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6 year old boy

post #1 of 3
Thread Starter 
My husband and I have a 6 yo boy who is an only child. My hubs has been a SAHD from 4mos old. My son has always had a preference for me even though he and his dad are strongly bonded. These last few weeks my son has been beside himself if he is away from me. He also saves most things I touch...bits if food, papers, logos have to stay where I put them...etc. He is at a new school fie 1st grade and slowly making friends. He is a sensitive guy who doesn't plunge into things, but rather takes in the big picture and figures out the whole deal and then gets involved. Today, hubs and I were helping at school with a class art project. My son wanted to keep the chair that I touched with him all day and then absolutely lost it when hubs and I needed to leave school. We always give him advanced notice and timelines so it wasn't a surprise. These last few weeks he's been ridiculously attached to me and absolutely miserable when we are apart. His teacher saw it happen today and was awesome with helping the best she could. She says she sees these types of behaviors when a child is about to go through a big life development change. My heart is breaking because I love my bub, but nothing is working to help him be more independent when I am around. Any advice would be appreciated!
post #2 of 3

Oh, my heart goes out to you and your boy! I, too, have a 6 year old boy, only child. We are seldom apart. I homeschool him, have always stayed at home with him (no outside job is what I mean). He goes through times when he clings so much to me I freak out a little! He is very independent, but at times just will not let me go physically. Like at night when i tuck him in, sometimes he grabs hold of me and says, "Mommy, don't leave me, don't leave me!" It warms and breaks my heart a little at the same time, if you know what I mean :)

 

My first thought in reading your post, though, was the possibility of some sort of trauma he has recently experienced? He's in first grade, so I assume he went through kindergarten with no major separation issues?

 

On the other hand, if the teacher says she has seen similar things in other students over the years, maybe just go with her gut? Unless in your heart you feel like something else might be going on? Have you tried asking him what is going on inside his head when he does this?

post #3 of 3
Quote:
 She says she sees these types of behaviors when a child is about to go through a big life development change.

IS there a big change that your son is about to go through?  I can understand that he's still adjusting to the new school, but that's a big change that's past, that he's assimilating, not a new change he's bracing for.

 

He sounds anxious to me.  My son has been almost like this sometimes, and it's always been at times when I was very stressed by things that had nothing to do with him (for example, having a lot of migraines, or upset about being betrayed by a friend) and this apparently was his way of expressing his worry that all was not well with me.  I was a chronically anxious child, and the times when I worried particularly about being apart from my parents were when I had encountered (from someone else's experience, TV, or my own wild imagination) a very disturbing idea of something that might happen either to my parent or to me if I were away from my parents' protection.  So it might be useful to evaluate what could be worrying your son--even if it seems unrelated, this might be the way he's expressing it.

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