If a thread must be deleted...

[oceanmommy]

If a thread must be deleted...

...I wish there were a way(s) to give a bit of closure or a warning first. I was thinking, what if there was a standard message that was posted when a thread is being watched and in jeopardy of deletion...something like..."Warning: This thread is in danger of being deleted due to_______(violation of rules ? lack of productivity ? the fact that people are getting hurt and it is not supportive ?) Please stop this behavior immeadiately. Mothering supports only respectful dialouge..."

Some people may not know it could happen. Some people may not see how out of line it's getting. Most will want to save the thread and will comply, at least they are getting the chance, well knowing the consequences if they don't play nice.

It is disconcerting to have your careful thoughts deleted without knowing about it. Of course, the integrity of the boards, and the tone of respect, must be maintained.

I have nothing but thanks and praise for the Moderators and Administrators.....thanks for making this a place we can all feel welcome in.

A way to warn that a thread is in danger,,,just a thought...or maybe after the thread is gone a note in it's place that thread XYZ was deleted for not maintainiing respectful dialogue, etc. Something ?

Thanks for your consideration

[Cynthia Mosher]

Hello oceanmommy - thanks for your suggestion. Let me explain our general policy.

Our usual procedure is to do as you have suggested. When we find a thread getting heated we ask for everyone to calm down, be respectful, remember the rules, etc., etc. If the posting is really inappropriate (troll, porn, spam, slurs) or if the moderator's post is ignored and the inappropriateness continues then there is nothing further to offer. The thread (or post, as the case may be) can be closed without further notice though I do advise the moderators to post a "thread has been removed due to blah blah blah" message to let everyone know what happened. In the heat of an issue we may forget to do so, or may get called away from the computer for mommy-business before getting it up there. Fortunate for us someone will post almost immediately to ask what happened to it and it will be explained by the mod, me or another mod. Yes, it would be best for the mod to post an explanation and I will remind everyone of that.

We have had a few threads removed in the recent past due to behavior. Regardless of the discussion we cannot and will not leave personal attacks and excessively adversarial and conflict baiting discussion on the boards regardless of how many people have spent time posting to the thread. Such things are no longer just a conversation of heated disagreement but become a reflection on Mothering and on this entire community. Our procedure is to move the thread to a private administrational board for review. If the thread can be edited or posts deleted we will have this done and return the thread to the board. If the entire subject or discussion is inappropriate it will remain off the board.

Allow me also to say here that I have seen a complaint or two along the lines of "you deleted this discussion but I've seen much worse left". This may very well be true but rarely is it because it was left. If an inappropriate discussion is not moderated it is likely because a moderator has not seen it or it is under discussion with me about it. In some cases a moderator may have made the decision to allow the members time to work things out in the discussion but be mediating privately with the members involved to ask for editing and respect in the thread. If anyone comes across a discussion that is in clear violation of our User Conduct Rules they should take the initiative to report such discussions to me so that I may look into it myself.

Thanks for taking the time to address this subject with us. Your concerns and suggestions are felt and appreciated.

[oceanmommy]

Thanks !