slapping hand when reaching for outlet?

[crazydaisy]

hey yal,
my dd is only 11 mo and i have been doing the whole moving her away from harm (cords hanging, outlets...). but a friend said she only used slapping the hands during "dangerous" moments. would rather not slap my child - anytime - and think it is sorta silly sounding when she said that she slapped her child when he was going to hurt himself really badly (like finger in outlet). "so you hurt him b/f he hurt himself?" that was thought...not said!!! anyway, just would like to know what other mommies do when dc is going for something dangerous (hot stove, outlet...). distraction with toy? move them out of harm? strong tone in voice? (by the way, i try to do the whole "NO!", not scream, but just really stern and dd laughs...hee..hee.. hard not to laugh when my girl is so cute!)

i guess my friend wanted her dc to learn to not touch it, even when she wasn't in the room. but my thing is you need to watch your child. realize i have a 11 mo old and that is easy to do since she is just crawling now.
would love some ideas. thanks,
-kate

[kama'aina mama]

No. Just no. I don't approve of hitting kids at all but even sensible advocates of hitting children know better than to hot their sensitive, fragile little hands. No way.

[sadie_sabot]

well, getting some of the outlet covers would be a good start.

with dd, if I see her going for it I stop her- if I am close enough I block her hand and then tell her it is not safe, then redirect or distract her. if I am not close enough I will say "no, Not safe" in as commanding a voice as possible, to startle her away from her plan in order to give me enough time to be there physically to stop her.

But in general, I try to divert without making a huge deal out of it; I've noticed with my dd that if I make a big deal out of things, she gets really interested. But I do try to tell her why I am not letting her do whatever "ie, No, dd, the stove is hot and if you touch it it will burn you. let's play with your play stove. No, dd, that's electric, it will hurt you, it's not safe. that kind of thing.)

( while visiting my dad last week, dd reached for an outlet and me, my dp, and my step-grammma all said "NO!" in loud, stern voices all at once. Poor dd collapsed in tears!)

[birthmommom]

when my dd was that age i had the same problem, i also dont agree with hitting b/c i dont think that is teaching them anything about the outlet itself. i used to pull her away and say "baby owee" and "that will hurt the baby" if i was too far away i would do the sturn no, and then go and move her. now i can tell her no and she gets it (she 17 months now) oh another thing that helped was "that is not for babies"

good luck.

[mamaduck]

I covered all the outlets. Not just with outlet covers, but also by blocking them with furniture so there would be no visual access. I blocked cords with furniture or used heavy tape to secure them. I taught my babies what "hot" means from very early by allowing them to gently hold their hands near enough to hot things (like my coffee) to feel some heat and understand what I meant. Then if I ever saw them in danger I could say, "Hot!" and they would know to back off and wait.

Maybe I got lucky, but I felt that my babies/toddlers generally trusted my judgement and listened to me about dangerous things.

[maya44]

When my kids used to do that I would slap ...my own hand! I would say "NO!!! That could hurt (slap my own hand) oww! " This really caught their attention and they seemed to "listen" to it and stopped reaching for the outlet or stove.

[allgirls]

outlet covers...of course are a

part of child safety...then redirection same as for anything else...

I never ever slap little fingers..how sad!

[azyre]

Are outlets really dangerous tho? As opposed to say, a door, that can close on small fingers etc? I wonder about this one - we have outlet covers but I am thinking she'd need to get her hand on something very thin and metallic to stick in there, and she isn't usually that dexterous at 16 mo - she still can only get the "easy" shapes in a shape sorter for example. I have let her explore the outlets with her hands. After all there are plenty of dangerous things she will learn to use in good time, they are only dangerous if misused.

I have spent a long time thinking about this. I wonder if denying all access to them will either make her more likely to play with them unsupervised, or less likely. I do not worry about when she is supervised. I guess a lot depends on the nature of the child -and she always kicks up a major fuss when redirected already, and rarely falls for my creative attempts at redirection (This doesn't stop me trying, I figure her frustration at being redirected is ok for her to express and part of me practising keeping boundaries). But I think that banning them will make her MORE likely to explore them unsupervised at a later age when she is more able to hurt herself. I don't stop her doing other stuff because there is an element of danger.

We do have outlet covers but think that they aren't much good. If she can stick something in an outlet I assume she can much more easily pull something out? If I am missing something obvious out about outlets let me know, because that could change my mind!

[cinnamonamon]

I use outlet covers (and Leah -- let me assure you -- they are NOT easy to pull out...). My problem is that ds has learned to unplug & plug things back in!! Just yesterday I walked into the room my ds was playing in (at a friend's house -- my house is proofed against this), and there he was wiggling around the plug with his fingers RIGHT NEXT to and TOUCHING the prongs as he pushed it in (crooked & only 1/2 way) and pulled it back out -- I actually saw sparks! I ran up to him and yelled (I was scared out of my mind) "NO, THAT IS NOT FOR IAN - OWIE - WE DO NOT PLAY WITH PLUGS AND OUTLETS!!!"

When I got to him I grabbed his hand and took it away. Then I sat down with him & told him very sternly that it was an owie and could hurt him (all the while pointing to the outlet and say "that's a no-no for Ian -- no touch!). From the look on his face, I think he had already been shocked once or twice. I don't think it's really that bad of a shock, but what if next time he finds a metal fork & puts that in there instead of a plug??? I know that would increase the shock!

I still shake just thinking about it...



PS...I'm always open to gentler ways to respond -- so please feel free to constructively critisize!

[Piglet68]

We also used outlet covers, and while DD still can't remove them she has been able to unplug appliances for a long time. So while outlet covers do provide safety and reassurance, DD still had to learn "outlet safety". And yes, it requires that you hover and supervise and explain that it's not safe....and eventually they get it.

I think it should go without question that slapping is just not an option I would ever consider under any circumstances. It in no way sends the message "hey, this is a dangerous thing and you should be careful". Instead it just surprises the heck out of the child, fills him with emotions of defensiveness, surprise, even fear....it creates an aversion perhaps, but an aversion to exploration, IMHO. Ick.

[StephandOwen]

I agree with the others- use outlet covers and just keep on explaining that it is an owie. I've been dealing with that problem too. 2 year old sister has learned to take the outlet covers off so I'm constantly finding them and putting them back. DS (10 months) has learned to unplug things so that isn't helping the situation. I just pick him up, explain that's an owie, and find something else for him to do.

[allgirls]

Originally Posted by azyre

Are outlets really dangerous tho? As opposed to say, a door, that can close on small fingers etc? I wonder about this one - we have outlet covers but I am thinking she'd need to get her hand on something very thin and metallic to stick in there, and she isn't usually that dexterous at 16 mo - she still can only get the "easy" shapes in a shape sorter for example. I have let her explore the outlets with her hands. After all there are plenty of dangerous things she will learn to use in good time, they are only dangerous if misused.

I have spent a long time thinking about this. I wonder if denying all access to them will either make her more likely to play with them unsupervised, or less likely. I do not worry about when she is supervised. I guess a lot depends on the nature of the child -and she always kicks up a major fuss when redirected already, and rarely falls for my creative attempts at redirection (This doesn't stop me trying, I figure her frustration at being redirected is ok for her to express and part of me practising keeping boundaries). But I think that banning them will make her MORE likely to explore them unsupervised at a later age when she is more able to hurt herself. I don't stop her doing other stuff because there is an element of danger.

We do have outlet covers but think that they aren't much good. If she can stick something in an outlet I assume she can much more easily pull something out? If I am missing something obvious out about outlets let me know, because that could change my mind!

My hubby says there is not enough electricity from an outlet to hurt anyone, just a shock really...he is well educated in electricity...we have covers but he says it's really unnecessary as they wouldn't get hurt by the shock

[Dreamer]

Fyi:

I'm not trying to make light of this situation, but wanted to let you ladies in on something that I just found out recently.

I work at the power company <mapping, not really with electricity, etc> and I was talking to one of my 'uppers' the other day, talking about the outlet issue, and he told me that for there to be any electricity coming out of a residential outlet, BOTH holes have to have something that will conduct metal in them. Meaning, if a kid takes a pair of scissors & sticks them in one prong hole, nothing will happen. Now, if they take say...a gem clip...have the dexterity to unwind it, stick it in one hole, and then stick the other end in the other hole, and still have some sort of grip on it, yes...it can electricute them. BUT. Residential voltage is WAY lower than say a downed powerline on the street.

Hope this gives you ladies a little relief. I'm not saying don't teach your children about safety around electricity, but I'm just hoping to calm some of those 'mommy nerves'!

Hope this helps!!

Alayna

[GingerbreadMom]

Originally Posted by allgirls

My hubby says there is not enough electricity from an outlet to hurt anyone, just a shock really...he is well educated in electricity...we have covers but he says it's really unnecessary as they wouldn't get hurt by the shock

When I was 15, I babysat two little boys (ages 2 and 3) and their 6 month old baby sister. When I was in the bedroom changing the baby's diaper, the two year old stuck a FORK into an electrical outlet. He screamed and screamed absolutely BLOODCURDLING screams. It HURTS bigtime to get "just a shock" and I don't want it to happen to my baby!

Also, in the U.S. we have two kinds of electrical outlets--110 volts (the usual ones for lamps, computers, tvs) and 220 volt (for stoves, ovens, dryers, and other appliances that draw alot of power). I was changing a burner on an electrical stove not too long ago and accidently shorted out some wires. It vaporized two inches of the metal lead on the voltmeter that I was using. I'm certain that if I had been the medium thru which the electricity shorted, I would be dead.

While a shock from a 110 volt outlet might not kill an adult, we are talking about BABIES. A powerful enough electrical shock can stop a person's heart or cause it to defibrillate. I don't think that we should downplay the danger of outlets for babies. None of us want to find out the hard way, I'm sure.

Ok.... I'm going back into lurkdom now.

[CerridwenLorelei]

the best ones

I have found are the "swingback" covers.. they require a good deal to turn them to use a plug

[princessalex]

It's not as hard as you might think.

Originally Posted by Dreamer

I work at the power company <mapping, not really with electricity, etc> and I was talking to one of my 'uppers' the other day, talking about the outlet issue, and he told me that for there to be any electricity coming out of a residential outlet, BOTH holes have to have something that will conduct metal in them. Meaning, if a kid takes a pair of scissors & sticks them in one prong hole, nothing will happen. Now, if they take say...a gem clip...have the dexterity to unwind it, stick it in one hole, and then stick the other end in the other hole, and still have some sort of grip on it, yes...it can electricute them. BUT.

This isn't really so hard to do. When I was a kid (I think, about 5 years old), my parents were ripping out old carpeting. Apparently, I noticed the similarity in size, and grabbed a carpet staple and stuck in right in an outlet. Both prongs.

It knocked me on my butt (literally!), hurt like (well, something really, REALLY bad! ), and made my thumb black.

I've respected 'lectricty ever since! (okay, so, "feared" might be a better word!)

But, it's not exactly something I would want my kids to have to do!


namaste,
alex
phoenix, az

[allgirls]

Originally Posted by Dreamer

I'm not trying to make light of this situation, but wanted to let you ladies in on something that I just found out recently.

I work at the power company <mapping, not really with electricity, etc> and I was talking to one of my 'uppers' the other day, talking about the outlet issue, and he told me that for there to be any electricity coming out of a residential outlet, BOTH holes have to have something that will conduct metal in them. Meaning, if a kid takes a pair of scissors & sticks them in one prong hole, nothing will happen. Now, if they take say...a gem clip...have the dexterity to unwind it, stick it in one hole, and then stick the other end in the other hole, and still have some sort of grip on it, yes...it can electricute them. BUT. Residential voltage is WAY lower than say a downed powerline on the street.

Hope this gives you ladies a little relief. I'm not saying don't teach your children about safety around electricity, but I'm just hoping to calm some of those 'mommy nerves'!

Hope this helps!!

Alayna

Actually this is what hubby said...thanks...he explained it to me but I forgot the details exactly...thanks for the reminder

[allgirls]

and after all that I do have to say I don't ever want my baby or anyone else to get a shock...I have outlet plugs in all of them...don't want her to ever get any owies from them at all..I hate shocks!

[EnviroBecca]

Rather than slapping, take a firm grip on the hand that is reaching for the outlet and move it away. This sends a clearer message than slapping and is not violent. Also say something like, "No fingers in the outlet." (I prefer that kind of message to something like, "Not for baby." which sounds like grownups can stick their fingers in the outlet as much as they want; not only is that not true, but it carries a connotation of unfair privelege. The distinction MAY be lost on a toddler, but they do understand more than they can say....)

My dad told me that when I figured out how to remove the outlet protectors, he sat me down for a lesson in how to use outlets. We talked about how ONLY plugs go into outlets, never anything else, and about how we hold the plug by the plastic part and don't touch the metal. Apparently that worked pretty well.

There's a great passage about teaching a toddler to use plugs safely, similar to the above, in the wonderful book How Children Learn by John Holt.

[maya44]

[QUOTE=EnviroBecca]Rather than slapping, take a firm grip on the hand that is reaching for the outlet and move it away. This sends a clearer message than slapping and is not violent. Also say something like, "No fingers in the outlet." (I prefer that kind of message to something like, "Not for baby." which sounds like grownups can stick their fingers in the outlet as much as they want; not only is that not true, but it carries a connotation of unfair privelege. The distinction MAY be lost on a toddler, but they do understand more than they can say....)

GREAT ADVICE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!