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June 6 - June 12 Thread - Page 2

post #21 of 46
Thread Starter 
That is so great that so many of you can keep it quiet for so long! I had intended to, but I was only able to do so for like 2 days. I told my family right away and now everyone at work knows too... It's just too exciting to keep under wraps!
post #22 of 46
I didn't want anyone to know, because I was so shocked. BUT.... impossible to keep something so BIG (and yet so tiny) a secret. It was amazing to me how fast the news travelled.

I am so happy to report that I have had 3 non-morning sickness days. I don't feel great, but I'm not fighting off nausea every minute like i was last week. I am sooo relieved and feel like an "normal" person again.

Now my major paranoia is that my 7 year old is sick and yesterday had a fever of almost 104! ack! Viruses in early pregnancy are BAD, and yet I can't NOT be there for him! So I'm washing my hands repeatedly and taking lots of Vit C.... wish me luck!
post #23 of 46
Hey everyone! I'm doing okay - only get sick if I don't eat the second that I get hungry. Much better than the previous 2 times. I was thinking that I could only manage another hosp. birth(can't afford a homebirth and didn't want to drive too far) and I should just deal, but after doing some talking w/different people including tofumama, I have decided to check out the birthing center near me (okay to say it's near me wouldn't be quite right I think in perfect driving conditions it will take at least 45 minutes). We are going to thier open house next tuesday night. DH isn't all that supportive so if I like it I'll really have to work on him.
post #24 of 46
Thread Starter 
Kerry- A birthing center is a great compromise for DHs who want hospital births and mom's that want home births. They are usually located close to a hospital and have a well thought out plan to get you there if need be.

I would love to birth in a birthing center, but believe it or not, there are NONE in Santa Fe. I have thought about using a midwife in a hospital, but I am a little scared because there were some complications with my first delivery that resulted in a c-section from some staff doctor that I never met.... So, I think if I do do a VBAC, I will use an OB who understands my values and goals. I am also going to try to find a doula who can be advocate in the hospital.....
post #25 of 46
Is anyone considering a homebirth?? Has anyone had a homebirth before and how were your experiences?? I am planning a homebirth. I had my first "official" prenatal appointment today. It went well. Its exciting!!!!!!!! I am also considering renting a birthing tub - not for the actual delivery but for the labor. The cool thing about this town is there is a birth center AND a small hospital both within 2 miles of my home which offer birth classes for free - even if you are not delivering there. I was amazed by that!!!!!!! I have also really been interested in hypnobirthing which tofumamma has mentioned.
post #26 of 46
I have my babies at home and am also a new midwife (though I honestly don't know how I'm gonna work that now.... can you tell this one wasn't planned?!?).

I think it's great that you're going for a homebirth with your first baby! We help lots of first time mamas and it's very rewarding for them (and us) to see those babies come out where they were conceived!

Good luck!
post #27 of 46
My daughter was born at home I can't speak highly enough about the experience, and we hope to have another home birth this time around. Bunches, it's great that you are looking into this ~ don't let anyone discourage you because this is your "first"!
post #28 of 46
OOOoooohhhhh. Now I'm gonna whine. I really want one, but that would mean spending our house savings. But this pg has been rough enough so far, that I think it'll be the last one. I want a homebirth soo bad! But a hosp. birth is free, and our hosp isn't that bad. :-(
post #29 of 46
Thanks for the encouragement!!! Oh yes, I've already gotten lots of opionions thrown my way. Not only is this my first baby but I'm 37!!!! I am a nurse in the ER so I must admit most of the staff think I'm crazy but they also know my midwife and respect her. She used to work on our OB unit as an L&D nurse for 10 years so they LOVE her! She has done close to 500 births!!!!!!
I've also worked in the Neonatal Intensive Care unit and seen how SMALL the actual percentage of births gone wrong are - most of the babies in there were premies or had congenital defects. Or we had to monitor babies for a few hours due to medications given in birth. My midwife also always attends births with another CNM, ANP so that is reassuring. There are lots of reasons to do it!! Even financially! It costs about 1/3 the cost of the hospital and the cost includes 6 weeks postpartum and newborn care including as many visits as I want. I am excited!! And, dh thinks it totally makes sense. I don't even have to convince him which is great. It doesn't mean I'm not a little nervous but I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. For now, I'm trying to get through morning sickness. LOL........
post #30 of 46
I am a huge proponent of homebirth...I had both of my kids at home and will do so again. It is hard to decide what to chose when insurance will pay for hospital but not for a midwife's services. I know what I would do, but i can only make the "right" choice for me and don't judge others. I know I would be any hospital's worst nightmare if I were ever to need to transfer while in labor!

My stress right now is about DH. We didn't plan this pregnancy and he really didn't want to have a third child. He is not "unhappy" but he is not being very supportive either. He seems cranky if I mention that I am tired or don't want to cook because food is a little yucky to me. He knows that I usually get pretty intense pregnancy sickness and that I am not doing too badly right now, but it is like he has no patience for me to be any kind of burden on his cozy little lifestyle. This is starting to make me resentful and passive aggressive feeling. Its not a great way to start things. He says, "Give a me some more time. Its going to take me a while to get into this whole thing," which I guess is fair enough, but I cannot make my pregnancy wait for him to "catch up" emotionally, ya know?

Enough of my ranting? Any other husband gripes?

post #31 of 46
I am not going to go into everything here, but I am SO not a happy camper. I had my first appt with my mw today. Now, I love my mw, she advocated for me big time when my dd was born. Turns out, she is no longer at the hosp. she was at. This is ok, as the hosp. was not that progressive, and we had to fight alot about everything. I got my way for the most part, but it was alot of work. She is now at a hosp. that is close to an hour away, and this hosp. is more backward than the first! She said not to worry, she gets what she wants, but this birth was going to be my 'healing birth' and I don't WANT to fight for everything! Plus, I have to have an u/s tomorow, b/c my cycles are long, and she wants to be sure about my dates. I told her I *know* the exact day I ovulated, yet in I go tomorow...my mw is a little more medical than I'd like, but I do like her alot. So now I am torn. I do not want to go to this hospital. There is a Birth Center in a hosp. closer, but you have to see all 4 midwives, and when you deliver, you get whoever is on call. I am so upset, if it wasn't so hot, i'd be crying.
post #32 of 46
Mar- sorry to hear that he isn't into it yet hopefully he'll come around soon. Mine worries all the time mainly about money and if we'll be alright, blah blah same old with him Mr. Worry wart

Tofumama- well I hope you get your way at that hospital. Dealing w/the heat ok? blah I did squat all day. Our a/c is in the basement so it's getting put in soon. I hear it's suppose to be back to "normal" Not looking forward to those future hazy hot humid days to come.
post #33 of 46
I hate to butt in, but if you're already battling over things with your mw now (so early), what's going to happen later? IMO a mw should trust your judgement-- insisting on an u/s for dates when you're sure of when you ovulated is not a sign that she trusts that you know what's going on with your body.
Do you have any other options?

Oh, and Pam_and_Abigail.... it's terrible to not get the birth of your choice because of money.... many many mw are flexible about payments and stuff.... every pregnant woman here gets health insurance from the state (which does not cover HB) and so many women chose hospital births because they are "free".... I would never try to talk someone into a HB, but it sounds like it's important to you--- follow your dreams!

Feeling quite opionated today!
post #34 of 46
I agree about the birth choice/money issue! Homebirths are certainly cheaper than hospital births, so for healthy women with healthy pregnancies you'd think they would cover them just to save money. This is part of the reason we decided to stay here in Switzerland until all our kids are born. I love my midwife and our insurance covers everything. I'm afraid to give birth in the US...I know that sounds ridiculous.

I had my 2nd at home and it worked out really well. I'm the kind of person who needs to be alone during labor, and I cannot deal with it or progress with any distractions, even my husband. Last time I labored alone in our bathtub and woke up my husband up when I felt like I was in transition and he called the midwife. I hope all goes this well the 3rd time around!

My OB is doing my prenatal care until 12 weeks, and then my midwife will take over. I love my OB too. He is friends with my midwife and totally fine with my choices. I had an ultrasound at his office last week and saw the heartbeat!

In the US do they do routine ultrasounds at 12 weeks to measure the nuchal fold? It's routine over here, and I'd rather be informed and prepared if there is a potential problem, so I'm going ahead with it. Anyone else know anything about this?
post #35 of 46
Malama, you are absolutely right. I went to my u/s appt. today, and was 7wks (which is exactly what *I* had figured, grrr...) but I have an appt to meet a new group of mw next week. I called the hospital I had my son at (I LOVED this hospital, btw, very progressive. They call their LDR floor the Birth Center) and talked to one of the nurses for like 15 mins, told her my story, and she knew the mw I had when I delivered there! (who is now in MD : ) So she told me I would love these midwives, and gave me their #. I have a consultation to 'interview' sort of, to see if I like them, and they will be open to what I want. If this doesn't work out, I don't know what I will do...
Other than that, I feel pretty good, REALLY tired, but I have insomnia! Time to get out the Hypnobirthing tapes!

PS, Kerri, if you still are interested in Leominster, the midwives are at Montachusett Women's Health Center, which is in Leominster Hospital. I'll let you know how it goes. Hey, if you go there, maybe we could be roomates! Ha! ( actually, you get a private room, but it would be funny if we went in at the same time!)
post #36 of 46
Originally Posted by tofumama
I am curious, and if I am being too forward I apologize, but isn't it early to get an u/s? I noticed alot of people getting them already, and I was never able to get one before 18wks.
My doctor doesn't normally do an u/s until 20 weeks, but because my progesterone levels were so low (I'm taking supplements now) he wants to check and make sure everything is ok.
post #37 of 46
It's so weird to me this time. W/my first 2 I never even considered a birth center or a midwife or a homebirth. This time I am so into the birth center idea - would really like to have a homebirth but just can't afford it (it would be aobut $2500 for the midwife that I would want to use).

Tofumama - is Leominster where you are thinking of going? Doesn't it suck that there isn't a birth center closer to us? Have you considered Wellesley?

Here is a link to the birthcenter . Isn't it beautiful? I'm going to the open house this coming week and I can't wait!
post #38 of 46
I am glad you are discussing home vs hospital vs birth center births. I *think* I want a homebirth for this baby. Our first was born at a hospital with a traditional OB. I had a birth plan, discussed my wishes and did Bradley. I ended up with an epidural after reaching 9cm and not progressing after 6 hours(actually back sliding to 7cm). It was a good experience for the most part, but I want something different. I wonder if the circumstances were different would I have had the epidural.

Soooo, our insurance doesn't cover the local/only Birth Center. I keep contemplating a homebirth, but as someone mentioned the hospital is free. I no longer work, and finances are a bit tight although we are basically debt free. DH's insurance changes in October, so perhaps they will then cover the birth center. I also have a letter drafted to obtain special payment for the birth center/midwife. Ugh - what to do...
post #39 of 46
I am leaning towards Leominster, b/c I had such a great experience there with my son. Its all depending on whether or not I mesh with the midwives they have...I thought about Wellesly, but its at least an hour, and to have to go to all my appts. there, with 2 little ones, and then get there for the birth...all that driving doesn't do it for me. I think Leominster is the next best thing for me, plus I know they will respect my wishes/birth plan.
post #40 of 46
DH and I had pretty much decided to keep our house savings for just that, but reading here brings back the nagging feeling about birthing at home. I have a friend who is a massage therapist, and she owns her own business. She recently invited a mw to share her office space, and she had been recommedning this woman to me before (she had a hb with her last and said she could help find me a good mw). My friend is also doing the doula class this weekend, and she has offered me free doula services, as well as massage during labour. But I still don't know... Our hosptial is really pretty good, and the doc I have this time seems pretty decent. The only things I see being a problem are: I want to cut the cord after it stops pulsing, and I am starting to look into not having the vit K and eyedrops. I have my second appt with my ob next week, so I think I'll ask her about these things. If they aren't willing to be flexible, I'll be even more keen on hb. Also, I want to do hypnobirthing again, and I am certain I could relax better in my bedroom than at the hosp.
Last night I dreamt about labour, and it was pretty vague, but I ended up at a different hospital (not the maternity one), and all I recall is that I didn't get to hold my baby until sometime well after the birth. Dh brought her to see me, and I had my back turned, and he was describing her to me, and I felt so disconnected, I didn't even care to turn around at first. It had been hours or days, and I could remember nothing at all about even being in labour.
The bright side is we are considering moving to a cheaper apartment, and if we do that, it may be much easier to save the money for a hb. However, I d love this place, and I have a lot of friends nearby, who I hoped to have at the hb. I don't know what's going to happen. I'm just rambling now.
And hey, a part of me is a teensy but afraid of having a hb! And I'll kick myself if I land in the hosp. anyway for an induction, as I had to have one last time when my water broke, but I had no contrax.
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