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What would you say if your MIL did this?  

post #1 of 9
Thread Starter 
So we had a family reunion picnic this weekend, and since I just recently became able to show off my little pooch of belly, I wanted to wear something that emphasized my growing tummy. (Not many of them had seen me since I found out I was pg.)

I wore a spaghetti-strap tank top (with a built-in shelf bra) and one of DH's buton-down shirts on top with khaki pants (elastic waist). Well, seeing that I am making another person, my metabolism was through the roof, and I started sweating if I even thought about wearing the button-down, so I tied it around my waist.

All of the women were in the kitchen area getting the food ready--there was probably about ten-fifteen of us (it's a LARGE family ). MIL was sitting across the room from me, and at a pause in conversation, she yells out, "Lynn, are you wearing a bra??" You could have heard a pin drop in the silence that ensued. I replied, "No. Is that okay with you?" (imagine me saying it sarcastically). She immediately became embarrassed, covered her face with her hands, started laughing, and shook her head "No."

My SIL spoke up in my defense, and said, "There's a bra built-in to it, Mom." Then leaned over and whispered to me, "Remind me not to pack any of those kind of shirts when we go to visit them this summer!"

Let me say that MIL is a little bit CRAZY--all her kids agree--and no one EVER contradicts her. At least until I came along. She told my DH (who was sworn to secrecy ) that I think I know everything. :

I really do have a good relationship with all of DH's family--I don't consider myself an "IL"--but sometimes MIL drives me CRAZY! Luckily, everyone who heard the conversation thought she was completely out of line. So...what do you think?
post #2 of 9
I think I'd go topless next time I went over. :
post #3 of 9
Do you think a bra will be mandatory when breastfeeding? Maybe you could get some of those Fredricks ones with cut out nipple-holes?
post #4 of 9
Quote:
Originally Posted by AnnMarie
I think I'd go topless next time I went over. :

I second that : :
post #5 of 9
You did a beautiful job handling that one!! Cheers to you. And to your SIL for speaking out for you too. Yes, I think it was a crass thing to say but IMHO if thats the worst of it. . . Be thankful!! I get it from my MIL and my SIL all the time. "Why would you dress her (my dd) like that? (They didn't like the way a shirt and shorts matched.) One SIL told a mutual friend that I was HUGE with my last pregnancy. When the friend saw me the first the she said was "You are NOT huge." I looked at her strange and she told me what my SIL said. At the time the MW was concerned I was measuring small. Its not terrible but it is constant.

Sorry this has turned into a rant, oops.
post #6 of 9
Thread Starter 
Apricot -

Funny you say that... DH said to me in the car on the way over, "You're not wearing a bra." I said, "I know." DH said, "Well, what if they can see your nipples?" I said, "Well, I hope everyone knows I have nipples, because I plan on breastfeeding!" :
post #7 of 9
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kabes
You did a beautiful job handling that one!! Cheers to you. And to your SIL for speaking out for you too. Yes, I think it was a crass thing to say but IMHO if thats the worst of it. . . Be thankful!! I get it from my MIL and my SIL all the time. "Why would you dress her (my dd) like that? (They didn't like the way a shirt and shorts matched.) One SIL told a mutual friend that I was HUGE with my last pregnancy. When the friend saw me the first the she said was "You are NOT huge." I looked at her strange and she told me what my SIL said. At the time the MW was concerned I was measuring small. Its not terrible but it is constant.

Sorry this has turned into a rant, oops.
Thank you! I am very thankful for my great IL family. I live many miles from my family, so I am so grateful that they are close by. I love them like my own family (yes, even my goofy MIL ) I know many other people have it much worse! MIL can just be so funny sometimes, and this was one of them!
post #8 of 9
LOL, what a crazy MIL. I honestly don't get the 'you must wear a bra thing'. I once was chatting with a good friend and it came up that I don't wear a bra, she was totally shocked. I'm a perky B/C cup, why would I wear a bra?? Weird.


I like the way you handled it
post #9 of 9
I wish I could get by without wearing a bra! I'm glad your SIL backed you up. LOL about all the other suggestions here.

On a related note:
After a family dinner last night my grandmother mentioned that my cousin had gained 40 pounds in her pregnancy (she's due next week). She then said that she hoped I wouldn't gain that much, and she was only allowed to gain 20 pounds when she was pregnant. I'm pretty sure we had this conversation when I was pg the first time. I tried to explain that they now recommend 25-35 pounds, but it really varies by person, etc. Her reply, to the new recommendation, was, "is that a good thing."

I guess she just doesn't believe that medicine has changed in the almost 60 years since she was last pregnant. She was also offended that my SIL's hospital room was TOO BIG- since she'd been in a room with 3 other mothers. Let's not even think about extended breastfeeding. Oh, family!
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