I'm trying to figure out what might have been helpful for me to know...
One question I have had is...why do they want to put drops in the eyes of a surgically born baby? Makes no sense to me.
I am super-crunchy, hate the medical profession, and so on. Hired the WRONG midwives and they plopped me straight into c-section-land. After we got to the hospital we fought The Man for 6 hours, but after 4 days of labor and so on, we were just too tired to fight anymore, no nurses were allowed to come in and help me birth, etc etc etc etc...c-section.
I was bleeding a lot so they were still seriously working on me when E was shown to me. I could not hold him. Know that this might happen. If so, and if there will be people waiting in the recovery room, make sure everyone knows if YOU allow them to hold the baby before you do. I didn't know that everyone was on their way, and so MIL, Aunt-in-law, friend, and so on held my son before I ever did. If that would bug you, say something NOW.
I don't know if the anesthesiologist put extra in my epidural (I didn't mind...didn't want to be awake for surgery anyway) or if I'm just really sensitive, but I fell asleep during the surgery and didn't wake up until DH told me we had a son. I guess I fell back asleep until I heard him wailing his lungs out, then he was brought to me. Then I fell asleep again. Know that this can happen.
The drugs afterwards (percocet and ibuprofen, along with the morphine thing they put in the epi just as the surgery was finishing) made me REALLY hazy, and I have very few memories of the days after his birth. Even though I was only in hospital 42 hours after he was born, it felt like forever and yet I barely remember it. Know this can happen, buy a tape recorder and a videocamera to capture as many moments as you can. Bring lots and lots of film, both B&W and color. We only had B&W because we thought it would be a nice messy homebirth. Then we had a nice "clean" c-section, a too bright room so we shut the curtains, and the experiments with the flash just didn't work well...led to some really fuzzy shots. Matches my fuzzy memories, but not so great for documenting the moments. Have lots of film and lots of disposable cameras around.
At my hospital they bugged the everything out of us until we bathed Eamon. He was a "biohazard" because he had spots of dried blood on him. We wanted to wait until we were home, but "had" to give in to get them off our backs. Know that this might happen.
This was my first birth and baby, so I can't compare, but nursing was really super-important to me, so I just did it. Some moms give up or do it later, because it's too hard with an incision. Someone mentioned that codeine can dry up the milk, and I *believe* that percocet has codeine in it (it's related to vicodin, and I know that vicodin has it). Learn the football hold and learn it well. It's your incision's saving grace.
Our nurses just made sure that one other person was in the room with me and baby; they didn't even care if all three of us were asleep, just as long as one other person was there. I even had E in bed with me; he has never slept alone except for an hour nap here and there...the nurses didn't mind. So your mom might not be absolutely necessary to keep everyone together, depending on your hospital.
I'm almost 7 weeks out and am finally starting to feel like a human.
The perco and ibu made me hallucinate for awhile, and it was such a strong hallucination that I didn't realize then couldn't verbalize it for DAYS. If you're having strange thougths that someone is giving you different babies every day, or that there's a small robot needing to have a computer chip changed (explaining the loud wailing coming from the robot) next to you, please tell someone. It was that computer chip thing that I was finally able to verbalize (I'd wake up with a cottonball-tongue the size of the moon and couldn't speak) to DH, and after that he woke when Eamon cried, to make sure I was taking care of him through the hallucinations.
I had a lot of pain, I had a lot of lochia (finally almost stopped, knock on wood) that turned bright red whenever I'd do too much. Don't do too much.
If your husband is going to watch the surgery, tell him it's quite an experience. Robert still can barely speak to me about it. He's probably able to tell friends about it, but looking at me and telling me what they did to my body is just about too much for him. It's not a gentle surgery. At the same time, he enjoyed watching it in a strange way. Eh, he's odd. He also got to be in the room watching the monitor as I had my eyes Lasik'd.
What else? I hope my experiences can help you...I didn't look into c-section AT ALL because I sooooo did not think I'd be going there. Or if I did, it would be a true true true emergency. The middle ground that I found myself in has thrown me for a loop, and part of me is OK not knowing about it, and part of me wishes I'd looked into it just a little eensy bit. So I hope I help.
If I've mentioned something that doesn't make sense, ask! And if you have specific questions, it's all still fresh in my mind (what I remember), so ask.
But I hope it's all moot and that you can birth the baby in a non-surgical manner.