Long post about getting financially fit
Ladymadelon, DON'T give up!! I know things must feel pretty impossible right now, but you really can pull through the difficult financial times.For a couple of years I have been participating on a forum for simple living (www.simpleliving.net). Through that I have come across the most amazing stories of people who have been able to turn their lives around financially--not through any gimmics or get-rich-quick schemes, but by learning how to live frugally within their means. I highly recommend it--it is an incredibly diverse bunch of people, and they have amazing suggestions, opinions, and stories to share.
Aside from that, there are a couple of books available at most any public library that are great for getting started on making ends meet. The two that I recommend the most are totally non-judgmental. There's no artificial budget to set up, just a (long) process of improving your relationship with money:
Dominguez. Your Money or Your Life (this is the simple living Bible--it's pretty extreme in that it tries to get you to revolutionize your relationship to money, and it demands a lot of self-reflection and self-criticism on the part of the reader. It might be a tough first step for a newbie, but the more you get into frugality the better it gets. The best thing about it is it encourages you to face your fears about money and gives tons of suggestions for educating yourself on how to be financially fit)
Amy D. The Tightwadder Gazette (can never spell that woman's last name--this is a collection of newsletters she put out in the late 80s. It's a PHENOMENAL collections of suggestions for how to pinch pennies while raising a large family, plus it's filled with her sometimes humorous sometimes deeply philosophical reflections on money, family, society as a whole, and consumerism in particular--very inspirational!)
Smart Women Finish Rich (not as profound as the previous two, but an easy introduction about thinking about money in a smart way--whereas the other two are all about living according to your own personal values and following your calling in life with money merely as the tool to make it possible, this one leans a little more toward the idea that being rich is good, period, which I don't like. But it IS a useful little book).
I think the most important (and hardest!) thing of all is to face whatever financial reality you're facing head-on, then educate, educate, educate yourself about how to deal with the problem. Breaking the whole horrible "ack, we're drowning!!!" dilemma into smaller components that you can identify and deal with will help too. Like if you're getting behind in utilities bills, I know it's possible to come up with an agreement with each service provider to keep paying a smaller amount per month. As long as they know you're making a good faith effort, they won't cut you off. If debt is a problem too, there are really practical, basic steps you can start taking to deal with that too. And as for the car problem--maybe your husband would be able to barter his skills during the time he is out of work in exchange for services from someone who knows cars--maybe trading work would help him get through the rough patch of unemployment too--it always helps to be doing SOMETHING!
Sorry to go on at such length
-- your post just really called out to me, and I am convinced that you and your family can pull through, since I've heard the stories of so many others who have. Best wishes to you!
it drives me insane how much tp he thinks is necessary, i mean it *seriously* upsets me 
) and went to go find another. in the meantime, dd went back into the bedroom and peed all over some of her favorite books 
i was so upset when i found out. my patience is so much thinner than it used to be and that made me feel even worse. i was trying to get her to understand that the books were now ruined. i guess that's the part that really bothered me. they were her favorites and we used to read them everynight. i suck at letting go of stuff too, so i'm still desperately seeking ways to salvage them since i think i was able to wipe them dry pretty quickly and the ones with paper pages only got hit on the cover. i feel like such a mean mama lately and when you put that together with the no energy factor it just gets worse. please somebody tell me that this will pass soon and i'll be back to my patient happy self soon..... 
Every morning is touchy--if I don't wake up to eat a few pretzels in the early morning hours, I can expect difficulty keeping my breakfast down, and I often feel yucky until noon--but the really nasty persistent nausea starts Sunday night, peaks Monday morning and is bad all day (this is also when I'm most tired; I slept almost twice as many hours as I was awake the past 2 Mondays), and subsides Tuesday afternoon. Only in the first week of nausea did I throw up anytime between Wed. noon and Sun. noon. 
: It's not because my schedule is different on the weekends--my bosses are letting me work flexible hours 
and I've decided church is optional, so I'm not pushing myself to get up early on any day. It's good to have a somewhat predictable pattern, anyway!
Thanks and sympathy 
to those who remind me that it could be a lot worse!
!
Going to plant stuff and clean my house...really exciting I know.
The past few days I have been exhausted again - and short on patience. No fun. Getting outside, getting some exercise and trying to be productive seem to help, but...
