Just a hypothetical question....

[degeeter]

If someone were to approach you while nip and ask you to either stop or leave, what would you tell them?

I was wondering because I've read a lot about imbeciles doing just that lately and I was curious as to how strong breastfeeding advocates would react in that situation.

It's never happened to me, but if it did,I am not sure exactly what I would do or say. I know I definitely wouldn't stop, leave or move the the bathroom but I don't really have a response planned out.

[Lula's Mom]

I think my first response would be to smile and say innocently "No, thank you, we're just fine where we are" as if I didn't understand, and thought they were concerned for my comfort. If it was an individual, not an employee, who continued to comment, I'd say that it was really none of their business, and they were welcome to go elsewhere if they were so bothered.

If it was an employee and they said someone complained, or was uncomfortable, or that they had a "store policy" requiring a nursing mom to cover up or leave.. Grrrrr. I'd remind them that nursing is my right, anywhere my child and I have a right to be. I'd say it is the law!!! (it tends to impress people that there's a law on the books protecting that right, though personally I understand that breastfeeding isn't actually illegal in any state ) Businesses these days do NOT want to get sued or even get bad press, and when the law is on our side they're more likely to tread lightly.

I would LOVE to trot out that "If it's making you uncomfortable, feel free to put the blanket over your own head!" remark. :LOL

[Elphaba]

It just happened to me for the first time about 2 weeks ago. We were in a museum in Paris, and one of the docents told me to go to the toilet, and I just looked her in the eye and said "Non." And proceeded to switch breasts and resume my conversation with my almost-3-year-old.
That was that. She was like "you don't want to?! We have a bench."

[degeeter]

Originally Posted by Lula's Mom

I would LOVE to trot out that "If it's making you uncomfortable, feel free to put the blanket over your own head!" remark. :LOL

Ha! That's a good one. I'll have to remember that.

[annettemarie]

I've been waiting for this to happen
It sort of happened once, someone kept telling me there was a dressing room, and I just kept smiling and saying no thank you. She probably thought I didn't speak English. I wonder if that would work (pretending not to speak English)

If someone really pushed me,I would say, you know, there are no laws on the books forbidding me to breastfeed in public, but there are no laws specifically protecting it either. The way I see it, it would take a huge lawsuit to bring it to the public's attention. I would *love* to be the one to bring that lawsuit on...

My other answer has been to say, there are parents out there who beat their children, starve their children, who do all manner of nasty horendous things to their children. Why would you possibly fault me for loving mine?

Annette

[bec]

I would start out nice, but unyielding, as a pp stated. If they really wanted to push the issue, though, they would have to call the cops and let them inform the person requesting I leave of my rights. I'm so not even going to play around with my right to feed my child.

Of course, all this is pretty moot for me, as I am pumping for my youngest and bottle feeding her, so nothing for anyone to get "offended" about.


Bec

[mom2threenurslings]

I would also start out by saying that I was comfortable right where I was, then go on to say that my right to nip is protected by law. If it was in a store or other business, I'd ask to see the manager and nicely inform him of the law and of my rights. If I still had a problem, I'd walk out ... only to come back the next day with whole bunch of my nursing friends (and I know TONS of people who nurse!!!) . We're really good and nurse-ins!

Several months ago I was approached by the pastor of my church, who said that the only reason he was approaching me is because he needed to be able to honestly tell the person with the problem that he had spoken with me about it. It seems a member of the congregation, who also happens to be one of the parents in our multigenerational Sunday School, is deeply offended by my nursing, is extremely uncomfortable with it, and doesn't think it's appropriate for his child(ren) to see. The pastor has no problem with me nursing my children and spent several sessions with this person trying to convince him that God gave me breasts and I was just using them as God intended! :LOL It still didn't convince this man. So ... after the pastor appologized for the zillionth time for even having to have the conversation with me I told him that it was actually a very easy matter to deal with. I would continue nursing my kids (I was triandem nursing at the time!!!) and he would tell this person that it is against the law for him to ask me not to breastfeed....and that in the state of CT he could get fined for asking me. He was very relieved to have such a concrete answer (as opposed to opinion or philisophical reason!) for this person. I haven't heard a word about it since, and was even nursing my 2 year old daughter in the sling when I went up for communion this past Sunday!

[KKmama]

I would certainly say no. I'm not certain how I would express myself--it would depend on the situation, but no is the answer.

[Sustainer]

I would say "no, thank you, I'm fine." If they pushed the matter, I would inform them that I have the right to breastfeed wherever I go.

[zerby]

I had this happen with my MIL, the B#&$^. At a wedding, Kelsey got hungry so I fed her. I was sitting in front of a pew of nuns (MIL is a catholic school principal). She scurried past at the end of the service and told me that it was disrespectful to do THAT in church. I told her that Jesus was breastfed, so I doubted he had a problem with it there. One of the nuns agreed with me, and patted Kelseys head. MIL didn't speak to me the rest of the night, but that was fine with me

[nova22]

I have never been asked to leave, but if I do I am ready. DH has memorized the VA clause stating that NIP is exempt from the indecent exposure law. I would look up and smile, and say "Of course I will leave, but first may I have your request in writing so I can show it to my lawyer?"

[soccerchic21]

Originally Posted by degeeter

If someone were to approach you while nip and ask you to either stop or leave, what would you tell them?

This has actually happened to me. I just told the woman that I was protected by my state law to NIP...(I was in a state run office at the time) She insisted and I had to just say "I will not stop feeding my baby!" UGH :

If it happened to me at the mall or a restaurant I think I would say that we are perfectly comfortable where we were. I can't wait for the day someone tries to do it with my DH around.

Actually I don't hear much about women being asked to move when there husbands are with them.

[Mama2ABCD]

after getting over the initial shock of such a suggestion, i hope i'd have enough wits to ask "why?" maybe when the person had to go into the detail of why they'd realize how ludicrous they sounded!

[Greaseball]

I'd remind them that I have the right to NIP anywhere, and that it's not necessary for me to cover up, and I'd ask them why they were looking. If they say they "can't help it" I'd remind them that only crazy people really can't help what they do; everyone else has free will.

If it was in a business and they claimed to have a "policy" against nursing, I'd ask to see the policy and voice my surprise that they would have a policy that was against the law. If they offered me a nursing room, I'd let them know that nursing rooms are meant to be optional and are not required to be used.

And if they gave me the "But this is a family establishment!" line, I'd remind them that my baby is part of my family.

[spero]

"No. But if it bothers you, feel free to look the other way...I'm sure we'll both be more comfortable."

[rareimer]

i would probably just say, "no," and look at them like they were crazy for even asking such a thing. if they persisted, i would say, "no, my baby and i are quite comfortable here, thank you." if they still insisted that i leave, i would say, "no, the law protects my right to nurse my child wherever i am permitted to be, and if you don't like it, then feel free to look away."

[jessanddanny]

My MIL and I went out to lunch last week with my kids and once we sat down to eat she asked me if I'd like her to run out to the van to get a blanket to cover Seth up with. I replied, "Why? If someone wants to look while I'm feeding him, they deserve to see a little nipple...I could care less." She went on to tell me, "It really bothers ME when you nurse him in public, we ARE in a restaurant after all, you need to be discreet." I just pretended like I didn't hear her and proceeded to feed him. What does my MIL do?? She grabs one of Seth's prefolds and puts it over his face...OOOOHHHH that just pisses him off and he stops nursing, arches his back and pulls the prefold down...exposing EVERYTHING!! You should have seem my MIL's face! Jeepers...you'd think him nursing quietly, showing nothing, would be preferable to THAT!!

I get so frustrated with people's ignorance!

[lauraess]

Jess: Ha! I guess she wont be doing THAT again! I'd have a hard time not taking the diaper and sticking it in her face while she ate. :
Laura

[Clarity]

I must be too scary. I've had whispers but nobody's said anything. And I am a *VERY* brazen BF. No discreet here, apart from maybe doing it so absently, that most people probably don't notice.

Ok, I admit once before I was this good at it somebody said something in the lobby of the *BIRTH CENTER*! She thought I was too exposed (my shirt was up on both sides and you could see my pretty polka dot Bravado) and her kids and DH were coming in. I told her we'd be done soon and they could wait outside if they'd be more comfortable. What I really wanted to say, with my month-old on my chest, was "Look B****, my babe is 5lb. Each of my boobs weighs more than that. I only have two hands. I am incredibly lucky to be managing to BF at all with what we've been through So I'm gonna do it if I have to sit here buck naked." The next visit the midwives kind of apologized and said she was wacky and religious. She was also, much to me and my sister's amusement, wearing the very ugliest maternity shirt we'd ever seen. So we felt it was justice in a way.

[darsmama]

Uhh, as I posted on a previous thread before. I think I would up and leave just to avoid a confrontation
But before you flame me, please know I haven't ever had a child before so who knows? I may reply with something much stronger then anyone posted here. Plus, I'm really beginning to 'feel' that there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with me nursing in public, and I have every right too! So MDC is making me a better person all the time!