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Thoughts on stalking - Page 2

post #21 of 60
My babe was right on my lap watching me :LOL

A 5 month old in training :LOL


ETA: DH called me at the same time too. I put him on speaker phone. It couldn't have been worse timing.
post #22 of 60
That was NOT my implication. I am simply saying that I cannot spend the time stalking because I have other things that I have to do during the day, whether it is doing something with my children or scrubbing toilets. So please don't turn it into something it is not!

I'm not saying I approve or disapprove of someone being a hyena. I just get tired of seeing the massive posts after a stalking about someone trying to sell or trade something they just snagged and can't be used, or the constant requests for help stalking.

Again, these are just my feelings and I am in NO WAY being judgemental.
post #23 of 60
post #24 of 60
I stalk to help others and I stalk for myself. I also am a happy hyena. I see fun in it. I think your forgetting why a WAHM becomes a hyena, b/c her products ROCK! Who doesnt want a product that rocks??? So of course we are gonna make a mad dash to get her stuff, and why cant other people who have never tried this product try it as it may work wonderfully for their child as well. I dont think if a Momma stalks for this product shes not gonna use it. I had tons of Hyena dipes I stalked for and some I didnt use, and as hard as it was (knowing I'll never get another) I sold them just recently.

Also...Why cant one stalk for a baby yet concieved or plan ahead? Seems like a silly request.

I dunno, I just dont see the big deal. You stalk a WAHM and hope for the diaper or go to a "non-hyena" WAHM with great products and you dont stalk. Theres nothing more you can do. Its not gonna change. If a business makes good products, theyre gonna be harder to get, you cant change that.
post #25 of 60
Thread Starter 
Well, at least it's not just me having these feelings....even if we're in the minority!

I totally get the hobby thing, and kudos to you folks who CAN stalk, or buy weekly fluff, or try new diapers just to see how they are - you're the folks that really help out the WAHM's.

I guess I'm just feeling frustrated - I'm finally seeing actual pictures of lots of different types of newborn diapers on actual newborn babies, and that's been giving me definite ideas of what I am and am not looking for......and then I go to the site to see if there's any there, and there never ever is. Couple that with the whole "I know a secret to snagging everything in hyena cart" deal from the Little Lovies stocking, and it gets irksome. How can a diaper-chicken like me compete with a pack of hyenas, yk? :LOL
post #26 of 60
I think the thing that bothers me the most is the "Hey I got the size___, who wants it" posts. They are on every thread that is on high stalking alert, and usually SECONDS after the stalking has taken place. Why buy something you don't need/want.
Another issue that I think is taken WAY too lightly is the "hey can you stalk for me" where someone buys for someone else then contacts the WAHM with the details. This is very confusing when you are dealing with the "paper trail" Your order status says one name, then the paypal comes in from a different location. Keep in mind this is one order out of many.
During book keeping time, this can be a headache..
Ok, who did I actually send this to.....
I myself have been caught up in the frenzy so many times. I know the rush. I know the excitement. I also know hyena cart runs fast and there is a trick that some are keeping to themselves. Since I no longer stalk, I just watch (thats fun too). I love to see what these talented WAHMs have up for grabs (if I even get to see it :LOL)
I am not trying to be rude, mean, or hurt anyones feelings. Just giving my opinions
post #27 of 60
Quote:
Originally Posted by jmreinke
I personally don't mind the stalking/stalkers. I don't participate, and it doesn't bother me.

What does bother me is what is referred to in the quote above; quickly buying anything you can get your hands on, then deciding you don't want it - if nobody else wants it, you email the WAHM back and say "Sorry! I don't actually want it". It is rude to the WAHM. This has happened several times at the last couple of MDF stockings. It seems to me that once you "buy" and item, even if you don't complete the paypal process, you have a contract to buy - just like at eBay.

Think of it from the WAHMs perspective. We get very excited when something sells (yes, even if it is a hyena item and you pretty much know it will sell). We count on that money to pay bills. When somebody buys something quickly, then emails that they don't want it after all, or even trades before they pay - so somebody else is now responsible to pay for the original transaction - it makes more work for the WAHM, ties up stock that they could be selling to someone who does want it, and hurts feelings (the WAHMs).

I think all the hynea frenzy is crazy, but I DO understand it. I also understand the OP frustration and concerns. I'm not sure there is much to change it.

However, I would say this: PLEASE if you "buy" something through Hyena Cart (or anywhere else), it is your responsibility to complete the transaction and pay for it, just like if you win an auction or hit "buy it now" on eBay. There's no place for WAHMs to leave feedback for "Non-Paying Hyenas", and Non Paying Hyena-ing is happening quite a bit. That really does hurt the WAHMs business/time/income.

Even if you do have buyer's remorse, you still need to pay for your item. Then, you can put it on the TP or eBay or trade. But don't make more work for the WAHM in having to figure out who owes her money for the purchase.
I totally agree! Changing an order (to a different momma) is more work for the WAHM, it happens, it isn't a big deal if it is one or two times but if it is the same people over and over it would really get annoying yk? I mean people have to change all their records and update everything. The "oops I got caught in the hype and didn't really want that" excuse really is quite rude and even with hyena things if they have to be put back up after the official stocking sometimes they sit.

The whole stalking for others thing doesn't bother me, not does the stalking just to stalk and then offering it to whoever wants it, but your right, it does make more work for the WAHM, and well I just don't 'get' it yk? LOL (there are a lot of things I don't 'get' doesn't mean they bother me )

Also buying something you don't have the money for, or can't pay for for a while is something that does bother me. I know there are a few hyena's that will buy whatever they can buy and then go to the TP after they score to raise the money to pay for it, which can take a week or more at times. Just delaying to pay until they have the money, which is fine for the person buying the diaper but the WAHM might NEED that money when she stocks not 2 weeks later yk? Like people stock to buy school supplies, or pay for a dinner out for an anniversary or something, it is often done by WAHM's and to have people just not pay for weeks is frustrating. **This isn't to say if you clear it with the WAHM before you buy, or if she okay's it after the fact there is anything wrong with that, but you SHOULD clear it with her, I have had a number of customers do this and I have NO problem with it at all, but I have had customers just not respond to the payment e-mail, or just ignore me all together until they can come up with the money, that isn't cool.
post #28 of 60
Well there goes my success, lol. But seriously, like she said NO big deal...its not like I was screwing with the system. You just have to use ur skills.
post #29 of 60
Also, wanted to add....Do we all have to follow the same procedure at hyenacart to win..sheeesh.
post #30 of 60
its ok....I shoulda just kept my mouth shut and no one woula been bothered cause no one would have known. I know that sounds mean but its not like what I was doing was illegal or sniping.
post #31 of 60
Quote:
Originally Posted by Holli
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa... I can't take it anymore. It's not a big trick! I figured it out in 30 seconds. Lindsay may hate me but just use the Tab key, gals! That's the big giant secret! See, not so special, is it?!

I hate keeping things from other people so there it is!

Holli
I've been using the tab key the whole time with absolutely no sucess with the HC. I think my problem just stems from stressing out in the final few seconds!
post #32 of 60
Quote:
Originally Posted by Holli
I would have figured it out eventually, and I think other people already used it. I was about to go back and start experimenting with it again. You just gave me a push to do it sooner. I still think it's just one of many factors involved!

Holli
Absolutely. I figured some already knew.
post #33 of 60
Quote:
Originally Posted by mehndi mama
I guess I'm just feeling frustrated - I'm finally seeing actual pictures of lots of different types of newborn diapers on actual newborn babies, and that's been giving me definite ideas of what I am and am not looking for......and then I go to the site to see if there's any there, and there never ever is.
You may have just wanted to express your frustration on this thread, but if you want some assistance in actually finding diapers that may actually work for your newborn, why not post what I've seen many other people do?

Something titled "Help finding newborn diapers" and say something like "I have some definate ideas of what I'm looking for in a newborn diaper (explain what they are), similar to X Y Z diapers, but that are instock or a short waiting list." I think you'd be surprised how many reccs you might get. You also might post an ISO on the trading post-- sometimes mamas don't have time to list things for sale, but they might answer an ISO.

I think you can harness the hyena energy to actually work for you rather than trying to get people to stop hyena-ing.



Karla
post #34 of 60
Quote:
Originally Posted by Holli
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa... I can't take it anymore. It's not a big trick! I figured it out in 30 seconds. Lindsay may hate me but just use the Tab key, gals! That's the big giant secret! See, not so special, is it?!

I hate keeping things from other people so there it is!

Holli
: :

I figured...but I wasn't sure because I am slower using the tab key! :LOL You could whip right by the box in he excitement and then you are screwed. :LOL I tried that but it didn't work so well for me.
post #35 of 60
Hmmmm, my thoughts. Personally I find stalking very frustrating. I have stalked twice. Once for a Kiwi Pie through hyena cart. And that I didn't mind since I got there 3 minutes before the stocking, tried, and then it was done. The other time was for a "regular" stocking, and I found it so darn frustrating since no one knew exactly when the WAHM would stalk. I spent a couple hours refreshing (among other things, like taking care of my kids). I came away empty handed. It was dissappointing, frustrating, and just not for me. It's okay though, I'm perfectly happy with my non-stalked for stash. I have some good stuff too -- elbees, a fuz garden set, the most darling appliqued bbh wio, a kss, etc.

I love firefly diapers which you can just go to the site and buy. Sugarpeas side snappers are among my very favorites too and they are available several places. I so hear the frustration about stalking. I think the key (at least for me) is that if stalking isn't "fun" then just don't do it. Seek out the diapers that are just as nice, but also available.

Oh and fwiw, Holli, I think it's great you are building your stash for your daughter!! I am so with you. Whenever life seems to be out of control I think I'll revamp the diaper stah, the kids' wardrobe, or something else that I actually have control over. Sometimes focusing on the little things we can do something about makes the bigger things we have no control over seem just a little less difficult.

Just my .02.
post #36 of 60
Thread Starter 
Quote:
You may have just wanted to express your frustration on this thread, but if you want some assistance in actually finding diapers that may actually work for your newborn, why not post what I've seen many other people do?
Yeah, maybe I should have. But that was just what *spurred* the post - there's obviously other issues involved, and I'm not the only one having problems.

Never mind. I'll go back to being the invisible chicken
post #37 of 60
I don't want to get in the middle of this discussion but I would like to add that I really dislike the "secretiveness" that goes on here sometimes. We're all mamas. We're all practically in the same boat (i.e. we all want dipes for our kids) and we should all be helping each other. I remember a few months back when someone posted a thread about a stocking and the stocking was kept a secret through the entire thread. I was not so nicely told to join the Yahoo group if I wanted to know the secret. Anyway, that's the kind of pettiness I'm talking about and I don't think there's any room for it in a community like this. Why can't we all just spill our "secrets" in the name of helping each other out???

Just my .02
post #38 of 60
Quote:
Originally Posted by allformyboys
I totally agree! Changing an order (to a different momma) is more work for the WAHM, it happens, it isn't a big deal if it is one or two times but if it is the same people over and over it would really get annoying yk? I mean people have to change all their records and update everything. The "oops I got caught in the hype and didn't really want that" excuse really is quite rude and even with hyena things if they have to be put back up after the official stocking sometimes they sit.

The whole stalking for others thing doesn't bother me, not does the stalking just to stalk and then offering it to whoever wants it, but your right, it does make more work for the WAHM, and well I just don't 'get' it yk? LOL (there are a lot of things I don't 'get' doesn't mean they bother me )

Also buying something you don't have the money for, or can't pay for for a while is something that does bother me. I know there are a few hyena's that will buy whatever they can buy and then go to the TP after they score to raise the money to pay for it, which can take a week or more at times. Just delaying to pay until they have the money, which is fine for the person buying the diaper but the WAHM might NEED that money when she stocks not 2 weeks later yk? Like people stock to buy school supplies, or pay for a dinner out for an anniversary or something, it is often done by WAHM's and to have people just not pay for weeks is frustrating. **This isn't to say if you clear it with the WAHM before you buy, or if she okay's it after the fact there is anything wrong with that, but you SHOULD clear it with her, I have had a number of customers do this and I have NO problem with it at all, but I have had customers just not respond to the payment e-mail, or just ignore me all together until they can come up with the money, that isn't cool.
Amen Sistah!!


post #39 of 60
Quote:
Originally Posted by Butterflymom
Well, I personally love being a hyena (not ashamed at all! ) and I don't think it makes CDing hard for anyone. There are such great diapers available for everyone, and all the excitement over certain brands just helps the WAHM who is currently in the spotlight, and creates more fun and enthusiasm for cloth diapering in general. Like Karla says, it drives the market and helps designs improve, things not to stagnate, blah blah blah (she was way more eloquent than me, as usual).
I agree -- it is fun for me and I guess my "hobby". But the truth is that if you couldnt ever get hyena diapers you would still be able to CD very successfully. I CDed Maxi (and enjoyed it) from to birth to close to 7 or 8 months before I ever tried a WAHM diaper.

There are SOOOO many WAHMS and SOOOO many diapers and even a LOT of commercial companies making diapers that the fact that "hyena-ing" exists doesnt stop people from being able to CD or make it harder. I also totally argee with Karla that it does drive the market and it does drive the constant improving of diapers and innovation of new and better things. Laura of El Bee even says on her home page that she created El Bee diapers because she couldnt find what she was looking for in the world of CDing. So yay for her! She came up with a design that works so well and is so attractive people cant get enough of them. I dont love them because they are impossible to get (the whole "hunt factor) but because I LOVE them for what they are.

Anyhoo -- I think CDing can be practical and still be fun and if stalking isnt fun for people there are tons of other ways to get diapers.
post #40 of 60
Quote:
Originally Posted by Justthebasics
And please don't take this the wrong way but it bewilders me the time and energy that some will put into stalking a certain diaper or cover, which for me is time I'd rather spend with my babies, or getting something done around the house! I cannot fathom sitting in front of my computer for hours waiting to purchase a diaper, there are things so much more important for me to be doiing with my time and my children's time.
This is something else I wanted to say and forgot -- I think the reason I stalk like I do (and spend so much time on this board for that matter) is that I am at work all day - sure my boss would love to know this is what I am doing !

When I wasnt working (from before Maxi was born til about 13 months) I only got online at night when he was asleep. I bought pretty much everything from ebay at that time.

Anyway my point is that I think I am only a hyena and a stalker because I am at work and have a wicked fast computer connection! So its not that frusterating for me and I have the time. I can see how unbeliveably frusterating it would be if I were at home with dial up -- I would probably never even bother to stalk.

ETA -- this is not to say that SAHMs who are online during the day and do have time to stalk are neglecting their babies. I just never could do it when home with Maxi because most of that time I was alone with him (as DH was gone during the baseball season) which meant that any time he was not awake was the only time I had to do stuff for myself -- like shower and eat . When he was away there was no way he would let me be online -- he is would either destroy our house or himself if he didnt have my undivided attention. But that is just MY situation - I am sure there are lots of calmer babies in the world that will actually play by themselves for a while!
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