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Truth or Dare: a poll

post #1 of 8
Thread Starter 

Vote on your thoughts about Truth or Dare. 

 

I removed the botched poll. The basic questions were: 

 

  • Did you play truth or dare as a kid and, if so, did you feel like it was a positive or negative experience? 
  • Would you "let" your child play this game? 
post #2 of 8
It wouldn't let me choose multiple options, but I did play as a teen and don't remember any major drama-though there sure was potential in retrospect! We actually play with the kids (12 & 5) sometimes. As much as it weirded me out at first I play along in the hopes of offering guidance for future situations with friends and such. It's opened up some good discussions with dd12, and much silliness with dd5. smile.gif
post #3 of 8

The problem with this question is "let." When I was a kid, this was a game played when adults weren't looking. Based on what I've seen as a parent, I think it pretty much the same. I've never heard a parent say "hey, let's play truth of dare!" So really, do any of us "let" our kids play this game? I wouldn't punish a kid for playing it but they'd have to make amends for anything stupid they did. I didn't play this game as a kid because it made me uncomfortable. I know my eldest has been in situations where it was played and she prefers to opt out for the same reason. My DS, I'm sure they dare each other all the time but I wouldn't guess they care so much about the truth part and they don't seem to ever feel pressured within their little group.

post #4 of 8
Thread Starter 

Ok, I removed the poll because it won't let me edit for multiple answers. The basic questions are above. Mainly I wanted to know what our own experiences were with this game and to see how my fellow gentle parents feel about our own kids playing this. 

 

I remember playing but it wasn't a big part of my youth. I remember it as a phase, probably around the same age as my DC is now (12). My own DC has played a few times. It didn't occur to me to question this game until recently.  

post #5 of 8
I remember playing, but I had a good healthy sense of boundaries and would simply say no, game or no game, if something went beyond my boundaries. I don't care how much kids said, "You have to! You were dared! You can't back out!"

Kids play this without their parents knowing. I've told my daughter that I said "no" frequently to truth questions and dared, and kids tried to pressure me to do things that were outside my boundaries, and I said no and refused, and there were no lasting effects from that. I hope she knows she can do the same. And she'll always have a cell phone at any party so she can call me at any time to bail because "she isn't feeling well."
post #6 of 8
I played as a kid and my dd has played it also. We did some off the wall, mildly inappropriate things while playing but these weren't things we didn't do from time to time when together anyways. Kids sometimes get up to no good when in groups so I wouldn't tell dd she shouldn't play this game.
post #7 of 8

I played as a child and teen and there were some negative things. I discouraged my kids from playing, but agree that this is a game that kids play when parents aren't watching, so "letting" isn't the right verb.  My kids are past this stage now -- their peers have moved on to drinking and sex.

 

Teaching our kids to set boundaries and to NOT care what there peers think is one of think are two of the more important lessons that we can give them. Anything we say that strengthens those things are good, anything that weakens them are not so good.

 

I also think that to some degree, this whole teen board is about how to parent past the stage where you let or don't let your kid do things. There is a tremendous amount that we really cannot control in the teen years. We don't know their friends' parents the way we when they were young. They spend more time away from home with varying levels of supervision. What passes for "normal" behavior for their peers is all over the place. Parenting now is more about how we TALK to them about these issues. The real choices are up to them.

post #8 of 8

I played it, didn't love it, never did anything too stupid or said too much, though…..

 

I lectured my kids on how I thought it was a stupid game but I certainly did not try to forbid it; I am pretty sure they played it anyways.  At least I had my say.

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