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Crying all day about sick baby - Page 2  

post #21 of 40
9/7/04 at 9:52am
I just read the update. Things are not going well. My heart is breaking for this family.
post #22 of 40
9/8/04 at 8:45pm
I posted on the Dec '03 Babycenter board while I was TTC/PG and the first few months after my daughter was born so was around when Allie was first diagnosed. I read her updates daily and have often times found myself sobbing then days later refreshed with new hope. Today's update has hit me so hard, I've been in a funk all day. Its amazing how many people know of this baby girl and her struggles.
post #23 of 40
9/8/04 at 9:34pm
this is so sad. i haven't cried this hard about something in a long time, i can't stop. praying so much for their family, for this little girl.
post #24 of 40
9/10/04 at 10:45am
Thread Starter 
Here's how I've come to terms with Allie's situation:

I was (and am!) feeling so sad about the whole thing and have been grieving for her a lot. I think it hits home more than ever because Nitara is almost Allie's age. Well today I finally was able to find a little bit of peace. I was thinking of my brother Adam (who was shaken/beaten to death) and why things have to happen to innocent babies and children. I started thinking about how Allie's going to pass-- in the loving arms of her parents, free of pain thanks to drugs. I think we can find beauty even in sad situations. I think her passing will be very peaceful and full of love.There are so many kids out there who die at the hands of violence, who suffer alone and in fear. Allie is lucky. The whole situation sucks,but Allie is going to pass peacefully. In her sweet little life she has known nothing but love and security from those closest to her.

Darshani
post #25 of 40
9/10/04 at 10:54am
It hit me hard too because she is only a little older than my dd and looks like her in some pics, and cannot imagine the pain her parents are going through. I have been upset ever since I read about it. That is a wonderful way of looking at it USAmma. I am sure they have learned a lot about love too, and read where the mother said she would do it all over again just to have this time with Allie (paraphrasing - sorry) and was so touched. It certainly makes you think about a lot of things and get things in perspective thats for sure, and am sure.
post #26 of 40
9/10/04 at 11:27am
Thank you Darshani, very beautifully written. 2
post #27 of 40
9/10/04 at 2:08pm
darshani, you're right. thanks for the new perspective. 2
post #28 of 40
9/12/04 at 12:48am
Like you guys I have been following her story for awhile, and I think of this precious baby and her family constantly. My daughter is 6 weeks older so it's just so hard, you know, to read her updates and then go in to bed to snuggle my own sweet baby girl...I feel guilty, and on the other hand, fear, like what lurks inside my child's body that hasn't shown itself?

Between Allie and Samuel (Jen of Mom and Me Creations' son) I am reminded on a daily basis what riches I have that could be taken away in a heartbeat. In one way it makes me a better, more patient and giving parent, in another way it's unhealthy for me to dwell on the problems of strangers...perhaps. But this is reality. Through these children, I have learned of the problems of childhood leukemia without going into the hospital myself. I definitely am more inclined now to donate to hospitals and Cancer funds, and sometime when my children are older I would like to volunteer in the hospitals, if only to hold the children whose parents cannot stay all day with them.

p.s. I am glad they've chosen to keep Allie in the hospital and can totally understand their discomfort with the idea of bringing her home to die "in peace". The hospital is normal life for them and her and I think they'll have a much more peaceful passing there.
post #29 of 40
9/12/04 at 1:17am
Quote:
Originally Posted by halah
Like you guys I have been following her story for awhile, and I think of this precious baby and her family constantly. My daughter is 6 weeks older so it's just so hard, you know, to read her updates and then go in to bed to snuggle my own sweet baby girl...I feel guilty, and on the other hand, fear, like what lurks inside my child's body that hasn't shown itself?

Between Allie and Samuel (Jen of Mom and Me Creations' son) I am reminded on a daily basis what riches I have that could be taken away in a heartbeat.
I feel the same way and have been really upset about this the past few days, and focusing on being grateful for what I have. I think sometimes people come into this world with a strong lesson to teach, and in her short life she has opened so many people's eyes to love and giving and many other things it seems. Not much comfort to her parents but their story and the way they have chosen to share it has really affected a lot of people in so many ways, not a small gift to give by any means.

PS I am really worried now as I checked on their website for Updates and this is what it said:

Saturday, Sept. 11th--Day Fifty-Six

10:25pm--I want to post a longer, more detailed post, but I am waiting for the news broadcast. It should be airing after the football game tonight on Channel 8. I will write either later tonight or tomorrow morning.

It was about the candlelight vigil they had for Allie. I am still praying for a miracle for them.
post #30 of 40
9/13/04 at 7:57am
I read Allie's story and my heart breaks for this family. I don't know what to say, the feeling is so raw. My ds was born in 12/03, and I realize how lucky and rich I am that he is healthy.

I just don't understand why these things happen? Why to a precious little innocent babe? I just want to know why...
post #31 of 40
9/13/04 at 3:05pm
Evidently she's not doing very well at all right now, there was a message on her guestbook that her church's prayer tree got word that she's nearing the end. As if this isn't already heart-wrenching enough, three years ago today my grandfather passed away from non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma - I lived out-of-state and due to the flight restrictions from 9/11 I was unable to come home to be with family. Off-topic but I'm just in a rut today...
post #32 of 40
9/13/04 at 10:58pm
I just read todays update. The cancer has gone to her central nervous system now and she is in extreme pain. They have upped her pain meds and added in something to help her relax. The way i understand it all the family has been called in now. This poor family. It is so heartbreaking.
post #33 of 40
9/13/04 at 11:05pm
Oh Lord...
...
...
I can't begin to express how deep I am feeling this right now. I just cannot begin to comprehend the horror and hopelessness of parents to see such a precious little girl suffer so much pain. Just to think of them holding her while she cries every minute of the day... And evey time I visit their site and Allie's happy little face smiles at you - it is just overhelming.
I am praying so hard for her pain will end soon. I just cannot comprehend why things like this happen...
...
I believe in a heaven, and it makes me feel so much better to know Allie's parents do to. I hope this little angel soon wakes up healthy and well either here or in her heavenly home...
post #34 of 40
9/14/04 at 1:46am
Little Allie is gone. www.scotthousehold.com

She passed tonight at 11:05.

My heart aches for her family. I am happy she is not in pain. I am just sick.
post #35 of 40
9/14/04 at 9:41am
DH and I sat and cried last night and prayed together for her pain to go away. She is waking up in heaven now - no more pain with as much love as she felt throughout her little life.
May God bless Allie and her family.

post #36 of 40
9/14/04 at 10:04am
This sounds hokey, but it's true:

Last night as I went to bed (before the final update) I was praying in the dark that her pain be stopped. Suddenly the dark bedroom became lighter, and I could clearly see my sleeping 10 month old in her cosleeper. I never figured out what source the light came from.

I went to bed at midnight, that's 11pm their time. I would like to believe that the light was Allie.

Aside from that, I feel deep sadness today, but as the day dawns I have to admit it is better than yesterday. I felt such heaviness hearing of her pain, imagining her crying through all those sedatives...I was useless yesterday. Now I think I want to take the kids somewhere quiet in nature and just think of her and her parents.

How hard it will be for Jenny to leave the hospital without Allie--I wish there's something we could do for her.
post #37 of 40
9/14/04 at 11:28am
She didn't have the news up when I went to bed last night, and now I'm sitting at my desk at work and crying.

There's no longer anything we can do for Allie in person but I believe there are things we can do for Jenny and Andrew, and to honor Allie's memory....

Make a donation to the Light the Night walk in Allie's name to help find a cure for leukemia.

Sign up to be a blood, platelet, and bone marrow donor. For the latter, all it takes is a blood test. Every time you donate blood or platelets, you are saving a life. If you are called to donate bone marrow, you give someone else a chance at life.

Make a donation to Jenny and Andrew to help defray their crushing medical bills.

I hope Jenny and Andrew and their families will find peace, in their own time.
post #38 of 40
9/14/04 at 12:02pm
In memory of Allie.

She was here for such a short time yet impacted so many of us, I think I will always treasure my dd so much more because of this, and be so much more aware, and she helped me get a lot of things in perspective. I am so sad she is gone but feel more peace she is no longer in pain. She had such a bright light for such a small baby. I feel so much for her parents though, and hope they find some peace in their hearts.
post #39 of 40
3/16/06 at 10:28pm
I'm bumping this thread up because I met Allie's mama at Target today. We struck up a random conversation (she is uber-friendly) and got on the subject of her dd that passed on. I didn't realize who she was until I got home and got to thinking about it.

It will make you happy to know she had a beautiful 4 month old baby with her, Maggie, who is the spitting image of Allie. We chatted for a while and she was just the nicest person and she seemed really happy and in love with Allie's little sister.

Anyway, a strange coincidence.
post #40 of 40
3/19/06 at 4:00am
I wasn't here when Allie's story was first posted but I read it (made myself read it with tears streaming down my face) on the Scott's website. What a truly amazing family they are and what a lot of love they have to give this new baby daughter. I'm happy they are in a better place. I'm sure Allie is looking down from heaven at her little sister.
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