We are planning our fourth homebirth/waterbirth, with our wonderful LM/CPM (first baby was born in a free-standing birth center, which may as well have been a homebirth; it was just a hb in someone else's home!). Our kids will be there, along with my mom, sister, a friend, and hopefully my bff (my babies come quickly, and she's only made it to one of my births). I'm hoping to have a birth photographer, too, but we shall see.
Originally Posted by Right of Passage
I prefer the phrase family birth over unassisted birth but either way it's a freebirth. IMO the "unassisted" label carries an undercurrent that birth requires an attendant, it doesn't. Thats probably not a popular opinion around here any more, but I truly believe birth happens best when mom is alone on her own turf. When you go onto someone else's turf you have to deal with their rules and fight when you're most vulnerable, I've done that and it ended in a cesarean and trauma to me and ds1. This will be my 4th VBAC, after being told I should never attempt because it's too dangerous and my body cant handle it.
Way to go, mama!
I dream of a UC. I think my mom secretly wants me to have an accidental UC, so she can say she was the midwife. She actually talked about looking into freebirth classes when I had my second or third. It's pretty funny, because she was really against me having an OOH birth with our first, but after he was born, she's totally changed her tune, and is a huge HB supporter.
Anyway, as much as I love the idea of a UC, I'm a bleeder, and I always require assistance after the birth. After my fourth, between the bleeding and the shock of INSANE afterbirth pains, I threw up and passed out. I couldn't have made it through that without my MW. Thankfully, she is awesome and is super-hands off. She just lets me do my thing, and she's there for support if I need her.
Originally Posted by Bramblebaby
I'm not sure. My first two were UCs. The four after that were home waterbirths with midwife. My seventh was induced in the hospital at 34 weeks because he died. Not thrilled about going back to that hospital and triggering those memories, but feeling some trust issues with my midwife. I'm not ready to decide, yet.
So sorry, mama.
Originally Posted by mama025
I'm leaning towards a hospital birth but I'm so scared I'll still end up with a c section, induced/pitocin, etc etc and something traumatic happening. How do you know/find a "natural, midwife"? Ive heard so many horror stories of midwives that end up doing all the above mentioned and not pushing for a natural birth as they promised during prenatal meetings. Do you have someone you know or a way to "check"???
You have to do your research. Ask around in your local birth community. Ask in Finding Your Tribe, on Facebook groups for natural birth in your area, and mamas that you meet at local birth events (assuming they exist; my area is pretty saturated with midwives and doulas, so there is a lot going on all of the time). Also, interview midwives, and ask a million questions. Don't be afraid to interview a bunch of midwives, and don't hire one that you don't absolutely love and click with.
Originally Posted by mama025
I live in MN Twin Cities. There are 3 birth centers but my husband is very skeptical at my going there (but I still made appointments there, to at least get a feel for it), also researching hospitals now with midwives...
Will he go to interviews with you? A lot of husbands find it helpful to attend the interviews and talk to the midwives themselves (even if they are reluctant to go in the first place).
Originally Posted by Naftalita2012
With our first, I had a natural hospital birth with a fantastic CMN. Now we've moved to southern California and my husband's job decided to switch to a HMO. It looks like I'll have no choice ( if we want it covered) but to deliver at one of Kaisers hospitals which, according to the data I've seen, has a horrendous c-section rate. I REALLY want a home-birth but my husband won't even hear it.
I think we've settled on having pre-natal care with whoever our HMO will cover and than transfer to a free standing birth center from about 30 weeks on and pay for the birth and final prenatal visits out of pocket.
I am 100% sure I want to avoid hospitals unless of emergency!
Whereabouts are you? A lot of midwives are willing to work with you on cost and payments! I know a midwife who told me she's had clients pay her for years after their baby was born (not that that is her ideal, but she will do whatever she can to help women have the birth they want).