I'm posting this here, because I figure people know where I'm coming from, from a homeschooling perspective. We're taking an unschooling approach, at least in the preschool years. I do take my son to a Gymboree art "class", simply because he likes it. I don't want him to be taught how to do art. He just likes the atmosphere and the projects.
The "teacher" of this class is friends with my dh; her dh and my dh work for the same company. Her son, who is also in the class, is a few months older than my ds. She's nice and friendly to my son.
There's a period of free painting and then we do group crafts. The class is Ok, but it's so mainstream and pushes the idea of "working with" our kids. I'm not really one to "work with". We play and read, but I don't directly teach him. The other day, when we painted at home, we saw that red and blue make purple, but I would never try to get him to memorize that and I wouldn't do a "color of the day" or anything. I don't believe in initiating early reading or writing or stuff like that. Again, we have an unschooling approach right now: life is learning and that's it. We're super laid-back in the class. I just let him do his thing.
So, one day in class, the teacher is telling us that it's good to work with our kids to teach them what their names look like. My son writes his own name, but I never say anything about it in class; Some of the other parents, OTOH, talk loudly, "VERY GOOD, Suzy!!! That IS an S!" We are just quiet and keep to ourselves.
So, last week, when the teacher saw my son writing his name, she said, "Oh, Ben's Mommy did him a favor by giving him a name with only three letters!" I didn't say anything, but it struck me as an unnecessary thing to say. Last night, as she was handing out the paper, just as Ben started writing his name, she said *to the class*, "Ben has it easy, because he only has three letters in his name", and then the other parents chuckled. Again, I just smiled and ignored her.
I want to know if I'm being too sensitive, because I can tell you that it really ticked me off. First of all, I'm already not overly happy about the structure, the whole "show and tell", where we go around the room in free time and tell the class what each kid painted. I just think the kids should paint and not have to show it off. She makes comments then, but they're generally nice ones. Still, it makes me nervous that it will change the way ds thinks, which is he doesn't think about this stuff at all; he just draws and writes for love of it, not for attention. She made a huge deal out of him painting inside the lines, she has asked me if I've helped him before. I feel like there's a weird pressure, like the parents are checking the other kids out. But on top of that, I feel like it's wrong to convey to a small child that he is doing something, "easy". It's not easy to write your name, especially when you have taught yourself how to do it. I feel like it takes away from his accomplishment and work to tell him that others think he has it "easy". I dont' want him to get preconceived notions of "easy" and "hard" and a sense of comparison. I thought we could largely avoid that with homeschooling, YK?
Am I being too sensitive? If you would be irked too, what would you do or say? Right now, I just smile and ignore the comment. I'm not sure of what to do.
The "teacher" of this class is friends with my dh; her dh and my dh work for the same company. Her son, who is also in the class, is a few months older than my ds. She's nice and friendly to my son.
There's a period of free painting and then we do group crafts. The class is Ok, but it's so mainstream and pushes the idea of "working with" our kids. I'm not really one to "work with". We play and read, but I don't directly teach him. The other day, when we painted at home, we saw that red and blue make purple, but I would never try to get him to memorize that and I wouldn't do a "color of the day" or anything. I don't believe in initiating early reading or writing or stuff like that. Again, we have an unschooling approach right now: life is learning and that's it. We're super laid-back in the class. I just let him do his thing.
So, one day in class, the teacher is telling us that it's good to work with our kids to teach them what their names look like. My son writes his own name, but I never say anything about it in class; Some of the other parents, OTOH, talk loudly, "VERY GOOD, Suzy!!! That IS an S!" We are just quiet and keep to ourselves.
So, last week, when the teacher saw my son writing his name, she said, "Oh, Ben's Mommy did him a favor by giving him a name with only three letters!" I didn't say anything, but it struck me as an unnecessary thing to say. Last night, as she was handing out the paper, just as Ben started writing his name, she said *to the class*, "Ben has it easy, because he only has three letters in his name", and then the other parents chuckled. Again, I just smiled and ignored her.
I want to know if I'm being too sensitive, because I can tell you that it really ticked me off. First of all, I'm already not overly happy about the structure, the whole "show and tell", where we go around the room in free time and tell the class what each kid painted. I just think the kids should paint and not have to show it off. She makes comments then, but they're generally nice ones. Still, it makes me nervous that it will change the way ds thinks, which is he doesn't think about this stuff at all; he just draws and writes for love of it, not for attention. She made a huge deal out of him painting inside the lines, she has asked me if I've helped him before. I feel like there's a weird pressure, like the parents are checking the other kids out. But on top of that, I feel like it's wrong to convey to a small child that he is doing something, "easy". It's not easy to write your name, especially when you have taught yourself how to do it. I feel like it takes away from his accomplishment and work to tell him that others think he has it "easy". I dont' want him to get preconceived notions of "easy" and "hard" and a sense of comparison. I thought we could largely avoid that with homeschooling, YK?
Am I being too sensitive? If you would be irked too, what would you do or say? Right now, I just smile and ignore the comment. I'm not sure of what to do.
You sound normal to me. It is amazing to me how many people want to "teach" colors and shapes...I guess for us that kind of learning just takes place throughout the course of the day.
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