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Mothering › Groups › August 2014 Due Date Club › Discussions › How are you staying sane?

How are you staying sane?

post #1 of 20
Thread Starter 
This is my first pregnancy and I'm going absolutely crazy trying not to think of all the things that could go wrong. I'm only about 4+4 along and I don't have m/s yet--just highly irrational emotional, tender breasts, some cramping, and am only in the mood to eat bitter things (not really a craving).

How are you staying sane? I'm trying to read, do some work, but I can't seem to think straight.
post #2 of 20
This is my 11th pregnancy(7th baby) and I'm good until I go to bed at night. I'm busy enough during the day that I don't spend much time worrying. Then at night, I lay there thinking too much. I'm freaked out by the logistics of working in a surprise baby. Needing more room in my house, a bigger car.....having gotten rid of every stitch of maternity AND baby clothing I own.....and I do worry about things going wrong too. I had just gotten out of that pregnancy/newborn headspace, so I'm feeling really out of sorts finding myself thrust back there. Not much help am I ? wink1.gif
post #3 of 20
Thread Starter 
In the very least, I'm glad I'm not the only one! smile.gif thanks!
post #4 of 20
Thread Starter 
Btw--wowza! I just re-read your post! Props to you, you must enlighten the rest of us on pregnancy and parenting tips!
post #5 of 20
smile.gif
post #6 of 20

We just took a weekend trip to keep occupied. There we took long walks for sightseeing which had me yawning every 10 seconds (dang I am tired), delicious dinners (which made me feel like I was about to throw up after 10 bites) and we saw a show (Lion King, no complaints here). I think I'll use the next days while I am still fairly able to enter my kitchen to prepare and freeze some meals. Cooking relaxes me, so it helps not to obsess too much.

post #7 of 20

I'm right there with ya! This is my first pregnancy and I'm already starting to drive myself crazy!  I'm so so worried about something bad happening.  I just keep calling my mom and asking ridiculous questions.  She's been very comforting so far and I'm so lucky to have her.  My poor husband on the other hand just looks like a deer in headlights when I start to worry.  I just try to take deep breaths when my thoughts get overwhelming and sit down to crochet or distract myself with a chore...so far so good!

post #8 of 20

I will feel more relaxed when I am passed 8 weeks... (10 more days!)  My m/c was at 8 weeks.  I feel like my m/c (first pregnancy) had to do with things I did, though, ignorant/ naive to how to care for my pregnant body at the time.  (I dont beat myself up with blame, but I do feel like my actions could very well have caused it.)  It helps to remind myself that I am taking very good care of myself and I am much healthier than I have ever been.  I don't get very sick, and my symptoms come and go (it was the same with my DD's pregnancy).  So, I am relieved when symptoms come.  Whenever I get a worry, I make myself an herbal infusion of red clover and nettle as a way to give my pregnant self a nourishing hug.  I also daydream about the summer of being pregnant and make plans accordingly and keep a very optimistic vision for the future with this babe.  That is what helps me. :)

post #9 of 20
Quote:
Originally Posted by SisterThyme View Post

This is my 11th pregnancy(7th baby) and I'm good until I go to bed at night. I'm busy enough during the day that I don't spend much time worrying. Then at night, I lay there thinking too much. I'm freaked out by the logistics of working in a surprise baby. Needing more room in my house, a bigger car.....having gotten rid of every stitch of maternity AND baby clothing I own.....and I do worry about things going wrong too. I had just gotten out of that pregnancy/newborn headspace, so I'm feeling really out of sorts finding myself thrust back there. Not much help am I ? wink1.gif

 

i did not get rid of all my maternity clothes quite yet.  i lent them out to a friend.  but she's returned some already.  i did just pull out all my NON-PREGNANT clothes for the first time in years i'm back at my 6P size which is obviously my body's call to 'knock me up now'.

we're gonna need a bigger car.  if it's a girl, the house is gonna be too small too.  and i've been slacking on keeping up w/ baby clothes b/c i thought this was certainly my last for, well, 5 years at least!!!  i'm a little overwhelmed w/ the logistics of 6 kids!!!  5 always was my goal, and seemed manageable, but somehow 6 seems so hard!!!

i also have been doing the late night whirring mind insanity.  i've had 2 miscarriages so that is scary to me (one at this stage, and one at 8 weeks), and also found myself super emotional, and exhausted.

that's why i come here!  if i'm gonna feel a little crazy, i'd rather do it among other women suffering a similar crazy!!!  

post #10 of 20
I was a ball of worry with my first. This one, I'm just so sure of it, I don't worry. With my first I basically lived in my due date club, posted endlessly. Then once we had shared the news, all I could talk about was the baby. I read a dozen pregnancy books from cover to cover, some of them twice. I found all that engagement, especially the books, to be a real stress reliever. The more I knew about everything, the less I worried. And once you reach about week 8, the odds are overwhelmingly in your favor...
post #11 of 20
Thread Starter 
Jessica, that's awesome! I'll have to start reading more. Any suggestions?

Abigail, I totally understand with DH. He's got a positive outlook though! When did you tell your mom? We're planning to wait until Christmas.

Frederike--a trip sound like a good idea! How was the lion king? I've always wanted to see it. Cooking is awesome too--any good freezer meal ideas? Or tips? I haven't done much freezing.

Mama, so sorry about your m/c. Those are great tips you gave. A friend of mine told me to think about your body nourishing the baby.

I'm trying to remember just how many babies are born, and at the same time how many people recover from a m/c and go on to have happy healthy babies.
post #12 of 20

Although my first pregnancy (with my son) was perfect, I have suffered two miscarriages this year in trying to get a second baby, and now I'm pregnant again and definitely feeling pretty crazy already.  I told myself I would avoid the stress next time I was pregnant and just stay in the moment and be at peace with whatever happens.  That's proving pretty hard in practice, though.  

 

Sooo...I just try to not think about it and stay busy.  Keep my fitness and exercise up while I'm feeling well.   I have a toddler to play with, so it does help keep my mind off things.  

 

Try not to stress, though.  I know it's easier said then done. :)

post #13 of 20
Thread Starter 
Wow, so sorry for your losses OtherSoul. But awesome that you have a toddler. Thank you for your advice! I think I've finally calmed down, especially as symptoms increase. I've kept myself busy with work and crafts, etc. it's been good!
post #14 of 20
I'm going a little crazy. Worried about miscarriage. All seems fine. I'm at 5w1d so have a long road ahead. I am exercising as much as I can to keep my mind off this. I've had one normal pregnancy and this is my 2nd.

It helps to read others have worries too. Time to distract myself until my family gets home!

Hugs everyone!
post #15 of 20

I am 5.3 and would love to exercise to cope with my anxiety.  People told me not to!  I wonder if it would be okay.   I was in a regular routine previous to this and in great shape.  

post #16 of 20

exercise away, but be aware of your body and don't push it.  

 

before 5 kids, i loved exercise as release/endorphins... but i was doing blogilates and got tired of my 2 year old laying under me when i was trying to hold really intense positions.....

 

and i still do a lot, but pacing it w/ little people is hard.  sledding this weekend was our big adventure.  and hiking up a 300 foot snow covered hill carrying a 2 year old is quite the workout!!!

post #17 of 20
I'm in the same boat and this is my sixth pregnancy (hopefully fifth child). We decided to try for another one a couple of weeks ago and I have been endlessly obsessing since then. What if I m/c? What if this baby has horrible eczema like DD3? How can I prevent it? omg, what if she has a heart defect like DD2 (darn, I said "she". Next to healthy baby, I would really like another boy smile.gif)? What if he's missing a kidney or has Aspergers like DS? Or maybe he/she will be perfectly healthy like DD1 (and all of them now)? Sorry, I'm not much help. And the not being able to focus - that's pregnancy brain. I want to just read and enjoy my fantasy novels, but it's hard. I also exercise - jogging 4-5 days a week for 30-40 minutes. I jogged the first 8 weeks of DD3's pregnancy. It really helped keep my mind off of m/c. That and the early (7 week) ultrasound with a heartbeat.
post #18 of 20
Quote:
Originally Posted by SisterThyme View Post

This is my 11th pregnancy(7th baby) and I'm good until I go to bed at night. I'm busy enough during the day that I don't spend much time worrying. Then at night, I lay there thinking too much. I'm freaked out by the logistics of working in a surprise baby. Needing more room in my house, a bigger car.....having gotten rid of every stitch of maternity AND baby clothing I own.....and I do worry about things going wrong too. I had just gotten out of that pregnancy/newborn headspace, so I'm feeling really out of sorts finding myself thrust back there. Not much help am I ? wink1.gif

 

Congrats!I gave away my maternity clothes about 6mos ago. My dd has all my baby clothes (I have 2yo and 1yo grandsons). I know what you mean about headspace, too! For me, I am choosing to be happy and excited; logistics will work themselves out. My dh ... he's still working on it ;)

Quote:
Originally Posted by HouseofPeace View Post
 

 

i did not get rid of all my maternity clothes quite yet.  i lent them out to a friend.  but she's returned some already.  i did just pull out all my NON-PREGNANT clothes for the first time in years i'm back at my 6P size which is obviously my body's call to 'knock me up now'.

we're gonna need a bigger car.  if it's a girl, the house is gonna be too small too.  and i've been slacking on keeping up w/ baby clothes b/c i thought this was certainly my last for, well, 5 years at least!!!  i'm a little overwhelmed w/ the logistics of 6 kids!!!  5 always was my goal, and seemed manageable, but somehow 6 seems so hard!!!

i also have been doing the late night whirring mind insanity.  i've had 2 miscarriages so that is scary to me (one at this stage, and one at 8 weeks), and also found myself super emotional, and exhausted.

that's why i come here!  if i'm gonna feel a little crazy, i'd rather do it among other women suffering a similar crazy!!!  

I'm glad to see so many 'moms of many' on here! IKWYM about 'knock me up now' body calls. My dd prayed that she would lose all her baby weight before she got pg again. She did, by two months! Hers are exactly 12 mos apart. 

post #19 of 20

Yep, I was in the best shape of my adult life when I got pregnant this time, lol.  Why do you think that happens so much?  Is it because of an increased level of health that just summons pregnancy?

 

Also gave away my maternity clothes.  >.<

post #20 of 20
I gave away pretty much everything about 8 years ago.

8th pregnancy, and hopefully 2nd child.

One m/c as a teen (was excited at the time but now I know dodged a bullet). Then my kiddo who is now 13 smile.gif Then 3 m/c in the second year of trying. Followed 2.5 years of avoiding (was devastated). Then tried again. Two more m/c. All long stories.

But now it's 3 years out from my last and I'm feeling pretty cautiously optimistic. Energetically it feels different.

Just crossing my fingers and trying to banish scared thoughts. Visualizing a giant belly this summer and a wee one this fall.
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