I responded to the when to date thread but think I need a little more support on this topic.
Xdh is pretty much blackmailing me right now. He says that I have to wait 6 months to let my kids even meet my new dp. As I mentioned in a previous thread I am not planning on my kids meeting the dp anytime soon anyhow, we have been dating 1 month. But xdh has taken it to the next level. He says I need to sign a written statement that I will not introduce and dp to the kids, if I do not then he will no longer pay me on time (child support and alimony) and he will not do anything as far as planning parenting time or take the kids anytime I ask for. We do not have any set parenting schedule, the wording is 1 weekday/night, 3 hours one weeknight and every other saturday over night. What it has been has been usually tuesday weekday/night and 1 weekend either friday or saturday overnight every week, but his schedule varies due to all his vacations so that hasn't even been consistant since mid october.
Right now xdh pays the state and the state pays me. He isn't getting garnished. That could be an option to ensure I actually am getting paid. Right now he is pretty much my only source of income while I am in college. I do not have a large savings. I have less than one months worth. For december he decided to pay me late because I wouldn't let him come over one evening to see the kids at 7:30pm because I said it was too late and almost bedtime. So he didn't pay support until the 1st of the month and it is suppose to be in the states hands by the 1st. I will be lucky if it gets there tomorrow. The process is long and usually take 5-7 business days from him actually paying it to it being in my account.
My dp is really upset and I am really angry. In this process I have hurt dp's feelings because I am reacting to xdh's threats and starting to get freaked out and scared I may lose my source of income. I have no family support. I try to get a babysitter for one night and no one can do it. I am pretty much on my own emotionally and have no help other than xdh with the kids.
I know that if it wasn't dp it will be someone else down the road. Granted once I am done with school and making my own money, xdh's threats will be less of an issue,, but should I stand up to him on this, now, or should i comply and go along with it in order to ensure my financial security? I am at a loss and hate hate hate feeling like this especially with the holidays approaching.