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do you wear make-up? - Page 2

post #21 of 45

I love this thread!  It's been definitely an interesting read.  I didn't realize so many people made the conscious decision to wear makeup vs not wearing makeup.  I wear makeup.  I use some base, blush and powder.  I also love glitter and sparkly things and so I frequently put on a silvery dark glittery eyeshadow.  Yes, even to just stay home and clean my cat box and vacuum.  It's part of my morning routine.  I hardly ever wear lipstick, maybe Burt's Bees lipbalm.  I also have glitter lip gloss that's clear that I use.  Yea, glitter obsession.  Hey, I even have glitter body spray, but I usually save that for going out.  My 10 year old is not really interested in makeup- though she colors her hair crazy colors.  My 8 year old plays with my extra makeup- cheap stuff I use if I want something funky.  She and her friend will go all out putting crazy makeup on and dance and have mini fashion shows.  I'm totally a "if it's not comfortable I won't wear it" person, so I'm not sure where she got the fashionista thing!  

 

My kids have asked me why I wear makeup.  I told them it smoothed out my complexion and it really does make my face feel less oily plus it's fun for me and makes me feel good.  I think those are all good reasons.  I guess I never really gave it thought seriously- as in, what message am I sending my children by wearing makeup?  I did not wear eye shadow the other day and the girls and I were sitting at the table talking and they mentioned it was a teacher's birthday and he was turning like 31 or something.  I said "Oh!  I thought he was younger than that.  He looks young." and the girls were like "Well, mommy.. you look the same age as that teacher (I am 36) when you are wearing makeup... but you look older today."  LOL!  They didn't mean in a cruel or negative way.  And I didn't take it that way.  Nor did I go put on any eye shadow.  ;)

post #22 of 45
Quote:
Originally Posted by meowmix View Post
 

"Well, mommy.. you look the same age as that teacher (I am 36) when you are wearing makeup... but you look older today."  

My then-4yo niece saw a picture of me on my 19th birthday, ready to go out and see a play with my parents.  I wore the makeup I usually wore (though that was the beginning of the end of it) and she said "Oh, that's you.  That's from back when you were pretty!"  

 

Thanks, sweetie :)  I was 24 at the time when she said that.

post #23 of 45

 

Quote:

Originally Posted by SweetSilver View Post

Somehow we've connected it with insecurity, but that impression is strengthened when women start wearing it because they feel frumpy instead of "wow, I love this whole look together".  

 

Anyway.... thoughts.

 

In a way, isn't it the same thing as wearing a pair of flattering pants that make you feel attractive?  Or, doing your hair in a way that makes you feel attractive? Or, is your issue with any "decorative-type" of thing that boosts your confidence?  Meaning, you should feel confident without any type of exterior adornment? 

post #24 of 45

Hmmm.... I'll have to think about that to respond more thoroughly.

 

For now, my first thought is that at some point they do become the same.  At some point, even with clothing, I feel that vanity can get over-stressed (not implying here that vanity is bad, just it's a useful word in this context--meaning feelings regarding personal appearance) but where that point is, even for me personally, is a bit of a mystery.  Since I don't wear makeup and haven't for 25 years, it's natural that I connect "any makeup" for myself with a higher level of vanity (again, not negatively) than clothing that also might be chosen for vanity because I do not consider makeup as part of a routine that leads to an appearance that leaves me feeling comfortable and confident.  At some point, I must even question that, but not here and now.  More thinking to do.  I hope I'm making sense.

 

If anyone likes a better word besides "vanity" for this, please suggest.

 

And yes, ideally it would be nice to feel confident without exterior adornment, but I think the tendency is biologically ingrained to some degree, and societies that eschew it are fairly marginalized, aren't they?

post #25 of 45
Thread Starter 

Loving all the different view points of make-up here!  Seems like its one of those things that may be useless to over think!  Today it struck me as hilarious that I have been putting so much thought into it lately, and yet I HAVE NOT SHAVED MY LEGS OR ARM PITS IN 15 YEARS- and I never give that a second thought! LOL!  I also thought about all the women I admire most in this world, some wear make-up, so do not, and to tell you the truth, either way I never thought about it on them, all I saw was an amazing woman!  This is a great web site: it has a running slide show of amazing women and lots of them do wear make-up! http://trulyamazingwomen.com/  

I have decided to try not to feel "guilty" about my make-up choices anymore (if I wear it or not!)

 

SweetSilver, Thanks for the dialogue!  I don't mind the nitpicking, one of my majors in college was philosophy so I love the deeper thinking on the issue!  I will say I am raising my daughter to be very pro-woman.  I focus my spiritual life around nature, and goddesses, and venerating women like our ancient ancestors once did.  I live from the view point that women are inherently the healers and peace keepers in our world and while men are important in their own way, I do believe being a woman is a wonderful gift and should be celebrated in any way one sees fit!  I also have lots of tattoos, a pierced nose, and love to do Henna art on myself, so I suppose my new found adventure in make-up is just one more way to express/adorn/decorate/celebrate myself!  Peace!

post #26 of 45
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mulvah View Post
 

 

 

In a way, isn't it the same thing as wearing a pair of flattering pants that make you feel attractive?  Or, doing your hair in a way that makes you feel attractive? Or, is your issue with any "decorative-type" of thing that boosts your confidence?  Meaning, you should feel confident without any type of exterior adornment? 

I wondered that as well because when I was replying I was also thinking about going and getting my hair professionally colored.  I do it for me and it makes me feel really good.  I love getting a good hair cut and color!  And yes, it makes me more attractive to the opposite sex based on cultural beauty standards, but that's not why I do it, really (I'm quite happy in my monogamous relationship with my husband who finds me attractive even when I don't feel attractive).   I do it because it pleases me and makes me happy.  Just like glitter eyeshadow.  

 

I think you raise a good point about feeling confident without any type of exterior adornment.  I wonder if any studies have been done. I wonder how I would feel walking into a job interview without makeup vs. walking into one with makeup.  How about going to a meeting or a "fancy dinner" if I did not color my hair (so it would be a mix of grey and a flat brown color) or put on any make up.  I think I would feel self conscious.. but maybe I would still be confident.  The self consciousness would come from the fact that I always wore makeup and colored my hair.  I would feel like I hadn't finished getting ready.

post #27 of 45
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by SweetSilver View Post
 

Hmmm.... I'll have to think about that to respond more thoroughly.

 

For now, my first thought is that at some point they do become the same.  At some point, even with clothing, I feel that vanity can get over-stressed (not implying here that vanity is bad, just it's a useful word in this context--meaning feelings regarding personal appearance) but where that point is, even for me personally, is a bit of a mystery.  Since I don't wear makeup and haven't for 25 years, it's natural that I connect "any makeup" for myself with a higher level of vanity (again, not negatively) than clothing that also might be chosen for vanity because I do not consider makeup as part of a routine that leads to an appearance that leaves me feeling comfortable and confident.  At some point, I must even question that, but not here and now.  More thinking to do.  I hope I'm making sense.

 

If anyone likes a better word besides "vanity" for this, please suggest.

 

And yes, ideally it would be nice to feel confident without exterior adornment, but I think the tendency is biologically ingrained to some degree, and societies that eschew it are fairly marginalized, aren't they?

OP here again!  Sorry, but I have to say the word "vanity" is not the point of this thread, the OED defines vanity as: "1. a. That which is vain, futile, or worthless; that which is of no value or profit." And Merriam Webster defines it as: "1.van·i·ty noun \ˈva-nə-tē\ : the quality of people who have too much pride in their own appearance, abilities, achievements, etc. : the quality of being vain : something (such as a belief or a way of behaving) which shows that you have too much pride in yourself, your social status, etc." 

I think this thread proves that makeup is much more to many woman than a vain pursuit (I'm willing to bet there are some very vain people in the world who don't wear makeup).   I would like to suggest the term "self adornment"!

post #28 of 45
Quote:
Originally Posted by gardendweller View Post
 

 I would like to suggest the term "self adornment"!

Not arguing with the dislike of the term "vanity", but it is a word for the quality that might lead to self-adornment beyond self preservation.  So, self-adornment is what happens when one is feeling, vain?  prideful?  self-concious?  That's the word I'm looking for, and I realize "vanity" is not it (though at what point vanity begins is up for debate).  It would be a perfectly acceptable definition, according to some, to declare that anything beyond the necessary is vanity, or pridefulness.  What do we sit at when applying makeup and brushing our hair?  The Vanity.  Oops.  Am I nitpicking again?

post #29 of 45
Thread Starter 
I wish women would support each other with loving kindness, instead of judging and name calling.
post #30 of 45

If this is in reference to my post, then I will say you've entirely misunderstood my point.  But I'll bow out anyway.

post #31 of 45

i do once in a while - for myself. 

 

i would like to put on more but i dont have the guts to do it. i always admire those who use over make up tastefully. they seem to be so confident and carry themselves so well. i love confident people = women who walk with their head held high. with or without makeup.   

 

i dont care for make up. instead i LOVE face paint or body paint. i think its the art aspect of it. make up is a tame version of that. its usually eye liner and lipstick for me. 

 

but come halloween and WOAH. watch out ladies here i come. my costume is simple, my make up is phenomenal. 

 

however having said that - when i have had to attend formal meetings - dressed in business suit (not recently, whew) i always apply a little make up as i feel naked and half dressed when i dont wear make up with a suit. it calls for it and i are not complete without it.

post #32 of 45

I developed wrinkles much sooner than I anticipated. Add liver spots and I was feeling pretty sad.  I work in an office 5 days a week, now, and makeup is part of my daily routine.  Yesterday was maybe the third time I went to work without makeup since August.  Makeup helps me feel a little more grown up and professional.  I believe it makes a better first impression, until people can get to know me and my sparkling personality. 

 

I can say that I didn't bother with makeup for the first 15 years of adulthood because I didn't 'need' it. I didn't.  But, seriously, it was also because I was soooo scared of doing a bad job, it was just best not to wear any at all. I'd like to have worn more.

 

I'm still pretty conservative, relatively.  Most days it's foundation, neutral eye shadow, mascara, blush, and lip gloss.  Sometimes eye liner. I'd probably wear eyeliner more if I could do a better job.

 

Same with color eyeshadow. I've got a frosty bronze I wear periodically, very subtle. But any more colorful and I'm going to look silly.  It's too bad.  Between wearing a body 'shaper' (I don't) and putting on makeup, the makeup is a lot more fun.

 

My daughter wears a lot more than I ever did.  She prefers the thick cat eyeliner, etc. She does a fine job.  This is with me as an example, so there ya go. 

post #33 of 45

I wear makeup and I love it. Don't ever feel guilty about it!

post #34 of 45
For probably... well, probably since my oldest was born 7 years ago, I would only wear makeup to church. I hated the way it felt on my skin and the way the eye shadow all collected in my crease. I managed to get a small sample of mineral makeup several years ago and LOVED it, but couldn't continue b/c of the price. I've recently found some naturally-based, cruelty-free makeup (including a mascara that even helps _my_ pathetic and puny little lashes) and am now even looking forward to even wearing makeup just for a grocery store trip. orngtongue.gif
post #35 of 45
Nope. Some days I brush my hair though ;-).
post #36 of 45
Quote:
Originally Posted by odalisque View Post
 

I wear makeup and I love it. Don't ever feel guilty about it!

 

Same here.  I love buying it, wearing it, trying new things.  But I also love having a "face" for the world.  I'm more confident.  

 

I tried an olive greenish shadow a few weeks ago when I met a friend and she said "wow, I never realized you had so much green in your eyes!"  After being told my eyes were "s$&# brown" by my mother for 20 years, well it was all the inspiration I needed to try some new colors and punch things up.  

post #37 of 45

I wear makeup, I go for the vegan/cruelty free/mineral brands. I only wear it when I am out of the house (and not always), and more often in the winter months then in the summer when I've gotten some sun. I tend to wear natural-looking/ minimal makeup unless I feel like doing cat eye or heavier makeup occasionally.  The main reason i use it is to "even out" my complexion and to not look so "washed out". I've noticed people ask me if I don't feel well, am tired, or mention that i look washed out if I am not wearing makeup/ haven't gotten any sun!! The funniest thing to me is when i go visit with a friend in another city (I live in a much smaller, more conservative city) She has a lot of women friends who don't wear makeup, and oddly enough I get so many comments from them that I have "great skin!" and that I'm "glowy" or something... Hahah I'm always like... "it's makeup!" and they are always surprised I am wearing makeup, because in their circle it's not a desirable thing to do, and because apparently I'm good at making it subtle. 

 

The only child who watches me put on makeup is my toddler, and he LOVE when I groom. He will come in the bathroom with me, brush his hair, brush his teeth, play with my powder brush, play with his pretend razor/pretend to shave his face (from his dad). I don't find any problem with it at all. I'm sure it's different having an older or tween girl. 

 

 

Edited to say:

 

I went through a phase of not wearing makep for about 7 or 8 years in my mid teens to early 20's, just after I had my kids. My ex/ partner at the time was very controlling and generally had a negative attitude towards women. He also never made me feel desirable or beautiful, and I was feeling like a really frumpy mom at 23 after the birth of my second child. My sister sent me a bunch of organic makeup from the store she manages as a gift, and it made me feel so good- Not because I needed makeup to look good, but it gave me  confidence boost. I still remember a day shortly after she sent it (and I'm just talking mineral powder, mineral eyeshadow, and mascara!). My ex came home and he asked "Where did you learn to put on makeup?" in a friendly tone. I said "oh, I used to wear makeup a long time ago. this isn't much". Then his tone totally changed and he said "well, you look like a RODEO CLOWN". ... Yep, that totally happened. And I totally stayed with him for like 2 more years (and stopped wearing makeup again). SO you can imagine, when I left, I reclaimed that right to look and dress however I wanted and gave me confidence, because yes- that is feminist.

post #38 of 45
Quote:
Originally Posted by mamakitsune View Post I reclaimed that right to look and dress however I wanted and gave me confidence, because yes- that is feminist.

You got it, lady.  :thumb

post #39 of 45
Quote:
Originally Posted by FarmerMomma View Post

Nope. Some days I brush my hair though ;-).


LOL!!!!!

post #40 of 45

I wear make up. I do not really care what anyone thinking of it. My life is too busy to contemplate how it fits into my life ideology and such navel gazing. I work, take care of kids, volunteers, meditate etc. My body and my choice.

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