A New Thread For Mamas Who Are Doing Child Led Weaning - Page 10

[Rox5266]

Hello, thought I'd join this thread after lurking for a while. I am doing CLW because I love my son so much and can't see ever taking away something he loves so much - he is 16 months now. I also am a WOHM mama and I see nursing as a special way to reconnect with him after a long, hard day at work.

He seems to be going through one of those times where he wants to nurse frequently, coming over to me when I am sitting down and grabbing at my shirt and trying to reach in and grab my boobs. I was glad to see this seems to be common with mommas doing CLW.

I am also getting pretty fed up with his twiddling! He is not gentle, twisting and pinching my nipple. I try my best to protect myself, but it is a battle of wills most off the time! I haven't figured out how to get him to stop nicely yet.

Anyway,I love this thread! Thank you ladies, all your info really helps!

Roxanne
Mom to Daniel 8/9/03

[eilonwy]

Originally Posted by Rox5266

I am also getting pretty fed up with his twiddling! He is not gentle, twisting and pinching my nipple. I try my best to protect myself, but it is a battle of wills most off the time! I haven't figured out how to get him to stop nicely yet.

My son stopped twiddling when I gave him someting else to do. Now, he likes to drive a matchbox car over my breast while he's nursing. :LOL Ah, the joys of a nursing toddler!

[Embee]

Ok, everything I know about CLW tells me this isn't something I should read much into, but it's a first for us. DS hasn't asked to nurse in upwards of 4 days. You'd think after the gradual dropping off over the last year, I wouldn't be much noticing it, but honestly, I do feel in my heart that he might be headed in the weaning direction... The longest he's gone without is two days. Had to grab Mothering Your Nursing Toddler off the shelf and do some brush up. I flipped through the pages and there was actually a section on spontaneous holiday weaning?!

Anyway, it feels truly strange to have gone 4 days without nursing. Might I say, I feel a little sad, panicky? I know he's four but indeed, my baby and he's growing up. At any rate, I think we're into the on and off portion of the nursing show. 4 years and counting... but if he's ready, he's ready. Which is good. Bittersweet for me... but such an accomplishment for him. Honestly, as much as I've loved and embrace CLW, I did think I'd feel more relieved about heading toward weaning. I'm definitely more mixed feeling than I'd thought I'd be.

Thanks for the ramble. Feelings, thoughts, experiences?

[callmemama]

Embee, I think that's where my 5yo and I are right now. He just turned 5 last month and a couple of weeks ago, he went almost a week without nursing. Then we talked about it (after I came here for advice!) because I didn't want to let our nursing relationship go without acknowledging it. He informed me that he hadn't stopped and when I told him it was normal and that all children did eventually, he replied "I might not!". Then he nursed every night for a week, and now once again he's missed several nights in a row. It is most definitely bittersweet, but I'm glad he's secure enough to feel ready or to at least experiment with some "dry spells"! Cold turkey would be hard on this mama, though!!

[mother_sunshine]

Embee

Dd would skip a day, then skip a few days, then skip a week, then go back to every day, then skip a week... I knew weaning was coming but I didn't know when. It wasn't a steady decline, it was more up and down. So, even though all children are different and wean in their own time, I wouldn't call it over yet. Even though your ds doesn't know what the future holds either, it does help to talk about it openly just to express yourselves (and help set a precendent for open communication once weaning does happen).

It is bittersweet. Nursing is something that has been such a huge part of our life together, it's hard to just let it go without conflicting feelings of joy and sadness. It's a cool rite of passage though, full of pride and satisfaction knowing that we survived the whole journey.

[Embee]

Thank you both so much for your insights and support. As it turn out, DS awoke in the night (bad dream) and guess what? "I want to nunny." It was less than 30 seconds, but I cherished it dearly, knowing that we may well be on the on and off again road...

*sigh*

The best,
Em

[TiredX2]

Thank you everyone for just *being* I really needed to check in on here after reading the "need help weaning" thread. MDC is supposed to be my CLW "safe" place, kwim?

Anyway

[Heavenly]

Let me ask a question - do they eventually sleep through the night? Anybody? Anybody? Olivia is almost 26 months and she still wakes at least 3 times a night, often much more. We don't co-sleep, she is in a twin bed in her own room so I either nurse her in our bed and then take her back to bed or nurse her laying down in her bed and then sneak out. She falls back asleep quickly, that's not a problem. Its just the amount of times she is up! I have been having really bad problems falling asleep because I am laying there in anticipation of her waking up. She has been waking up right when I fall asleep and now I can't sleep. Last night I couldn't fall asleep until after she woke the first time at 12:30 am. I nursed her and left her room at 12:40 am. I had to take some melatonin to fall asleep. She woke again at 2:10 and I was just so exhausted I marched her back to bed, told her she did not need to nurse and left. Surprisingly she didn't cry and went back to sleep. Just to say I normally do not ever say that but I was just so tired. Anyways she slept until 5:40 which is good for her as she has been waking every 15-20 minutes from 4:00 am onwards. I nursed her back to sleep at 5:40 and she went back to sleep until 7:00 am! Normall she wakes for the day at 6. Anyways she went 5 hours without nursing. i can deal with that, I just need some solid sleep. I am a basket case, I can't play or be patient with the kids like I want because I am exhausted!

[callmemama]

My ds nightweaned on his own at 2.5 years. We <still> co-sleep. When he was waking to nurse at night, it really helped! But to each his own. I know all kiddos are different and there are some on here that haven't nightweaned by 3.5, and some that have chosen to gently nightwean. I hope you find the support ... and sleep! ... that you need! This too shall pass.

[MamaAllNatural]

Yes, Tired, that one made me sad too. 16 months old? : Anywho...

Funny you should ask that Heavenly. I started a thread a couple of months ago that natural nightweaning *does* eventually happen. :LOL DD stopped night nursing completely on her own at 3 years old. If you could find that thread you can read some other replies of the ages other people's children night weaned on their own.

[Peppamint]

My dd was so weird, she was sleeping through the night pretty much starting at 2 weeks old and was 99% nightweaned at that point. Talk about uncomfortable boobies in the morning! She also weaned on her own at almost 21 months.

Ds on the other hand... he still wakes up, once or twice a night I think. We cosleep so I just roll over so he can latch on and I go back to sleep! It usually doesn't bother me, so nightweaning isn't a big thing for me... but if it was affecting my sleep I know I'd have different feelings about it.

I still feel sad that dd weaned so "early". Not early by cultural standards, but early by CLW standards. :LOL

[mother_sunshine]

Originally Posted by TiredX2

Thank you everyone for just *being* I really needed to check in on here after reading the "need help weaning" thread. MDC is supposed to be my CLW "safe" place, kwim?

Anyway

I was avoiding that thread but finally just went and read it. Does she even know this is Mothering?

(sorry mods, I know we're not supposed to talk about other threads, but better here than there, yeah?)

[mom2threenurslings]

I avoided that thread...I just can't deal with it right now!

Natural nightweaning .... yes, it does happen. When depends on the child. My first self-nightweaned at around 12 months old, my second at 18-19 months, and my third is 2.5 years old and continues to night nurse several times a night. I may have a different view of nightweaning than others ... to me nightweaning is when they no longer nurse while I'm sleeping. I don't include nursing to sleep or nursing right before I get out of bed.

Speaking of nursing...my two nurslings are requesting that we watch a Little House on the Prairie DVD (my b-day gift to myself!) and nurse.

[mother_sunshine]

That is my view of nightweaning too. Dd nursed to sleep til she was 6yrs (almost 7), and she nursed upon waking at dawn for I don't remember how many years but it was at least til 4 or 5.


I LOVED Little House of the Prairie! It's on tv sometimes but I can't seem to figure out when.

[Peppamint]

I love Little House too. Mmmm, Michael Landon! Okay, I just embarrassed myself, but he always seemed so wholesome. KWIM?

Back ON-topic, I looked for the aforementioned thread. I wanted to respond in a good way, but couldn't even think of anything to say since she obviously intends to wean.

[mountain mom]

Can we find a creative way to link us to that thread? Perhaps a pm? I am curious, kind of like a carwreck curiousity, kind of way. :

All of you are so wonderful! I had a few road bumps with family and bfing this holiday season. I have found my balance and dd is thriving because of it, she is so healthy! All of the kids in our families are sick with 'holiday flu' and dd is just cruising along. She rocks!

Thanks to all for you continued support!

[Heavenly]

I am not planning on nightweaning, I believe in full child-led weaning. But I am trying to see if she will go to sleep without it in the middle of the night. I figure if I say go back to sleep sweetie and she does without a word then she didn't really need it. I don't count nursing to sleep or nursing early morning night-nursing. Actually I don't really consider it night nursing until I'm asleep. So if she wakes up 10:30 pm and I'm not in bed yet that's not night nursing to me. Hopefully tonight will be more restful.

I totally agree on the weaning thing. I know its not nice to judge but it is so hard when I hear of babies so young being weaned. At 16 months Olivia was still such a little baby. She was still nursing like an infant, she'd only started solids a couple of months before.

[MamaAllNatural]

I had no idea people defined night weaning as not nursing to sleep or upon morning waking either! Wow, that's really sad to me. I always thought it just meant not nursing *during* the night.


mountain mom,

I think it's called need weaning tips and is in this forum.

Also, I'm glad to hear your dd is doing well and that you guys made it through the holidays with the families.

[mountain mom]

Thanks Mama all Natural and BusyBusyMommy for the info.

Man, if dd didn't nurse to sleep or in the early hours of the am before getting out of bed, we would pretty much be done! She only asks for boob many 1 time in 7 days during the day. She is really connected at night before bed and just as we awake.

I really think that this is her attachment to dreamtime or the spiritual world that brings her to the breast. To deny that for her would be awful for her and for me. She is angelic at these times. She is completely at peace with her creator and its beautiful to see. I wish this for all the woman who nurse their little angels!

We are at 37 months and proud of it!

Plus on a logical note, bedtime is mostly a happy time, a loving time, a time for her and I to connect. I never have to encourage her bedtime, she does. It is simple a beautiful thing.

[~*Cherimoya*~]

Coming into this thread late, but I wanted to say that as many times as I have "planned" on weaning and said "this is the weekend" or "just night weaning", I always chicken out and decide that breastfeeding my 27 month old is one of the best ways for us to bond because he's such a busy kid and really enjoys our nursing time. When I think of weaning, I see his sweet little face when he's nursing to sleep or looking up at me while having a nip of milk and I realize that child led weaning is best for us...at this point. I know that things can change, but he's my last baby and I want to savor every moment and allow him to do so as well.