Montessori vs. homeschooling - Page 2

[kel]

Whoa! Sorry about the crazy looking post!!!

Nevermind, I fixed it! -Kelly

[amsvensk]

Kelly--not to be rude either, but for some people the homeschooling does have to end or be delayed due to family circumstances. Like me, I would have rather kept my boys home this past year, but I had to work, and thus for our family Montessori was a good alternative to what we really wanted to be doing. Sometimes things aren't exactly as we want them when we want them. That is why I wrote it was timely for me and maybe it is timely for others who are trying to decide between hs and Montessori. I hope those of you who already hs will also give those of us who are new or trying to get there support as well. If someone sounds doubtful, give us your best advice or salespitch!! I feel sold on hs already but am interested in all others' experiences.

And for us there will be an "end" as homeschooling after age 7 is illegal in Sweden except for extreme cases.

[kel]

amsvensk-

I'm not saying that everyone homeschools forever - what I am saying is that for many, many people homeschooling, and especially unschooling, is a life choice - completely seperate from school. It just seems that a lot of people who DON'T homeschool assume that it is something that is done for a while when the kids are young, that it's a temporary thing. But for most anyone who is home/unschooling because they *just don't believe in compulsory schooling* it is far from temporary. I just don't like the assumption that I'm going to "grow out of this crazy phase" or something. That may not be what Mommy22 meant, but I have come across that from a lot of non-homeschoolers.

I think that certain aspects of Montessori are great, and I agree that its wonderful that it's available for people who don't want to homeschool, or who can't as in your case. I'm not attacking you. I'm sure there are homeschoolers here who use Montessori methods in their curriculum, or whose kids have been to Montessori schools before, or perhaps will in the future. I was just pointing out that this is a homeschooling board, and that I feel it should be a place of support for homeschooling - not a place where homeschoolers constantly have to defend homeschooling to people who don't believe in it. If a homeschooler at some point puts their child into a Montessori program for whatever reason, thats what the alternative education boards are for - so they can get information about Montessori, Waldorf, charter schools, etc. That's just my opinion.

I don't think there's anything wrong with discussing the differences btwn. Montessori and homeschooling, its just the whole - tell me exactly how homeschooling is better - that I feel is unneccessary.

Kelly

[mommy22]

I almost regret posting a thread here. I really was just curious about the differences, trying to get a little education for myself, and the replys have been quite hostile.

I am not downing homeschool, I think it's GREAT. I just really wanted to know what the differences were. Thanks to some of the nicer reply's, I now have a much better understanding.

I understand that hs does not always 'end'. I simply know that there are times where life throws a curve, and sometimes we SAHM have to go back to work.

I can now also see how hs is indeed a lifestyle. I had never thought of it that way before.

Thanks to those of you that enlightened me, and exuse me to those who think I am in the wrong post. Since I had a legit hs question, I assumed this would be the place to post it.

I think I will stay in the alternative ed section, and other sections where the conversation is definetly much more pleasant.

[kel]

Mommy22 -

I'll respond once more and then leave it at that. I honestly was not trying to sound rude, I think the debate between homeschooling and school schooling is just one of those topics that people are very touchy about - on BOTH "sides". I don't know if I am the sole person you felt was being hostile or not.

The thing is, as homeschoolers, like anyone else who is not in the mainstream, many of us are constantly asked to defend our decision, or it is assumed that it's a temporary choice, or that our kids really want to go to school and we're making them stay home because of our own bad PS experiences, etc. etc. I just feel like the homeschooling boards here shouldn't be yet another place where we have to defend ourselves - which is what I felt like your posts were asking for more or less. Was I wrong? If so I apologize for any hard feelings.

Kelly

[SagMom]

It's funny, but I've been thinking about how reserved and calm the responses on this thread have been.

I realize that one's tone on a bulletin board cannot always be heard correctly, but in all fairness, mommy22, I think people simply rose to the challenge of your initial post. You made a statement that there was no difference between Montessori and homeschooling and basically asked homeschoolers to explain why they didn't choose Montessori like you did. Even the title of your post was challenging ("vs" certainly implies battle.)

I'm surprised that the responses were not stronger.

[hydrangea]

I'd like to say that I restrained myself in earlier post. I was offended by the statement "Montessori offers EVERYTHING that attracts families to homeschooling." That is stated as a fact and not even prefaced by "I feel" or "I believe." As a matter of fact, in my opinion, Montessori offers nothing that attracts my family to homeschooling. And I don't think that I as a homeschooler would be the only one to be offended by that. What about people who consciously choose other schools other than Montessori for their children? As a matter of fact, some of what I know about Montessori's education philosophy does interest me, but it's this attitude that I have seen here and voiced in other ways by other Montessori followers, that turn me off of learning more about it. It begins to sound like a religion or a cult.

I was also offended by the statement "If they grew up stupid and uneducated, that would be my fault, too." Is this saying that homeschoolers taught by imperfect parents are going to grow up stupid and uneducated? I could forgive the "uneducated," but the "stupid" is more difficult to swallow.

I don't see anything wrong with the topic itself -- asking to clarify what homeschooling might have to offer a family who is sold on Montessori isn't wrong. However, it can be asked in a far less challenging manner.

Those were some pretty harsh statements in the original post, and I agree with Joan that it was pretty impressive how politely people responded. I think it's great, because obviously some mothers were able to learn something from the polite explanations, but that doesn't negate the tone in which the first post was written.

[edited only for typos]

[anythingelse]

Joan,
Don't you think that is because many of us have already gone through the having to explain our choice thing over and over ad nauseum IMO it is not being defensive of the choice but kind of like= enough already!
I never ever had someone I did not know come up to me and ask about how my kids like the public school??? or how I felt about it???? as much as when we started homeschooling all the kids and at times even a trip to the grocery store in the middle of the day can be like open season on hsers. KWIM??? With people just feeling free to ask stuff like ~why aren't your kids in school?
I really welcome the chance to enlighten, just as when I am nursing in public and a pregnant woman approaches me. Not that I know so much about education and child development, but to clear up misconceptions. I hope I am explaining that clearly w/o being offensive to folks.

Yes I agree momma22's initial post could be seen as not a clear ?, but she lays it out---
"But frankly, I don't really see any differences between the two other than actually going to a school vs. staying at home to learn." and says she has been reading about hsing.

I personally don't see how you could read much about homeschooling and not see some key differences immediately, but maybe SHE did not 'get' it and I think this is a great place to ask people who are hsing to clear it up.

The thing I do not understand is -----
"Montessori offers EVERYTHING that attracts families to homeschooling. " That is a general statement of opinion, not factual. And I admit makes me want to scream aloud in frustration as someone who has done both Montessori private school and homeschooled. It is a pretty bold statement and I think that she was very lucky not to get blasted for that. From that statement it is obvious she has either not really read much about homeschooling or does not clearly understand traditional Montessori teaching methods. And I think THAT is why the responses were not stronger.

[SagMom]

Originally posted by Vanna's Mom
Joan,
Don't you think that is because many of us have already gone through the having to explain our choice thing over and over ad nauseum

I'm not sure I understand what you mean--I hope it didn't sound like I was defending the tone of the "questions" as I was not--I agree with your feeling of "enough already" and with Hydrangea--I too took offense.

I also agree with you about sharing info but my response to people who ask questions about my choices varies greatly depending on if the questioner has an "I'm interested in something..." approach or if she/he is more confrontational.

I guess my observation about the replies comes from this: I've recently been told that I put people off with my bluntness and with the fierceness of some of my beliefs (imagine!) I've tried to temper that. I'm impressed by people who can pull off the whole "you can catch more flies with honey" thing. So, when I'm sitting here steaming, I'm impressed by people who can type out long, intelligent, calm, informative responses. I'm more the "How DARE you!?" type.

[anythingelse]

Sorry about that, I meant my post to contain your comment that you were suprised about the responses were not stronger. Sheesh
You know these mothering boards are very nice, I have found majority of people very respectful.
I spent this afternoon thinking about homeschooling and if people who are homeschooling should be doing more if possible to educate the general public about some of the misconceptions.
OT One of the reasons that I encourage and am happy to answer ?s about breastfeeding, is that I can see that if a mom is persuaded to try it, even for a little while, there can be a positive impact on my own children just from the environmental standpoint.
Seems like if more people understood homeschooling in general, it would be accepted more as a 'normal' choice, not the alternative choice when all else fails. And that would have a positive impact on my kids, if our extended family could see it in that kind of way portrayed in the news and events around here.