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What's Wrong with Strollers? - Page 3

post #41 of 88
Foobar, people used to look at me like I was crazy when I talked to DD in her stroller, too. Maybe because she was facing away from me and I was looking like I was talking to nobody? I don't know! Maybe because people didn't think that it was "normal" to carry on a conversation with a baby?

I also did not know about good baby slings when Dd was a baby. The only one I tried was the "mainstream" Nojo one, and it was too big for me and I never got the hang of it. I couldn't afford a Bjorn, so I gave up on carriers.

Just like every other piece of baby equipment out there, a stroller is a useful item that shouldn't be abused. A mom who is going to ignore her baby for long stretches is not doing it because she has a stroller or a bouncy seat or a playpen. She would do it anyway, so at least the equipment keeps the kid safe.

Oh, and don't be so quick to judge a mom with a crying baby in a stroller. There were a few times when DD and I were out and she was tired, and I was trying to get her out to the car as quickly as possible so I could get her home. Carrying a flailing toddler in one arm while pushing a stroller full of packages is no easy feat, so even though it looked bad to others, plopping her in there and beelining it to the nearest exit was the best course of action.
post #42 of 88
we use our stroller as one of many things in our repetriore to keep our high need DD happy. if my dh were physically capable (he has MS) he would carry her all day long. but he has horrible back pain and needs a break. (he is a sahd.) for awhile the only way she would nap (we tried the sling) was if we took her for a walk in it around our neighborhood for an hour.

i would never get to jog if it weren't for my jogging stroller, my dd loves how fast we go and when that time of day comes around and we take her out to be strapped in, she giggles and babbles. i really cannot talk to her while we're running, but she really doesn't care. and i think it gives her a break from the stimulation she gets all day being with me or her dad.

i agree with everyone who said that they have a place, but should not be overused.
post #43 of 88
For us, there was never really a choice of stroller or sling. DS was very vocal about which one he wanted. For the first year, he usually preferred the sling over the stroller. Now he's 2 1/2...he refuses to use the sling, likes to be carried, sometimes walks, and for long walks likes to go in the stroller.

My child zoned out in the sling. And he zones out in the stroller. When he's done zoning, he jumps out of the stroller and is ready to walk....

I think it's bad to judge parents you don't know on how they transport their kid. But I must admit I do stereotype. I think of AP stroller-parents as having cheap carefree umbrella strollers. I think of mainstream parents as having those huge strollers (usually double) with fifty compartments, laying-down capabilities, cup holders, diaper bag holders, etc. Of course, I was thinking that this morning and at the museum, my AP friend and her sister were there. Her sister's AP and had the big huge stroller. So my stereotype is probably not based on fact or reality.

Dina
post #44 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by thirtycats
I think of AP stroller-parents as having cheap carefree umbrella strollers. I think of mainstream parents as having those huge strollers (usually double) with fifty compartments, laying-down capabilities, cup holders, diaper bag holders, etc. Of course, I was thinking that this morning and at the museum, my AP friend and her sister were there. Her sister's AP and had the big huge stroller. So my stereotype is probably not based on fact or reality.
well, i could agree with that, except that you can't use an umbrella stroller until they have really good neck control. we have one that we got as a shower gift and my 6 mo dd _still_ isn't strong enough to use it... so its the big, cumbersome graco for us!
post #45 of 88
Ya know, I really wish I could sling ds everywhere. I really do. The freakin' jogging stroller (only one big enough to suit his needs) is heavy, hard to steer, and taking up a crapload of room in my car.

BUT, first off, he weighs over 35 lbs, too big for most slings. Secondly, my back goes out if I blink wrong. I guess dh could sling him......except last time we tried to put him in the sling, he just plain wasn't having it, and flipped himself out of it. Thank goodness we were at home standing next to the couch! And here's the biggie........Aidan has autism, along with which comes major problems processing sensory input. A large, confining stroller helps block some of that out. If it didn't, he'd either be in full out meltdown, or nearly comatose from trying to shut everything out. So, he walks for awhile, then gets in the stroller for a while, to calm down.

I'm doing what is best for MY child. And isn't that what AP IS???? Treating each child as an individual, and meeting THEIR needs, not the one size fits all, cookie cutter model of parenting that says EVERY child needs XYZ.
post #46 of 88
Stroller here. My ds weighted 30lbs at 4months and I have a terrible back. Besides, he loves his stroller. He sticks both his legs up and plays with his feet the whole time
post #47 of 88
My strollers are all gigantic behemoths. I have a jogging stroller, 2 "all terrain" 4 wheeled strollers with a million compartments and I just gave away my carriage.
I hate umbrella strollers. Setting the 35 lb weight limit aside, they are impossible to push, uncomfortable for my ds and flimsy as all get out. I love my jogger for walks any farther than the store. My son isn't autistic, but he does need a place to mellow out when we are out. The jogger works well for that and if he falls asleep, I can recline it.
Oh, and DS is 40 lbs, and recently turned 2. Carrying him is pretty much impossible.

Steph
post #48 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by Piglet68
Well, other than a couple of reactive posts that seem to have died down now...I really hope this thread puts to rest the MYTH that you can't be AP and use a stroller. I honestly don't know where stuff like this comes from.

The only issue I have with strollers is that so many parents don't realize that there are other ways to transport a baby. And I feel bad for them, as in they don't know what they are missing. I don't think they are crappy parents.

Frankly, slinging a baby is just so much more interactive. While we did get a stroller when DD was 8 months old, and we still use it at the zoo, long walks, etc...I find it odd to have her facing away from me. And when the sunhood is up (necessary in summertime) I can only see her through the little window in the back of the hood. I really DO feel that I can't interact with her, and I miss how we used to be able to do that when I was slinging her. Mostly we walk together, which is lovely. But when I see mamas with tiny babies in strollers, I often wonder if they have any idea what a pleasure it can be to sling a baby. I hate it when I see newborns in those combo things that are carseat and stroller together with the two sunshades that meet in the middle so basically the baby sees NOTHING and nobody sees it, either. I'm sure they have their reasons, and I don't need to hear long posts about all the possible reasons why. It just makes me sad, that's all.

And I do think strollers are usually a pain in the butt - always have to search for the elevators instead of taking the stairs. Difficulty navigating narrow store aisles, etc. Still, I'm just not up to slinging my 2 year old much, especially now that I'm pregnant. And she really does love her stroller. She gets very protective of it.


the park i live by is frequented by "yuppie" mothers. i put k in her sling and take her for walks around the lake; on one side is the playground, where there always seem to be 3 million children. and there are TONS of strollers, many with the bucket clipped in and the sunguards completely over them. it seems sad to me, too, to know there is a babe in there who is completely cut off from interacting with the world. k wouldn't have it, i know.
post #49 of 88
I felt very fortunate that ds was so light for so long. When he turned 1yo, he just weighed 18lbs. So I was able to carry/bjorn/sling him for a long time (he didn't always love the sling though). Now at 3yo he is just getting too heavy for me to carry him for long (plus I'm 7months pregnant), but he can walk a lot more now. So although we have definitely used strollers, I've been lucky enough to not have to rely on them all that much.

I have a friend who had her baby at the same time I had ds, and she was the most dedicated AP person I know (she is actually the one that introduced me to AP as an official thing!). She was adamant about slinging 100% of the time. Her daughter was sooooo heavy, and still she would sling her everywhere. Finally by 6 months old (her dd was 25lbs +), she gave up and started using a stroller here and there. It was really hard for her, I know, because she was so against them the whole time. But the sling was just too hard on her a lot of the time.

Quote:
many with the bucket clipped in and the sunguards completely over them. it seems sad to me, too, to know there is a babe in there who is completely cut off from interacting with the world.
I have definitely used the carseat carrier/stroller combo, but I never understood the whole thing about completely covering the kid. For a long time I just assumed that it was because they were asleep and mom wanted to protect them from sun/wind/noise or whatever. But then most times when I peeked in, the baby was awake! I found it rather shocking.
post #50 of 88
so sad, the little baby being all cut off from the world. that makes me mad to see that, b/c unless the baby is in direct sunlight, or snow or rain or wind, that lid ought to be open so they can see their world.
i wanted to comment on people looking at me funny *not something that is new to me, btw, lol* when i talk to dd...i've carried/slung her from birth to about 12 months everywhere i went, from 12 months on, she's wanted to walk. anyway, i always get strange looks when i speak to her (always have)-i talk to her very kindly, respectfully, and articulately, as though she understands me. she does. it's sucky people don't talk to their babies. i'm getting some sweet vindication now that she's verbal. it's always priceless, to see the looks on those people's faces change to awe when she talks back, like today in the craft store, "maya, honey, mama really wants for you to walk where I can see you. I respect your freedom, and that you really want to run and look around, but I need you to be where I can see you, ok?"
"ok mama." (she stayed closer to me, and the remainder of the time we were there, would look over her shoulder to make sure she could see me)
"would you like to push the cart?"
"maya pusha cart, mmmhmm! push it dood. push to da animals. maya hold two animals. pet them. riiiiiiiiiiiiight there."
"yes, lovey, you can push that cart great, and we can go see the animals and hold them and pet them."
i know. it's cheap. i am such a butthead for gloating at the looks she garners. i'm just so proud, and i'm happy that she shocks people into being nice instead of looking at me like i have 2 heads. i know that the way i (and dh) have raised her, talking to her, including her in the world, talking about what we see, how things work, that's helped to make her the bright, talkative, inquisitive, lovey,funny little person she is now.
post #51 of 88
The thing where they don't know any other way really gets me. I was on the bus the other day, and there was this young couple (by which I mean they were somewhere between 16 and 25, younger than me anyway) with a baby who was maybe 2 months old at most. The man had the stroller part of the "travel system" in front of him, folded up as is required for bringing it on the bus. They had the baby in the bucket between them, and the woman was feeding her a bottle while she was in the bucket.

I sat across from them nursing my DD in her Kozy, thinking they were nuts for carrying all that stuff for a baby that couldn't way much more than 10 lbs., and also wishing I had the guts to suggest the woman actually hold her child while feeding her.

I carry a small diaper bag and my DD, and sometimes a bookbag when we're heading to the library. I bring the bucket along, carried empty, when there's a chance we'll be able to get a ride home from a friend from wherever it is we're going.

I don't have enough hands to carry a diaper bag, a folded up stroller, a baby, and a carseat. And having to take everything, including baby, out of the stroller and fold it up to get on the bus... I see people struggle with this frequently, and feel bad for them.

I do use my stroller when we walk to the grocery store, which is about a mile and a half walk each way. DD rides in the stroller (something of a novelty for her still, and today she made it all the way there w/out complaint and shifting to carrier for the first time) on the way there as long as she's happy, then I wear her and the groceries ride in the stroller on the way home.

She weighs about 16 lbs. now, and by the end of the day when we're out on the bus I do get tired, but with the heat here I'd get tired if I was empty-handed. I have to use a wrist brace if I push the stroller for more than a few minutes, and I can't carry DD w/ out a sling for more than a couple of minutes because of my wrists.

I think strollers definitely have their place. Especially for moms with more than one little one. In the airport it's nice to have a luggage cart for carry-ons you can take through the security checkpoint. That said, as I only have the one baby I'm going to leave my stroller at home on my next plane trip. I'm also not going to overpack like I did the first time I flew with her, so it won't be overwhelming.

And I don't go anywhere near most public restroom changing tables. A folding plastic mat on the floor in the corner, on a park bench, etc., does the trick. I also use the plastic mat when we DO use the public restroom changing tables, except at the library where they actually provide liners.

And the bs about the security checkpoints goes for everyone. You're not being singled out in your hijab. It's a good thing I had the stroller along the first time I flew w/ DD as she couldn't sit up yet and they made me put her down so they could run the wand over me.

I took off my shoes at the security checkpoint then didn't put them on again until it was time to board the plane--and then only because someone in a uniform told me I had to.
post #52 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by Piglet68
Well, other than a couple of reactive posts that seem to have died down now...I really hope this thread puts to rest the MYTH that you can't be AP and use a stroller. I honestly don't know where stuff like this comes from.
From people who make it a point to say that they don't use a stroller when they are giving the laundry list of AP things they do. I've heard it a number of times through the years.

The big thing for me about having a stroller is now I have this huge piece of junk I will have to get rid of some day. Well, actually, I have 3 strollers, but two of them I can probably give away to someone. The other one really is just junk.

The funny thing is that I rarely use strollers. I don't even use the sling as much anymore. My daughter only seems to like to be in it when she is sleepy, so I've gotten out of the habit of using it around the house as much. I end up putting her down on the floor all the time because it is the path of least resistance, ya' know? I feel like if I have to carry her everywhere and do stuff, it's just easier not to do stuff. But I've used the sling recently at Disneyland, and I've always used a sling instead of a stroller in the airport. I even used the sling at the National Zoo when my daughter was 3. I just find it handier, but many moms find the stroller handier.

I did like the stroller when she was a baby and I could put the carrier up in the stroller so she was high up and could face me. This time around I didn't do that, I just used the sling in the snuggle hold and it works really well.

Anyway, the biggest reason not to have a stroller is that one day your baby will be a 5 year old and everytime you try to get her to take a walk with you, she will insist on being pushed in the stroller, the same stroller that she hated when she was 2 and that caused her to act as if she was being eaten alive by bears just to have to ride in it, causing you to have to work out a different way to take your walks, and sometimes that way was walking for a half a mile or mile at a two year old's pace, but now that your child can walk more quickly and maybe needs a little more exercise than she has been getting, apparently the legs on the ground, moving back and forth, back and forth so as to convey her along in a typical human fashion, well, that is like being eaten alive by bears.
post #53 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by Throkmorton
Oh, and DS is 40 lbs, and recently turned 2. Carrying him is pretty much impossible.
Dayum! Yeah, that would be tough. I could carry my daughter short distances (not in a sling) when she was 4 and just under 40 lbs, but somehow we turned a corner. She is about 42 lbs now and I feel like I can barely lift her anymore. But I think if she were 40 lbs at 2, that would be even harder.
post #54 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by Throkmorton
Oh, and DS is 40 lbs, and recently turned 2. Carrying him is pretty much impossible.

Steph
I completely feel your pain. DD just turned two on May 6 and weighs 45 lbs. Like I said, it makes me so sad that I cannot carry her as much as she would like.

We got rid of our stroller about 5 mos ago.
post #55 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by UmmZaynab
Is it my imagination or do people really look at me like I'm crazy when I have my baby in the sling and I am talking away to her? Maybe most people don't talk to their babies?

Umm Zaynab
no i find the same thing iven even been seen talking away to jack even though he had since fallen asleep ... i do notice that it happens much much more when its just the 2 of us at the store if lexi stays at home. apparently i'm not so weird for discussing produce choices with a 4 yo
post #56 of 88
We relied on the stroller by and large for sleeping babes and toddlers. Our boys were (are) on the heavy side and after about 6 months it was hard to sling them while they were dead sleeping weight, and I appriciated letting my torso breath a little while slept in the stroller! So we'd bring the stroller places and let it hold our bags and jackets, and then lay the baby down when he fell asleep. And as toddlers, we always gave the option of, "If you feel tired you can ride in the stroller." Also there have been phases where I've need to say, "If you run away from mommy in the store then you will have to ride in the stroller."

There are 2 situations I can think of where other people's stroller use *really* bothers me. One is when the baby is crying and the parent doesn't pick them up out of the stroller. The other is when parents habitually push seriously overweight toddlers or preschoolers in the stroller. I just think to myself, "That child needs to WALK!" I have customers in the store where I work who do this -- who have 3 or 4 year old children wearing a size 8 or 10, and I never see the child actually walking!
post #57 of 88
I feel there is a place for strollers, and perhaps that place is different for every family. For us, we use the jog stroller regularly for runs with dd, and have been since she was first able to sit up. She/we love it - we live in the mountains and getting out on the dirt road to visit nearby lakes, watch the changing seasons, often watch animals, etc etc is a special time in our days. I love running - and dd loves coming along, collecting rocks and leaves along the way, talking about what she sees, etc etc. Without the jog stroller, I would not be as patient or sane a mother - those runs are very centering for me! Of course, dd gets lots of ambulatory exploration time each day too! Other than that, when we are out and about doing errands, traveling, etc, we used the sling until she could walk - and wanted to walk. Love it for its closeness, simplicity, security, etc, etc.

One issue I have not seen mentioned yet in this thread is our culture's (for those of us who live in the US) obesity. If a child is pushed everywhere in a stroller until he/she is five years old or even older, it seems natural that once they finally truly outgrow the stroller there is a deep pattern of not walking anywhere - and a resistance to changing that. If a parent is carrying a child, that is self-limiting; the child will become too big to carry and will have to walk at some point. It is a small thing, but one of many small things that probably act together to encourage our sedentary and overweight lifestyles and attitudes. That is not to say that stollers have no place, just point out another negative in using them ALL the time, and especially with older kids.
post #58 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by mamaduck
I just think to myself, "That child needs to WALK!" I have customers in the store where I work who do this -- who have 3 or 4 year old children wearing a size 8 or 10, and I never see the child actually walking!
I wonder if that is part of why they got so heavy in the first place. Perhaps their parents have always found it easier to confine the child to a stroller, and this is one of the repurcussions. That is one of the things I was trying to convey in my post, though, the fact that my 5 year old should walk but wants to ride, but this is when I am going for a long walk, which happened to us the other day. I guess she dislikes my walks, but she used to want to take them with me. I can get her to exercise when I make things a game, or even when I'm using the treadmill and weights in my basement exercise room. Last night she was showing me all sorts of different ways to exercise. She wants to go with me when I take a walk, but asking her to walk? Anathema! She doesn't want to stay home, nor does she want to walk a long distance I usually do leave her at home, but my MIL pushed her in the stroller the other day while I carried Jess in the sling. But Molly took a walk later with Grampa.
post #59 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by kristi (kd)
One issue I have not seen mentioned yet in this thread is our culture's (for those of us who live in the US) obesity. If a child is pushed everywhere in a stroller until he/she is five years old or even older, it seems natural that once they finally truly outgrow the stroller there is a deep pattern of not walking anywhere - and a resistance to changing that.
That is what I was trying to say in my first post, but I was being silly in the way I said it, as I am in most things.
post #60 of 88
I probably posted this in the wrong spot...sorry:

Quote:
NAIROBI, Kenya -- Irene Wambui can't imagine why anyone would buy a baby stroller. She says she sees it as a cold cage filled with useless rattles, cup holders and mirrored headlights. Imagine children being stuffed into such a contraption and pushed around town like some kind of pet.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/ac2/wp...2004May17.html

I just started a thread in TAO about East African women saying strollers are horrible devices and they do not allow their children to 'sit like lumps' which is what they perceive a child does in a stroller.
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