no pain meds - Page 2

[sparklemom]

Being surrounded by people who support your desire for a natural birth is key. Also educating yourself. Bradley worked well for us.
Laboring at home as long as possible was key for me. We didn't leave for the hospital, as the Bradley method suggests, until I couldn't smile anymore between contractions which was a good nine hours into labor for me.
Relaxing and releasing were my strategies during labor....relax between contractions, release during contractions (in other words allowing my body to do it's work..not fighting it).
It's natural for any woman to want relief during the absolute intensity of giving birth. It takes a great deal of preparation and support to have one especially in a hospital setting.

[orangebird]

Originally Posted by stafl

I really can't speak for anyone but myself.
For me, the reason my first birth ended with cesarean after a typical intervention-avalanche was that I didn't realize how hard it is to fight hospital policy. I was educated, I'd read all the right books, but I wasn't really prepared for the way I was treated in the hospital by the on-call ob (my doc wasn't on call that weekend) and the nurses there. How, every time I questioned anything at all I was treated like a juvenile delinquent and it was hinted that I cared more about "natural childbirth" than the safety of my baby. I had no idea of the emotional blackmail that would go on and all the psychological tricks they have of manipulating patients into compliance. So, for the birth of my second DD, I made sure to give birth in a supportive atmosphere (ie, not at the hospital if I could at all help it). I also did a much better job of educating DH about what I wanted, and why, so he could help me stand up for the things I believed in.
In short, the difference for me was in preparedness (not necessarily education) and in choosing the right care providers and birthing place for me and my unique situation.

Yes, I't scary isn't it? I went through a stage where I wanted to be a midwife. Due to all the legislative crap it is hard to do homebirths here and after working in and seeing the running of a hospital L&D I thought NO WAY!!! I can't let myself fall into that horrible hospital policy BS. What a shame.

[thismama]

I had a 48 hour labour (the last 24 hours were very painful). No meds, although I got transferred to the hospital in hour 44, stuck at 6 cm, and requested an epidural (yelled and begged for it actually, and tried to line up demerol in the meantime, but I couldn't have demerol coz I was too close and by the time the epi came I was 9 cm and was able to decline it with everyone's encouragement that I was almost there).

I would say...

Read Birthing From Within

Know that if it's anything like my labour, it's gonna hurt like hell, beyond what you can imagine. I found the shock of the pain to be hard, and I felt like I wasn't coping well or I must be a wuss. If you can't believe how much it hurts, you are NOT A WUSS!!! It really hurts!!

Get a doula, and a good, committed birthing team. I needed three people to press on my hips with all their strength, one minute on, one minute off, for hours and hours. I looked around wildly for a backup plan in case they all quit on me (they were panting and sweating), and decided I would jump out the window. I announced that to them, and folks seemed to rally more energy.

Stay outta the hospital until the last minute. I found that once I was there, with meds available, I wanted them. By the time the epi came I was so far along and having such intense contractions that I was almost more afraid of having to stay still for the epi, than to just keep doing what I was doing.

Have access to a bathtub. I found water to be like a miracle for the pain.

Moan low instead of high, if you can. I would need coaching on each contraction, but it really helped manage the pain. High moaning made me feel fearful and childlike, and I needed to be my grown woman self to deal.

Have a safe word in case you decide you do want the epi. I told everyone to tell me "you're doing great" etc if I asked for meds, but had a safe word to use if I didn't want to hear that anymore and just wanted drugs. Knowing I had an out helped me deal longer.

Know that by the time you decide you really can't do it without meds, you are ALMOST THERE!!

Good luck!

[babynell]

Originally Posted by doctorjen

If at the peak of an intense transition contraction someone says to you "This is only going to get worse, why don't you let us give you something to take the edge off?" you're more likely to feel you need pain meds than if someone says "You are working so hard and doing such a great job. Your baby will be here soon."

Haven't read this whole thread yet, but this is EXACTLY, word for word what a nurse said to me while I was in labor. She went on to tell me that the Stadol (sp?) might make me a just a little spacey, but nothing that I would notice!!

Well let me tell you, I was NOT just a *little* spacey, I was hallucinating in between contractions and the whole thing lives in my memory as a scary bad trip type experience. As a result I think I'm now more scared of my upcoming labor (edd 11/14) than I was of my first

The only plus was my midwife did chew the nurse out pretty well for interfering. Hopefully things will go better this time.

[Teensy]

I think what probably helped me that most was the nurses and my OB followed my birth plan and, as I had requested, never offered me medications. At some points, I might have just said yes if they were offered. Thankfully, they never were.

Other than that, the main thing that helped me was feeling like I had something to prove. A neighbor who had talked up how she was going to have a natural birth but then ended up choosing an epidural told me there was no way I was going to give birth without an epidural. I guess I wanted to prove her wrong (and I did, twice!).

Other things that may have helped some: I requested a Hep-lock, instead of an IV. I spent most of my labor in a hot shower. I didn't fight being hooked to monitors occasionally, but I didn't hesitate to inform the nurses that I was taking it off and getting back in the shower - I didn't wait around for the nurse to unhook it. And I read Natural Birth the Bradley Way so many times I think I had it memorized.

Good luck!

[Jennifer H]

I had some very specific strategies that were suggested at my hospital birthing class.

1. Don't let them start an IV... in my hospital you have to have an IV running for at least 30 minutes before an epidural will be given. I figured that 30 minute delay, knowing relief would not be immediate, would help me get through it.

2. "Two more contractions" - at the point when you are so sure you MUST have the drugs, just tell yourself (and your birth partners) that if you still want them after two more contractions it is okay. My contractions tend to come in waves (four or five on the same level and then they escalate). By the time I was through the second one at that level I felt like I could handle it.

3. "Twenty-four hours" - this was my own time frame. My mother had very long labors and I assumed I would too (not even close). I felt that if I had gone drug free for more than 24 hours then I would give myself permission to get some rest with the epi. Come up with your own time frame.

Prepare for the worst. My pain was never as bad as I imagined it might be. I think this helped me stay drug free. Also, the hospital I was at did an excellent job of being supportive of doing it without the meds. The nurses and midwives never undermined my desire by offering me medication, but they did offer other help (the shower, showing dh better massage techniques, giving me options for positions, etc.).

[AmyB]

I have never had a pain med that didn't make me sick with nausea, extreme dizziness, nausea or headaches, and the worst was a demerol/valium mix that I was given for dental surgery-- I couldn't move but I could feel everything.

So for me personally my history of bad reactions to pain meds was scarrier than childbirth.

I used Bradley Method relaxation and visualization. Another thing that helped was that someone told me that childbirth pain is more like a bad stomach ache than, say, a root canal (this might be from "Birthing from Within) . In fact, when the nurse offered pain meds I was off in some kind of labor haze and I just said "it doesn't hurt". For me the pain never came anywhere near to being intolerable and I really liked being able to feel what was going on.

--AmyB

[Tiggs]

For me it had a lot to do with mindset. I was determined I didn't want an epi and I knew it would hurt but to me the needle in my back was just freaker.

My labor was very intense but also very fast. I arrived at the hospital at 1am 2 cm's dilated and he was born at 6:48am with no pain meds.

Having everything happen so fast made it easier to stick through the pain.

[kater07]

On Thursday, I went in planning no pain meds. I also went in meaning to take a NST then LEAVE and go home to labor.

My MWs tricked me into staying there... or trapped me there more like it.

They used scare tactics to keep me there against my will. They strapped me to monitors so I could hardly move. They wouldn't allow me to sit up, which is how I could manage contractions best after they started me on really high doses of Magnesium Sulfate and 3x the normal amount of pit (b/c the Mag. Sulfate stopped them and they couldn't get them started again). I haven't gotten my records but someday I will. I believe they gave me the dose to STOP premature labor when it was supposed to be a dose to control blood pressure.

I labored on that crap for 24 hours. Then, on Friday, after having had NO FOOD since wednesday night and no sleep b/c I couldn't get comfortable with the monitors poking me and the crappy labor bed, I finally asked for pain meds thinking they'd relax me. They did allow me to haze out into a very loopy sleep, but then I was stressed b/c I stopped dilating and couldn't focus.

Go Figure. I really didn't want the meds for anything except to relax me. I didn't know that Stadol has a high rate of halting dilation.

I don't think that anyone can say 100% for sure that they won't want pain meds in the hospital b/c no one can be 100% relaxed there and there are sooooo many interventions that happen to most people while they are there that it can wreak havoc on your ability to maintain the mindset you went in with.

I don't know if that helps. Sorry...

[broodymama]

Originally Posted by mara

the first thing the nurse had me do was get in bed and strapped a monitor around my belly. I thought it was temporary but despite the fact my sons heart rate stayed perfect she would never let me take it off. She placed an IV in my arm, I tried to refuse it, she said she needed to start fluids since from now on I cant eat or drink Then when I said I want to get up and walk around, it hurts too much to lay in the bed, she said I can't because it would be too much trouble with all the equiptment. OK, what the hell is that about? At the time I was so naive. Naive and in so much pain. I didn't know I could stand up for my self and tell them to f off. My dear husband didn't either, he was just as naive and scared. We dumbly thought the nurses had that kind of authority. We blindly trusted them. After a few hours she told me I wasn't relaxing enough with the contractions. She said I needed an epidural. I said I don't want an epidural, I just want to get out of bed. I needed a new position. She helped me get a little on my side (gee thanks!) I was still stresses out and writhing around in pain with the contractions. She still refused to let me out of bed. She said If I didn't get an epidural I would harm my baby. I got the epidural. Biggest regret of my life. When it was time to push they said they turned down the medicine, that I should be able to feel enough to push. Nope. I couldn't feel a damn thing. Three hours later, pushing to the stupid 1-2-3-4-5-6... I still couldn't feel anything. The nurse got two more nurses and they stood over me and pushed on my belly while the DR used the suction to pull.

Personally, I'm worried about something like this happening. At my 36 week appt I asked my doc about IVs and monitoring. He asked what I wanted, and told me that IVs were usually "standard procedure" in the hospital, but since I didn't want one to tell that to the nurses and I wouldn't have to have one. As for monitoring, he said they need to get a 45 minute reading on the baby and then I could remove it and that I wouldn't have to wear the BP monitor and 02 monitor that I had before.

When I was hospitalized at 30 weeks for PTL everything happened so fast and I was completely overwhelmed. It really made me wonder if I will be able to stand up for myself when the time comes to deliver. (No birth centers or homebirth midwives near me.) I understand that I needed intervention to stop my labor, but the catheter, etc?

Bottom line, do I have the right to decline the "automatic" IV in the hospital, if my doctor is not there? Can they make me stay in the bed on my back, or can I move around and change positions? Can I wait and push when my body tells me to, not when some doctor or nurse decides it is time just because I'm fully dilated? I'm especially worried about this if I go into the hospital when my doctor or midwives aren't on call. (There was another doc on call when I went into the hospital with PTL.)

As you can tell, I really have no idea what my rights are as a patient, what I can decline. : Advice or suggestions? (Not trying to hijack the thread, just looking for help. )

[lilylove]

YES!! Lady Bug. There is informed consent AND informed refusal.

[sparklemom]

You're checking into a hospital, a place of business, NOT a jail! Remember that. You HAVE to be your OWN biggest advocate. Let things like "hospital policy" go in one ear and out the other. Don't allow yourself to be bullied or steamrolled.
This fact made my second birthing experience MUCH!!!! better than my first where I was a "good" patient. I knew what I wanted and that was what I expected, period. (And I'm one of those "always be nice" chicks, so sticking to my guns went against my unfortunate always nice nature. But with something this important I was able to be polite, but still unwavoring on my intentions and wishes.)

[LittleOne03]

I'd say that the MOST important factor in me not getting an epidural was my husband. I had done much research even before pregnancy and knew that I wanted to do birth completely naturally. I knew it was going to hurt, but also knew that women did it for thousands of years before they had epidurals, and also that pain hurts, but you aren't going to die from the pain. My husband was in strong support of my plans and my thoughts and had strict instructions to talk me out of an epidural if I changed my mind during labor. The whole process went completely different than we had expected, however. I ended up being induced, which led to constant monitoring. I was able to stand and sit on the birth ball for awhile, which was great, but before the contractions had even gotten that bad they couldn't keep my son's heartbeat on the monitor, and BAM! I was in bed, flat on my back, oxygen mask on my face, and stuck. The pain increased rapidly and significantly at that point. I went from hardly any pain to extreme pain (and contractions one after another, with no break in between). After an hour or two of this, my water broke. I was sure that I had made some progress, and so I was completely crushed when they checked my dilation and I was at a 3, which I had been for the 4 weeks prior to being induced. That was the absolute lowest point for me. I cried and told my husband I couldn't do it, I needed pain meds and I needed a break. He was FABULOUS! He stayed very calm and reminded me of all the reasons I wanted to do it without the epidural. He also reminded me of all I had gone through for the last 9 months to ensure that our baby was healthy, and I didn't want to throw that away at the very end for something that could be harmful to both of us. He was incredibly encouraging and supportive, and never left my side for a minute through the entire thing. Two hours later when they checked me I was at 8 cm, and at that point I KNEW I could do it!! We also decided at that point to ignore the order to stay laying down, and I stood on a stool next to the edge of the bed for each contraction. My husband made sure the monitor stayed on the baby the whole time so they wouldn't lose his heartbeat, and he supported me through each contraction. Less than 20 minutes later I was complete. Honestly, transition was the easiest part of my entire labor after the contractions really started. So, I would say to make sure that your support person knows all the reasons why you have decided to forgo the epidural and is prepared to remind you of those reasons when the going gets tough!

[paccookie]

Originally Posted by reader

I agree that staying the heck out of the bed made a giant difference. First of all, laying in bed (especially on your back) is very painful. Plus it puts you in the patient mindset. Care providers also see you laying in bed in pain and want to do something to fix it -- they see you as a patient rather than as a birthing woman. You're a much more formidable force on your feet, on the birth ball, in the tub, etc.

I agree with the above. With my daughter, I didn't know how to advocate for myself. I was 20 years old, not sure what I wanted/didn't want and didn't know how to stand up to authority. I had a long labor, almost all back labor (she was posterior). I went to the hospital way too early and they sent me home twice before they finally kept me. I had a shot of demerol and an epidural. Although the nurses said I was pushing well, the dr used the vacuum (total pushing time was only about 10-15 minutes so I have my doubts that my pushing was a problem, I think it was an impatient dr). I held dd briefly, then she spent the next 3-4 hours in the nursery. I finally nursed her when they brought her back to me about 4 hours after her birth. With my son, I knew exactly what I wanted. lol I wanted a drug free birth and that's exactly what I got. I wrote an extensive birth plan and presented it to the nurses when I arrived at the hospital (I had discussed it with my MW ahead of time, but that didn't matter since we got the on-call dr's MW). I let them do their inital hour of monitoring, then I got up and walked. Dh and I walked all over that floor of the hospital, I think it was about an hour or two total. I wore their gown, but I asked for a second gown to wear as a robe, plus I wore my pajama pants and underwear because that's what I needed to be comfy. lol The only interventions we allowed were a heplock (it's VERY hard to find any of my veins) and I let the MW break my water at 8 cm. I gave birth standing up, leaning over the bed. I didn't plan it that way, that's just how it happened. lol And it was so much easier to push in that position than flat on my back like I was with dd!

Anyway, I think going med-free depends on a lot of things - your attitude and desire to be med-free, your support, the hospital's attitude (my hospital had made some major changes for the better since dd's birth and they were very helpful to me with ds's birth), your support person's attitude, your care provider, etc. I had to close my eyes and just breath deeply through the contractions. I had to have silence. lol Each person is different and you have to find what works for you. I think if you can find what works, you can do it.

[paccookie]

Ladybug---Yes, you can decline the IV. But you may have to be very firm about it. If you want to compromise, you can offer to do a heplock. That way you aren't tied to an IV but they still have the "instant access" they see as required. I personally found the heplock to be the single most annoying aspect of labor, but it WAS better than an IV. You aren't supposed to get it wet and it hurts if you bang it against something and it gave me a bruise after it was removed.

Something I found extremely helpful was writing a birth plan and giving it to the NURSES at the hospital. Your dr is likely not going to be the one caring for you in labor, it will be the staff nurses at the hospital. Ultimately, they are the ones (of the staff) who will most influence how your birth will go. Don't be mean unless you have to, but do be firm in what you want.

[broodymama]

Thank you for the info, everyone.

[Kundalini-Mama]

I was very well researched before the birth of my son, and I had said, the only way I'll get meds is if I'm tired so that I can sleep.

His labor was 60 hrs long, all of it back labor. So, I didn't sleep for 3 nights and was exhausted. I wanted something to help me sleep. I got some morphine w/an IV, and was able to continue contracting every 5 min, this time doped up, and having to pee. It was freakin' lovely.

Fast forward to the birth, my son was blue and not pinking up. We got to spend a lovely 4 days in the NICU at an awful hospital where I was threatened w/CPS involvement many times a day for various issues (the Vit K shot was a big one-this was NY state), where they decided my son had a PDA---the valve btw his lungs and heart didn't close as it usually does shortly after birth. All they did was give him a ton of antibiotics (in case of infection), found out there was no infection, and for the next 18 months my son is allergic to every single food on this planet, until we finally saw a homeopath.

No, I'm not bitter at all.

But honestly, and I have no research to back this up, just my instinct, is that the morphine caused the PDA. I think it depressed his system.

Had I known all this, I would have gone w/the homebirth I really wanted, despite my fears that my pugs would eat the placenta. :LOL I also wouldn't have put so much faith into hypnobirthing. I know that did a lot for a lot of women, but, for me, it really set me up to fail. Why am I having pain? What am I doing wrong? I practiced at least 2x/day, I was on bed rest for what was thought to be preterm labor, ended up being an irritable uterus, so I had plenty of time. Still it didn't work and I was completely taken aback. The nuchal hand, and thus, elbow in my spine didn't help either.

Amy

[orangebird]

Bottom line, do I have the right to decline the "automatic" IV in the hospital, if my doctor is not there? Can they make me stay in the bed on my back, or can I move around and change positions? Can I wait and push when my body tells me to, not when some doctor or nurse decides it is time just because I'm fully dilated? I'm especially worried about this if I go into the hospital when my doctor or midwives aren't on call. (There was another doc on call when I went into the hospital with PTL.)

Legally you have the right, but if you are unlucky and get a nurse who has her own agenda she will basically blackmail you, as Stacy referred to it. They will pressure you and make you feel that you are not doing the best thing for your baby if you go against them. Be careful and be strong! Your doctor most likely won't be there during labor, the nurses have their own protocols and you really have to work with them more than anything. I agree about being a little flexible, like getting a heplock just to shut them up. You have to pick your battles. The system in this country is so awful. I can say this with experience from both sides of the fence, a patient and a nurse. UGH! Makes me just sick with anger. OTOH, you might get lucky and get a great supportive nurse. This is one of the reasons I am reconsidering going back to doing L&D. At first I couldn't stand it for all the reasons in this thread, but on the other hand, I think if I went back and did it at least there would be a nurse on the floor who would be willing to stand up for moms like us.

[orangebird]

They used scare tactics to keep me there against my will. They strapped me to monitors so I could hardly move. They wouldn't allow me to sit up, which is how I could manage contractions best after they started me on really high doses of Magnesium Sulfate and 3x the normal amount of pit (b/c the Mag. Sulfate stopped them and they couldn't get them started again). I haven't gotten my records but someday I will. I believe they gave me the dose to STOP premature labor when it was supposed to be a dose to control blood pressure.

Why did they start you on mag?