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Observations of 3 ~ Support group for parents of Three Year Olds! - Page 7post #121 of 1344/30/06 at 4:48pmpost #122 of 1345/5/06 at 11:23pm
Let's feel all our 3 year old pain togetherfor all of us!
All my friends warned me that is wasn't the 'terrible twos' but the threes that were awful. They were so right! Ds is an angel one moment and the next: biting,kicking, hitting etc. The guilt is SOOOOOOOOOOOO overwhelming. I think, "What have I done wrong to make him act like this?" So overwhelming especially as a single parent! I never taught him to do this stuff! Where is it coming from? Can I survive a year of this? Totally unsure of last question! DS dragging feet on potty, all my choice cuss words have to be eliminated because he repeats , won't stay in time out, ......still wonderful but who is he? Not exactly who I brought into this world.post #123 of 1345/14/08 at 9:06amWith DS it was totally terrible, but DD is a dream child IMO. She has always been so sweet, lovable, kind and thoughtful. She loves to share and has never had to of been asked to do so. She gives hugs and kisses all the time. If she is excited about something (for example, when we were looking at pictures), she will keep hugging who ever is close by and will say "I love you!!" a lot. She listens well, puts things away and will help if we need her to.
Yes, she has her times. She still nurses....a lot! That wears one me. Her feelings are very easily hurt and if she starts crying about something, she can be at it all day unless I can find something to distract her (she really upset a girl at the playground one day because she was howling for about 10-15 minutes when she couldn't get the swing right when she wanted it). She gets very upset if something is unjust as everything has to be fair.
So she's a wonderful child but has her times (although infrequently). DS was the total opposite. Of course he is still a challenge to parent; some kids are easier than others!post #124 of 1345/15/08 at 11:48amThis is funny to see again. The 3 year old that I posted about on this thread is nearly 5 1/2 now and my little one is almost 3. They are so different. Whereas, ds1 was a very easy two year old and a harder 3-4 year old, ds2 is quite the challenging 2 year old. I hope my theory that easy 2s make for harder 3/4s and harder 2s make for easier 3/4s is right! It's looking like my little wild one will only be more challenging as time goes on, though.post #125 of 1345/15/08 at 12:03pmMy 3 year-old (our third child) has been our "easiest" so far, but I think a lot of that comes just from experience as well as adjusted expectations, lol.
He is easier in a lot of ways than at 2... continuing to increase his ability to play independently, feeding/eating is a lot easier because he can totally feed himself now and spills a lot less, he's weaned now, sleeping much more consistently and longer at night, a lot more social and all three kids play really great together, extremely verbal and able to explain feelings ("I'm mad right now because she won't ____" or whatever).
Then there are the challenges of 3... the nap is starting to get pretty dicey (whether he'll nap is anyone's guess - he naps about 5 days out of 7 but even if he's exhausted from a big morning sometimes he won't nap and then he's MISERABLE by like 5-6pm and then when he DOES nap he has trouble falling asleep at bedtime)... he now has a very clear idea of how he wants things done and when they aren't done according to his exacting specifications lol he is more likely to have a fuss over it (e.g., art projects, how he wants his sandcastle to look, etc.) - kind of like he wants to be able to do it like a bigger kid and gets frustrated when his grand plan doesn't work out... playing with a more diverse group of kids brings the first experiences with bullying and kids who don't play nicely and that is always hard (probably almost more for the parents)... and just getting more tantrumy/whiny - it's almost like they go through 2 and you have that a little bit but then as they mature and SHOULD be able to talk their way out of something or handle frustration they go through this period (in my kids it's always been age 3 to 3 1/2+) where they almost regress and can handle frustration WORSE than at 2. It's like, okay, I'm sorry I took the lid of your yogurt and you wanted to do it but let's move on. My 6 year-olds are totally unfazed by this stuff anymore and they shake their heads like WHY is he so upset about his yogurt, lol. Uh, because he's 3.post #126 of 1345/15/08 at 9:13pmI can't believe this thread is four years old! Thats amazing!
I have a 3yo who was 3 in Jan. Holy moly - he went from being the most wonderful 2yo ever to being a holy terror. NIGHTMARE most days, but always with moments of true endearment. Too bad we can't put pictures up, but there are loads of pics of him on my blog (just scroll down a bit). At any rate, it's great to commiserate, notice, and discuss w/others in the same boat.
What I noticed today is that he's way more aware of people discussing HIM than he used to be. He's 3.25 right now, and even right at 3 he was kinda clueless about that kind of stuff. Now, though, he's totally a ham in company and really likes to be the center of attention.
Also I got quite sharp with him at bedtime today, and instead of being at all remorseful (after 11 VERY fun and full hours of entertainment by yours truly) he said, I just want some love, mama. Geesh - go melt someone's heart who isn't on overtime, is what I felt like saying, but he got another hug, another kiss, and another DO NOT GET OUT OF BED from me, instead.post #127 of 1345/16/08 at 5:55pmpost #128 of 1347/15/13 at 8:18pmpost #129 of 1347/17/13 at 1:20pmpost #130 of 1349/22/13 at 3:41pmpost #131 of 13411/9/13 at 5:59pmpost #132 of 13411/12/13 at 5:11pmHey, I'm all for reviving this thread! My babe was born two days after my oldest turned three. So I'm home for the year with the two of them and wonder why no one warned me this was the wrong age to full time parent! Thankfully he can be very sweet and loving and I think the year together will prove to pay off in the long run as we have to figure out how to work things out he and I. But wow, I'm amazed at how challenging he is.
It's the throwing that sets me off. He will have some mornings where all he does is throw stuff around. I'm amazed we have no broken windows yet. He throws toys, household objects, you name it. We have an old home with the original windows so there's no replacing one withou making it stand out like a sore thumb. I keep telling him it's not ok to throw in the house and will take some stuff from him. But he can always find something to throw. Will do time ins when I can manage it, but not consistent I'll admit. It's getting cold outside so I can't just move us outside to burn off energy without a whole lot of effort, plus lots of rainy days lately. I'm wondering if he will eventually clue in throwing snt ok or if I need to step up the consequences. Any thoughts?post #133 of 13411/12/13 at 7:21pm
From 33 to 38 months, it was as if I had lost my DD. Thankfully, she is back but I was very tempted to outsource childcare to a full-time preschool. I'm glad that we got through it but I wasn't easy for either of us. I lost it a couple of time and said a few mean things that I wish I could take back but I've learned from my mistakes and hope to never repeat them.
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