anyone just feeling sort of "eh"? when i first got pregnant i was so excited, but honestly it's kind of been downhill from there. i mean, i'm definitely still excited to have a baby (it's our first and my first pregnancy), but the pregnancy itself is sort of, i don't know, less than great? i don't mean to sound so negative, but throughout the first trimester i just felt sick & tired. even now that my energy is back, and i don't feel sick anymore, i don't feel like myself. and now that my belly is showing a bit, but it isn't clear that i'm pregnant, i just feel fat and uncomfortable all of the time. i guess i'm just having a hard time feeling like this is REAL. i've heard the the baby's heartbeat twice, but it didn't really connect that it was coming from somewhere inside me.
part of this i think has to do with the fact that my life hasn't changed at all. i still wake up every morning and go to work, i still run my restaurant at night, go to sleep, and do it all over again. i have to constantly remind myself that i'm pregnant. i think my bosses and coworkers are trying to be sensitive to my pregnancy by never mentioning it (so that i don't feel like they're treating me any differently, i'm the first pregnant woman our company has ever had), but it just adds to the feeling that it's not really happening.
we're going to be co-sleeping, so there isn't any nursery to set up or anything. i tried putting together our baby registry, which definitely helped a little, but once that was done (which didn't take long, we're not into having a lot of stuff and we have a tiny place so we can't fit a lot) it was back to feeling the same way again.
we're having our first ultrasound on feb 6, so i'm hoping that seeing the baby and finding out the sex will help me feel a little more connected. i'm also looking forward to the birthing and parenting classes that we're planning on taking in the third trimester.
anyway, thank you for listening to my rant. not sure if anyone else is feeling this way, but i wanted to get it off my chest!