weight loss support thread

[youngnhappymamma]

Let's support each other!! I am finally serious about getting healthy, but I can't do it alone!!! I have major emotional ties to food (eat when you're happy, eat when you're sad, eat when it's cold, eat when it's hot, etc, etc) and want to be able to post how I will do at dealing with this and dealing with making myself excercise. I read through the "vetran's of the fat war's" post and read that some of you would like this support also.

So first, my body/eating/health history/bio: (long!)
My mom has been about 70 pounds + overweight for my whole life (although she has learned a whole lot about healthy living and has become much healthier, etc, but also struggles with emotional eating) I struggled with being "chubby" almost my whole adolecents (I was never really "fat" per se, maybe 10 pounds over weight or so at times, but have a body type where my legs are muscular, thus bigger than all my twig friends were) Then when I was 16 I was sick of the extra 10 pounds and lost about 15 or 20 (maybe more) by only eating about 800 calories a day (yes, I fainted a few times) and running after school every day. I lost the weight, felt awesome about it and continued to eat healthily, but a more normal calorie intake. I was about 125 pounds. I got married at 19, pregnant right away (planned) and began eating lots and lots (once the morning sickness went away) for many different reasons. I gained 55 pounds with that pregnancy. Lost 25 right away after he was born, then quickly put 15 back on. Joined the YMCA and worked out regularly for about 5 or 6 months, only lost about 5 or 6 pounds but felt and looked healthier. Stopped working out, got pregnant, sort of started working out, lost about 15 pounds in the first trimester, only gained about 20 or 25 the whole pregnancy. Lost the usual 15 or 20 right after he wa born, then gained about 15 back ...again! Didn't really excercise much, got pregnant again (at 23 years) and gained about 35 pounds with this pregnancy. (and have now gained back the usual (for me) 15 pounds or so after she was born) So, that brings me up to about 195 pounds or so at 5'4". My dh has also gained about 40 pounds since we married. We have the same poor eating habits (junk food is our solice). And I really hate cooking, so that is a toughy.

If you would like to join the support group, please post your bio below and continue to post when you need support, encouragement, have questions, or feel really happy about your accomplishments!

When I click the "post new thread now" button I will be committing myself to change!!! Scary!! But I think I can do it.....

[asherah]

OK I'll join.
I gained about 20-lbs in my 30's.. got pregnant and 39 and put on 35-lbs. I've lost 25 of the pregnancy lbs.. so I have another 30-lbs to get back to my healthiest normal weight. Assuming I can actually do that at 40.

I started Weight Watchers this week... it seems safe and sensible for a nursing mom.

My self-image is awful right now, made worse by post-partum depression. And by my huge nursing boobs, which are keeping me out of most of my pre-pregnancy shirts. I am avoiding sex with DH because I don't like him to see me or touch me when I am like this. He tells me I am beautiful but I don't feel that way with the boobs and the slack belly and the stretch marks and the 3o extra pounds.

I think the Weight Watchers will help, but I know I need to exercise to really make a difference. And it is so hard to find time to do that working part time and taking care of 11-week old ds.

I guess my question would be.. how do I feel good about myself while I am trying to lose the weight? I don't want to weight until I lose it.. cause what if that never happens? I need to try to feel good now.. AND keep trying to lose the weight.

[Christi]

My DH and I were just talking about this.

I have been heavy my whole life. I'm 5'5" and 185 pounds. A lot of emotional eating going on. When I was 19 I started meditating regularly. I had a lot of energy so I started working out. I lost about 45 pounds. Then I met dh and became very comfortable. I stopped exercising and gained about 10 pounds. We got engaged. I got pregnant. We were married. Five days later we had an ultrasound and found out that the baby had died. I immediatily dove into all junk food for consalace. I balloned up to 190. Then eight months later I was preg with ds. I lost all of my pregnancy weight but none of the extra. I haven't been meditating or exercising. I have no muscles. And my back hurts consistantly . Dh and I just made a pact. I will cut way back on the sugar intake and he will start meditating with me. We have been taking turns going to the gym very early in the mornings. I swim about 7 laps adn I'm done. I used to swim a mile a day (32 laps) I'm very motivated right now. Did anyone see Oprah Thursday? She had a lot of success stories. It was helpful. There was an 85 year old woman who works out everyday. She didn't start exercising until she was 42. It's never too late to start.

[youngnhappymamma]

Welcome asherah and christi! :)

I am sitting here eating oreo's!! So they are reduced fat, but still. See, whenever we buy junk food I feel obligated to hurry and finish eating it so that the junk food will be out of the house so that we can get healthy. Of course we only go a few days before we have more junk food, so you can see this is a vicious cycle!! I also have developed the very, very bad habit of feeling like I have to be eating whenver I am not busy cleaning or holdiing kids, etc....like while reading or watching tv. I think I am going to only allow myself to snack on healthy foods (like carrot sticks, etc)...that should curb my habit! We are also starting ot mall walk in the mornings. That's fun....good motivation to get to be in air conditioning and to see all those skinny models (most of the time just makes me mad that our society has such slanted views of what is sexy, etc......whole other topic....).
asherah...I don't know what developing a good self image would look like for you. It's weird, but when I was thin and cute I had a HORRID self image and always thought of myself as fat, etc. Then when I was ACTUALLY fat (after ds #1 was born) I felt so awesome about my body. So I have a much healthier self image than I did when I was thin. It's slipping now, though...after 3 pregnancies and not getting in shape between, my love handles and saddle bags make me gag!! And I am having intamacy issues...but like your dh, my dh seems to genuinly not mind my extreme gooshyness! But I still feel pretty postive about myself. Good luck in that journey. I hope you can find the info and suport you need to feel good about yourself! Now that I think about it, I think for me a lot of it is being/feeling defiant. Like I feel defiant of our society saying I have to look a certain way to be happy or be sexy, so in being defiant I make myself feel awesome about myself, regardless of how cute or pretty the girl walking next to me is. Does that make sense?
I didn't see Oprah, but I love seeing shows like that....how people changed and became healthy, etc. It makes it feel more do-able!

[Moukii]

I ganied 40 lbs on birth control before my 1st was born. When I got pregnant I cut out wheat, and cow dairy (except in chocolate) I immediately shead off lots of weight. I never 'dieted' before I love food too much - I'm Taurus after all. And I'm a definate chocoholic through and through.

Since my 1st child's birth two+ years ago I've lost 45-50 lbs. I feel amazing. I'm still not at my goal...but that's ok. I did solely by cutting out food I was allergic/sensitive too. I eat spelt and goat dairy which are fine.

My advise is always get checked for what you're allergic too. If your eating foods that don't agree with your body then it's harder for your body to process them thus they end up on your hips. (That doesn't explain it very well - sorry).

Good luck, it feels great when you reach your goals.

[youngnhappymamma]

moukii- what are some food allergy symptoms?

[asherah]

I've recently cut out caffeine and dairy.. caffeine because of the post-partum depression.. rules out chocolate, which I also love.

Dairy cause ds seems sensitive to it. I am still eating yoghurt and goat cheese. I wonder if it will help with the weight thing? I have always been a cheese freak.. though I dunno if I am allergic to it.

I am going to have to start walking more.. it is so hot here in Atlanta and the air is so awful, I don't like taking ds out in it. Maybe we will try the mall walking thing until it gets nicer outside.

I'd like to swim, too. I have to work harder to find time to get to the "Y".. I hate that I am paying for a membership and not using it.

Meditating. I need to do that too. DH wants to as well, maybe after ds goes to sleep? When do you meditate?

[Christi]

We wake up around 5:30 and meditate then for 20 min. Ds is usually still asleep until about 6:30 or 7. After were are done either dh or I go to the gym. Then we have breakfast as a family. Dh isn't working right now. He is in grad school. And he took the summer off. we are remodeling our house. So he is working on that

[maddysmommy]

Hey I'd love to share my struggle with you! I'm 5 ft 200 lbs (it kinda hurts to type that!) I'm only about 10 lb more than I was pre-pregnancy - dd is 9 mos old now. I think at my thinnest I was about 125, which seemed good to me, although I was doing a lot of drugs and eating very rarely - also smoking heavily. That was about 8 years ago tho and I have slowly gained weight as I went through college and got more sedintary jobs. I also HATE to exercise. I often feel sick afterwards. I'm currently seeing a naturopath to see if I can deal with food allergies and hormonal issues. I'm still breastfeeding, so I don't want to cut calories too far, but exercise and better food choices are really important to me. It seems like I can do the right things while I'm feeling good, but if I have a bad day or I don't get enough sleep I feel like at least food still feels good... So good luck everyone - I give all of us so much credit for trying, and reaching out to each other! It seems so hard, and not fair, but I know that in the long run the hard thing is being unhappy with who we are and not taking charge of our bodies and our lives.

So what is everyone doing today?

And in response to the self image issue - I found that dressing well, having a nice haircut and being proud of all of the good things about my body (ie skin, eyes whatever) really helps me. Also looking at my daughter I know that if my body made her, it must be fantastic!

Best wishes,
Leah

[youngnhappymamma]

Welcome maddysmom!! :)

asherah...we lived in Marietta last summer with dh's parents. Before we moved there I had decided it was going to be the summer that I got in shape and I was really committed, then we got there and it was soooooooo hot and repressive!!! AGH!! That is actually where we started mall walking. We ended up not doing very regularly, though.
We went to the park this morning where I got together with some MDC friends. It was fun. They are both thin but we still talked about how our bodies had changed, etc. They both have positive body images, though and didin't complain really about how their post-baby bodies differed from pre-baby, which was refreshing. there are so many thin moms out there who just complain tons about how their bodies don't look the same, etc. And it's a valid feeling for them, I don't mean to invalidate it, but it's just tough being a person who is obviously over-weight sitting next to mom's who are obviously normal weights and hear them complain. Anyway........that wasn't my point... ......we didn't mall walk today. Oh well....being at the park was nice. Maybe tonight while dh is at work I will use my little step thing (you know...a block thing you step up on and then down, etc...) and do some calastenics........

[Moukii]

Sensitivies come out all sorts of ways.

-gas
-bloating, and other digestive problems
-skin problems (acne, dry skin, rashes, eczema, rosacea, etc...)
-headaches
-red face when you eat something
-tingling feeling in your mouth
-general sluggish feeling after eating something
- there are lots

It's best to get tested. I had my son tested before he ever ate anything. That way I also knew if he was sensitive to nuts, eggs, milk, etc... The common allergy things. Other coomon allergies are: acidic things like oranges, tomatos, dairy products, wheat, sugar, and caffine to name a few.

But cutting out the wheat and dairy were the two that really helped me. And it's pretty simple. For anything that required wheat, I would subsititute 1 for 1 spelt. And cow dairy 1 for 1 with goat dairy or soya.

I like exercising but must admit I'm terrible at actually doing it. I'm too busy with two young kids, and running my own company and helping DH with his. I just literally don't have time to exercise other than riding my bike to the park, and chasing my son around everywhere.

[youngnhappymamma]

pardon my ignorance in this area, but how do you get tested? And do you usually have to pay for it out of pocket?


christi- that is so cool that you meditate!! I bet that makes a huge difference in your life. I think one of the first steps I need to make in becoming more healthy is to take time every day to kneel and pray and ponder (basically like meditating). I really just need to center myself so that I can not be so frantic about my life. So that I will develop the true desire to become healthy and have the emotional and mental strength to help myself develop the physical strength! So that is my main goal for this week: to pray and ponder every day, center myself, and be gentle with myself and my life. (and throw some simple physical activity into the mix...maybe yoga with the kids one day, mall walking the next, etc.) Feels good!

[asherah]

I am going to try to meditate in the evenings before I go to bed, but after ds has gone down.

Maybe I could get away to swim just twice a week.
And I'm going to try the mall-walking thing.. though I am worried I will want to shop!

I still like to dress well, even though I am overweight. Fat. There, I said it. I wear nice clothes and I do keep my hair and makeup nice.. but it doesn't really seem to help cause when I look in the mirror all I see is my body.

Somehow I think I won't lose weight and keep it off until I learn to appreciate myself as I am first. KWIM?

[youngnhappymamma]

We mall walked this morning!! (of course afterwards we went out to eat.......) Asherah....the malls open at about 7am to let people mall walk...so you don't have to be there when the stores are open!! And it's super cool to be there in the nice, cool mall wiht other regular mall walkers (mostly older couples)...it's just a really neat, supportive environemnt....as opposed to the mall when the stores are open!! It is hard for me when we're at the mall and the stores are open...especially when See's Candy is open!! ARGH!!

[gossamer]

I just went shopping today and decided to only buy healthy, low carb foods. I am hypoglycemic and my husband is diabetic. I am 5'2" and I weigh 270. OH MY GOD! I have never told anyone or written that down before. I need to lose at least 80 pounds before we get pregnant.
I was never a heavy child or teen. I actually flirted with anorexia for a year or so. I then got married to a verbally abusive man and I gained 60 lbs in three years of marriage. I left him and wound up in the hospital on the psych ward. Due to medications, I have gained another 30 or 40 lbs. It is time for me to lose the weight now and start our family. Pray for me. I will be praying for all of you and thinking weight loss thoughts for you all.

[skylarsmama]

Finally!!

I'm glad someone else started a weight lo9ss group. I tried a few months back to start a yahoo group and it failed miserably. Anyways, I don't post here much but I would love the support of my mothering friends. Here's a little background on me.
I'm 20 with a son who just turned 1 on July 12th!! When I got pregnant I was about 115-120. I was about 155-160 when he was born at 32weeks. In the past year I went up to 170. Mind you I'm only like 5'3"or so. It has been a huge blow to my confidence. I've already lost 5 pounds in the past week or two so I'm down to 165 !! My goal is to get down to at least 125-130 by the end of the year. (Yeah, I'm a slacker and I expect to take a while to get really motivated...lol) I miss wearing my favorite clothes Soo, I really look forward to being a part of the support group. Much love to you all
-Lindsey

[Moukii]

For food testing, some alternative doctors do it. you can go to Naturopaths, some homeopaths, most holistic practitioners.

[Christi]

Hi everyone. How is everything going? Today I went swimming. I swam a total of 8 laps. Thats one more then last time. I have been feeling pretty good. I've been eating a lot of fruits and veggies, instead of chips. One thing that I'm doing is making sure everything is fresh. I don't worry about fat intake so much. As long as the fat is a healthy fat. Not hydroginated oils. Butter and extra virgin olive oil are awesome. I went shopping yesterday. It was hard not to buy chocolate Newman-O's. I didn't buy it though!
I love meditating in the mornings. It is so refreshing. Let me just say that it has changed my life. I see the world completely differently. Have any of you heard of TM? Trancendental Meditation? This is what I practice. I have so much more energy when I do it regularly.

Hope all is well

[maddysmommy]

It's good to hear everyone doing well. What are everyone's biggest challenges? Is anyone reading any good motivational/lifestyle books?

My biggest challenges: exercising and lack of sleep - I really haven't figured out how to overcome these.

I'm currently reading Weil's Eating Well for Optimum Health. Best advice so far - reduce white flour and sugar!

Send some exercise vibes my way! Have a great day!

[youngnhappymamma]

welcome gossamer and skylarsmom!!!! :)

gossamer- I'm so happy you feel safe enough here to share with us! And I too have spent some time in a phyc ward, when I was a teenager. I was severly depressed, but never went on meds. It was not fun.
skylar's mom- I too miss all my favorite clothes!!! I still have a tub of clothes stored away, waiting for the day that I fit in them again!! It's been almost 4 years.......but I WILL fit into them again!!!
Christi it sounds like you are making some great changes!!! I really want to change our eating habits...more fruits and veggies, etc....it's sort of hard though since my older son will NOT eat veggies at all, and only eat fruit if it's in smoothy form. So my dh makes smoothies almost every day. But I'm sure if the only snacks we had aroudn the house were fruits and veggies, he'd eventually come around. I just need to go ahead and take the plunge!! The kids and I are majorly into carb snacks (crackers, cereal, etc.....), so it's probably going to be a long transition!
My biggest challenges are fighting fatigue and motivating myself. And I guess also that I eat junk food when I'm depressed/frustrated, etc.
I'll write more later....dd needs to nurse!!