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kinda freaking out!!

post #1 of 5
Thread Starter 
My 2nd ds is 8 months and I got my 1st PPAF last month. With ds1 I didn't get AF until 15 months, and then it still took 5 months to get pg and have it stick (I had really long cycles and a short LP, plus I had one chem pg and an early m/c so I conceived every cycle but 1). This time I am tandem nursing and I got AF WAY earlier. I figured that I probably wasn't fertile, or that my cycles would be long, and really I have just been to busy to even remember that it was something I had to worry about. We knew we were being careless, but it really didn't phase us. We haven't though about actually preventing a pg in almost 4 years.

Turns out I had a big temp spike today and I probably O'ed yesterday. We bd the day before. I am scared that I might be pg. We wanted to wait till dh was done school before having another one. We are struggling financially already. We live in a teeny tiny house, our car is not running well, and we can't afford to get it registered or insured again (plus we couldn't fit a 3rd car seat in it anyway). We aren't even making ends meet each month, so when dh starts school again in Sept we are really in trouble without his full time paychecks.

I get pregnant SO easily!! I am sure it will work out whatever happens, but I am in panic mode right now. Thanks for reading my freak-out
post #2 of 5
I hope it turns out for the best...
post #3 of 5
Just wanted to voice my solidarity with you, mama. This is hard to have to worry about while you're taking care of two little ones. It's rough when your cycle gets so unpredictable after the postpartum period! I'll say a prayer for you.

I had a similar worry last week. The test came out neg, but AF is still late and I feel fatigued. I'm considering getting a blood test from my GYN just to be 100% sure. Hoping it's just BF'ing throwing my body for a loop.
post #4 of 5
Thread Starter 
Thanks!! I am kind of excited about the possibility now. I am officially "late". Test was negative though so I guess only time will tell for sure
post #5 of 5
Before ds was born, every time we were uncertain about whether or not I was pg, dh and I had a heartfelt talk to prepare ourselves emotionally that this could be a major turning point. Then for the many times it did not turn out to be the real thing, we'd just go back to normal life. But by the time ds arrived all the huge life-changes were buffered by the fact that we had imagined and anticipated a baby long before he actually came. I think the unpredictability of birth is not only a kind of grace working in our lives, but as a new mom it turned out for me to be a way to prepare for parenting through experiencing the anxiety and excitement of all those would-be pregnancies.

Anyway, I just went through another cycle of puzzlement-worry-panic-comfort-excitement-openness-gratitude-hope-and-relief. AF paid a visit today!

We're going to be a *lot* more careful, though, from now on. Part of me thinks it would be great to have 2 kids close in age. But I'm really hoping for at least 3 yrs child-spacing, if we can swing it...
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