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June Mamas May 23-29 - Page 3

post #41 of 171
I used to post a lot, but I find lately that I don't really have much to say. Like Rynna, I am due 6/30 so my edd is still a long way off compared to the rest of you. The more I read about everyone being ready to labor or showing signs, the more paranoid I get that I'll go early. I REALLY want my homebirth, I am terrified of birthing in a hospital. My mw assured me that baby was floating really high up, she said we all know that second babies tend to drop during labor rather than before, but that they still tend to be a little lower than mine is before labor starts. That was comforting. I am barely 35 wks today, my labor support doesn't arrive until June 24, and I am very scared of having a premature baby. So I think that I will probably not be hanging out here as much as I was before. I told dh I have to consciously stop myself from doing cervix opening visualizations-I am not doing hypnobabies, but I did do visualizations like that for Tain and I find myself doing them now when I am not paying attention. So I need to stop focusing on labor and birth for a while.

In other news, I am feeling tired more and I think I took my last bath with ds today. He is going to be upset about it, but I have too much trouble getting out of the tub. Baby has started hitting my cervix and bladder a lot-PIMPH is a private joke between dh and I now. I can definitely commiserate with the shooting pains in my nether regions as well as the occasional pleasurable one, which is just confusing.

I told ds I was tired of him today. I guess I'd feel more guilty about it if I thought he understood, which I am sure he didn't since I didn't use a negative tone and he doesn't comprehend language very well, or if I wasn't so totally tired of him. Dh didn't care for it. Dh doesn't have a toddler accidentally pinching his painfully sensitive nipples all the time or climbing all over him or elbowing him in his immensely large tummy or leaning back on his belly so he can't breathe or throwing fits if he doesn't pick him up. He isn't the only one in the whole house that can possibly kiss an owie or cuddle at night or sit with when ds is grumpy. I am so tired of my son! Dh has been home for a week straight (he's laid off for 2 weeks) and I still do the brunt of the parenting, mostly b/c ds won't allow dh to do anything. I am frustrated, mostly b/c not only did I count on this as a reprieve, which it isn't that much, but also b/c it is painfully clear that I am going to have major issues mothering a mama magnet and a newborn.

My house is a mess, I really don't care at all. I have a bunch of projects to do that I haven't started yet and I don't care. oh, Smithie, would you be able to find someone to make the extensions for you if I sent all the stuff? In my present state, I feel like I am not going to get them done before James gets here and I hate to think about you waiting on them. If there is no hurry, I'm more than happy to do them, I just don't want the pressure of needing to do them NOW, kwim?

My reflux is so bad, but I knew that would happen. I try not to think about it since it is pretty much a constant thing.

I am starting to sleep in increments instead of all at night. It is good when I can do it i.e. ds decides napping is okay, but it is miserable when I am tired (like now) and he refuses to be. I think of it as my body training me again for having a newborn around.

Video games...I feel like the only wife/mother on MDC who doesn't mind them. Dh plays them at night after ds and I go to bed. His usual job was a semi-night shift so he got home late anyway and it helps him de-stress. Sometimes he'll play during the day when we are all just lazing around. It has never been an issue in our marriage or our parenting and it doesn't make him a more violent person or anything. For him, it is a great tool, the way I imagine sewing is for me. If I need him and he is playing, he'll immediately pause it and come back to it later. He'll stop playing if I want to spend time with him. It is all about how you use or abuse them, not the games themselves, IMO.

Well, I got colostrum in, though Adventures in Tandem Nursing (AITN) says it is actually pre-colostrum. At any rate, it doesn't hurt quite so much to nurse ds, but he asks more. He has started asking in the middle of the night again. It is hard to refuse, but I REALLY don't want to be tandem night nursing. Ideally, I'd like to stick with the down to nap, down to bedtime nursing we have now, but I know my ds and once he realizes my milk is back, he'll want to nurse every minute of the day. Don't know how I am going to handle that, I guess we'll have to see how it goes. Hey Rynna, strange question but have you tasted the colostrum you have now? I've only ever tasted mature milk, the really sweet stuff, but the stuff I have now is salty. AITN says that our bodies make "weaning milk" that is really salty and I guess I am trying to figure out if what I have is weaning milk or colostrum b/c it isn't really yellowish like I remember colostrum being. FYI, it also says that the placenta detaching from your uterus releases a signal for your body to stop making so much progesterone which in turn signals your breasts to start making colostrum. So I no longer have to feel like a freak for not having milk/leaking before Tain was born. Get this, it also says that milk drying up is actually caused by elevated progesterone levels during pregnancy, not lower prolactin levels. That is why most remedies like teas don't work b/c they are designed to raise prolactin levels and that isn't the problem. Evidently the progesterone levels are so high they basically cancel out anything you try to do with prolactin. And of course, lowering progesterone levels during pregnancy is not a good idea. This is totally off subject, but I find it fascinating the way our bodies work, how intricate the system is, and how determined it is to function in a certain way.

AITN also mentioned that our mothering hormones at the end of pregnancy/during the babymoon focus on the newborn to the extent that we start to feel less attached/more irritated with our older children. She is always careful to preface these comments with "everyone's experience is different and some may experience the opposite, but this is the general trend..." (paraphrased). I find this to be really helpful lately in finding patience for ds and it helps to know that it won't always be this way, that a little down the road it will even out again. So those of you who are also struggling with your current dc, hopefully that helps a little.

Well, I think I have written a long enough post to get me through another few days, LOL. Good birthing vibes to everyone reading to go...
post #42 of 171
Geez, I feel kinda bad that I am actually doing pretty well for the past few days. Really all that's changed is that my Pubic Symphasis pain is mostly gone, but it makes such a huge difference to not be in constant agony that everyting else is negligible. I am FAR from comfortable, but, for the first time in practically my entire pregnancy, I am actually enjoying being pregnant. I don't think I'm quite ready for it to end.

The moms at Ben's school threw us a little shower today. It was really sweet of them, most everyone chipped in on gift cards for Babies R Us, I think I might go crazy buying little outfits since we've got most of what we need already.

I can't say much about video games, Dan produces them for a living. We do go through phases where he gets a little too involved in one, like now he's a Beta tester for a Massivly Multiplayer game so he wants to play all the time. He is good about only playing when Ben is asleep but he'll stay up until the early hours of the morning and not get enough rest and neglect the dishes and such which I have a huge problem with. We do not have any console systems (PS2 or Xbox and the like) and I plan never to have anything like that. There are plenty of PC games that he can play that are usually higher quality anyway and I really don't want to have gaming in my living room, I can see too many ways that can get out of control.

Gotta go, I promised Ben we'd read stories. Lots of labor vibes to those of you on the cusp and "stay in" vibes for those not ready yet
post #43 of 171
I'm so proud of myself - I declined induction today. My midwife said she was fine with doing an induction, but was totally supportive of waiting awhile longer. She prefers to induce with cytotec rather than pitocin, and I'm not sure based on my research which is the lesser of the two evils. We talked about AROM, but the head doctor at the practice insists that if you don't start contractions within 1-2 hours, that you start on either the pitocin or cytotec. So, that didn't seem like as great of a plan to me, either - I thought that they'd give me longer than that... So, I decided to stick it out for at least a few more days. In fact, I'm going back to work this week and am going to fling myself into packing/housecleaning, so hopefully being very active will get things going.

Anyone know a first time mom that went several days at 6cm / 90% effaced / 0 station??? I've been that way since last Friday, and I just can't imagine that I'll stay this way much longer... neither can my midwife! It has to happen soon, right?
post #44 of 171
Julie, I also feel like I don't have much to say either! I'm not due until the 21st and although dd was born at 37+3 weeks I'm certainly not convinced that this one will come early. I've actually been thinking that it's possible that this baby could come in July! That seems worlds away to me. This whole pregnancy I've been so worried about going prematurely. Now that I'm at 36 weeks I don't worry about it any more. I'm sure you won't go early either. I know what you mean about taking baths! I relax so much in the tub, but dang, I can hardly pull myself out. Oh, and the reflux. I can't tell you how many times in the last few weeks I've awakened choking on vomit. It is not pleasant. As for the colostrum, I tasted mine one night. My dd gave up nursing back at the start of my 2nd trimester, so mine may be different than yours, but yuck! It tasted awful. Nothing like breastmilk! Please don't stay away too much! We'll miss you!

QoC, I think you made the right decision. Only allowing 1-2 hours after AROM! Jeesh, that seems a bit ridiculous to me. After my water broke, I didn't feel a contraction for 7 hours. Of course, by the time I started feeling them I was in transition, which you're almost in now! Anyway, try to hang in there and don't feel guilty about any decision you make if you feel it's truly the right thing to do. I'm sure you'll be holding your sweet little baby in no time!
post #45 of 171
Queenie, I'm so glad you got a straight answer about it all from the birth center. I wish I had known all that before I agreed to the AROM, I would have waited, too. I do know lots of mommas who hung out way dilated for a long time, it's probably more common than most of us know, since most don't get checked until closer to their EDD's. I have no idea how long I was dilated before having Ben, I was technically about 38 wks when first checked, but had probably been that way for a while. I just keep thinking how fast your birth will probably be, since you have such a tiny bit left to dilate fully. Not to mention that you must have amniotic sacs of steel to be still intact Maybe your babe will be born in the caul!! Great idea to throw yourself into packing; all the little tasks I keep finding to do have definitely helped keep my mind off of stressing!
post #46 of 171
I wonder how Queenie's appt went...

I had a pretty good day, got some nice bloody show and learned a lot from the massage therapist about where to press and such. Then I puttered around and now my downstairs is much less of a disaster area than it was and my poor neglected rats have a nice clean cage. I feel crampy as the mw said I would. James has flipped around into the "ideal" birth position. PLUS, I found out that my mom is coming on June 1st, not June 4th as I had thought. Only 1 week from now! Yay!

Dh started up Atkins again today, so we're going to use a coupon we have for a steakhouse. I feel hungry.

Kirsten, I hope you are feeling better.

Oh, and I hate games too, so glad dh got bored with them in college. We have some (male) friends who are absolutely certifiable about games, to the point of neglecting real life responsibilities. It sucks.

ETA: Congratulations, Queenie! You are one tough mama!
post #47 of 171
Thanks for the support, ladies! I appreciate it so much...

I've been a Tarot reader for the past 5 years, and I posted a quick note to an email list I belong to asking if anyone wanted to do a quickie reading for me about the upcoming birth. I immediately got back three sarcastic/nasty emails about how horrible the birth would be, how I'd want an epidural immediately, and how I had no business asking for a reading about something like that, because the cards wouldn't tell me anyway. ?!?! WTF? I sent a little message saying I was unsubscribing because I choose to surround myself with positive energy and affirmations, and that I would never respons in such a nasty way to anyone who ask me for a reading...

Why do people act like that?

On the gaming topic, I know lots of people who get honestly addicted to playing online games. Its really sad, and I don't really know what to suggest. It seems like most of the folks who get seriously obsessed do "snap out of it" at some point, and decide that REAL life (not on a computer) is a lot better. But, its really really hard on friends and family until they make that realization.
post #48 of 171
Wow Queenie, WTF indeed!! I hope this wasn't a group near to your heart, what nasty people! I have a set of cards but no experience reading them, or I'd do a reading for your myself! Have I ever told you that a friend did a reading for me just before I had Ben (really a reading for Ben) and the primary card she drew was the Queen of Cups?? I think of that all the time when I see your screen name Overnight labor vibes to you!!
post #49 of 171
QoC, I'm glad you declined the induction yesterday. Please do some reading about cytotec before you agree to it. I loaned out my copy of Ina May's newest book but if I remember correctly, there are some really disturbing things about cytotec. Like besides just making labor miserable. Doesn't someone else on here have a copy of that book? Julie was it you? If anybody has it, look up cytotec and let us know what it says. Anyway, best of luck in whatever you decide to do.

I'm actually NOT feeling AS miserable and ready for the baby to come out right now. I'm officially 38 weeks today and I keep finding things that need to be done. I want to wax my kitchen floor first. And I want to clean out my car (carob ALL over the backseat from a popsicle DH gave DD to eat back there...what WAS he thinking?) and install the baby seat. I also am working REALLY hard at keeping the house clean and doing at least one organizational thing per day. I'm so 'into' this mode that I do find it irritating to have to stop and do the fun kid stuff my DD expects. And of course my DH is sick of all my requests for little projects. But tough.

I am having to get up constantly at night to pee...up to six times some nights. Which sucks. Leaves me in a slump if I don't keep moving all day. And I'm usually in quite a bit of pain by nightfall with my tailbone/lower back. I keep freaking out when I wake up at night trying to figure out if I'm starting labor...it only takes a minute to realize I woke because I have to pee. I think second time around I'm just hyper aware of everything.

We're not gamers here but DH does spend way too much time at this chat room (again not THAT kind). He can surf for hours and I find it quite irritating. I usually cheat a couple minutes here and there from my work time to come here but he would literally come home and be on all evening if I didn't ride his a** about it.

Well, I've got to get back to work. Happy hump day.
post #50 of 171
Quote:
Originally Posted by irishgreengables
Rynna,

Could a litre of coke accidentally spill on his video game?
If it was that simple, we wouldn't be having this discussion beacuse I'd have done it years ago. Unfortunately, Mike's addiction is net-based. He has computer games that he used to play occasionally, but since our computer is temperamental and the soundcard driver doesn't work at all a lot of those are unplayable. I liked them a lot better, though, because he could hit pause at any time. You can't pause Gemstone. The game is always running, and if he just stood up at any time (God forbid he should even attempt it) his character might die. Then he gets all upset like the world has ended. I'm not allowed to have any activities that I can't stand up from right away, and he shouldn't either.

I told him last night to make his decision, Gemstone or me & Eli & NewBean. He said that wasn't a decision, but honestly he's said that before and I have a hard time believing it. Actions speak louder than words! I'm going to have my own vehicle probably around the 1st of June, so if he hasn't logged off of that evil by then, I'm packing up and moving back in with my mother. It's very simple for me; if I'm going to be a single parent, I may as well be a single parent who can get on the telephone whenever she needs to.

Quote:
Originally Posted by mattjulie
I told ds I was tired of him today. I guess I'd feel more guilty about it if I thought he understood, which I am sure he didn't since I didn't use a negative tone and he doesn't comprehend language very well, or if I wasn't so totally tired of him. Dh didn't care for it. Dh doesn't have a toddler accidentally pinching his painfully sensitive nipples all the time or climbing all over him or elbowing him in his immensely large tummy or leaning back on his belly so he can't breathe or throwing fits if he doesn't pick him up. He isn't the only one in the whole house that can possibly kiss an owie or cuddle at night or sit with when ds is grumpy. I am so tired of my son! Dh has been home for a week straight (he's laid off for 2 weeks) and I still do the brunt of the parenting, mostly b/c ds won't allow dh to do anything. I am frustrated, mostly b/c not only did I count on this as a reprieve, which it isn't that much, but also b/c it is painfully clear that I am going to have major issues mothering a mama magnet and a newborn.
I know *exactly* how you feel, except that Eli does understand when I tell him I'm frustrated with him. Then he climbs up on me and wraps his little arms around my neck and cries, which of course sets me off bawling. It's heartbreaking. Then Mike has the nerve to yell at me for yelling at Eli, and he turns around and does the same thing because (of course) Eli turns off the computer while he's playing that EVIL GAME!! (See, everything in this household revolves around that hideousness. )

I tasted the clearish-whitish whatever that's coming out of my nipples, and I too thought it was a bit strange, but not terribly salty.. more like unflavored. I didn't think it was all that great, but Eli says it's "mmmm yummy" and " 'liscious" so . It's definately not sweet like real milk, or super-creamy like early milk. It's really quite watery. Eli's happy with it, I think because he's still getting Mamma and it's more than was there before, but when the real milk comes back, I'm sure he'll want to nurse all the time. I'm kind of hoping he'll get chubby for a little while on real, fatty, newborn milk. I saw him on camera over the weekend and for the first time, I think I saw him the way others see him-- he really looked malnourished. Apparently, the camera only adds 10 pounds if you're an adult. They got me sitting on a beach, and I look like a beached whale. :LOL Anyway, I've heard that kids sometimes gain a lot of weight when the milk comes back in.. maybe for the first time in his life, Eli will have little chubby thighs, or arms that don't look like pencils, or maybe, just maybe, his ribs won't flare out over his belly anymore.
post #51 of 171
Quote:
Originally Posted by Queen of Cups
I've been a Tarot reader for the past 5 years, and I posted a quick note to an email list I belong to asking if anyone wanted to do a quickie reading for me about the upcoming birth. I immediately got back three sarcastic/nasty emails about how horrible the birth would be, how I'd want an epidural immediately, and how I had no business asking for a reading about something like that, because the cards wouldn't tell me anyway. ?!?! WTF? I sent a little message saying I was unsubscribing because I choose to surround myself with positive energy and affirmations, and that I would never respons in such a nasty way to anyone who ask me for a reading...
I used to read Tarot all the time, but that's one of those things that's really difficult to do with a toddler around. :LOL I actually did a few readings a couple of months ago, but before that it'd been years. I can't find my favorite deck (Hanson-Roberts, I think) but I found my first deck (mythic tarot) which is still a lot of fun. I can't understand why people would be nasty about that, though. It just doesn't make any sense to me.
post #52 of 171
Quote:
Originally Posted by mattjule
AITN also mentioned that our mothering hormones at the end of pregnancy/during the babymoon focus on the newborn to the extent that we start to feel less attached/more irritated with our older children. She is always careful to preface these comments with "everyone's experience is different and some may experience the opposite, but this is the general trend..." (paraphrased). I find this to be really helpful lately in finding patience for ds and it helps to know that it won't always be this way, that a little down the road it will even out again. So those of you who are also struggling with your current dc, hopefully that helps a little.
Wow, that is really interesting! I wonder if this is true for DH's too, I swear he has no patience these days and I find myself using my "stern mommy voice" to my DS constantly! My tolerance level for his behavior is really low! Although the other half of the time I find myself cuddling him close, thinking about how we only have a few more weeks of being alone together.

QoC: Congrats on refusing the induction and hanging on a little while longer. Your baby will be here soon and all this discomfort will be a distant memory! Jeez, I can't believe that about the tarot readers. I never really read tarot myself, although I have a couple cool decks, but I have lots of friends who do readings. I haven't had one in 4 years though because I got paranoid that a reading would tell me something I didn't want to know about my child(ren). It's weird, I know. Anyhow, I'm sorry you were treated so shabbily by that list...just a shame!!

Rynna: I'm really really sorry your DH is driving you so crazy. I've been about ready to pack up and take off a few times, I can really sympathize. I wish I could be there to help you vent.

to everyone feeling rotten! I'm going to see an osteopath tomorrow because my yoga teacher said he could help with the aches and pains (particularly the pubic symphasis), I'll let you know how it goes.

Tamara
post #53 of 171
Gosh, I hope you all don't hate me for saying this, but I still feel pretty good. I mean, I have my moments, that's for sure, but overall I think I'm pretty lucky. Well, either that or this baby is going to be late late late and I just haven't hit that stage yet.
I'm hoping for the former though, as I am totally excited and ready to meet this little wiggleworm.

As for the thing on the less patience with your kids, well, I don't have my own kids yet other than the in utero babe, but I have noticed less patience with the ones I take care of, as well as with my furkids!
Very interesting!

I have a mw appt tomorrow and since she's going to be out of town after that until early June, I think I'm going to have her go ahead and check me. I have my GBS test too and and hoping like crazy that I test neg.

Our co-sleeper and bathtub came in the mail, as did our crib mattress, so I think we're all set with what we need and even though the house is not as clean as I'd like, I still am ready for this baby to come! (Is feeling ready a sign that babe is nowhere near coming out?) :LOL
post #54 of 171
Quote:
Originally Posted by eilonwy
Anyway, I've heard that kids sometimes gain a lot of weight when the milk comes back in.. maybe for the first time in his life, Eli will have little chubby thighs, or arms that don't look like pencils, or maybe, just maybe, his ribs won't flare out over his belly anymore.
Rynna- My oldest always was and still is a string bean. She can still wear her size 2/3 skort from Old Navy that she has had for over 2 years. Anyway She didn't get all nice and chubby from the newborn milk after her sister was born. She stayed the same ol' string bean she always was! Dh & I joke that she will be our super model and pay for our retirement. She eats like a pig and still has no butt and no thighs. If only I could be that lucky!
post #55 of 171
So we got rid of our couch a few months ago-Tain had a horrible vomiting/diarrhea spell and it was pretty ripe-since then we have had my dh's recliner, my glider, and two butterfly type chairs. Our living room is small so we thought chairs would end up being better than a couch anyway. But I tell you, I REALLY want a couch! First of all, this baby takes up a lot more room than Tain did, I get short of breath a lot and find sitting upright uncomfortable. So I have taken to lying on the floor. More comfy for breathing, etc, but sucks when I have to get up. Also, I think about nursing and cuddling Tain at the same time, things I can't do in a chair. And then there's watching a movie with dh in the scarce moments we have time alone together and not being able to cuddle up to him. I really want a couch...
post #56 of 171
Last night I freaked my dh out! I told him after dinner that he was going to take the kids and the dogs outside and I was going to clean. Then I cleaned the entire main floor plus all 3 bathrooms. THen I got our oungest to sleep and while he was getting our oldest to sleep I went down stairs and cleaned the walls and molding and the appliances. He peeked around the stair case and asked if it was safe. I told him sure and as soon as he stepped foot in the kitchen I gave him a job! :LOL I think he figured he had a few more weeks before I turned into psycho cleaning lady but he was wrong!

QoC - I have Ina May's Guide To Child Birth if you want to know what she has to say on Cyotec let me know.
post #57 of 171
Julie, no problem, my dh is actually not a bad sewer and my mommy will be here soon. Just send along the fabric and let that task drop off your plate.

Re: Cyotec, I was just reading about it last night in Ina May's Guide and it has indeed killed some moms, just as Pit has. For a mom who has never been sectioned, I think Cytotec is still a reasonable choice when you get to the point of needing to make those choices. Ina May is really pissy about it bc it is being used so casually and the stats on complicatiosn are not being well documented. And she should be. But given the choice between a Cytotec tab in my vagina and an IV of Pit, I'd probably choose the Cytotec in hopes of avoiding the IV. Uterine rupture is the primary risk.

Still pregnant today! Dh tried the reflexology points the massage therapist showed me, and they do produce a nice contraction, but no baby, alas.
post #58 of 171
Is it possible to get a half dose of induction drugs? They must have a standard amount that they start with... and isn't it a needle into an IV? It seems to me you *should* be able to request as little as possible. Maybe I'm being overly idealistic... it's what I do at home with medications. For a while, I took 1/2 a multi vitamin, because the whole thing made me nauseous. I've taken 1/2 a Tylenol before, or 1/2 a Nytol (before I got pregnant with Roland)

Julie, I know what you mean about wanting a couch!! We threw ours out when we got fleas this spring (darn cat!) along with our carpet (there was hardwood underneath) We only have 1 chair (a rocker) and Ive been using a mattress on my livingroom floor. DS thinks it (& I) are a trampoline/jungle gym. We bought a new couch/loveseat over the weekend & THEY'RE COMING TODAY!!! It's going to be so nice to *not* get woken up by being headbutted in the stomach (I find myself dosing off alot these days)
post #59 of 171
IIRC, Cytotec is manufactured in a 300 mg tab that can be halved or quartered. Ina May thinks it should be quartered, natch. If I were doing a Cytotec induction, I'd ask for 1/4 tab, because you can always add more, but you can't take an excess out of your bloodstream.

Pit can be administered in literally any dosage, and dosing protocols vary WIDELY among doctors, hospitals and geographic regions.
post #60 of 171
Thread Starter 
Some hospitals allow patients to control their own drug dosages for pitocin and pain relief, and the patients give themselves a lot less medication in those situations. The hospital here says that when a mom comes in to get induced, they start her off at the maximum dose and they don't turn it off until the baby is born (or until the baby goes into severe distress and requires a c-sect.) Although I suppose a mom could pull out the IV line...

I think the Mothering archives have an article about Cytotec.
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