Making parent friends when you are a working parent
I really resonate with your post and not sure I have anything helpful to offer!! I think these are excellent questions!
I loved the playgroup I attended when my kids were smaller and I was working part time. The women in that play group are still my 'tribe' in my home town. But the same thing does not happen as kids get older. There is the PTO, or parents also involved as theatre parents. It gets much harder when your kids are older and you are working!!
I guess when my kids were really little, I gravitated towards co-workers who also had small kids.
All that being said, I think that once you have kids, the type of frienships you have change. I consider a lot of people to be friends, even though we only get together a few times a year. We are ok with this. Conversations about kids/parenting/child-rearing usually happen at work, or at the kids' activities.
I have had trouble with this too. My only close friends who are parents are in one of two categories: People I already knew (from college or work) who then became parents, and people who go to my church so that we see each other there every week. One of the friends I knew pre-parenthood became a SAHM, but all the others work, and I think that gives us more in common.
I did manage to make friends through La Leche League (my chapter has an evening meeting) who would remember to invite me when they were getting together on weekends, but that dwindled away when my son was around 4 or 5. I think it was not because I'd stopped going to LLL when he was 3 but because they started organizing their social lives via Facebook instead of email, so my boycott of Facebook left me out. I still maintain that if somebody can't remember I'm her friend unless I'm her Facebook friend, that's not a true friend!
Now (we've since moved) I belong to a mommy group that is quite large & includes mostly SAHMs but a good contingent of WOHMs as well. There are a fair number of WOHM events & evening events -- I try to make at least one event each month to stretch my social muscles but I also don't feel bad missing many events. My son is now 5 & he prefers activities with his cousins & friends from school. I met 1 really good friend from the current group & that's good enough for me.
So that's how I cope... I mostly don't but I try not to get down about it. OP, how much activity are you looking to engage in? What would fill your cup right now? If there are no groups in your are, would it be feasible to start an AP or AP working moms group on meetup?