One last thread before we move on to "Life with a Babe"? 10/9 - 10/16 - Page 2

[HeatherB]

Originally Posted by blueviolet

You can get the Decent Exposures nursing bra with velcro: http://www.decentexposures.com/bra.shtml

How cool! Have you (or anyone else) tried these? How are they? They look really interesting - the velcro option, lots of sizes, various fabrics, and they come in my size! I currently have one decent nursing bra so I think it might be a good investment. :LOL

[JenInMpls]

oh my, please tell me that this gets better.

I am so f*ing (fill in your own *) sick of feeding Tristan with this SNS. Granted I'm happy to be feeding him breast milk again now instead of formula, but we both get so frustrated with the SNS. His latch on the right side has gone completely down the drain, hopefully some cranio-sacral work at the chiropractor on Tuesday will help that... but when nighttime comes, I'm tired, he's fussy, my back hurts, I have a rash on my nipples and breasts from the adhesive on the tape to hold the tubes on... I just can't take it and I hit this downward spiral. I can't feed my baby. I couldn't even bring my baby into the world. If I had had him before medical technology and intervention I probably would have died and so would have he. If we both would have lived and no one would have been there to save our butts with spare milk, he'd die of starvation. And I lose faith in myself and my body and wonder just what the hell I'm doing, since obviously I was not meant to be a mother.

Of course if you look at the clock you know that it's probably tiredness talking. It's been a busy day but I got 2.5 hours by myself today. I did as you did, Steph, cranked the tunes and I opened the sunroof and the window and sang loudly to my German camp CD. My mom and Bob came over this evening, she brought a roast for dinner which was quite good.

I know, I shouldn't beat myself up, I'll be a great mother, i'm still adjusting and so is tristan, but I can't figure out what constructive lesson all of these setbacks are trying to teach me. Anyone see a hidden purpose in all of these difficulties?

I'm going to bed.

sigh, j

[plantmommy]

Oh, Jen!!!

You are being an UNBELIEVABLE mother! Tristan is so lucky to have a mom so persistant in getting him the good stuff. I am in awe of everything you are doing, how well you are persevering. You are just an amazing person.

I know it's hard to see the good in this now, but someday you will, I'm sure. My first child taught me more than I could write, but the learning process was a struggle. Nevertheless I am a better parent and a better person for having mothered that baby.

[chrissy]

oh jen, you were definitely meant to be a mother!! you are working so hard to give tristan the very best of everything and you are doing an awesome job. i have no idea what you are meant to learn from this, but i do know that one day these struggles will be over. and it will happen sooner than you think. one day tristan will come home from doing an errand with jo and he'll run in the door looking for you screaming "mom!!" and when he finds you he'll throw himself into your arms and give you a big hug and a slimy little boy kiss and ALL this will have been worth it. all this that you guys are dealing with now- his birth that was so different from how you had planned, the nursing problems, the intense fatigue, the hormones, the guilt... all of it is so temporary. sending you lots of hugs and love,

[banana girl]

Originally Posted by JenInMpls

oh my, please tell me that this gets better.

when nighttime comes, I'm tired, he's fussy, my back hurts, I have a rash on my nipples and breasts from the adhesive on the tape to hold the tubes on... I just can't take it and I hit this downward spiral.
And I lose faith in myself and my body and wonder just what the hell I'm doing, since obviously I was not meant to be a mother.
Anyone see a hidden purpose in all of these difficulties?

Hang in there Jen! Yes, it does get better! really it does! I was feeling those same kinds of things about a week or 2 ago. Different specifics, but the same underlying feeling.

Please don't lose faith in yourself and in your body... you are indeed meant to be a mother, you've just had a really long hard road to travel in order to get here. It's a damn shame the birth ended up being so very difficult especially considering how much research and preparation you put into becoming a mother!

No, i don't see some hidden purpose, life just isn't fair sometimes! But maybe it is preparing you for something later in life. I know that I have grown a lot as a woman by becoming Mielle's mommy..... have patience and don't be so hard on yourself! We all believe in you, and I'm certain Tristan feels the same way. You provide him with love and tender care, you brought him into this world with courage and compassion. Now give yourself some of that compassion, you deserve it!

P.S. Good luck with the milk stimulating meds!

[sistermama]

Jen - I think you are really doing an amazing job! Tristan is gorgeous and is so lucky to have you as a mom. I promise that a month from now, you won't remember how rough it is right now. You are making all the right choices for him!

Chris - Your children are beautiful. BTW, Jack has the same spaceship pjs. Don't you love them? We got our's at Costco and are sad they don't carry that brand anymore.

Anna - Jerome looks so darling and proud in the first pic with Mielle in the sling!

My sister is in town from NC for the week to help me out and we all went to a big art fest this morning. Jack painted a gorgeous picture - I think I'm going to have it framed. The people doing to kids art stuff wouldn't let parents into the tent because of space issues, which I can understand, but told them there should be an exception for children under a certain age. When I said that, the woman had the nerve to tell me, "If you don't think he is capable of doing it on his own, he shouldn't be in here anyway." In a VERY nasty tone. Wow, really makes me want to send my child to her art classes, huh?

Now this afternoon, I'm getting my sister to watch Jack (nice, right? come to town now babysit my kid) while John and I go with Lucy to a movie. First movie since Christmastime,
woo-hoo!!!

[Mom2baldie]

Chrissy,

I know this is a late response, but I wanted to say that we wont be getting the flu shots this year. We never have and have never gotten the flu either. I dont really understand how this vaccine is supposed to provide protection, because isnt it made with the virus from the year prior? But the virus changes every year?

We dont do any vaccines, but this is one that I dont know much about... I personally get more stressed out about pertussis since there are outbreaks in my area every year.

[adventuregirl]

nak

jen, you are so obviously MEANT to be a mother!! the mystery behind our challenges may never be clear, but we only get what we can handle (even if we don't think we can). the universe works in strange ways, but tristan picked you and all the stuff that comes in that package. hang in there, i totally understand the meltdown hour and how it gets to you. being a mama is such a new and different world, and it would not have come to you if you weren't meant for it.

well, nessa is 6 weeks old as of yesterday, time has definitely taken on a different feel, the month of september has no shape in my memory. i can't believe how different she is already, and how much she'll change in the coming weeks/months. wow.

happy monday, enjoy those sweet baby faces.

[JenInMpls]

Originally Posted by Mom2baldie

I personally get more stressed out about pertussis since there are outbreaks in my area every year.

here too, whooping cough seems to be making a comeback. 2 kids at my school had it last summer.

to other co-sleeping families: what do you dress your baby in to sleep? tristan seems to absorb so much of my body heat, plus he sleeps on a puddle pad (with a cotton cloth over it) which seems to insulate him a lot. yet he snuggles up SO close. I always wake up to find him snuggled along my side, under my arm. he usually only has our sheet plus a light cotton flannel blankie over him. last night i dressed him in a onesie but he still felt so warm this morning. tips? tia.

well, one sleeping baby here, i hate it when he suckles to sleep, his mouth falls open and all that milk drips down his cheek, my arm, my shirt... swallow, little boy!!! precious, rare mama's milk! i spose i should throw some nappies at the washer while i have the chance.

j

[cottonwood]

I bundle Rowan up pretty well, but our house is cold. If he's not complaining, you're probably dressing him just right!

[cottonwood]

Heather, I haven't tried the Decent Exposures bra. I just posted it because somebody asked about velcro closures. If I have to wear a bra, I wear the Jane's Bra made by Blue Canoe. You can see me wearing it here and here.

[StacyL]

Originally Posted by JenInMpls

to other co-sleeping families: what do you dress your baby in to sleep?

We just put Alex in his diaper and me topless so we sleep skin-to-skin. I put a thin little receiving blanket underneath to catch any accidents, but that doesn't usually happen. Then I pull the sheet up over his waist. He gets sweaty really easily. He likes to snuggle close too. The way he sleeps looks different than the way he sleeps in his bassinet in the daytime - it's cuter in bed at night, like he likes it better!

[chrissy]

hi mamas,
just popping in for a quick me post. my little girl has a cold! i am a pretty anxious person usually and it's freaking me out. our whole family seems to have the same thing. i woke up last night around midnight and she felt really warm. took her temp under her arm and it was 99.7. this morning it was 100 under her arm and her nose was really stuffy. we took her in to the ped and he was great, very reassuring. listened to her lungs... and said he hears congestion only in her face/sinuses. she is still nursing really well so he said that is good. he recommended breast milk in the nose for nose drops. said to call him back if her temp gets to 101 or if she stops nursing well. man, i hope this cold is short lived because i am just so nervous about it. she's so tiny and new and i hate that she isn't feeling well.

i know some of you mamas who had your babies before me dealt with this, do you have any tips or advice? sometimes being a mama is so hard and scary.

[wardermom]

Chrissy-Arowen's cold was pretty mild. It didn't go into her lungs, thank goodness.One thing I did was put a humidifier on at night. I put some lavender and tea tree oil in it.
You could take garlic or echinacea.
Watch her more carefully if it goes to her lungs. Liam got a really bad virus when he was 2 weeks old. He had trouble breathing and we ended up in the hospital for almost a week with him having treatments with inhaled medication and he was on oxygen for a couple of days as well. Make sure to get help fast if she has trouble breathing. I don't want to scare you with this kind of talk,sorry if I am. It was a bad virus for us all, sort of like RSV although the test came back negative for that. Hopefully yours isn't like that.
I hope it stays mild and goes away fast for her sake and your peace of mind.

[chrissy]

Thanks Melanie. I will definitely watch it closely. We took a bath with some eucalyptus oil this evening and I'm going to run the vaporizer with some more tonight. Also last time we took her temp it was a little lower- 98.9.

[HeatherB]

Originally Posted by blueviolet

Heather, I haven't tried the Decent Exposures bra. I just posted it because somebody asked about velcro closures. If I have to wear a bra, I wear the Jane's Bra made by Blue Canoe. You can see me wearing it here and here.

Linda, the Jane's Bra looks a lot like one I got from a shop here in town - very comfy and super soft organic cotton! Of course, I can't find it now. Maybe if I get some laundry done! :LOL I may try out the velcro closure one, too, 'cause it sounds like such a neat idea! Though I wonder how long the velcro would hold up - but I always worry about that!

Chrissy, I'm so sorry your little one has a cold! Iain also got a cold within the first two weeks. Same kind of thing - the whole family had it. The most helpful thing for us was to clear out his nose, as he would get super stuffy and then didn't sleep or eat well. I didn't do it as often as the ped's office recommended, just whenever I thought he sounded really awful. I used saline in it, then would suck out what I could, which was sometimes quite a bit for such a little nose! I definitely like the breastmilk idea, and you could probably do that and then suction, too, if you wanted. I've heard from one doc that suctioning can actually cause more mucous as the nose gets irritated, so I would try to do it only when necessary. Oh, Iain got a gunky eye with his - your basic conjunctivitis, I guess. I tried putting breastmilk on it, but it didn't help until my midwife told me to clean and open it up first, and then put the milk on. That worked like a charm! So if her eyes get green gunk, give that a try. Hopefully it'll all pass very soon!

Jen, I dress Iain in anything from a onesie to a fleece/terry footed sleeper. For us, I prefer the weight of a cotton jersey sleeper or gown, so that if he's in his bassinet or gets uncovered, he doesn't get too cold, but also doesn't get overheated in the bed with some light covers. I agree with the PP who said if he's not complaining, he's probably fine!

Well, we've been keeping very busy. My ILs are in town today and tomorrow. This is my FIL and his wife. Thankfully they're staying at a hotel and have a rental car, 'cause just having people around is hard enough! My house is half a wreck (that is, we got a little cleaning done!), I don't have my own car 'cause it got wrecked 3 weeks ago and the body shop hasn't finished with it yet, and I'm trying to finish planning and preparing for a Welcome Baby party for Iain on Saturday.

Tomorrow I take Iain down to Texas Children's for an ultrasound of his tummy. We're checking for pylloric stenosis (hopefully spelling that right) - where the valve between the stomach and intestines closes off. He's been a spitty baby always, but has been doing more and more projectile vomitting. I called today to ask when that would become a concern, and apparently at this point it is. Pylloric stenosis tends to develop between 4 and 6 weeks of age, and Iain is at 5 weeks now. I don't really know that I think that's what's wrong, but given the timing the doctor feels it prudent to check it out. If the ultrasound is negative then we go on with the idea of bad reflux - which I had as a child and so did/does Gabriel. I'm going to have my chiropractor take a look at Iain, too, and see if she can find anything that might be contributing to it. If we don't spend the whole day at the hospital, maybe we'll see her tomorrow (ran into her at the grocery today!). Somewhere in here we have to spend time with the ILs, too...

I better not forget to pack the diaper bag up and pick out some super cute dipes for tomorrow! We should have plenty of opportunities to show them off.

[chrissy]

poor little iain! i hope everything goes well today heather.

lilah seems to be feeling much better this morning. her nose is still stuffy but her fever is gone and she is much more alert and happy. PHEW!!!!!!!!!

[MamaAcorn]

Glad Lilah is feeling better. We had a cold at our place last week, but luckily we managed to keep it isolated to only Alex, so the baby didn't get it.

Heather, good luck with the ultrasound and the doctor's appt.

We've been keeping incredibly busy with day to day stuff. DH is over his head with school and I'm pretty near there with working and taking care of the two boys while balancing everything around the house.

As for co-sleeping pajamas, I like to put Jackson in a cotton gown for bed and then I usually do the "baby burritto" with a flannel blanket so he's all swaddled and cozy. I typically only have our covers up to my waist so they don't reach him yet.

Back to work now, sigh!

Pam

[JenInMpls]

Originally Posted by MamaAcorn

I typically only have our covers up to my waist so they don't reach him yet.

brrr! how do you stay warm??? I was freezing last night and so concerned about tristan being too warm. at some point i gave in and pulled the cotton blanket and sheet up over my shoulders and him, and pulled the wool blanket up to my ribs and i finally got comfy enough to fall asleep. he didn't seem to mind; stacy, i tried your setup with diaper and me topless, it made life a lot easier. and...

tristan slept from midnight to 6! and then nursed in bed!! no crying! no getting up! halleluia! it's crazy how i can put my breast near his face and he somehow manages to latch himself on.

chiro appt today.

j

[adventuregirl]

at night i have been dressing nessa in a poly gown/baggie thing (avoiding cotton because if she leaks, she feels so wet, the poly keeps her feeling drier). if she's in the bed with me, i pull the covers up to my waist/about to her chest and keep myself warm with one of her fleece blankets tucked around my upper body. i have been using the cosleeper more lately, i tend to sleep a little better when she's in there, but sometimes she falls asleep better in the bed, so we go back and forth. i tend to be more concerned about her not being warm enough when she doesn't have my body heat right there.

chrissy, i'm glad lilah's temp went down.