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Do you do the whole Santa Claus thing?

post #1 of 83
Thread Starter 

""We keep the Santa myth going in this house. My older one figured it out at some point but had such fun with it and likes to help the little one write notes for Santa and talk about Santa. We don't do the "he keeps a list of nice kids and naughty kids and naughty kids get coal" thing. We say Santa loves all children. But we do it.

But I know a lot of parents don't, for a variety of reasons. What do you do in your house?

post #2 of 83
We did Santa ( no naughty lists and he brings only 1 gift) but I decided from the start that I would be honest when DD asked for the truth. Well, that happened last night---DD is 6. She was totally fine about the whole thing but I'm a little sad and DH is very sad too, especially since he wanted more kiddos and she's our only and growing so fast. Bit of a tough day for the grown-ups in our house. DD is just as excited about the holidays though.
post #3 of 83
Thread Starter 
Ha! This is so why we had a second, and why they're 7 years apart! LOL orngbiggrin.gif

(She was also going to be an only.)
post #4 of 83
No santa here. I had big time trust issues with my parents after discovering that most of the fun stuff in childhood was a lie and fabrication. (santa, easter bunny, tooth fairy) We traveled when the kids were small to avoid the holiday stuff and then we invented our own quiet solstice thing that we still do with them as teens.
post #5 of 83
When I was a kid, I was very shy, and had a hard time with the other kids at school. I don't remember how old I was, but I still believed in Santa at an age when other kids didn't. I vividly remember getting teased about it at school, and insisting that Santa MUST be real, because there was no way my mother would EVER lie to me. Then I got home from school, and my mom had to tell me the truth. I was devastated; my mom still thinks I overreacted. greensad.gif

When my older kids were little, we didn't boycott Santa (didn't avoid movies, books, or decorations with Santa, and we even took them to see Santa at the mall and labeled our gifts to them as being "from Santa"), but we made it clear that Santa was just a game. It was a fun thing that we enjoyed, but not any more real than Mickey Mouse or Cinderella. It worked for us, and none of our older kids seemed the least upset by the way we did things.

But then my middle daughter (our fifth child) came along. She would get very upset at any suggestion that Santa was not real. She is almost 9, and still insists that Santa is absolutely real, and will NOT hear otherwise. And I kind of feel like it would be just as upsetting to her if I took that away as it was for me to find out that my mother had "lied" to me. So we have a compromise. She's not allowed to get upset that the older kids don't believe, but no one is allowed to try to convince her that Santa isn't real. It's sort of live and let live.

The only complication is that now our youngest two take for granted that Santa IS real in much the same way that the oldest four took for granted that he isn't. I never argue with them or try to convince them Santa isn't real. If they outright ask me, I say that I don't believe, but it's fine if they do. Mostly they don't ask me. I guess it's good that my kids have the strength of their convictions, and feel confident enough to believe even when half of their family doesn't.

That said, I do insist to all of the kids that Daddy is the tooth fairy. I tell them that he puts on a tutu, ballet slippers, and wings, and he waves his magic wand to become teeny tiny when he collects their teeth. I even have photographic evidence! And I swear that he's got a magic castle full of children's teeth hidden away where they can't see it. Not a one of them believes me. :P
post #6 of 83

We don't plan on doing it, but there is a lot of Santa centered stuff out there. DS is already asking questions about it, just from information he has gleaned from outside sources. Gah! I like the idea of not reinforcing the belief, but allowing kids to think how they please.

post #7 of 83

We don't do it.  I don't like that the whole "magic" is centered around consumerism.  My older kids are instructed not to let out the secret to other kids because it could hurt their feelings (shaking up the belief system!), and my littlest one is still blissfully unaware of the whole charade :)

post #8 of 83
My girls are 32 months and 4 months so I'm not super experienced with Santa stuff yet. We don't plan on making a big deal about it. A gift from mom and dad and a gift from Santa for each kiddo. I'm generally a bit picky about toys so if there's something one of them wants at some point with all their heart that I cringe at... Well that can be from Santa lol. We won't do elf on the shelf or naughty/nice or anything and keep things small and budget friendly. I like Santa as sort of a background character but he's not going to be a big deal if I can manage it smile.gif
Edited for the run-on sentence from hell wink1.gif
post #9 of 83
I wrote a whole article on why my kid never believed in Santa: http://articles.earthlingshandbook.org/2013/09/25/why-my-kid-never-believed-in-santa-claus/

Basically, we have 3 reasons:

We didn't like the idea of feeling like we were lying. The inadvisability of doing so was obvious by the time our son was 2 because he's a very analytical type who wants to know all about how things like magic tricks and special effects work--can't fool him!

We wanted him to understand that holiday "magic" is something we make for each other, which takes some effort and money--not something that comes out of thin air.

I wanted to teach him to believe in God, and I feared this could be undermined by also teaching him to believe in other supernatural entities that don't exist.

It's worked out really well, but we have learned that it's crucial to remind him every year before Thanksgiving that he needs to be tolerant of those who believe and not spoil it for them!
post #10 of 83
It's really time for me to decide this! Lol... Santa is fun but at the same time it would feel really strange to lie to my kid! I'm always trying to explain the world, you know? Hmm
post #11 of 83
I never liked the lying thing. So, mostly I've avoided the topic. I simply say, "Well, I've never seen anyone come down the chimney. I don't see how that would be possible." Or, "I've heard that, but I'm not sure if I believe that." Or, whatever else is appropriate. The kids usually fill me in on what somebody else tells them and then I turn it back on them with a "What do you think?" I don't want to lie to them and I don't want to take away a need they may have to believe (like michelleepotter's middle daughter).

So, I just let them tell me. It's worked so far. DS at 6 has asked some pointed questions this year which I've answered truthfully. "But, reindeer don't fly mom. How is that possible?" "You're right honey. Reindeer don't fly. I don't see how the whole thing is possible." But, he hasn't yet followed up with any "gotcha" questions. But, I remember just figuring it out on my own and continuing to live the dream for quite awhile. My sister filled my niece in at 7 with the whole truth. She took it and then the next year was all in and believing and writing letters and everything and we all just accepted it and ran with it. I've seen this with other kids, too. So, I think you just let kids follow their own path on this subject and they'll do what they need to do.
post #12 of 83

We have mostly avoided the Santa thing at our house. The kids believe so I don't crush their spirits by saying anything. We decided Santa only brings stockings. Everything else comes from mom & dad. We decided it that way so they would know mom and dad works/worked hard to afford the things they get.

post #13 of 83

Nope... he's a nice character in stories, like Frosty and Rudolph. Jesus is the star of Christmas, and Daddy works hard to provide us with the gifts they get, so they need to be appreciated and respected. Being good doesn't magically get you a wish list full of crap, just like lean years when we can't afford much don't mean they were on some naughty list and therefore didn't get stuff as cool as what "santa" got their friends.

post #14 of 83

No. I don't want to lie. At 5, he hears a lot about it at school, but the way we explain it is that "Santa is the spirit of giving." And then we turn the focus of the conversation on the importance of giving. 

post #15 of 83

Yes, it's fun. I don't normally "lie" to my kids, but this is one area I don't mind. I do however only have a single gift from Santa. The kids know the others are from mom and dad.

post #16 of 83
Nope. We're Jewish. When my now-four-year-old saw Santa last year he thought it was Moses because of the beard. We will be teaching him not to spoil it for his cousins that do celebrate Christmas.
post #17 of 83
Thread Starter 
Originally Posted by arebeewhy View Post

Nope. We're Jewish. When my now-four-year-old saw Santa last year he thought it was Moses because of the beard. We will be teaching him not to spoil it for his cousins that do celebrate Christmas.

Little kids are so cute! That's adorable.
post #18 of 83

We do Santa at our house. With our first, I was torn on whether or not we should, but DH thought it would be fun, etc. So, there is a Santa at our house... until there isn't. We don't do Elf on the Shelf though.

post #19 of 83
Yes we do the whole Santa thing. I had a wonderful experience believing as a child, one of my happiest memories. I came to the conclusion on my own when I was 8 that he wasn't real, but wasn't devastated. After that I had fun instilling the belief in my younger siblings. My oldest is 6 1/2 and very much believes. I love seeing her eyes light up when she gets her return letter from Santa in the mail.
post #20 of 83
Thread Starter 
Originally Posted by erinmattsmom88 View Post

We do Santa at our house. With our first, I was torn on whether or not we should, but DH thought it would be fun, etc. So, there is a Santa at our house... until there isn't. We don't do Elf on the Shelf though.

I should TOTALLY do a thread on Elf on the Shelf! I think it's pretty creepy. I'm on it!
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