Dh/SO's attitudes on bf?

[Gidget]

I was just wondering about everyone elses partners attitudes on bf and if they have changed during the course of your own bf journey. My dh was "supportive" in the first days with dd. I do not think he thought too much on it when ds was born 9 years ago. But he was proud that I was bf'ing dd. Then after 6 or so months he started wondering out loud when Iwas going to wean. Now, with number three, he is glad that I am still bf. Now that he knows how good it is for baby and that formula is not the close second many(myself included with my first child) think it to be. I did not realize the change until the other day he came home from work and told me about a girl he saw there with her baby. He was the same age as our third one. He said the child was small and looked sickly and the first thing he wondered was if she ff'ed her baby. Now i was pretty thrilled. Not that he assumed that the sick baby was sick due to formula, but that he was thinking of bf outside of our family. Neat. Anyone else have similar stories to share?

Ginger

[jadegirl553]

wow, that's such a great story!

My DH always shows off DS at work whenever we pick him up or drop him off. DS isn't really chubby, but he's very healthy looking, and active and strong, so his co workers are always saying- "what are you feeding him?" And DH just beams and says, "That's a breastfed baby!" It's really cute!

[onlyboys]

There's a new study about breastmilk and infant death going around and I emailed it to my husband at work.

He passed it along to others.

I think he may be a closet lactivist.



I'm so in love with him.

[zoebugsmom]

Whenever my SO sees another babe he compares the babe to ours. Of course ours is superior in his mind and he says "it's all because she's bf!" It cracks me up because I never would have figured he'd be a lactivist.

[karlin]

Last week we were having lunch with one of DH's coworkers, and she said to me, "How long do you plan on breastfeeding?" Dh just chimed in, "Oh, he'll be weaned by the time he goes to college."

[loving-my-babies]

my dh thinks I am a good mom because of bf fulltime and I like it.
He is SO careful when manipulating breastmilk (when I pump, since I work p/t dh feeds our son ebm) the other day, he told our dd "be careful, Valentina, I can't spill this, it's liquid gold" (because I keep telling him to be very careful since we can't waste breastmilk because it's liquid gold"

he is really supportive...

[sincitymama]

My dh has totally come around since I first was pregnant. He never had anything against it, just had zero experience with it. He told me later that one of his first thoughts when I told him the news was 'how will we ever afford the formula?!'. I, on the other hand, was completely baffled when people started asking how I was planning to feed the baby. I mean like Duh, with my boobs, isn't that generally how it works? :LOL I hadn't thought much past the first few months, and in my family babies are always nursed at least at the beginning. And we have a lot of babies. I really had no concept of people using formula unless they had to.

So when it came up he asked why. I told him it's a million times healthier. He did some reading, found out I was understating the benefits, and was 100% on board. Now when I mention other babies we know being weaned he'll say things like Suzy Q?! Isn't she only 10mo old?

So now we both are committed to at least 2 years, bare minimum. I'm not sure how he'll feel when ds is 3, or older, but honestly I'm not sure how I'll feel either. We'll cross that bridge when we get htere, you know? Right now he's only 5mo and we both know we're still at the very beginning of the journey.

baby crying, there's a way to shut me up.

[grnbn76]

I have one of the best husbands in the universe.
At first, he didn't really care one way or the other, as long as the baby got fed.
Now....after nursing both our boys, after having them never get sick, after seeing them grow and thrive and be so wonderful and smart...he is a bigger lactivist than I am!!!
He thinks absolutely nothing of waking up with one of our children, changing the diaper, laying them down next to me, pulling up my shirt, and helping the baby latch on. All while I blissfully snore.
He knows more about appropriate latch than most LLL leaders I know...and will help a new nursing mother in a heartbeat.
He calls formula "fake baby milk", and tsk tsks when someone says they are planning on ff without even trying to bf.
He is 100% supportive of our friend who HAS to ff (her dd has a genetic disorder and doesn't grow without a very special formula), and is just as supportive of her plan to bf her forthcoming baby.
He gives expectant dads tips on being supportive of a bfing mom, on which breastpads to stock up on, on which pumps are good, how to prepare ebm, on how to hold a baby while you feed a bottle of ebm.
He recently told me "You know, I hate the Wiggles more than life itself, but if they ever come here, we're going to see them. They have a link to the Australian Breastfeeding Association. We have to support them, since they are so supportive of bfing."
He just bought a bumper sticker for the car that is some kind of bfing advocacy...I haven't even seen it yet.

Yep...he's a lactivist. And VERY proud of it!

[momto l&a]

My dh thinks bfing is beautiful!

He tells me that I often while I am nursing

[Sustainer]

Originally Posted by grnbn76

He just bought a bumper sticker for the car that is some kind of bfing advocacy

You know, I sell breastfeeding advocacy bumper stickers, and it seems like the majority of my customers are men! Either that, or it's a whole bunch of women using their husbands'/partners' paypal accounts.

I LOVE this thread -- I've been smiling all the way through it.

My partner has always been supportive of my breastfeeding. He has never had a problem with me overtly breastfeeding in public. He completely supports me breastfeeding my 3 1/2 year old and child-led-weaning.

[Persephone]

My df is totally on board. He was breastfed, and so was I. I actually self weaned at 2. And that was 20 years ago! He loves boobs, and jokes about being jealous of the baby, but I know that he loves it that I want to breastfeed.

[soccerchic21]

My DH was along for the ride in the beginning. I had a really really hard time with DD not gaining weight and supplementing when I should have just listened to my baby and breastfed her more. He then would go to LLL meetings with me. Then at about 6 months he was wondering when I was going to wean and couldn't imagine me breastfeeding a 2 year old even though I could.

Now he is completely different. He loves that I breastfeed although now that I have a part-time job and he gives DD EBM while I am gone in a bottle he says he loves how he can feed her and have her fall asleep in his arms. She is 10 months and I feel bad that he has missed a lot of what I have gotten to enjoy this whole time (DD would not take a bottle from about 3 months until just recently)

Anyway he is very very supportive.

[wednesday]

My husband is extremely supportive. He is a SAHD and feeds our son (8 months) EBM that I pump while I'm at work. Sometimes when I have felt very frustrated with pumping I have brought up the idea of supplementing with formula at some point--he always gives me a pep talk and tells me I can keep going. (Just to explain, I can't pump enough while I'm at work--I have to pump more at night and on the weekends just to have enough for the work week, PLUS little guy just started drinking an entire fourth bottle every day and my freezer stash is totally running out!) I am so grateful that DH supports me in this because in my heart I know I want our son to have my milk for at least a year. If my husband ever said, "Sure, formula is fine," or even *encouraged* me to give up I think I would find it so much harder to keep at it. I just know I would regret it later though.

[mom2threenurslings]

I'm not sure I would have breastfed at all if it hadn't been for my dh! When I got pregnant he said, "You're going to breastfeed, right?" I said, "I guess so." He is the son of a La Leche League Leader and heard about breastfeeding all of his life. He just assumed his wife would breastfeed because that's just what you do! I was ff, grew up babysitting ff kids and only saw 2 people nurse infants in my entire life.

Dh has been very supportive of the "extreme breastfeeding" that has gone on in our house When I got pregnant when my first was 9 months old, he supported my decision (ok, my son's decision!) to nurse through the pregnancy and tandem nurse. When I got pregnant when my second was 14 months old, he supported me in tandem nursing through pregnancy and triandem nursing. Our oldest weaned after 18 months of triandem nursing (on his fifth birthday...his choice!) and my husband said it was wierd that one of our children wasn't nursing anymore!

[rareimer]

dh didn't know much at all about it when we first had jasmyn, but was nothing but supportive. alot of it was financial at first too--no way he was paying for formula, so we'd better breastfeed!

we've both learned alot since then, and although he sometimes rolls his eyes at my lactivist ways, he is quite the little lactivist himself. the first thing he always wonders (or asks) when he sees someone who is pregnant or has a new baby is if they are breastfeeding. and then he quickly volunteers me to "coach" them, should they need any help. he is very proud of jasmyn and how healthy and happy she is, and he knows breastfeeding has been a major player in that. he sees how happy she is when she nurses, and how close we are, and although he was never breastfed himself, can't see doing anything else with a baby.

i'm not sure if there will be any point when he gets uncomfortable with how "old" she is while still nursing...but so far, he has been nothing but an awesome support system. i wish every mother was lucky enough to have a partner like him in her life, it makes breastfeeding that much easier and more rewarding when your partner is on the same page.

[Icequeen_in_ak]

My DH is supportive, but is somewhat resentful at the same time.

I think he feels so left out because there are times when the only thing that will sooth DD is the breast. She's been so fussy lately because she's teething, and has been unusually clingy and constantly nursing.

I see how it breaks my DHs heart for him to try to console her and she just screams and holds out her arms for me.

I wish men could lactate equally But then again.... most men probably couldn't handle it

[Colorful~Mama]

my dh is a total lactivist. He always knew it was the perfect food and found my nursing 'beautiful' - he would take pictures of me nursing dd (and now ds), videotape. He told his father at christmas when he got uncomfortable "dad, she's going to be nursing a few years, and she's not leaving so you'll be in another room alot if you don't get used to it now"
i was so proud.
I nursed dd till she was just shy of 2. Ds is 9.5mos now and dh is still amazingly supportive. Once there was some stuff on the radio and they were talking bout that crap about bfing in bathrooms - my dh CALLED IN! and YELLED at them!! Told them to eat THEIR lunch in the restroom cuz his son wasn't going to. That they were NUTS cuz they have this warped view that breasts are for their sexual pleasure instead of how G-d intended them - for a babies nutrition.

He told them they were ignorant fools and he hoped they'd grow up soon

yay for my dh!

[SarahMorgan]

My dh has never been supportive. The only support I have had has been from the computer. He wont even talk to me about extended nursing, he thinks thats nasty. Oh well, I have let him know that Hannah will self wean so he had better get used to it. He also has always hated when I NIP, but I dont care of course and do it anyway. He also blames bfing on things, thats why she was colicky, thats why she doesnt sleep, thats why she is crabby, thats why she is skinny, thats why she wont go to anyone but myself and him, bla bla bla. Its never ending.

[Icequeen_in_ak]

SarahMorgan - wow... I'm so sorry!!! I'm very greatful that places like this exist and I'm very proud of you for standing up for what you believe in!!!!!

Colorful mama - PLEASE feel free to tell you DH that I have to say that HE ROCKS!!!! I certainly wish there were so many more men in the world like him! Especially when I'm getting dirty looks for NIP (even under a blanket!)

[umbrella]

My dh was supportive, but early on, wanted me to hide away if ever I had to nurse outside of home. He would want to me go to the car, AND cover with a blanet, in case someone passed the car. I felt like I was being ostracized and punished for doind the right thing for my baby. I went along for a little while, trying to slowly make him comfortable. Well, it wasn't happening quickly enough for me, so I just flat out refused to go hide away to feed my baby one day. That was that. He got over it.