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Thoughts on circumcision?

post #1 of 20
Thread Starter 

Hi Ladies!

 

This is my first pregnancy so I'm finding myself researching every little thing I can think of.  One of those things is whether or not to circumcise if baby is a boy.  All of my family and friends who have had baby boys have chosen to circumcise without thinking twice about it.  I'm leaning towards not choosing it but was hoping to get some thoughts and opinions from experienced moms and why you made the decision to do it or not.

 

Thanks so much!! :-)

post #2 of 20
I regret leaving it up to my ex. My son developed adhesions. It was painful and traumatic when the skin eventually separated. There is not enough reasons out there to make it worth it, in my opinion.

I grew up with a family where it's just what you did. It's "cleaner" and such. I don't know, girls have plenty of folds they have to learn to clean. You hear about female circumcision and people are horrified. Why should it be any different? My husband knows it's not happening if we have a boy. He's nervous about It. But I promised that if we have a boy and at some point he says he wants it I would pay for it and wait on him hand and foot. You can do it later, you can't put it back on after the fact. And it's not as "weird" as it used to be. Last I heard (and I could be off) it was 40% of little boys aren't circ'd. When my son was born it was 10%.

Just my point of view. There is a lot of information out there about it.
post #3 of 20
We left our first son (9) intact, and if this one is a boy we'll do the same again. No great reason beyond my husband's culture just doesn't DO that and because the idea of cutting something off of my son's penis didn't sit right with me.

Both my husband and son are uncut, neither has had any problems because of it. Then again, they/I've never known different.
post #4 of 20

We left our son intact...my husband is circumcised.   My husband researched it himself and feels regret that his mother did it to him so we left our boy whole.

post #5 of 20

my husband was radically pro-circ when we were pregnant w/ our first.  until something changed (i never knew what) and he decided it wasn't happening at 7 months into the pregnancy.  my son is almost 8, and we've never regretted it.  my 2nd son is also uncircumcised, and no second thoughts.

 

i'll echo some thoughts above, i have 2 boys and 3 girls and a tiny flap of foreskin is NOTHING next to the labyrinth of labial folds on little girls!

 

my sisters (nurses all) and my family were very shocked we took this dangerous/unclean route. but after my son/birth, my sister worked as a NICU nurse and was SHOCKED at the brutality of circumcision in the unit.  So for her son, she opted to circumcise, but a full week after birth.  and she couldn't stay present, but refused to leave for long (her story was that they would line up baby boys and just go down the row cutting off foreskins w/out any treatments and the boys would pass out from shock, which was used as proof that 'they didn't really feel it b/c they just fell right asleep afterwards'- she was not agreeing w/ this method) and nursed him immediately afterwards.  this worked well for her- she enjoyed having the full week to establish nursing and know her son before doing something traumatic to him and that gave her peace about it b/c he was the same baby afterwards, and she knew him well enough to know that. 

 

my in-laws had later come to regret circumcising their sons, so we had their full support.  


 

post #6 of 20

I left my son intact and happy I did. This is an issue close to my heart. I hate to see baby boys circumcised. I recommend doing lots of research and watching a video if you are leaning toward it. On the west coast of the US over 50% of boys are left intact.

 

His body, his choice.

 

Circumcision is on it's way out in the U.S.A.

post #7 of 20
I let hubby be in charge with our first boys and they are circ'ed. If I could undo it I would. My youngest boy is intact. Hubby and I were on the same page by the time of his birth. It was a process but after watching the videos he felt like that was a lot for a newborn to go through and too risky in the absence of medical necessity.
post #8 of 20

I am 100% against it. If it is something he wants when he is old enough, then it is his body. Otherwise I believe it is abuse to force that on someone who can't say no.

post #9 of 20

We circumcised my first son without really thinking about it and I regret it.  With my second son, hubby was on the fence because he is circ'd but I didn't want to.   However, the birth center we used showed a video about circumcision as part of their birth course and afterwards my husband was decided that we would NOT circumcise and would not do it again.  Once you research and see what is done, you will really think twice because there is no medical need to circumcise.  

post #10 of 20

A little tongue-in cheek here but one way I shut my husband up was with this - Circumcision makes the average penis 13% smaller.  I'm not hung up on size but so many men are.  I figure use it to my (and our future little ones) advantage.

post #11 of 20
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Johanna View Post
 

A little tongue-in cheek here but one way I shut my husband up was with this - Circumcision makes the average penis 13% smaller.  I'm not hung up on size but so many men are.  I figure use it to my (and our future little ones) advantage.

Hahah, very clever!

post #12 of 20
Thread Starter 

Thank you ladies!  I will definitely be researching it more. :-)

post #13 of 20
The Penn & Teller video on circumcision helped my DH.
post #14 of 20
We only have girls so far, but both believe strongly against circumcision.
post #15 of 20
hammer.gif <=== This is "present" me smacking "past" me.

We had our DS circumcised. DH is and, at the time, I guess I just didn't really worry about it. I felt that he wouldn't remember it and I'd want to be circumcised if I was a boy. That is NOT how I feel now. I actually went with my son to hold his hands and whisper to him while they did the procedure. The doctor was very surprised that I asked to be with him. I think it was a first for her. So many people must just hand them over and get them back altered. greensad.gif I haven't seen any of the aforementioned videos, but it wasn't all that awful in my experience. Maybe that's because I was there? They did numb the area first. The contraption they used was a little unsettling as was the care afterward.

I am not advocating for circumcision and if my baby is a boy, I will NOT have him circumcised. I feel bad about altering DS and I will not hurt a perfectly beautiful child again unless medically necessary (DD2 had open heart surgery).
post #16 of 20

My husband is not circumcised and has never had a problem from it. We live in Canada where it is much less common. I think, there are no real advantages and lots of potential risks. If he wants it done he can always have it done later. I think it's more cosmetic than anything. we kept our son intact and would make the same decision with any other sons. It has been a total non issue re: hygeiene, etc. It's much more work to be changing dressings and such with a newborn than to just leave it alone. 

post #17 of 20
Quote:
Originally Posted by HouseofPeace View Post

 

my sisters (nurses all) and my family were very shocked we took this dangerous/unclean route. but after my son/birth, my sister worked as a NICU nurse and was SHOCKED at the brutality of circumcision in the unit.  So for her son, she opted to circumcise, but a full week after birth.  and she couldn't stay present, but refused to leave for long (her story was that they would line up baby boys and just go down the row cutting off foreskins w/out any treatments and the boys would pass out from shock, which was used as proof that 'they didn't really feel it b/c they just fell right asleep afterwards'- she was not agreeing w/ this method) and nursed him immediately afterwards.  this worked well for her- she enjoyed having the full week to establish nursing and know her son before doing something traumatic to him and that gave her peace about it b/c he was the same baby afterwards, and she knew him well enough to know that. 

Ohh honey you just made my stomach turn!!! bigeyes.gif  How can those doctors DO such a thing?! Those poor babies!!!

 

I left my boys intact at first - my ex was adamant about it, he had serious size insecurities and wanted them to have their "full package". Fine with me, as I am ALL FOR INTACT, and if this latest bundle is a boy, I will not circ.

 

But it wasn't to stay that way for us - DS1 was born with hypospadias (where the foreskin doesn't completely encircle the glans, and the opening of the urethra falls underneath the tip), and DS2 was born with a foreskin that was too tight to retract, so urine would get trapped underneath and cause horribly painful infections. They both suffered multiple infections - it sucked royally!!! I ended up having to get them both circ'ed and DS1's hypospadias repaired when they were older, ages 4 & 19 mos. I HATED to do it, but for them it was actually necessary. 

 

A wonderful doctor at Children's Hospital did it, back-to-back surgeries where both of them were under full anesthesia, so the only pain was during recovery. DS2 went first, as his was less complicated - when he was in recovery, the only thing they said they could give him for pain was oxycodone, but I refused it as I didn't think that drug was appropriate for a 19mo! Fortunately I had brought my Hyland's Bumps & Bruises tablets and some Calms Forte & Rescue Remedy - after doses of each of those, he settled down and fell asleep in my arms. The doctor came in and his jaw literally dropped seeing how peaceful he was - he was amazed the homeopathy was so effective! DS1 had a tougher time, since they had to use his foreskin to rebuild his urethra and he had a catheter in place for a couple weeks while it healed, but even he responded well to the homeopathics. Sigh - my poor babies!

 

Now, DS1 is fine, except for the occasional un-dissolved stitch making its way out, which he kind of thinks is funny. But in spite of my reassurance, DS2 is still pretty sketchy about having his unit touched (I asked the doc to leave some foreskin, and only take off enough to remedy the retraction problem, so I need to help him wash underneath it during his baths). Hopefully this will resolve in time!

 

Anyway my point is, sometimes it IS necessary to circ, as I found out - but if it's not necessary, why put them through it?!

post #18 of 20
Quote:
Originally Posted by my3beasties View Post
 

Anyway my point is, sometimes it IS necessary to circ, as I found out - but if it's not necessary, why put them through it?!

 

 

yes!  there can be medical reasons for circumcision.  that is certainly important to observe!  thanks for sharing your boys' struggle w/ this!  glad they got good Dr's and care.  and that their mama knows how to care for them!!!  totally rockin' the homeopathy!  that's brilliant!!!

 

i forgot that i've had 2 friends whose son's were circumcised, but due to bad surgeries and/or tissue growing wrong when healing, their boys needed repeat surgeries when they were older.  one the tissue grew down strangely and he had it redone at 2.  another friend who is more private, just mentioned that they hadn't done it right and had complications and 2 procedures in the first year of life.  that helped my husband to appreciate that we have had it very easy!!!

 

i did want to point out that we don't make a lot of special effort to clean the foreskin.  my DS2 has never had his retracted, and never had a problem.  my DS1 had the Dr retract it young, and also has had more time to access it himself, but it's never been particularly dirty.  so he washes it along w/ himself, but it hasn't been a complex process.  

 

i think the length thing is hilarious!  being married at the age of 20 to my 19 year old husband, this was pretty much novel territory for me.  and my sons have been my intro to uncirc'd penises! i never even considered it when approaching this subject!!!

post #19 of 20
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by my3beasties View Post
 

Ohh honey you just made my stomach turn!!! bigeyes.gif  How can those doctors DO such a thing?! Those poor babies!!!

 

I left my boys intact at first - my ex was adamant about it, he had serious size insecurities and wanted them to have their "full package". Fine with me, as I am ALL FOR INTACT, and if this latest bundle is a boy, I will not circ.

 

But it wasn't to stay that way for us - DS1 was born with hypospadias (where the foreskin doesn't completely encircle the glans, and the opening of the urethra falls underneath the tip), and DS2 was born with a foreskin that was too tight to retract, so urine would get trapped underneath and cause horribly painful infections. They both suffered multiple infections - it sucked royally!!! I ended up having to get them both circ'ed and DS1's hypospadias repaired when they were older, ages 4 & 19 mos. I HATED to do it, but for them it was actually necessary. 

 

A wonderful doctor at Children's Hospital did it, back-to-back surgeries where both of them were under full anesthesia, so the only pain was during recovery. DS2 went first, as his was less complicated - when he was in recovery, the only thing they said they could give him for pain was oxycodone, but I refused it as I didn't think that drug was appropriate for a 19mo! Fortunately I had brought my Hyland's Bumps & Bruises tablets and some Calms Forte & Rescue Remedy - after doses of each of those, he settled down and fell asleep in my arms. The doctor came in and his jaw literally dropped seeing how peaceful he was - he was amazed the homeopathy was so effective! DS1 had a tougher time, since they had to use his foreskin to rebuild his urethra and he had a catheter in place for a couple weeks while it healed, but even he responded well to the homeopathics. Sigh - my poor babies!

 

Now, DS1 is fine, except for the occasional un-dissolved stitch making its way out, which he kind of thinks is funny. But in spite of my reassurance, DS2 is still pretty sketchy about having his unit touched (I asked the doc to leave some foreskin, and only take off enough to remedy the retraction problem, so I need to help him wash underneath it during his baths). Hopefully this will resolve in time!

 

Anyway my point is, sometimes it IS necessary to circ, as I found out - but if it's not necessary, why put them through it?!

 

Oh my goodness! I'm so sorry to hear about what your boys had to go through, doesn't sound fun but you got them through it!  Crossing my fingers nothing like happens with this little one if it's a boy. Thanks for sharing, definitely good food for though about the issue.

post #20 of 20
Quote:
Originally Posted by HouseofPeace View Post
 

 

 

yes!  there can be medical reasons for circumcision.  that is certainly important to observe!  thanks for sharing your boys' struggle w/ this!  glad they got good Dr's and care.  and that their mama knows how to care for them!!!  totally rockin' the homeopathy!  that's brilliant!!!

 

i forgot that i've had 2 friends whose son's were circumcised, but due to bad surgeries and/or tissue growing wrong when healing, their boys needed repeat surgeries when they were older.  one the tissue grew down strangely and he had it redone at 2.  another friend who is more private, just mentioned that they hadn't done it right and had complications and 2 procedures in the first year of life.  that helped my husband to appreciate that we have had it very easy!!!

 

i did want to point out that we don't make a lot of special effort to clean the foreskin.  my DS2 has never had his retracted, and never had a problem.  my DS1 had the Dr retract it young, and also has had more time to access it himself, but it's never been particularly dirty.  so he washes it along w/ himself, but it hasn't been a complex process.  

 

i think the length thing is hilarious!  being married at the age of 20 to my 19 year old husband, this was pretty much novel territory for me.  and my sons have been my intro to uncirc'd penises! i never even considered it when approaching this subject!!!

 

Yep, I rock the homeopathy & natural remedies all the time - much to the amazement of allopathic doctors everywhere! LOL About the cleaning thing, I guess I should add that I don't typically do much, but since he's still young I just quickly check under it in the bath to be sure there's no 'smeg' (guess I'm still leery of the infections - OH I can't tell you how awful those were!). But yeah, the length thing is hysterical - some guys can be SO insecure!! Glad I don't have to deal with THAT anymore!  :wink

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by abigailhaze View Post
 

 

Oh my goodness! I'm so sorry to hear about what your boys had to go through, doesn't sound fun but you got them through it!  Crossing my fingers nothing like happens with this little one if it's a boy. Thanks for sharing, definitely good food for though about the issue.

Thanks Abigail, we got through it fine - and I, too, am hoping nothing happens with this one if it's a boy!  LOL Don't think we'll have a problem, different daddy now who doesn't have issues...thank GOD!  But if this one is a boy, intact is the way I'll go!

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