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Would you breast feed someone elses child? - Page 6

Poll Results: Would you bf someone else's child?

  • 54% (410)
  • 9% (70)
  • 36% (278)
    Depends on who .... ie family, close friends
758 Total Votes  
post #101 of 235

would and have

I have two friends who had trouble bfing. The first one developed a horrendous case of mastitis in both breasts. She was incredibly ill and needed sleep desperately. So I stayed with her and treated her mastitis with herbs and poultices while (with her permission) I nursed her baby. This went on for two days until she felt human again and was able to get a hospital grade electric breast pump. It took her baby eight weeks to learn how to nurse from her breasts, but she persevered and eventually it worked.

My other friend also had trouble bfing and when I got to her house to see how she was two days after the birth, her baby was weak and dehydrated because she hadn't been able to get any milk. With her permission, I bfed her baby because I was really worried about her condition, and I knew breastmilk was the only thing that would quickly bring her back to normal. I also did it to help the baby learn that milk really does come out of breasts, and that she could nurse from her mamma! I think wetnursing a baby who is having trouble with her own mamma's nipples is valuable because the baby learns that breasts are for nourishment, and the mamma learns that her baby is not defective and can bf. All that is usually needed is to get rid of the engorgement and soften up mamma's nipples.

I think nursing other's children in certain situations is the only logical compassionate thing to do. Bfing is nourishment. It is not such an intimate act that it can't be shared. No matter what, breast is best.
post #102 of 235

Because I am not comfortable with that idea. No and never are strong words and I mean them.

I'll be flammed for this, but I would rather my dd have formula than nurse off someone elese.

No offense to anyone on this thread who would do otherwise. Just not my thing.

post #103 of 235
Thanks. I respect that you feel that way.
Just a different route than me. I commend you for your truthfulness.

I am not sure if I put this on earlier post or not but the first time ds nursed from my sister I cried and cried (felt betrayed) but I had to do something, Babe had an aweful stomach problem and "expert doctor" said all formula particles/proteins were too big for his tummy to handle, and I was having all kinds of trouble getting him to latch onto such engorged breasts, damage on the nipples was severe. (I still have scars 9 months later) I had not slept for two weeks etc. It worked for us.

This time (in two weeks) it is really so dh and I can go out together without babe in tow. We haven't been able to do that.

Interesting that we all can be successful & fantastic Moms doing things various ways!!

K: BabyE'sMomma
post #104 of 235
TNmom2, if another mother pumped breastmilk, would you object to your baby drinking it from a bottle? I'm just trying to figure out if it's the milk itself that bothers you or the process.
post #105 of 235
I answered the OP questions. I am not going to get into semantics of if, an or buts over my answer.

I will not be checking back on this thread anymore. Just because I have a different view I shouldn't have to keep answering questions about why.

Have a good day.
post #106 of 235
Well, since she's not going to read this thread any more, I guess there's no point in my explaining that I meant no offense. I was just asking a simple question. I was trying to understand her point of view. I thought that's what discussion boards are for.

For the record, my question was not a point of semantics. My question addressed the very substance of her comment.

I guess I'll never know if it's another woman's milk that's objectionable or another woman's breast. Does anyone else on this thread have a guess as to which thing you think it is that some people object to? I really just would like to understand the other point of view.
post #107 of 235
Devrock, I could never speak for another person, but I think I can understand why another mom wouldn't ever want someone else to nurse her baby, even though I don't feel that way myself.

I think when the issue is that emotionally charged for a woman, there are some attachment and jealousy issues at work. Many women just don't want to risk exposing their baby to potential pathogens in another mother's milk, but when you say 'no, never, not even my own sister,' I think it's more emotional than physical.
And I think this is more common with new moms than with moms with nursing toddlers since the mother-baby connection is so intense and close during the first months.

But I want to emphasize that I could never presume to know for sure why another mom would be so against wetnursing. She must have her own very personal reasons.
post #108 of 235
WOW! Poor Dev.

Perhaps Tennessee mom was having a bad day? I know I get defensive and read things the wrong way when I am feeling crappy

Hope she feels better soon
post #109 of 235
I don't think I could, but then again, I'm one of those new mommies. My babe is only 4 months. Now, I would probably be able to nurse another child, especially if the child really needed m.m. but for emotional reasons I could not have someone else bf my child.
post #110 of 235
have and would.......
my sd has a son 10 weeks younger than ours. she saw how great it was for our first so she did bf him. she had some issues with him having to stay in the hospital longer so I gave her some ebm till she could pump. when she came hom she wanted to go out so i gave her some morre. think maybe 100 ozs or so overall. after she weaned him at 3 months I was watching him and he wouldnt take abottle so i nursed him cause i had no idea what to do. he did settle down .
it was a shame didnt didnt last long.....
angel mom to grace 5/12/99 and still nursing fool drew 25 months.
post #111 of 235
Hi all.....

I'm in the process of doing just this! A very good friend of mine had a baby 3 weeks ago. She must return to work for 6 days to train her replacement. Yes, it stinks, but in order for her to receive her bonus for the year..blah blah blah..

Anyways, after her both her mom/dh tried unsuccessfully to give the babe a bottle of ebm, she called me in tears. We had talked at legnth about various options - baby cup, teaspoon, syringe etc.....and, I also "put out there" the option of nursing him myself. *I'll be the one keeping the baby for the time she's away..

So, long story short - she brought the baby by last week to spend some time with me, and to see if he would even latch....she was SOOOOOO greatful that I'd even be willing to try ! And...well, whaddy'a know ? Little man latched on like a champ - nursed both sides for 10 mins each, let out a big burp, and promptly went to sleep....it was amazing !

What was also wayyy cool, was how open she was to all of this. We have been friends for a while..and well, I wasn't even sure that she'd be interested in it. I always told my dh that I'd nurse another youngin' if need be.....she is TOTALLY for this and we decided that although she'll still pump at work to keep up her supply, she's not going to even attempt the bottle again since it's for such a short period of time - I'll just nurse him the week he's here...

How cool is THAT ?
post #112 of 235
Very cool!
post #113 of 235
Originally posted by Devrock
I guess I'll never know if it's another woman's milk that's objectionable or another woman's breast. Does anyone else on this thread have a guess as to which thing you think it is that some people object to? I really just would like to understand the other point of view.
For me it would be "another womans breast" that would be my problem. To me bf'ing was a very personal bond between me and my child. Maybe I also feel this way because I was very unsure of how long I would bf for and always felt like I was gonna fail at it and put him on a bottle before I or he was really ready.
That's just something Only *I* wanted to be able to give my child.
We bf'ed for 1 yr, by the way.

I enjoy reading all of these "wet nurse" stories though.
Those times must've made you all feel real special

Mommy to Jonathan:mischeif 19mo and shawn 14.7yo
post #114 of 235
I said yes, because, well, I've done it!
My SIL and I had our first 2 babies within weeks of each other. We lived in the same house. We often nursed each others babies so the other could go out to do shopping, spend an evening with DP, go to doctors appointments, etc.
My 2 youngest brothers and my first 2 are weeks apart too, so my mom and I nursed each others babies as well.
A close friend of mine got really sick and had to take medication that got into her breastmilk. The doctor suggested supplementing with formula and pumping her milk to throw away to keep up her supply, but her baby wasn't having any nasty formula. So I nursed her for the 10 days her mama was on meds.
Now, with hep B and HIV so prevelant in our society, I would have to be really sure about the woman who nursed my baby. That would be my only issue in this day and age......
While we were nursing each others babies, we just developed a special bond with each other and each others babies, it was actually kinda sweet!
post #115 of 235
WOW!I just wanted to say these stories are remarkable!You women are amazing,and so are the mothers of the children you wetnursed.
post #116 of 235
I voted that I would and I wouldn't mind if someone bf'd my child.
post #117 of 235
i would, depending on the circumstances. its such an intimate relationship between mother and child...but in some situations, i think it would be okay with me to nurse someone else's child or have someone else nurse mine.

there is a woman in oklahoma who is being charged with public indecency for breastfeeding someone's child at a daycare center. how disturbing. if it wasn't something normally done, then i would be upset...but to bring the police ito it??? very strange....

woman charged for breastfeeding other woman's child
post #118 of 235
I haven't read all the posts, but I voted it would depend on who. I have nursed my sister's child and she has offered to nurse mine (though I never took her up on it...she is a smoker). I would nurse a few of my friends kids (in theory...none of them are nursing anymore) and would only be slightly squemish about them nursing mine (if my baby were desperate, I would be o.k. with a nip at another breast to tide them over). I trust that the friends I have in mind do not have anything communicable, I am just a little weird that way...
post #119 of 235
Just an aside here.... i nursed my friend's baby at 6 months and again at 7 months.

At 6 months, his level of understanding was "oh cool, a lady with milk! Hi nice lady!". At 7 months, his level of understanding was "who are you and why are you trying to nurse me? Oh but you do have milk in there..." He wouldnt take a bottle or cup. And I only had to be persistent about it the first time, after that during the rest of our adventure he would latch just fine.
post #120 of 235
I actually tried once, in a LLL meeting, but my child didn't like it at all and wanted breasts back
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