I've been following this thread closely...I read TCC just after my older daughter was born and loved it, and was lucky enough to become friends with several other families who were trying to be as continuum as possible. I have since moved to another state and am having a hard time recreating what I used to have. I re-read TCC last summer while I was pregnant, and it resonated with me even more the second time around, despite my seeing many more flaws than in the first read.
I wanted to respond to a few things in the thread:
Originally Posted by kakies
So I came up with the idea of feeding my baby only things things that she would be capable of eating on her own; in it's natural form.
I did this...I think it's a little strange to sit down and spoon food into my child's mouth three times per day. So I never fed her, but offered her food she could handle and let her take what she wanted. I think a lot of people see their children exhibiting interest in food and think they must feed them, but in my experience it's usually not about hunger. My daughter experimented for a while around six months, and then lost/regained interest over the next few months, but didn't eat much at all until after she was one.
Originally Posted by muse
Even the parents I connect with on most parenting approaches, I DON'T connect with in terms of day to day "activities" for our children. They do lots of stuff like gym class, soft play centers, zoo trips, playgrounds, etc etc. I feel sometimes like a "bad mama" because I can't stand doing that stuff but really it feels totally against my instincts to set up my day around a "child-friendly" activity where I'm dragging along behind or sitting there chatting when I'd rather be getting on with my life....
This is something I am really struggling with as well. I don't think that classes are inherently bad, but it feels wrong to be paying for my child to aquire a random skill, or worse yet, pay just to socialize! (I will, however, offer my kids certain lessons in the future, because I loved the music and dance I was exposed to as a child, and lessons are the way to get that in our culture.) And I hate going to the playground alone with my daughter...I just don't want to play that way. I don't mind going once a week or so with certain friends, if it means I get to visit, but it's still not ideal.
One thing that two of my friends and I are starting is a work share day. We're still figuring out details, but we want to rotate houses and do work each time. So we could bring laundry with us to do, for instance, while the kids are all playing. We'll see how it goes in reality.
Originally Posted by nankilicious
If your instinct is to be a nervous wreck about giving a chokeable item, then dont do it, even if your instinct may be "tainted" by your nonCC culture. Instinct is instinct. IMHO.
I think this is an important point, especially when considering the impact of our expectations. I think, though, that we need to examine those "tainted instincts" from a CC perspective (but given the parameters of whatever culture/society we live in) and really try to let go of the ones that don't feel right to us.
I recently agreed to host a playgroup I'm a part of (which is ap but not cc and has been driving me crazy ever since we all moved inside for winter, but that's another post). Only one woman showed up, and she spent the entire time telling her son how dangerous things in my house were. For instance, he was pointing to drinking glasses on the counter, which he couldn't even reach, and she would say, "Oh, no, honey, that's dangerous. That's glass, danger, danger." She was a perfectly nice woman, but the entire time she was here was like that, and I had a really hard time being around it. Plus, I don't want my daughter exposed to that. And, sort of OT, I really dislike it when other people tell her to be careful or that something is dangerous, especially when I'm right there looking at her.
I have more to write but need to go nurse my baby. One last question. Does anyone else have a hard time recommending TCC? I think there's a lot in the book that can put a person off (the description of what a baby goes through in a typical hospital birth scenario, the homosexuality issue, etc) and so I get nervous when I suggest it or lend it to someone. I just want them to get as much out of it as I did, and take the other stuff with a grain of salt, y'know?
This really could have its own forum. There are just too many topics to discuss from a CC perspective for one thread.