Week of June 7 - Page 3

[mirthfulmum]

24w 2d

Katie. Let me just say that I know EXACTLY what you are going through (over the weekend I got into a huge fight with my mom where at one point she told me she never wanted to see me again and then later in the argument she told me to f*@#k off in front of Alias. I've chosen to forgive her and try to heal the relationship). I agree with everyone else here. Your mother needs to be respectful and supportive of you and your family and, like my mother, isn't able to create that for you. I have never met you but from reading your posts about Lucy I can tell that you are a fantastic mother. The stories you tell about your little girl amaze me. Your child is brilliant and obviously very happy. You are doing a wonderful job and have a right to make whatever choices you want when it comes to the well being of your family.

I have to keep this post short. Alias has pretty much been standing at my feet chanting "come on mommy, no more 'puter." since I started writing.

[kraftykathy]

Lucysmama - I'm so sorry you have to go through this right now. I agree that your mother is the selfish one. She is way more concerned with how this will affect her, not about you and the baby. If she tries to bring it up again, maybe you could tell her that you've already made up your mind and don't wish to talk about it since it is a topic that leads to yelling and tears and upset. That was definately uncool of your mom to react that way!

Wow I love hearing about everyone who is finding out about whether they are having girls or boy and even twins, it really makes me sort of wish I was having an ultrasound this time. I really just want to trust in nature to take it's course, but it's so hard to be patient, lol!

I don't think I'm carrying twins but I also feel so HUGE right now and have had a few comments on it, enough to make me feel a bit embarrased and started me thinking that maybe I'm too big?! At the same time I know how flitters feels because I felt like that during my first pregnancy, like I couldn't grow big fast enough and I really wanted it to show! Isn't it weird how feelings can change back and forth like that even within the same pregnancy?

Noah is such an awesome name! I love it!

I haven't posted for a couple of weeks though I've been checking in every few days. Been busy and haven't had too much computer time, but I have the day off today so here I am!

Last week's QOTW - I'm not doing any official exercise right now but I do have a physical job and am on my feet much of the day so I don't feel too guilty about it. Also I know that I haven't gained very much weight, no more than 10 pounds, and I feel really great right now, lots of energy, so I'm not too worried about exercise at the moment. We usually do short hikes (2-5km) almost every weekend in the summer and go splash around in the lake once a week as well, so I get some exercise outside of work by doing that. I would love to take a yoga class right now, but I don't think I will be able to afford it. I could plan out my own yoga work out I suppose, but it is way more fun in a class.

This week's QOTW - I don't think I will be having a baby shower either unless my spinning group has a little one for me. They do stuff like that once in a while and when they do, the gifts are wonderful! Small handmade things, lots of knitted clothing and stuff. I sort of hope they have one for me though I also feel uncomfortable with being the center of attention. Boy we have a lot of shy mom's here! At least I'm not alone with that.

I bought an Old Navy bathing suit - a two piece tankini style. Some one else here pointed out the lack of booby support, luckily I'm one of those less endowed people so it's fine for me. Unfortunately my butt isn't tiny like my top so I always hate shopping for bathing suits in general. I guess that's what sarongs are made for though, eh, lol? Butt coverage!

My husband also hasn't gotten a chance to feel this baby move either. I can tell that the baby is feet down and facing my back because all of the kicks are straight down to the bladder or further back and therefore impossible to feel externally. A couple of times the baby has flipped over or something and I've seen those kicks, but then they're back to being straight down again, lol! Also this baby is defiantely NOT as active as my last which is fine cause he's a little hyperactive funny monkey, lol! Might be a change to have a calmer kiddo, hee-hee!

Talk more later,

Kathy

[AnnR33]

OK...who was it?? :LOL I didn't even notice my "title" until Tuesday and I hadn't even checked in here yet but I know it was one of you!
It's only been a week but I've only told my best friend and that's it! My mom is mad at me but too bad, I don't have control over anything in this crazy moving frenzy so I have to have one little thing I can have a handle on ya know??

My Dh is gone again this week and the house has been shown a lot but no offers yet, but it's only been listed a week so I know I can expect miracles! Spending a lot of time out and about so the house stays cleanLOL but it's tiring me out!

I needed NO diapers but since my SIL wanted to get started I've gotten sucked in again-just ordered 2 Baby Softwraps AIOs last weekend and some small covers from the TP-my paypal is empty so I can only trade now LOL It's so fun to get fluffy mail though I can't stop myself...he he

Take care
Ann

[Lucysmama]

Thank you all for your well-wishes. They mean a lot to me. I can't talk a lot now, Lucy is eating lunch, and when she is finished we are going to "wizzit" Daddy (visit) at work.

But thanks for saying I am not being nutty and selfish. The thing is, she maintained that it is my prerogative to do this, but she just "wants me to know" how upset she is. WTF?!?!? To me, that's just plain rude. I would never tell a pregnant woman that, and I'm sure nobody else would tell me that but her.

Anyway. We plan to cut off contact from her for a while, which is what we do when she gets nutso on us. (She calls it "her punishment" But really, we just wanna stay away from the stress.)

BTW, her mother treats her in the same way. I am curious to know how far back in generations this pattern of mother-daughter abuse goes. Both women (mom and Grandma) are respectful of their sons, and are verbally abusive to their daughters. Weird. I strive to break the cycle.

Sorry for hijacking the thread!

Love to you all ---- :Love

[ameliabedelia]

From what I've read, identical twins are completely a fluke and it makes zero difference if they run in either family. You're right, fraternal twins have to run in the mother's family because the mother has to have the genes that give her the propensity to release two eggs. The only other thing that is apparently being concluded these days is that with women having babies in their thirties and older, releasing two eggs is kind of like nature's built-in backup system for insuring that at least one egg is good and makes it to full term. Then, of course, are the increased chances of having twins (or more!) with all of the assistive reproductive technology that's available.

Phew! That makes me feel better. I am only 26, so not in my 30's yet, and it is fraternal twins which run in DH's family. His mom has a twin brother and he has two fraternal twin aunts. His mom also concieved twins, but they miscarried. It doesn't run in my family at all. So, I really don't think it is twins, but now I am wondering, but I still doubt it.

gmvh: being the geek that I am, I love the "twin science" stuff...it makes total sense, too...but then don't you think there could be a genetic predisposition to eggs splitting? I mean, it's mitosis gone wrong in a sense, isn't it? And since the cellular machinery comes from the female's egg...couldn't identicals run in the family? (i have no idea, just thinking out loud, here).

I am a science geek too. I have a friend who has had two sets of identical twins (only one set survived pregnancy), but she says that once you have twins (identical or fraternal) your chance of having them again increases. She did say that there is a something which can predispose someone to identical twins as well.

Flitters, I was super small with DD. I barely looked pregnant, even at 7 months. I know how you feel. I think it is pretty common to be really small with your first. With this one, I am bigger (still not huge), but bigger than I was at the same time with DD.

I am sorry about all of you having problems with your moms s

[water]

Anyway. We plan to cut off contact from her for a while, which is what we do when she gets nutso on us. (She calls it "her punishment" But really, we just wanna stay away from the stress.)

Katie - I too have cut off all contact with my mother for this pregnancy. she is also abusive and manipulative and came to visit in March, during which time she fought with me so bad that I was hysterical and freaking out for days afterwards. NOT worth it!!!! The last time I was pregnant she tried to commit suicide, how's that for wanting all the attention? (long, loooooong story precedes this, I'm not just being randomly callous).

Anyway I told her that I need to be around people who love me and support me with positive attention during this pregnancy, and she is not one of them.
So I'll call her when the baby is born, but for now it's such a relief to not have to talk to her!!!

So I know how you feel, stay strong, you need to do what's right for you and keep yourself happy and healthy!!!

Jenn

[Lucysmama]

at Ann's DDDDC!

[krnflwr]

Originally Posted by kraftykathy

Also this baby is defiantely NOT as active as my last which is fine cause he's a little hyperactive funny monkey, lol! Might be a change to have a calmer kiddo, hee-hee!

I'm so with you there, Kathy. I don't know how I'd manage two spirited, high-needs kids...makes me tired just thinking about it (but everything makes me tired lately ). Here's hoping for #2 to be a mellow, placid baby.

[mirthfulmum]

:LOL Love Ann's DDDC. Wish I could take credit for it.

A few times it has been mentioned that we are getting close to the third trimester. But I can't remember when the third trimester "officially" begins. Can someone remind me at what week it is that we enter the home stretch?

[OakEmber]

21 weeks

Krnflwr- Congrats on your girl! :girlpin

Lucysma- Sorry to hear about your fight with your Mom! It's good that you have the strenght to stay away from her a little while, mine lives a block away and that seems like an impossible feat for me (much to my DH disliking at times). We could definately start a whole new thread about breaking the cycle you mentioned and fear of turning into our mothers.

My we seem to have quite the clever jokester : among us! I wonder if other EC have as much fun as we do!

Mirthfulmum- I always figured that the third trimester started about 27 weeks but thought I'd look it up for you...Having a Baby, Naturally classifies it as months 7,8,9 (but doesn't say weeks). The Pregnancy Book (sears) says 7 months is week 26-29 so I'd say that we can celebrate even earlier than I thought The month thing always confuses me, but it looks like I am now in my 6th month, wow!

[OakEmber]

Mommadance- I wanted to comment on your dreams...I haven't had any prophetic dreams at all with this pregnancy and it honestly worries me a little that I won't have the same connection with my ds as I do with my dd. I know that it is a common worry when expecting your second anyway. With my Dd, I had a few of the prophetic type dreams...the first one I was before I actually had confirmed my pregnancy and in it a little girl about 3 or 4 appeared to me and I said to her "oh, you're finally here now" like I had been with her in a past life and was waiting for her or something. In another I was riding up an escalator and when I got to the top a wise woman type said to me "you are carrying a girl". Another yet I had a discussion with my little girl as to what her name would be, and yes she did choose Ember in it. (but I didn't know I was having a girl :LOL need to work on the trusting my intuition a bit it seems )

This time I really haven't had any baby dreams, and none that felt like the others. I actually had one of the weird pregnancy dreams that people mention having where I found a kitten and had to nurse it :LOL I had a dream while TTC about having a son, and being surprised by his looks as he didn't really look at all like dd...I wonder if that will be the case.

[True Blue]

20 weeks

Only got a sec, but the third trimester starts when you hit the 27 week mark....13 full weeks per trimester, making the day you hit 13 weeks the start of the second (because all of weeks 1-13 are included). It's when you have completed a 13 week section that a new trimester starts...make sense?

[AnnR33]

So no one is going to fess up We'll sniff you out eventually...LOL Thanks though, it gave me a good chuckle and it makes people ask me what my secret is!

Dreams...can't tell you what mine was because then that would give away my "secret" but I was having dreams even before I conceived of what this baby was going to be. Then had them even more right after I found out and they were right
I had them with my first too and was right but I was more unsure about my DD-thought she was a boy then a girl but was still surprised when she was a girl...I guess 2 out of 3 makes me slightly intuitive? LOL

Off to finally take a shower-it's ONLY 10am-yikes!
Ann

[Lucysmama]

Originally Posted by AnnR33

So no one is going to fess up?

[Piglet68]

21 weeks, 3 days

LOL...nice one, Lucysmama!

I was just about to post that it wasn't me!

I wish I had such dreams, but there isn't a prophetic or psychic bone in my body. I'm one of those plain ol' mortals, lol.


So 27 weeks then, huh? Well, I have a ways to go, but I must say this pregnancy is just WHIZZING by...

Ann: I scored some baby soft wraps AIO's too, I'm almost done buying diapers (what? don't say that!!)...whatever will I do? :LOL

[bluehalo]

Katie, I'm so sorry you're having such a hard time with your mom. Family stuff can be so stinking complicated I don't think you're being rude and selfish at all, and I find it perfectly understandable for you to want to distance yourself from her drama and stress. If she brings up the "punishment", you could always mention that it's more of a *consequence* than a punishment. Don't know if that would give her any clarity or not though...

Bathing suits -- I just bought a Gap tankini from Ebay ... it's cute and is more flattering than I anticipated. It's pretty basic, black, nothing too exciting ... but I think I'll be able to wear it in public without feeling like a total whale :LOL

Baby dreams / gender ... I had one gender dream about this baby, and in it it was a boy. DH had what he describes as a very vivid dream early in my pregnancy and said it was a girl. The US seemed like it was pretty clear that it was a boy, but then again, you never do know

I'm done buying diapers too ... it's kind of a bummer. I had to start stalking nursing clothing on ebay to try to distract myself from buying diapers, but then I remember how much I dislike most commercial nursing clothes. I have found a few of those camisole type tank tops that have a shelf-bra built in, and they've started making them in a nursing style too. I was really psyched to find those b/c I'll be able to wear most of my "regular" clothes, but still keep my belly covered when I pull up my shirt nurse, and not have to bother w/ nursing bras, etc. etc. Here's a link to what I'm talking about in case I'm making no sense : http://www.glamourmom.com ... they also sell them at Target for much cheaper!!

[OakEmber]

Sigh...don't you wish that you could have a group of woman like this to get together with IRL?? I just got back from Mom and Tots and instead of having enjoyed myself, I left with a heavy feeling. They were talking about nursing, and one had until 10 months, another til 14 months (not to shabby or anything) but I felt so alienated knowing that I'd literally doubled and tripled them, yet I didn't feel I could contribute much to the conversation...not that I didn't feel I had anything to say...just that it wouldn't be recepted,yah know?! Anyway, that's my gripe for the day...it's gloomy and rainy, must have something to do with it... I am looking forward to Bf Oakley, on demand, where ever I happen to be for as long as he wants

I just re-read this and was worried that it might come across in the wrong way...I am not trying to sound like a martyr for EN or anthing, I hope that it doens't come across that way to you guys...Someone will understand my sadness right? It's just that these group of woman, while they do value bf as a method of food...they fail to see beyond that and value the whole nursing relationship as a source of comfort, etc....that's what saddens me, just that there is such a long way to go still in the fight for BF.

[flitters]

19 weeks 5 days

yeah, it would be great to be near eachother IRL too, but i'm very thankful to have found you all here!

lucysmama, i'm so sorry your mother is making such a stressful situation out of your very reasonable (and completely unselfish) post-birth plans. I think it is wonderful that you are putting the needs of your growing family first.

bluehalo, THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU for the link to the glamourmom camisol tops!!! that is exactly what i was hoping to find! the office is chilly and i prefer the support of a shelf bra to other kinds so i wear camisol tops all the time and was not excited about the nursing bras i had seen so far. i'll check at target too. (i actually had plans to go bra shopping today since i think i've outgrown mine finally!)

well, my dreams are not particularly prophetic either. actually, i dream about food literally every night. i make sure i'm not hungry when i go to bed, but that doesn't seem to matter. i don't seem to wake up in the middle of the night hungry (i just have to pee) but by morning i'm ready for breakfast. i did have one dream of a little girl, about 2 or 3 years old that looked like a combination of me and dh, but for some reason i still have boy feelings about the baby inside. i don't know, maybe it was our daughter and it'll just take me a while to realize it. we'll see!

also, thanks for the support about my silly feelings about not looking particularly pregnant yet. i'm sure once i'm all big (which i'm very excited about!) i'll probably wish i were smaller again. i am just surprised at how long it's taking to really stick out. dh is the best though, he's so sweet telling me i have the nicest belly! and we happened to hear the heart once more with the fetoscope which was cool too!

oh, for some reason i was thinking (for no reason in particularly) that october 27 was the day i'd go into labor. i decided to go look at the lunar calendar and i saw that we conceived on the full moon in february and the 27th is a full moon too. (and the 28th is a full lunar eclipse!) i just thought that was neat.

ok, back to work!

[Piglet68]

embersmom...i know what you mean. i will say though, that i'm glad and proud to hear they are nursing for so long. i've always told people here that it's not uncommon at all back home (BC). here in cleveland, its rare to see little ones being BF'd, let alone older kids. they'd probably have a heart attack if they saw me nursing my 2 year old, lol.

[AnnR33]

Ah ha!!! Just as I suspected :LOL


Do those of you that used nursing tops before really like them and think they need them? I never used them with my first 2 for 2 reasons-they weren't easily accessible and I hated to spend so much at Motherwear... I do have a few I got used this time around but just wondered if they really made things easier and more discreet-not that it matters that much to me-my kids were always so LOUD when they nursed LOL
Take care
Ann