if I had been in that situation it would have meant a lot to be warm.  So I walked up, gave him the stuff and left.

But I feel like kind of a goober for some reason. I guess that I am that insecure? Does anyone else feel foolish when doing something? My DH thinks I'm cuckoo for doing it - we don't have a lot of extra money, and I actually need gloves for myself (but didn't get them). 

Anyway....I keep over analyzing it - it was cold last night, but not freezing...did I go overboard? The dude probably thinks I'm a weirdo.  There are so many people that are in more need of that stuff than him.  What if he's an A-hole? I dunno.  Is this weird??

post #2 of 14

What you have done is an amazing act of kindness, my husband tells me I'm silly for doing things like that but that he loves me for it... I think you are wonderful for doing it... Chin up, life is made of little acts of kindness to mitigate the harsh things going on... I'd guess that the police guy was very grateful for them and will cherish the fact that someone thought of him when very few would!

post #3 of 14
I think it was an absolutely beautiful thing to do too. He will probably never forget it and it probably made him feel so appreciated in his job. Most police feel disliked most of the time.

It made me so happy to read it too! Thank you!
post #4 of 14
I think it was great to do especially if he is a jerk. Maybe it will Napier him to kindness, too. I ink it was great. Now go get ourself some glovesM
post #5 of 14
Quote:
Originally Posted by swede View Post

I think it was great to do especially if he is a jerk. Maybe it will Napier him to kindness, too. I ink it was great. Now go get ourself some glovesM

Napier = inspire. Dumb autocorrect!
post #6 of 14

I also think it was great.  It is easy to over analyze things especially when you have many logical reasons to not spend extra money.  However, I think that these random acts of kindness are what makes the world a better place.  I bet the gesture warmed him to the core and the gloves warmed his hands!  Good for you. 

 

Amy

post #7 of 14
Yay for spreading goodness in the world!! I'm sorry your DH wasn't more encouraging, but it can be awkward in this world of slime and junk to see/give/receive sincere, no-strings-attached kindness. We're so used to hearing about, seeing, and experiencing hateful and selfish behavior that good things throw us off balance and we're not always sure how to react. You did good! You broke out of the isolation we so often find ourselves in and reached out to help someone who needed it. Yay!

I believe in God, so I believe that he asks us to show love to one another. Not just to family and friends, and not just to the poorest and most destitute. I wouldn't get hung up on whether this guy was the neediest you can think of. Instead, I would focus on being thankful for the opportunity to reach out and show love to a fellow human. I've found that once I start responding to these calls for service, I start getting called more. It's really exciting and not something to ignore or feel embarrassed for!
post #8 of 14

I think your a sweet heart! Don't let anyone make you feel weird for being nice....we need more people like you

post #9 of 14
Thread Starter 

Thanks for your responses! I meant to get back in here sooner.  You all definitely made me feel better, lol! I do think it's interesting though that the single biggest obstacle I have to doing things like this is my own fear of looking silly or being laughed at.  I bet I'm not the only one who feels this way.  It's almost absurd, it feels selfish even.  It's weird that doing something nice for someone else can make *me* feel so vulnerable...and that is enough to avoid the act.  Of course it's easy to blame it on something else like time constraints or the amount of "extra work" involved, but I think for me that vulnerability is the real issue.  So, now that I know that, it's something to work on :D

 

...i guess both for myself and also hoping that i don't pass the insecurities onto my kids!

post #10 of 14

That was very thoughtful of you, thanks for sharing :thumb

 

( I agree with Annlea, don't let anyone make you feel bad for doing something nice for someone)

post #11 of 14
Quote:
Originally Posted by swede View Post

I think it was great to do especially if he is a jerk. Maybe it will Napier him to kindness, too. I ink it was great. Now go get ourself some glovesM


 I agree.  Very sweet thing to do.

 

I once paid for the woman in line behind me at a thrift store.  The lines were long because the woman two people in front of me was arguing something from a return.  Then the woman in front of my was short about 3 cents and looking in her purse and it took a while.  I didn't have any cash with me so I couldn't help her.

 

However the woman behind me was buying a hideous lamp and just kept her mouth running about people not planning ahead, it taking so long, just hurry up, she doesn't have all day, blah blah blah.  Seeing her impatience only made me realize just how trivial it was to lose 8 or 10 minutes waiting in line.  (my kids were happy, we were warm, etc. ) so I whispered and asked the cashier to charge an extra $20 to my cc in hopes it would cover her ugly lamp.  I too was feeling foolish about helping, but the woman was such a downer- she needed to see that most people are good and kind and we were all waiting together.

 

Then I scooted out of there fast as I could so I didn't see her reaction!

post #12 of 14
Aww! You are awesome! My dh sometimes does traffic details for our town, and it can get downright bitter at night in the winter standing out there. I know that he would have been incredibly touched by such kindness. <3
post #13 of 14
Thread Starter 

Thanks :love  It's funny, I was the recipient of my own random act of kindness the other night....feeling silly about it IS silly.  I hope to make this a routine part of our lives now :wink

post #14 of 14

Never feel bad about random acts of kindness! You helped someone, and it doesn't matter if he might have been an a**hole or not. Even a**holes need love sometimes. You thought of an other person before yourself and that takes kindness and love. There is no reason to feel bad. It saved this man times and some money and I'm willing to bet he may give fewer tickets in the coming days to pass on the kindness. :D

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