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Childcare

post #1 of 7
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Hi ladies;

 

As mentioned on Facebook, we are now in our transition to daycare and it is so much harder than I ever anticipated, so I thought it might be nice to have a thread discussing these kinds of changes in our lives right now, given that all our babies are now approaching one year (!).

 

For us, daycare will be three days per week (Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday) through an organization with a location nearby, though still only accessible via public transit for us. It's not terribly convenient but it's a temporary place until June when we start at the place we really like that is essentially across the street from DH's work. This place is fine and all, but it's very "process oriented" so the babies don't really have that much structure and it feels to me like they're just wandering aimlessly around this huge room full of toys all day.

 

Our first day was Thursday where I stayed for the whole time for an hour, then we came back on Friday and I stayed for half an hour then left her there under their care for two hours. I was anticipating some sadness but what I got was uncontrollable guilt, anxiety, and sobbing... to a point where for the next two days I couldn't even let DH take her out to the store without me without feeling the crushing guilt again. I felt like I had abandoned her and put a serious scar on the relationship of complete trust that I have spent the past year creating with her. When I came to pick her up she had clearly been crying for some time but she was being cuddled by one of the workers and was mostly in a state of sniffling. Apparently she had been okay for a lot of the time but had been crying for the past twenty minutes or so, but they said she let them pick her up and comfort her, which is apparently a good sign that she'll transition well in the end. Regardless, it literally makes my stomach hurt to think about how I'm bringing her back there tomorrow (from morning until just after noon) and Wednesday (for the whole day).

 

How's everyone else doing with this? I know there are a couple mamas in this group who have already been dealing with this for a little while - how did you get through it?

 

I fully expect for this to get easier once I'm actually back at work, which starts Feb 3, since I'll be distracted and DH will be the one dropping her off while I get to be the one picking her up, but the next two days will be hell.

post #2 of 7

Teles, I just wanted to send you this:

 

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post #3 of 7

sorry teles, hugs 

post #4 of 7
Hugs !!

Um, all those emoticons make it impossible to load this in tapatalk. wink1.gif
And sloooow typing on the site
post #5 of 7
Thread Starter 

Thanks for all the love, mamas

 

A quick update: the second and third days were SO much easier. I had another bought of mastitis (my body has not been tolerating all this stress very well) so I spent Tuesday curled around the pump, but Wednesday was actually really smooth for me and I was able to focus and get some things done around the house while she was away. It was actually kind of enjoyable. She's still struggling with her transition a bit but it's mostly around napping in a strange environment without me. They have webcams there and I was checking up on her frequently throughout the day and didn't really catch her crying, so that's a good sign.

post #6 of 7

So glad to hear that!  I have been thinking of all of you!  So nice that you have gotten so much time to spend with your LOs.  6 weeks is pretty normal here in the US.  When DD1 was born, my boss was actually a little irritated that I wanted to take 6 weeks off.  I ended up working from home after those 6 weeks, and then leaving the company right around her 1st birthday.  I had to leave her quite a bit with DH after those first 6 weeks to get work stuff done.  It was hard.

 

Glad it is going better now.

post #7 of 7
Glad it's going better Teles! I know the napping will be our biggest issue too. I'm anticipating a rough couple of weeks ahead. Most of the other kids are on one nap a day and I know she won't sleep when there is so much going on, so she's going to be majorly overtired until she gets used to it.

Other than that I don't anticipate any problems. We have been to visit a few times and she seems comfortable there and is pretty social so hopefully she won't miss me too much! I'm going back to work a week from Monday.
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