Do your children write thank you notes or call or email their gift-givers??? If not, why not???
We sent gifts to my best friend's two children (son, 14 and daughter 20). BF & I agreed, years ago, that gifts were exchanged for the kids only. The family lives 3,000 miles away.
Our son and her son are great friends and play online games together and talk on the phone a lot.
Our ds and her ds talked on the phone the day after Christmas and her ds says how much he likes his gifts (tells this to our ds). He always calls and says thank you, for anything we send. Our son does the same.
When I got on the phone to talk to BF, she tells me how much her daughter liked the gift we sent. Daughter does not talk on the phone.
Her daughter has never acknowledged any gift we have sent. It is really annoying. When I have asked BF if her daughter received a birthday gift or graduation gift, she replies she did and liked them (and then she says thanks for thinking of her daughter). But, the girl has never had the courtesy to say or write anything. Gifts have been things she wanted (I asked her mom) or large-denomination gift cards from Amazon or B&N, in the $75 - $100 range (when she reached high school / went to college).
I looked past it when she was a child, but she is now, most certainly, old enough to send her own responses.
Yes, the arguments will be said that it is about the giving, not the acknowledging. But, unless I ask, I have no way of knowing that the gift was even received! And, I have spent the time (and the money - gift+shipping) to try and find something she likes/wants/needs or giving her gift cards so she can get exactly what she wants). So, yeah, I DO want an acknowledgement AND a thanks.
I accept that emails are now deemed correct ("etiquettely-speaking!"), so responding in even that form is so easy, yet ignored by so many.
I was brought up that one always acknowledges and thanks people for their courtesy in thinking of me and for taking the time to shop and send / give me a gift, for whatever occasion. We've brought up ds to always say thank you and write a note. Is that so weird or wrong???
I've decided that no more gifts will be in the offing for this girl. Her age makes it easier as she'll be 21 on her next birthday and gifts have always been for the children. We'll send a birthday card and no gift and leave it at that. I will tell her mom why, if she asks.
Manners have, it would seem, gone down the toilet...............