Family's/Friends' Responses?

[littlebeagle]

Ok, I'm finding out that not many really care when you're having baby #3. Anyone else experiencing this?

Baby #1 people were excited.
Baby #2 people were kinda excited.
Baby #3 people don't even mention it!
:

I just don't get it. I always think having a baby is exciting news.

[Mizelenius]

My sister has three children. . .three girls. She was quite horrified when people would openly talk about how she or her DH must want a boy so badly when she was PG with the 3rd, or that she was PG because she was trying for a boy. Insane. Why can't people just say "Congratulations!" and move on? (Oh, and you should hear what people say when she says she wants at least four!)

Anyway, I'M excited for you!

[littlebeagle]

Thanks! :)

Thank you for your happy dance!!
I already have a boy and a girl, but I know if I had both of the same, I'd get what your sister got! Now I just get "aNOTHer one??" or "again?"


oh well. I'm happy!!

[heyitsnaomi]

I'm so happy you started this thread so I can blow off some steam about my parents! hehe

Last night we took my parents out to dinner to share our good news, and let me tell you, it was not the reaction we were expecting! My Dad literally dropped his face into his hands when we told them! We were so disappointed.

They told us they thought we were "crazy" and it was "too soon." They felt like we should have waited until we were a little more "settled"......argh. This is a planned pregnancy for us. We feel so blessed. My DH and I just bought our first house this past Feb, we have full health insurance (as opposed to the medicaid that got us through our first time!). We are constantly talking about how great we feel we are doing, financially, emotionally, etc.

Now we are of course hesitant to see what everyone else thinks, YKWIM? Oh well, we are the ones in this boat. And we are feeling like life is pretty good!

Hope everyone else gets a better reception from their loved ones.

[gwen's mom]

I am feeling this way and we are only expecting #2! We recently moved and because my husband's family is huge and easily offended when one member hears news before another member, we decided to send cards to our family and friends with our new address and the announcement that we are expecting in Feb. We sent out 40 cards and have gotten 3 congratulatory phone calls and 2 cards. Other than that-nothing!

We have a dd and have already heard comments from virtual strangers about how we must be hoping for a boy this time. I am feeling sort of bad for this baby since no one seems to care and yet two years ago when we were pregnant people were estatic. Does it get better after they are born?

[aslmere]

I had my first REALY negative reaction tonight (and with #3 I know I will get more!)
I ran into my PCP ARNP at the grocery store and let her know the news.

BOY DID SHE TAKE IT BAD!
I think I ruined her night, she was speechless and that is RARE for her.
She just kept saying "I can't believe it!"

She told me I needed to think about a tubal after this

Like I am too stupid not to realize that actions have consequences.... happy though this one may be.

Can't wait to hear what my SIL has to say

[Mizelenius]

It's funny how people have preconceived notions about these things . . .children must be spaced X years apart and you should only have 2 children. Unless, of course, you have 2 of the same gender. You have permission to try for one of the other gender at that point. However, the third MUST be spaced X years apart. :LOL

And four . . .G-d forbid.

[Patchfire]

Crashing your thread from March...

Re: child spacing... My MIL 'gave up' on us having more kids after dd turned 3. She started hinting about us having another when dd was 15 months and I was still in college full time. Now she seems to have fully given up, so she's going to be quite surprised. (We need an *evil grin* smilie!)

[esqueue]

LB, don't let other people's reactions impact yours. If this is a joyous event for you then be happy and those who aren't happy for you can just deal with their issues. I'm 41, disabled, single and PG for the first time. I'm being cautious about who I tell because it's still early, but everyone who knows thus far has been very encouraging. They're all family or good friends who want me to be happy. I've got a lot stacked against me but I'm cautiously thrilled and no one else's reaction is going to change that (that's the joy of getting older, you cease to give much of a rip about what other people think). When I told a good friend of mine that I was planning to get PG I told her that she probably thought I was crazy. She replied that bringing a baby into the world is a blessing and she is always supportive of it (she's a retired schoolteacher) and has been great throughout it all.

There's only one couple who I'm not very thrilled for when I found out they were expecting again. Did the math, she got pregnant within 2 weeks of delivering the last one. That's an awful lot of stress on her body, and she's a wee little thing, good thing she's young. So I'm worried about her health (and her husband is a bit of a weasel, he bred 2 of their dogs so the poor girl will have puppies to deal with as well as an infant while pregnant), that's the only reason I'm not happy for them.

[littlebeagle]

I'm not letting their reactions change the joy I have, I just thought it was a bit rude for people to react that way! : I was wondering how common that was for people to react that way and if others were getting the same as me. (i just went to the restroom and returned to find my 1yr old at my laptop; she put all those smilies. :LOL)

Anyhoo, as i was saying... I'm not letting it affect me. I was just more like <shrug>"I thought having a baby was always exciting news!" (when you're old enough to be having babies, that is) Oh well, I'm excited.

I'm glad you have people who are supportive.

[saharasky]

The only 100% positive reaction we've received was from my sister and IL's ... both my brothers wondered 'what I was going to do about it?' (huh? this WAS planned guys!) ..my dad gave me a 'oh no ...i mean oh yay! ' ...and my mom told me point blank it was a bad idea and that she told me months ago I shouldn't get pg.

ultimately it's nobodies biz but my dp and I ... so they can all go ..... ..........!

I'm thrilled to be PG and won't let their negativity get me down.

[seren]

We haven't told anybody yet. At least not IRL. They weren't real excited when I announced was pregnant in June. I had a miscarriage 7 weeks ago and I know people are going to give me a lot of crap. This wasn't planned. In fact, I didn't let dh near me without a condom, so the chances of it happening were so slim. I feel it is an act of God and we are so happy. A bit nervous I will admit, but happy. Dh was going to tell his mom today. She reacts badly to EVERYTHING. Although, last time she was happy, but doubt she will be this time. Oh, well.

[mommymarliah]

butting in (my guy was born in May) he was #3 for us too, my MIL's response "again??? I guess we know what you guys like to do" sheesh.....some people, really my mom and sis were the only excited ones, but now that he's here everyone love him....

[MyCalling]

We actually got the "Are you Mormon?" question this time when we told an acquaintance. I guess 3 or 4 kids is too many for most to understand actually wanting!

My mom's response, "good, you're having twins and I hope they are both girls so you will stop." We have two boys already, so girls should in some way make us complete. :

Jessi

[seren]

Originally Posted by MyCalling

We actually got the "Are you Mormon?" question this time when we told an acquaintance. I guess 3 or 4 kids is too many for most to understand actually wanting!


Jessi

We get this a lot, kinda. We are Mormon, so we hear a lot of, *Oh, there are the Mormons pregnant again.* It actually started with ds and he was only our second. Who knows what they'll say by the time we have our 6th.