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Mothering › Groups › August 2014 Due Date Club › Discussions › Moms of many - any one doing a baby shower?

Moms of many - any one doing a baby shower?

post #1 of 20
Thread Starter 
With my first three, I was soooo antisocial and had no baby showers. With THIS baby, i really want one! I don't really need anything, so it's not to ask people to get us things, I just want to celebrate this baby smile.gif Does anyone have any similar experience?
post #2 of 20

I don't think you can have a shower without asking for things.  I would suggest you look into a blessingway instead.  I threw a get together loosely based on the native American tradition for my aunt who was carrying a child who would never leave the hospital.  Obviously, we didn't want to inundate her with gifts that she would never get to use, but I still wanted her to get the chance to get together with family and friends and celebrate.

post #3 of 20

yes- w/ my 4th i really wanted to celebrate the baby.  she was totally unexpected and i wanted everyone to rejoice in this new one and celebrate her.  i never considered a shower but our housemate at the time was really excited to throw one for me.  we didn't ask for a lot (basically got new onesies and some boy things in case) and those are all my DS2 wears now!  


i loved the party and it was a great way for people who knew us but weren't close (b/c most of my friends were single at the time) get to interact on the baby front w/ me.  and everyone was so excited when she came out b/c by celebrating her, when they met her it was like 'YOU!!!  we were waiting for you and celebrating you!!!'  which was awesome. and she still carries a bit of that w/ her wherever she goes.


blessingway sounds amazing.

post #4 of 20
Thread Starter 
My family would not understand a blessingway at all. I'm strange enough to them as it is, lol. And that's not really what I want, anyways. I guess I would make a registry and all, with newborn this-and-thats, but I'm worried that people will think that the sole reason for a shower now, after so many kids, is that i want gifts.

I just am exited about our surprise #4 smile.gif
post #5 of 20

yeah- my mom thought it was selfish and weird to have a shower on my 4th.  she thought my friend throwing it was presumptuous as well to think people would want to give to a baby that many in...  i think it was very generous and wonderful.


do it w/ a friend if you have someone like that in your life!  that makes it easier.  

post #6 of 20
Food! Do a food shower! People who are really close to you will still get cute baby things, and the others can make freezable food for you to help out postpartum. It solves the "but she doesn't need anything" problem, and allows people to really help you.

Another idea, but you can't ask for it: with number 3, our church gave us a money tree. That was super helpful!
post #7 of 20

A food shower is such a wonderful idea!!! I love it! 

post #8 of 20
Oh I am totally going to do a food shower! Love it. Or maybe a "help us remodel our foul bathroom so I can give birth in it" shower. Think I could do that??
post #9 of 20

Or a paint the nursery party! Put everyone to work :)

post #10 of 20
I had a mama blessing for my second dd, as they were 26mo apart and we didn't need anything. Friends wrote me letters about sisters, motherhood, strength etc., and sent them with a bead. I strung them into a birthing necklace at the party, and they did henna on my belly. Lovely time
post #11 of 20
Mealbaby.com takes care of the food it is awesome
post #12 of 20

If this baby is a girl baby, I am going to let my friends throw me a shower.  With my second (2nd boy) the ladies at church insisted on a shower.  I really didn't need anything, and so most of the stuff was either frivolous or to-be-returned.  I didn't have one with DS #3.  The thing is, if this is a girl, I will have her about the same time that our adoption is final of our oldest (a girl), so I think it would be really fun to have a tea party or something to celebrate both events, not focusing on the baby, but allowing some acknowledgement of her existence as the 5th!  

post #13 of 20

My bestie threw an amazing Mother's blessing (aka blessingway) for me for my 2nd, after years of us doing them for other people.  It was a pivotal day for me in healing emotionally from my first birth, and left me feeling ready for birth.  Our group also does a meal train, and I don't expect a baby shower. Unfortunately, I did already give most of the baby stuff away, as my baby is two and we were not planning on having more!  Oh well ;)  I'm not one for holding onto things that I don't need.  

post #14 of 20
Originally Posted by BallardBaby View Post

Oh I am totally going to do a food shower! Love it. Or maybe a "help us remodel our foul bathroom so I can give birth in it" shower. Think I could do that??
I laughed out loud and almost woke up my DD! I hope you can get your bathroom remodeled!
post #15 of 20

I had a couple traditional showers with my first.  For my second, my friends did a nice "blessingway"  The guests were instructed to bring a freezer meal for us instead of gifts.  Oh and a bead to add to a necklace.  It was a sweet and intimate time with close friends and family.  I liked how the focus wasn't on gifts at all.  For my third, my fellow LLL leaders just did a little bbq and gave me some freezer meals.  There are only 4 of us so it wasn't a big thing, but still nice.  I am not really expecting much this time and that is fine.  I do need a few things, like a new carseat, but really by the 4th kid you realize how little you actually need. ;)

post #16 of 20

Another idea is a sip-n-see after baby is born if you are up to it.  That is another way to take the focus off the gifts and put it on the new baby excitement.

post #17 of 20

With my first I was in my last semester of college and a bunch of friends set up a "diaper collection" where everyone donated diapers and diaper changing supplies and it was pretty much the best thing ever. We didn't pay for anything diapering related for almost a year (such a huge help!) and when we had things we couldn't use (wrong diaper cream, wrong size diapers, etc) we could walk into pretty much any store and exchange it for what we needed. 
We weren't CDing at the time, but I imagine it could work really similarly if people were directed on what to get(via registry or whatever)

I didn't think we'd do anything for this one because I was always under the impression that you only got a shower for your first... but I have a friend who is positively insisting on throwing a shower for this babe, and although I'm not a shower person it's been 9 years since our first and we have NOTHING baby related anymore so gifts wouldn't hurt... that said, I have hated every single traditional baby shower I've ever been to and absolutely don't want that, nor do I really want a blessing way (in spite of the fact that I was raised in a family where that is normal, and my husband is Native American). 

Anyway, this time I think it would be really nice to have a BBQ/Cookout party that's less focused on being a "shower" and more about being a "celebration" and if people want to bring gifts great but if not that's just as well. 

post #18 of 20
Thread Starter 

It's for sure not going to be a traditional shower. More of a party with baby shower type games and lots of drinks drink.gif. I'm also leaning towards a bbq/pool party.  


I do have another question! Would writing, "Gifts not necessary, but hand-me-downs or frozen meals for after the birth would be greatly appreciated!" be rude? Lol. Maybe I won't write the hand me down part, mostly because everyone has already given us their hand me downs :) 


Just thinking out loud.

post #19 of 20
I personally would love getting an invite like that. I'm not Emily Post, but asking for freezer meals and hand me downs seems almost quaint compared to most of the uber-materialistic showers we attend...
post #20 of 20

I think that sounds like a great idea CherryBombMama. I love this whole idea of bringing a freezer meal instead of a gift too. I think I may do something like that. I hated my baby shower, so I don't want to do all the stupid games and stuff. Plus so many of my friends are boys that it mostly ended up being family and me feeling weird that I had like 2 friends that were girls there. Maybe this time we'll do a big celebration of baby bbq too!

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