?? for those who have more than 2.........

[Desdamona]

So this is baby #4 for us. And I find myself not wanting to tell any of our family. My homebirth support group ladies know, and a few friends but I cann't bear to think of what insensitive comments HIS family will make once they know. My SIL told me that I should schedule a c/sect and have my tubes tied while I'm at it... And she thought she wans't being rude... while I was 5m pg with Gabriel. Thankfully the majority of our families live out of state so I don't have to deal with them on a regular basis.

My question is for ladies that find themselves with less than supportive families friends, what are you thinking about sharing the news? I am thinking that waiting until there is no more denying it will work the best......... like when the baby is crowning??!! :LOL Also it seems like the more children we have the less happy the families are with us... Whats up with that??!

[_jenn]

with the baby that i miscarried i told family and it was a unanimus "ohhhhhhhhh. can you afford it?" "aww, and you just bought a 2 bdrm apt, where will the baby go??" (we cosleep) and "you're going to be so tired"

how about a nice "congradulations" or "i cant wait to meet him/her" would that have really killed them?!

now, with my new pg, ppl are more sensitive, b/c of the miscarriage, but i get the "isnt it too soon" and "you shoulda waited longer"

and these are the grandparents! however, my mother says that in the end she'll of course love him/her....blah blah blah

my mil and fil think we are poor unorganized trash, so they pity and humor me more than anything. they are great ppl and all....just not the same as me. they'd rather i picked a carreer other than mother, and support their son better, instead of obviosly mooching off of him. oh well!!!

my sil is 4 mos. pg and my sister is getting married, so my pg is not big news around here. (thats ok. dh and i are extatic!)

(only mom, dad and mil and 2 friends know of the new pg so far)

[wende]

This is number 5 for us and I got the "I think that it's unfair to your other kids to keep having kids", "don't you know what causes that?", hysterical uncontrollable laughing, "why would you want so many kids?", "how can you afford it?", "I wish I could be happy for you", etc. Amazingly enough, the one person (my mil) that I thought would be least supportive is the most excited.

[JillyKay]

I am SO not looking forward to telling my family and my ILs!
I already now my family will be blatantly upset. And the ILs will do their passive agressive stuff. Ugh.
We are planning to wait until Thanksgiving to tell anyone ('cept my sis, she already knows and is happy for us) unless i am obviously showing before then.
Oh well, they'll come around. They did last time, lol!

[Desdamona]

Originally Posted by wende

This is number 5 for us and I got the "I think that it's unfair to your other kids to keep having kids", "don't you know what causes that?", hysterical uncontrollable laughing, "why would you want so many kids?", "how can you afford it?", "I wish I could be happy for you", etc. Amazingly enough, the one person (my mil) that I thought would be least supportive is the most excited.

This is the same situation I am in, Wendy!! My MIL probably will be the happiest since she had 5 children. And my DH's siblings all have one child each. She told me once that her kids were stingy (SP?) with giving her grandkids. lol She loved that I finally tipped the scales and her grandkids outnumber the number of children she had. Plus she's a little senile, 78yrs young, and I think she would be happy for us if we told her that we were buying a circus and putting the boys on the high wire act. God love her!

My mother is going to be the most negative of all, I think. DH and I have had our normal up's and down's in our relationship. But all she remebers is the downs. Plus she has never really liked DH ever since we started dating 12 years ago.

[robugmum]

My mil is one of those types who sincerely believes that no one in their right mind would ever consider having more than 2 kids. She actually told my bil that the world is only designed for families of four, she used chairlifts as an example! Personally, I've seen many 6 person chairlifts! I'm not looking forward to telling her about this baby but I think everyone else will be happy. Worried about my health, maybe, but happy. What's funny is that I know that my bil and sil are also ttc so that will be grandchildren #s 5 and 6 for mil.