OK, I admit that this is a really sensitive topic for me, and why will probably become quickly apparent here. To those who believe that kids should eat what they are served or "they at least have to try stuff" or "they have to take 3 bites" or whatever, what do you or will you do when they don't?
My husband and I went around and around on this one. If you set up the rule, what do you do when they don't follow it? Do you force them to sit at the table until they do -- all night? Do you physically put it in their mouths? Do you present it for 3 days straight until they eat it?
I am sure that my parents thought they were doing the right thing when they started this rule. But this was something that I could control. So I didn't eat it ("it" being liver in the most memorable of these battles). I sat until my parents were ready to go to bed. But they were stubborn and so was I. So they tied me to the chair so I couldn't get up while they slept. Of course, that resulted in a mess, so I was whipped for that. Afterwards, they tried to force it into my mouth. I vomited. They tried to force THAT into my mouth. I vomited some more. So I was whipped again. THIS is where a power struggle can take you, because once it starts, no one wants to give in.
So before you make arbitrary rules, be sure you know how the scene will play out if they aren't followed. But more importantly, why do it to begin with? Yes, research shows that it takes a lot of exposure before children will try new things. It DOESN'T say they actually need to eat it -- just be exposed to it (e.g. see it on their plates). Do you eat things you don't like? I'll bet you don't even cook it, let alone eat it. Why should your children be forced to do so? Because it's good for them? Because it "builds character". There are probably easier and better ways to get whatever nutrients are in the disliked food and better ways to teach manners and character. Do you continue to eat once you are full? I'll bet not. So why force your children to do so?
The whole idea of forcing trial, forcing food that is disliked or sitting on the plate strikes me as profoundly disrespectful of the child and very "anti-AP".
My husband and I went around and around on this one. If you set up the rule, what do you do when they don't follow it? Do you force them to sit at the table until they do -- all night? Do you physically put it in their mouths? Do you present it for 3 days straight until they eat it?
I am sure that my parents thought they were doing the right thing when they started this rule. But this was something that I could control. So I didn't eat it ("it" being liver in the most memorable of these battles). I sat until my parents were ready to go to bed. But they were stubborn and so was I. So they tied me to the chair so I couldn't get up while they slept. Of course, that resulted in a mess, so I was whipped for that. Afterwards, they tried to force it into my mouth. I vomited. They tried to force THAT into my mouth. I vomited some more. So I was whipped again. THIS is where a power struggle can take you, because once it starts, no one wants to give in.
So before you make arbitrary rules, be sure you know how the scene will play out if they aren't followed. But more importantly, why do it to begin with? Yes, research shows that it takes a lot of exposure before children will try new things. It DOESN'T say they actually need to eat it -- just be exposed to it (e.g. see it on their plates). Do you eat things you don't like? I'll bet you don't even cook it, let alone eat it. Why should your children be forced to do so? Because it's good for them? Because it "builds character". There are probably easier and better ways to get whatever nutrients are in the disliked food and better ways to teach manners and character. Do you continue to eat once you are full? I'll bet not. So why force your children to do so?
The whole idea of forcing trial, forcing food that is disliked or sitting on the plate strikes me as profoundly disrespectful of the child and very "anti-AP".
: OMG That is so disgusting. I am so sorry you were put through that. 
s
It was a mistake for me to even try to win that one. I was so caught up in "can't let my child show me any disrespect!" It wasn't about wasting food at all, it was about showing someone who was boss. 
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