HBing September Mamas?

[plantmommy]

I know of at least one HB mama due in sept. posting on the HB board, but I know there's more of us in here!

Am I foolhardy to not have someone lined up to look after my older kids this time? Last time, I had a dear friend come, and her job was just to look after the older kids (who were then 2 and 4) but she didn't make it until I was ready to push, anyway.

Labor was fine and dh was available to the kids until I hit transition, and actually I was hanging out with them for most of the time, anyway. When transition was coming on, we popped in a new video, and ds went and laid down in his own bed, in his room (which he NEVER did) and took a nap, as we were laboring in my bedroom (right next door) at the time. My friend ended up taking photos for us, as dd hung out and watched new dd being born. Ds woke up right after the birth.

This time, the kids are quite a bit older, with my youngest being the age my oldest was then.

I'd have someone come to be for them, anyway, but I don't really have anyone! I've since moved, and don't know anyone close by, and the friend that was at dd's HB is both working and caring for her 6 mo. old. The in-laws would be happy to come, I'm sure, but I just know that m-i-l would probably stress me out just by being in the house, and that she would not let the kids come and go from whereever I was, as they pleased, which I'd like them to do. I know she'd try to be helpful, but her idea of helpful and mine are rarely the same thing.

[adventuregirl]

Oh yeah, there are a bunch of Sept HB-ers. I'm one and I can think of at least three more off the top of my head, and I'm sure there are more.

I have no other children, so I don't know what I would do in your situation. But, you know them, their temperments, etc, so you would be the best judge anyway. I'd say really think about the energy of the situation both ways and see how you feel about them both. Since they are older, you probably won't need someone quite as much as if they were little, and they will listen if you or your dh make something very clear. Sounds like your mil might be more stress to you, and you don't need that.

I'm starting to think about getting my supplies, that is exciting. Trying to decide if I should bother with renting a birth tub or getting a kiddie pool. We have a hot tub outside that could be nice for laboring if I want, we also have a pretty deep bathtub too, so I don't know if I should further crowd our 800 sf house with another item. I am not set on a waterbirth, but I know I will want to labor in the water, so I'm leaning towards a no on that.

I am really excited to give birth in my home. I just feels so right to me.

[chrissy]

Me, I'm a September mama planning a homebirth! I"m so excited about it. I think about it and visualize what it might be like almost every night before I go to bed. With Noah I was induced and it took 36 hours and it was so awful and so painful and so uncomfortable. And then when he was born they thought he had swallowed too much fluid so I didn't even get to touch him for about an hour and a half (while they were busy sewing up my 4th degree tear, by the way). Then after I held him they took him away to the nursery and I kept having to ask and ask and ask before they finally brought him back.

So, this time is going to be soooooooooo different, I hope. I really like my midwife and I think we agree on everything labor and birth related.

I am hoping to definitely spend a lot of my time in labor in a tub or pool, and might deliver there too, though like Sheryl said, I'm not tied to that. I'm just planning to do what feels right at the time.

As for your question about other kids, I really don't know. My MIL lives right up the street and she and Noah are very very close. So we're planning for her to be here as Noah's support person. She and I don't always see eye to eye so we'll definitely have to have some discussion about how things will go. I really want her to be there to just follow Noah's cues. I would *LOVE* for him to see the baby being born, but if he's not up to it then that's fine too. It sounds like your kids might be fine without a specified support person. Maybe your MIL could kind of be on call just in case.

Sheryl, how fun to be gathering your supplies!! I'm supposed to have mine by 36 weeks so I've still got 8 weeks to get them. Are you ordering them all in one package from somewhere or amassing them yourself?

Now I think I'll go sew and daydream about laboring on a beautiful late summer day in a big tub of water on my back deck.

[Kabes]

Me too! . . . .I hope. Dh is against this too (just like we disagree on circ.) Anyway, I am the one giving birthand I'm not leaving this house. I'm really excited I've always wanted a water birth and to catch the babe myself. With dd#1 the MW at the birth center wouldn't let me get into the tub. I had my records reviewed by the lead midwife and she said there was no reason for this!!, grrrrrrrr With my dd#2 I was allowed to labor in the tub but not to birth ther - against hospital policy. Of course when the time comes I may end up wanting to be out of the water; I'm open to that too. I just don't want anyone telling me I can't. Or makeing me do or not do things that are against what I want. This happened quite a bit w/ my other labors.

I haven't found anyone to be support for my girls. Everyone I've asked is either unwilling (a lot of my friends are still single and don't want to be 'scared' out of birth!?!) or unable to commit (they have small kids of there own). I've thought about trying to hire a doula but I'm afraid someone else will try to control my labor.

[3boobykins]

We're having a homebirth in Sept, our second one with the same midwives we had for dd. We're planning a waterbirth again--absolutely loved it last time! We used the inflatable "fishy" pool, which we bought online for 20 bucks. We didn't end up keeping it--it was winter, and it got so dirty in the yard that we just tossed it, so we'll have to order a new one. We also plan to get a reverse pump to siphon out the water this time immediately after the birth. Last time it sat in our living room overnight and didn't smell too great by the next day! Also, dd will only be about 19 months when the baby arrives, and she's a little fish--we don't need her to go for a swim in bloody water!

For first-time hbirthers--I definitely recommend having all necessary birthing supplies on hand by 36 weeks, or whenever your midwife can legally attend your birth at home. DD arrived at 36 weeks, 2days, and I had JUST finished buying everything the day before.

As for our other kids, we'll be calling my mom early in labor. She lives about 1.5 hrs. away and has a wonderful relationship with dd and ds. DS was almost 3 when dd was born and was present for the birth. My mom took him for a walk during the more intense parts of labor, and we called her on her cell when I started pushing. We're not sure about dd--our midwife thinks she'd be fine at the birth, but we'll just play it by ear.

Chrissy, I get really excited visuallizing the birth also! We had such a beautiful experience with dd's birth (and ds's unexpected hospital birth as well), and I just can't wait to do it again, although I'm hoping this one holds out to at least 37 weeks.

[ilex]

Me too! Interesting that everyone here is planning a partial waterbirth. I was thinking about this yesterday, but our house is quite small, maybe in the yard, but I don't know how comfortable I will feel with our too close for comfort neighbours nearby...

The most important thing, Plantmommy, is that you are not stressed, or worried about your kids. That you can concentrate on the task at hand and know they are okay and taken care of, and that you are comfortable. I am having almost the opposite problem...too many people want to be here!! And I feel like my picking and choosing is offending some like my mil and sil...BUT they will be 5 minutes away so I can call on them anytime if I need to. I am going to have my dh and my mom and possibly my sister here...and the midwives and maybe a doula...1-2 people for my dd on and off, but my 1st labour was 7 hours, so hopefully this one will be similar.

Right now I am in major nesting mode, just trying to fix up our newly moved into house, the way I want it before the baby comes. But it is really nice to put all of this energy into the place where the baby will be born.

[CdnAloha]

I am planning a homebirth too. I am also back and forth on the waterbirth. My bathtub is okay, but it's just a regular size. I'll see if I am motivated to get a fishy pool and pump sometime in August. I am pretty sure I would enjoy being in the water, I'm just not sure I feel like setting it up. DH says he will go with whatever I feel like.

I feel like homebirth is the only way to go for me. I love being at home at any time especially when things are going on...can't think of a bigger and better event than birth.

Cheers,
Julia

[JenInMpls]

To everyone considering giving birth in water, please, please, pretty please make sure that you sanitize your pool or tub before birth... My MD friend told me a nightmarish story about a 3-day-old being brought into neonatal ICU for a raging systemic staph infection after having been born into a birthing tub at a local hospital (no kidding!) and aspirating contaminated water because the tub had not been properly disinfected.

The birth process is designed to create a vacuum in the lungs on the way out, pushing out all of the liquid in the lungs and creating the situation to suck in air after birth.

I know it's a rare situation and that water birth is wonderful, but just be careful... you don't want to spend the first 2-3 weeks of your new baby's life visiting it in NICU.

Jen the paranoid

[Mom2baldie]

Jen,

Wouldnt that nost likely not happen at home though because the germs in our tubs would be germs we are familiar with already?

Ive always read you dont have to worry too much about stuff like that happening at home for that reason. Obviously in a hospital you will be coming into contact with germs, bacteria that youve never "experienced" before and thats why ther would be a problem?

[chrissy]

Also, I thought babies don't breathe until they come out of the water. I mean, of course you aren't supposed to let them hang out under water for a long time, but if you catch them and then bring them to the surface won't they wait until the air hits them to breathe? (whew, that was a long sentence)

[Mom2baldie]

Planning a homebirth here also. Still undecided about waterbirth. I figure I will do what feels right at the time. I labored almost completely in water with DD, and Im sure I will spend lots of time in my tub this time as well, but who knows where I will feel like pushing...

I am also thinking about getting some supplies together, although there really isnt much to get. My midwife gave me a list of very basic stuff: towels, washrags, dropcloth, plastic mattress cover, extra set of sheets, cotton balls... and I pretty much already have everything. I looked at some of the places where you can buy birth kits, but I think most of that stuff would remain unused so we wont bother buying one. Seems like a waste of money (for us, since we have NO money at the moment and most of it was not even on the supply list). My midwife said the most important thing is to have food to eat during and after labor!

So it looks like I am already all set!

And, about the childcare, I am having a friend come and help my DH watch my children if Im laboring during the day. Hopefully it will be during the night though and they can sleep through most of it!

[Mom2baldie]

Chrissy,

I dont know for sure, but I dont think they breathe until their skin touches air...or maybe until their umblical cord touches air that they have the reflex or whatever to began breathing?

I dont know, havent really read much about waterbirth, since Im not THAT interested in having one.

[Robertsgirl]

ME TOO ME TOO!!!! We are having our first in Sept and planning a homebirth. Our midwife provides a rubbermade horse trough so we have the option to labor in water. She said she likes it better than the blow up tubs because the shape of it is more supportive to the Mom pushing and also the sides are more stable. I can't wait. I LOVE the water anytime and usually work thru my migraines naturally in a hot shower, so I'm sure that diving in a big tub o water will be my first instinct in labor.

As for supplies, we have a big list from our MW but she is also really awesome in that she can tell us the cheapest places to get all of the stuff. SO COOL! She knows which dollar stores and closeout places carry all the stuff we need. The only thing we are wondering about is finding cheap sheets for a King size bed. It seems that people think since we have a King size mattress that we are made of gold or something!!!

We don't have any other children to worry about this time, but I will say that I would NEVER (OK, I KNOW never say never but) want my MIL anywhere close when I'm in labor. She stresses me out under normal circumstances!

Christi
that needs to figure out how to make a signature line for this board!

[plantmommy]

Christi, from the HB board here someone suggested getting plastic shower curtain liners for waterproofing the bed. I'm sure you could get a few of those from the dollar store. Otherwise, don't worry about it. Honestly, the only thing my midwives didn't do last time was the laundry; dh let it sit in the basement until I got around to it, two weeks later, and I just soaked everything in the washer with cold water and a bunch of Murphy's Oil Soap, and there wasn't a stain on anything! Love my Murphy's. Or, check overstock.com for markdowns. I buy all my king sized sheets there!

Kara, maybe your little ones will be in tune, like ds was when I was in labor last time; when the going got rough for me and dh had to give me all of his attention, ds went to sleep! I have read that little ones intuit the situation and respond accordingly.

The birth tub we used, and will use again is the Aquadoula, and it has a disposable plastic liner; nobody's germs but mine and dh's! I wonder what happened in that birth for the baby to aspirate the tub water? That is a very rare occasion. Isabelle had the cord around her shoulder, so was actually crowned and still under water for a few (seconds? minutes? I had no sense of time, but it was through a few cntx) and she didn't breathe until she was lifted out of the water. The baby has no room to take a breath until they are completely out of the birth canal.

[JenInMpls]

I don't know the whole story about how the baby got contaminated with staph - I know that my pal was working an NICU rotation at the time and that's how she found out about it, and the swab that was done indicated that the infection came from the birthing pool. Do note that it did happen at a hospital which means that the contamination could very well have been from the woman who used it prior to this baby's birth if the tub was improperly sanitized.

All I'm sayin' is make sure your tub is clean! I have no strong opinion about water birth and am not making a case for or against it.

jen

[OnTheBrink]

Hi! Planning a September home birth here... a VBAC, in fact. We are really looking forward to it!

I did not plan to have Emma in a hospital at all. I had planned a waterbirth with her. But, she was breech at 41 weeks when labor started. So, we had a c-section. I was disappointed, but overall, it was a good experience. My MW's husband was the OB who did the surgery. It was peaceful and included many of the things I wanted in the original birth plan - aromatherapy, music, my support people (husband, midwife, and sister), cloth diapers, etc.

My MW brings all the supplies when she comes for the home visit at 36 weeks. We just supply sheets and clothing, plus the "special" stuff we want like candles and food!

Oh, Emma will be 3.5 and very much wants to be here for the birth. She knows more than most adults about how birth happens. She is very disappointed that she fell asleep before her cousin was born at home 7 months ago. But the video is her top favorite movie! I am pretty sure she'll be present for the birth, but if not, my mother will be here as Emma's support person. (translation: book reader, ice cream server, bath giver, you name it!)

[msrog]

Hi, MommyMoses and Christi!! Please post more often. These Sept. moms are a fun group...

I am reading these posts and getting so jealous that I can't have a home waterbirth this time, WAAAAAAHHH!

I can't wait til next time, though. And I also don't think dh will be on board with the idea, at least not at first... But like Kabes, I'm the one giving birth and I'll just refuse to leave the house! heh heh heh.

Happy birthing, HB mommies!

[blipla]

Hi, I'm new around here and planning a homebirth. This is my fourth child and second homebirth. I'm switching this week from a CNM practice that delivers only in a hospital setting to a homebirth midwife. Our financial situation didn't allow it at the beginning of my pregnancy and I didn't realize how much I really wanted a homebirth until it became possible. I'm so much more into the whole thing now-and much happier too!

[plantmommy]

Savannah, I suspected twins early in this pregnancy, and had this whole scheme planned out with my midwife on how we could still have them at home. She's a licensed CNM, so she couldn't legally be the attendant if it was confirmed twins, so I was going to have a LM attend as the official attendant (my MW was going to recommend someone) while my CNM would come unofficially, so that we could still have her here, with her experience and her loving support. Luckily, we confirmed via U/S that it was a singleton, since my MW will be out of the country for a month and not returning until I'm almost 38 weeks. We had to know whether our contingency plan was really necessary. LOL!

After my first HB, I could never go back.

blipla, congrats on the realization of a dream! HB is a wonderful thing.

[Robertsgirl]

Well I may not get my homebirth after all. We had a midwife appt yesterday. We had had an US done at 28 weeks to confirm if we were having twins or not as I was measuring way ahead. Obviously we found out right there at the US that we were only having one and went on our merry way. Yesterday was the first MW appt we had since the US. She told us that we have marginal placenta previa, and since it was found this late there is a chance it isn't going to move. We have another US scheduled for 34 weeks, 3 weeks from now. We are praying fervently that the placenta moves and nothing happens to me or Spud between now and then.

I'm scared and heart broken. If it hasn't moved at our
next US we have to transfer to an OB and have a
hospital birth and probably a C section. That terrifies
me. Having my baby cut out of me and taken away by a
stranger does not seem even somewhat of an acceptable
birth to me. I know people have them safely all the
time but it is not what I want or even something I want
to consider. And I don't even want to talk about my
fears of the pain meds and the fact I'll be cut in
half, ick. And I'm scared they'll do something to my
baby that I don't want, like give them a bottle or
shots or something.

Anyway, I thought I would share here because I think alot of you could relate to how terrified and saddened I am. I just want to scream out....I"M NOT SICK AND NEITHER IS MY BABY DON'T TREAT US LIKE CANCER PATIENTS OR SOMETHING!

Christi