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Birth plans? - Page 3

post #41 of 88

I don<t know, this stresses me out.

Ds1 was born at the hospital with an OB.

DS2: homebirth with a midwife. He was 11 pounds 2 ounces, and had a bad shoulder dystocia then meconium aspiration. so was sent to the hospital (NICU) minutes after his traumatic homebirth. We stayed there 3 weeks.

I don't want to risk that again, but I really don,t want a c-section neither. I have to find a way to grow a smaller baby this time, then it will be a vaginal birth with midwife (we will have to discuss home vs hospital). I am really trying to eat super healthy since my BFP. I figure: even if it won,t help with baby size, it can not be bad for both of us. I gained 50 pounds with each pregnancy, so I am determined to have a healthier nutrion this time.  Mostly eating vegetables, fruit, fish and nuts, some dairy/meet (no ampty calories, no excessif carbs, just normal amounts).....I feel better on a healthier diet. 

post #42 of 88
I'll deliver in a hospital with a level III NICU, because I am paranoid. I won't be putting together a birth plan this time. It just stressed me out when everything was the opposite of what I thought it was going to be.
post #43 of 88
Lilitchka, I'm sorry you had such a traumatic experience. I can imagine feeling some anxiety about it all. It sounds like you're taking steps to improve your chances of a littler babe.

Isaroo, it doesn't sound paranoid to me. It sounds like you know what will make you feel safest and you're taking steps to make that happen. And the safer mama feels, the better chance for an easy delivery.
post #44 of 88
Right of Passage, we had UC with our last daughter as well and are considering another one this time. Where we live, home birth midwives can not practice legally so there is one woman who is currently attending home births but she is technically practicing medicine without a license. The relationship between the hospitals and the home birth community is hostile. It has created a dangerous situation for mothers and it is sickening that it has come to this. There are a lot of amazing people in this community trying to change the situation, though, and we have made some very slow progress!

KatelynRose, my family just returned from a 7-month road trip in the northwest. We spent about 2 months in Portland altogether and I met so many amazing women there! There is a facebook group called Portland Mamas that is very active. You should request to be added if you are on fb! My family is there and my sister-in-law just had a hospital birth with midwives 6 months ago. She had a fantastic experience. I know that home birth midwives can legally practice and can be found in abundance there, and there are several birth centers. You'll love it there. It's our favorite city in this country and if I could have handled being so far away from my mom and the strong community I have here in IL, we would have stayed for sure.
post #45 of 88
We are planning a home birth with midwives.

This was our plan last time around, in September 2012, but there was meconium staining so we had to transfer to the hospital, where we had constant fetal monitering and an IV for dehydration and so I had to be on my back through back labour, baby was not wel positioned and so I wasnt dilating. I needed to have an epidural after 18hrs, then six hours later pushed for 2.5hrs. OB was coming in to the room to give me a delivery deadline and midwives were asking for more time. In the end, baby was floppy but quickly pinked up and is quite healthy. The birth experience though, was stressful, scary and disappointing.

I'm looking forward to hoping this birth will be more normal and natural. I have more realistic expectations of what birth is (more like a marathon than a meditative yoga session), and I'm hoping to keep myself strong and in good physical shape. I'm also going to have to spend some time in this pregnancy working through the fears that remain from last birth.
post #46 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by Right of Passage View Post
 

I prefer the phrase family birth over unassisted birth but either way it's a freebirth. IMO the "unassisted" label carries an undercurrent that birth requires an attendant, it doesn't. 

I agree! DS was born in a free-standing birth center. I have felt really called to freebirth and we are looking forward to planning ours. Like many of you ladies we will probably end up moving during this pregnancy and it's nice not to have to worry about midwife laws, etc. in a new state

post #47 of 88
Just curious, past/current freebirth mamas, did you or are you doing your own prenatal care? We did our own last time but we worked with a midwife friend who was there to answer questions and give support along the way.

We actually realized, after 24 hours of inconsistent contractions and stalled progress, that her shoulder was caught on my pelvic bone. We knew for days that she was posterior and through our own knowledge, our midwifery manual, bing (!!) and confirmation from the midwife over the phone, realized that she was caught and that's why she couldn't spin to move down. We learned the lift and tuck technique from spinningbabies and we turned her on our own. She was born about 10 minutes later, pink and quietly alert, and nursed immediately after birth! It was amazing and empowering, but I don't know if I want all that drama this time. lol!

I might work with a midwife and decide in labor if I feel that we need her there or not. There is only one homebirth midwife here. I'll meet her at my bff's birth in a few weeks and see how I feel.
post #48 of 88
Thread Starter 

I up'ed last time and will again this time. I don't really do anything like a midwife's care, I just take care of me, occasionally listen to baby with the fetoscope, and enjoy the ride.

post #49 of 88

I guess I am not ready to make a plan. Last birth we planned a home birth and ended up transferring but it still went well in the hospital, i just needed a little epidural and then i opened, slept for a bit (three days of labor) waited for epiduaral to wear off and then pushed him out naturally.  Around here we have to do "dual care" if we choose to homebirth and the private practice where I go is very progressive. The midwife who delivered my son in the hospital was way more experienced and confident then the homebirth midwives who made the call to move to the hospital because I wasn't progressing past 7. One of my husbands old friends has been a midwife in Santa cruz  fro 30 years and she says what happened the first time will not happen the second time so I should try home birth again. But honestly I think I would only do it if she herself came here to deliver my baby.  The homebirth midwives around here just don't do it for me. I like the team at the clinic and especially the one midwife who delivered my first son. I guess I could labor at home until I couldn't do it anymore than go to the hospital. Also i am going to do hypnobabies this time... Ill let you know once I figure this out. gotta get through the first trimester first...

post #50 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by seasiren View Post
 

I guess I am not ready to make a plan. Last birth we planned a home birth and ended up transferring but it still went well in the hospital, i just needed a little epidural and then i opened, slept for a bit (three days of labor) waited for epiduaral to wear off and then pushed him out naturally.  Around here we have to do "dual care" if we choose to homebirth and the private practice where I go is very progressive. The midwife who delivered my son in the hospital was way more experienced and confident then the homebirth midwives who made the call to move to the hospital because I wasn't progressing past 7. One of my husbands old friends has been a midwife in Santa cruz  fro 30 years and she says what happened the first time will not happen the second time so I should try home birth again. But honestly I think I would only do it if she herself came here to deliver my baby.  The homebirth midwives around here just don't do it for me. I like the team at the clinic and especially the one midwife who delivered my first son. I guess I could labor at home until I couldn't do it anymore than go to the hospital. Also i am going to do hypnobabies this time... Ill let you know once I figure this out. gotta get through the first trimester first...

 

My labors keep getting longer and longer.. 1st was 8 hrs, birth center to hospital transfer, still drug-free vaginal birth. 2nd was 1 1/2 days, birthcenter water birth. 3rd was a planned hospital birth (because I didn't have the money to pay out of pocket for a HB), 3 days of labor.. by the time I finally went to the hospital, after 3 days of laboring and only being 5cm, I got an epi for the same reasons that you did. You never know. Most everyone's labors get shorter, mine get longer. I don't regret getting the epi, even though it may have put a damper on my crunchy-mama status, lol. 

post #51 of 88

Seastars: where in BC do you live? One of my good friends is a midwife in White Rock. I would *totally* have her attend my birth if I could!!

 

I would quite like to have a drug-free home birth with a birthing pool. My partner is a lot more squeamish about the idea of birth at home. But I guess we have quite a few months to figure it out! In any case, when you have a hospital birth in Norway, it is midwives that attend your birth, and the doctor just floats around in case of emergency. Norway is known for being very low-intervention -- sometimes the hospital in the city I live has actually been criticized for not going to c-section soon enough. The reasons I think home birth would be nice are:

-I can be more relaxed on my own turf

-I can eat the kind of food I like and want (vegetarian, not nasty hospital fare)

-I will be assured that I can use the birthing pool (they have one "birth center" type birthing room with a pool at the hospital but if someone else is already using it, then you're out of luck)

-I will have the same midwife with me through the whole birth (whereas in the hospital they work shifts)

 

We only live a 5 minute drive from the hospital anyhow.

My wife feels that it doesn't make much sense to do a home birth given that Norway is so low-intervention anyhow -- the most important reasons for people in some other countries to do home birth are not really issues here. Also, a hospital birth is free, whereas a home birth costs about $1000 (you get a few hundred bucks back from the government, since you save them money by not using the hospital). We'll probably decide after the first trimester has passed.

 

Whether we do a home birth or hospital birth, I want to have a doula.

post #52 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by ybutterfly View Post
 

Seastars: where in BC do you live? One of my good friends is a midwife in White Rock. I would *totally* have her attend my birth if I could!!

 

I would quite like to have a drug-free home birth with a birthing pool. My partner is a lot more squeamish about the idea of birth at home. But I guess we have quite a few months to figure it out! In any case, when you have a hospital birth in Norway, it is midwives that attend your birth, and the doctor just floats around in case of emergency. Norway is known for being very low-intervention -- sometimes the hospital in the city I live has actually been criticized for not going to c-section soon enough. The reasons I think home birth would be nice are:

-I can be more relaxed on my own turf

-I can eat the kind of food I like and want (vegetarian, not nasty hospital fare)

-I will be assured that I can use the birthing pool (they have one "birth center" type birthing room with a pool at the hospital but if someone else is already using it, then you're out of luck)

-I will have the same midwife with me through the whole birth (whereas in the hospital they work shifts)

 

We only live a 5 minute drive from the hospital anyhow.

My wife feels that it doesn't make much sense to do a home birth given that Norway is so low-intervention anyhow -- the most important reasons for people in some other countries to do home birth are not really issues here. Also, a hospital birth is free, whereas a home birth costs about $1000 (you get a few hundred bucks back from the government, since you save them money by not using the hospital). We'll probably decide after the first trimester has passed.

 

Whether we do a home birth or hospital birth, I want to have a doula.

 

It sounds like either would be good options. I'd feel less reluctant to go to a hospital if they were low-intervention. Being so close to the hospital if you have a homebirth is good too. For me, it would come down to the cost, I think. But where I live, a homebirth costs $3500 (and we're on the low-end of costs). $1000, minus a few hundred refund, does not sound bad! 

post #53 of 88

ybutterfly - I'm in Vancouver, and am set up with a pretty great team. But thanks for the tip! If I ever have a pregnant friend in White Rock I'll look you up!  I have a lot of the same concerns that you do re: hospital birth - comfort, food (although I think I'd just bring food), and people I don't know coming in (though apparently this can be limited to one nurse). 

 

I feel so lucky that in BC, I can decide last minute. I could literally be half way through labour and say "I'm not going to the hospital." (Which is a real concern for me - I mean, last time I remember at one point asking my midwife whether they'd send me home from the hospital if I showed up at that point.  She didn't do an internal check, but said that, based on what she was seeing, they would send me back home again. That made me feel SO grateful to be doing a home birth. I really don't understand how people get in a car, drive to the hospital, find parking, wait to be admitted and then get settled in a new space in the middle of labour. But, I might be doing it in October. Anyone have tips for how to make that transition as smooth as possible?)

 

But, after my experience with my daughter's birth, I just don't think I'd be able to fully relax at home. The postpartum hemorrhage, passing out, ambulance transfer and separation from baby were somewhat traumatic. It's given me a bit of a different view of home birth - of course, I absolutely support women in choosing it, but I see that if things don't go as planned, it has its own set of risks and potential trauma. My experience also made me feel more anxious for people choosing to UC/family birth.

 

Right of Passage (and anyone else thinking of UC) - you seem so confident in your choice. Amazing. Feel free not to answer, but I'd love to hear how you process and make sense of risks to being alone with family? Things like cord prolapse, placenta previa, hemorrhage, etc. I hope that isn't too personal or upsetting a question. I'm just genuinely curious. I have become more anxious since my first birth, and I'm quite envious of people with such confidence in the birth process.

post #54 of 88

With our first, I had a natural hospital birth with a fantastic CMN. Now we've moved to southern California and my husband's job decided to switch to a HMO. It looks like I'll have no choice ( if we want it covered) but to deliver at one of Kaisers hospitals which, according to the data I've seen, has a horrendous c-section rate. I REALLY want a home-birth but my husband won't even hear it.

 

I think we've settled on having pre-natal care with whoever our HMO will cover and than transfer to a free standing birth center from about 30 weeks on and pay for the birth and final prenatal visits out of pocket. 

 

I am 100% sure I want to avoid hospitals unless of emergency!

post #55 of 88
I'll have a homebirth. I had my birth at home with my son. I'm a midwife so I guess it's a give in for me. I'll know my midwives very well and try to go at it as unassisted as I can. DS was posterior and I needed my midwife's help getting him out and that was followed by a PPH so definitely want midwives present just in case.
post #56 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by Naftalita2012 View Post
 

With our first, I had a natural hospital birth with a fantastic CMN. Now we've moved to southern California and my husband's job decided to switch to a HMO. It looks like I'll have no choice ( if we want it covered) but to deliver at one of Kaisers hospitals which, according to the data I've seen, has a horrendous c-section rate. I REALLY want a home-birth but my husband won't even hear it.

 

I think we've settled on having pre-natal care with whoever our HMO will cover and than transfer to a free standing birth center from about 30 weeks on and pay for the birth and final prenatal visits out of pocket. 

 

I am 100% sure I want to avoid hospitals unless of emergency!


If you are in California you may want to look into AIM. They may be able to help with supplementing insurance. I am just learning about it, but its one of the covered California supplemental pregnancy insurances. Also you may be able to get off your husbands insurance and get on covered CA and get AIM that way.

post #57 of 88

I don't know how much prenatal care or not we'll have. Right now we live with my family and while my mom (a nurse) is growing more comfortable with the idea of a UC, she really wants me to receive prenatal care. I know my husband would prefer it as well. I think we could do our own but I feel like I would either be fighting with my mom about not going or fighting with the doctor the whole time I'm there because of refusing unnecessary tests. So I'm going to wait as long as possible (like 12 weeks) before going in and then only go in as often as necessary. We might be moving and then I would consider not finding a new provider. The only thing is that I probably want insurance to cover the birth in the case of an emergency in which I had to be assisted. If I apply for insurance they'll probably want me to have a care provider and actually go see them. Luckily it's still early so there's time to iron that all out.


Edited by katealicia - 2/8/14 at 6:02pm
post #58 of 88
Hi, all smile.gif
This will be our first, and I'm planning a hospital birth.
I have a lot of damage to my back that causes pain all the time, and I'm hopeful that pregnancy and birth will be okay-ish pain-wise (okay as in painful but not traumatically painful), and I think it's realistic to expect that I'll want an epidural. I understand the ways that can change a birth in negative ways, but I'm more interested in how less pain will hopefully allow me to be more present.
The thing is, where I live, I don't have any options! I always thought I'd deliver in a hospital with a nurse midwife after the births i've seen (I'm an RN, and during my OB rotation in school I got to see many births at a birth center that was separate-but-attached to a small hospital). Sure, I've only seen hospital births up close, but there is such variation! The nurse midwife-assisted births were so much more relaxed and the moms were allowed to labor much more slowly. I've seen very good OBs, but the midwives are amazing. One even let me scrub in and deliver my friend's baby! (Not that it needs much help at that point!)
But there are NO MIDWIVES IN THE UPPER PENINSULA. No midwives. I had no idea. Assisted home birth would not be an option. No midwives at any practices. No birth centers. I don't think there are even any doulas here. And my family is far away. I'm comfortable with a hospital birth, other than the real possibility of being pushed into interventions too soon, but I'm feeling a little bummed out that I don't have more options.
I love how most of us are so comfortable with our choices, whatever they are! The supportive words here are extra important for those of us without family or girlfriends around smile.gif
post #59 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by Katiepants View Post

Hi, all smile.gif
This will be our first, and I'm planning a hospital birth.
I have a lot of damage to my back that causes pain all the time, and I'm hopeful that pregnancy and birth will be okay-ish pain-wise (okay as in painful but not traumatically painful), and I think it's realistic to expect that I'll want an epidural. I understand the ways that can change a birth in negative ways, but I'm more interested in how less pain will hopefully allow me to be more present.
The thing is, where I live, I don't have any options! I always thought I'd deliver in a hospital with a nurse midwife after the births i've seen (I'm an RN, and during my OB rotation in school I got to see many births at a birth center that was separate-but-attached to a small hospital). Sure, I've only seen hospital births up close, but there is such variation! The nurse midwife-assisted births were so much more relaxed and the moms were allowed to labor much more slowly. I've seen very good OBs, but the midwives are amazing. One even let me scrub in and deliver my friend's baby! (Not that it needs much help at that point!)
But there are NO MIDWIVES IN THE UPPER PENINSULA. No midwives. I had no idea. Assisted home birth would not be an option. No midwives at any practices. No birth centers. I don't think there are even any doulas here. And my family is far away. I'm comfortable with a hospital birth, other than the real possibility of being pushed into interventions too soon, but I'm feeling a little bummed out that I don't have more options.
I love how most of us are so comfortable with our choices, whatever they are! The supportive words here are extra important for those of us without family or girlfriends around smile.gif

 

I think every mama should make the choices she feels are best ;) 

I'm sorry you don't have any options there! I live in a similar area, at least where there are no midwives at the hospital here. There are doulas, and HB MWs, but no CNMs. 

post #60 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by seasiren View Post
 


If you are in California you may want to look into AIM. They may be able to help with supplementing insurance. I am just learning about it, but its one of the covered California supplemental pregnancy insurances. Also you may be able to get off your husbands insurance and get on covered CA and get AIM that way.

Thanks so much! I'll definitely be looking into this! 

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