very worried, stressed mommy.

[katrinna]

After homeschooling my DD all of her life, she made the decision to go to school this year. We've had a lot of changes this year, and I can honestly say that maybe it's for the better. I'm working full time now, and we live on a very limited budget - the curriculum, supplies and field trips are days of the past now. She also has more personal reasons for wanting to go - she is a VERY social person and she's not happy unless there's hordes of other people around her.

Still, I'm so terrified! I laugh at myself for being so scared. I think I'm more nervous then she is! She's going into 10th grade (she's 15) at the local public school. We cannot afford private school, and I think in my heart, I hope that she'll find public school boring and violent (two things she doesn't like), and come home again.

I'm afraid mostly for the teasing she will probably get. She has plenty of friends and currently is in a volunteer program with over 350 other high school students and tells me that she's not made fun of for her homeschooling besides just general curiosity, but these are hand selected kids for this program, and they're all pretty liberal and accepting. I don't think she'll find that at BHS. How badly do you think she'll really get it when she goes back?

(Haha, I know I sound like an overprotective parent right now, and true, she does spend almost every day with her friends so who knows WHAT goes on then, but I'm just so worried).

I'm posting this on several boards on this forum to try and find something that will relieve me from these worries.

[Electra375]

I am worried too, kinda similiar sit.
I'm nervous and worried for my little boy, my dh won't let me homeschool after we have been discussing it for 2 or 3 years. DH even made a point to save an article about hs in the Washington Post this past summer.
I don't get him, but I do get the worry about sending your child into the unknown of peers (at 5 or 15).

[Blissful Bee]

Im afraid I dont have anything to add to be of much help accept to ask when her birthday is? I only ask because in AZ when I was 16 I decided to just get my GED and go to Community College for a couple years. It was great and I transfered to a University when the time was right. Just a thought, in case things dont work out so well. Or maybe it will help if its only for a little while. Best wishes to both of you!!!

[Openskyheart]

I know two grown young women who homeschooled until high school. One entered high school as a junior, and one as a sophomore. Both of them did very well in school, were very involved with activities like yearbook committee, prom committee, student government, etc. They both feel like they made good decisions.

They had both been particularly sheltered at home, and had few friends growing up. They were itching for a social life by high school. Interestingly, neither of them want to homeschool their children if/when they have them. I haven't wanted to pry, so I haven't asked them specifically why they don't want to homeschool their children, but I would suspect it would be because of the social isolation they felt growing up. Still - they were excited to learn that we are homeschooling, and they are happy with their childhood experiences. And...who knows how they will feel once they have actual children, and contemplate sending them off to kindergarten!

Laura

[katrinna]

Originally Posted by Blissful Bee

Im afraid I dont have anything to add to be of much help accept to ask when her birthday is? I only ask because in AZ when I was 16 I decided to just get my GED and go to Community College for a couple years. It was great and I transfered to a University when the time was right. Just a thought, in case things dont work out so well. Or maybe it will help if its only for a little while. Best wishes to both of you!!!

She's only 15 (her birthday was just a few days ago). I've actually discussed this option quite a bit with her, because her 18-year-old cousin -homeschooler for life- just finished with a GED, but she is very firm on the fact that she wants to go to school for the experience, not for the "learning" because she knows that public school learning is not adaquate. She also wants to have a "normal" graduation.

She's very big on being "normal" and not sticking out anywhere these days. She says she absolutely hates explaining that she's homeschooled, and that I've "isolated" her all of her life. I'm feeling a lot of mother guilt these days and lemme tell you, she knows exactly how to make me feel bad. : Sometimes I'm almost glad she's going back because I get so irritated with her behavior, but I'm praying and hoping that it's just her age and not a permanent attitude problem (now wouldn't that just suck.).

[luv my 2 sweeties]

She's very big on being "normal" and not sticking out anywhere these days.

Given that she's 15, I'd say these feelings make her *very* normal! :LOL

I'm sorry it's such a tough time for you. Mine are still little, so who knows what the future holds for them, but I think I'd be nervous too! From what you describe, she sounds like a great kid who is generally well adjusted and well liked. I bet she'll do fine. (Either that, or she'll see what a drag school is and come home. I know of some kids who went that route. They decided to go to school for social reasons, but soon descovered that the school schedule allowed little room for socializing and crowded out all the other things they enjoyed doing. So they went back to homeschooling. ) Here's a hug anyway!

[ErikaDP]

Hi Katrinna,

Speaking as a unschooling momma who was floored 4 years ago when my 15 year old decided that he wanted to go to high school, I know of the emotions that you are going through.
Well I can say from my experience, that the adjustment to high school was much harder on me than it was on my son.
But because we had always taught him that his education was his responsibility, I wasn't about to deny him the opportunity to exercise his right to choose where he wanted his education to take place. So off to high school he went. And he really had a great experience because it was his choice to be there. He did everything that he needed to do to make his school life work. And he took on none of the negative aspects that people talk about when they mention high schoolers.
He has some of the best kids I have ever met as friends and he has a confidence that I thought my shy son would take many adult years to acquire.
I also think that one of the single biggest reasons why his high school experience was a success was because he knew that he could come back to unschooling at anytime and that it would not mean that he had failed. Also, he had a few specific interests that led him to clubs and activities that made it easier for him to find people who he would have a least something in common with.
He was so proud of himself and of us, his parents, for living up to what we had always taught him. And we are so proud of him. He is a freshman in college this year and his whole educational background prepared him for that.
So while your daughter's experience may be different, my best advice to you is to encourage her to make the choice herself and to help her in any way you can to make it successful. Also remind her of all of her other options, including coming home if that is what she wants. Good Luck!